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maisierosereads's review
emotional
funny
hopeful
reflective
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
4.0
Between Perfect and Real is such an apt title for this book. It's a wonderfully written contemporary coming-of-age story about Dean Foster, and how starring as Romeo in the school play helps him to come out as trans to his friends, family, and school. I'm certain that many trans and nonbinary people will see themselves reflected in these pages - not just through Dean's narrative, but also through the other trans and nonbinary characters we meet through a support group Dean attends, showing that not all trans and nonbinary people are the same or even have identical experiences. There is other queer representation, too, with a range of sexualities shown across the cast of side characters. There were so many moments in this book which were eerily similar to my own experiences and those of my queer loved ones; it was refreshing, and I'm so glad that queer & trans teenagers will have this book to look to for representation!
The characters were definitely not all perfect, and some of their mistakes were worse than others - the main character included. That being said, most of them were still very much likeable, and showed strong character development.
Ray Stoeve did a great job reflecting common negative experiences such as transphobia and relationship difficulties whilst keeping the overall tone of the book hopeful. I love that they completely avoided using Dean's deadname, and also included educational moments (e.g. unsafe vs safe binding) for readers who may not already have that knowledge. I also really liked the ending, which just like the title and book as a whole had a great balance of realism, optimism, and happiness.
Overall, I highly recommend this book. It's a very impressive YA debut and I can't wait to see what Ray Stoeve will write in the future!
Many thanks to the publisher for giving me access to an eARC through NetGalley so that I could write this review!
The characters were definitely not all perfect, and some of their mistakes were worse than others - the main character included. That being said, most of them were still very much likeable, and showed strong character development.
Ray Stoeve did a great job reflecting common negative experiences such as transphobia and relationship difficulties whilst keeping the overall tone of the book hopeful. I love that they completely avoided using Dean's deadname, and also included educational moments (e.g. unsafe vs safe binding) for readers who may not already have that knowledge. I also really liked the ending, which just like the title and book as a whole had a great balance of realism, optimism, and happiness.
Overall, I highly recommend this book. It's a very impressive YA debut and I can't wait to see what Ray Stoeve will write in the future!
Many thanks to the publisher for giving me access to an eARC through NetGalley so that I could write this review!
Content Warnings
Graphic: Transphobia and Bullying
Moderate: Homophobia and Violence
Minor: Suicide, Deadnaming, and Drug use
gem114's review
emotional
hopeful
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
5.0
With books like Between Perfect and Real, I truly feel like the kids are going to be alright. ❤
When Dean is cast as Romeo in the school play, the role helps confirm for him that he is a trans guy, not a lesbian. He decides to come out, and the story details the varied reactions of Dean's friends and family.
This novel brought me right back to high school, in good and (not so good) ways. The character development is excellent and both the characters and their relationships/interactions are realistic. The teens really talk and act like teens! And the parents (for better and for worse) really talk and act like parents.
I would definitely recommend this book to teens and adults alike. I love love love the focus on the beauty of queer friendships and chosen family, but if homophobia/transhobia are triggers for you, be sure to take care of yourself while reading because those play a large role in the plot also.
Thank you to NetGalley and ABRAMS Kids for providing me this ARC in exchange for my honest review.
When Dean is cast as Romeo in the school play, the role helps confirm for him that he is a trans guy, not a lesbian. He decides to come out, and the story details the varied reactions of Dean's friends and family.
This novel brought me right back to high school, in good and (not so good) ways. The character development is excellent and both the characters and their relationships/interactions are realistic. The teens really talk and act like teens! And the parents (for better and for worse) really talk and act like parents.
I would definitely recommend this book to teens and adults alike. I love love love the focus on the beauty of queer friendships and chosen family, but if homophobia/transhobia are triggers for you, be sure to take care of yourself while reading because those play a large role in the plot also.
Thank you to NetGalley and ABRAMS Kids for providing me this ARC in exchange for my honest review.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Transphobia, Violence, and Bullying
Moderate: Deadnaming, Physical abuse, Homophobia, and Hate crime
utopiastateofmind's review
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
4.25
(Disclaimer: I received this book from Netgalley. This has not impacted my review which is unbiased and honest.)
Between Perfect and Real examines the space between what we expect and reality. The space between our dreams and pedestals and our every day lives and struggles. This book is about bridging that gap. About recognizing the spaces between and how we bring them together. Dean's cast role as Romeo helps give voice and language to a feeling Dean's been struggling with forever. At the same time, it also confronts him with scary questions, coming out, and his girlfriend. Between Perfect and Real was emotional and heart wrenching.
It's tender and explorative as Dean figures out what this means for his life and his future. There are moments of joy as he figures out what his future could hold. Yet at the same time there are real moments of sadness as the future he envisioned crumbles, as he is bullied and as he comes out to his parents. Between Perfect and Real is complex. It celebrates friendships which are supportive, ones that makes mistakes, and everything in between. It features love that hurts, that you want to work out, that fights the writing on the wall.
Between Perfect and Real examines the space between what we expect and reality. The space between our dreams and pedestals and our every day lives and struggles. This book is about bridging that gap. About recognizing the spaces between and how we bring them together. Dean's cast role as Romeo helps give voice and language to a feeling Dean's been struggling with forever. At the same time, it also confronts him with scary questions, coming out, and his girlfriend. Between Perfect and Real was emotional and heart wrenching.
It's tender and explorative as Dean figures out what this means for his life and his future. There are moments of joy as he figures out what his future could hold. Yet at the same time there are real moments of sadness as the future he envisioned crumbles, as he is bullied and as he comes out to his parents. Between Perfect and Real is complex. It celebrates friendships which are supportive, ones that makes mistakes, and everything in between. It features love that hurts, that you want to work out, that fights the writing on the wall.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Transphobia
Moderate: Homophobia and Deadnaming
Minor: Suicide
alertnerd's review
emotional
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
4.0
Dean just came out as a lesbian not too long ago -- the only problem is, Dean’s really a trans guy. After he gets cast as a “nontraditional” Romeo in his school’s play, Dean wants everyone -- including his girlfriend -- to see him as a guy.
Between Perfect and Real is a story about first-loves, discovering yourself, the family you’re born into and the family you choose.
Maybe it’s just because I’m an obsessively organized person, but I really loved the way this book was organized and broken up into the different “acts” to mirror the play Dean was rehearsing for. It really helped the story flow.
I also really loved Dean’s friend group and how Ray Stoeve showed how transphobia can be present even in all-queer groups.
I also appreciated the attempts at discussing race and privilege, but some of those parts felt a little tacked-on after the fact and a little cringey.
This is a beautiful debut by Ray Stoeve, and I can’t wait to see what they put out next.
TW: transphobia, deadnaming (the name isn’t said), slurs, bullying
Release date: April 13, 2021
Thanks to Netgalley and Amulet Books for this ARC!
Content Warnings
Graphic: Bullying, Homophobia, and Transphobia
Minor: Deadnaming
valereads's review
emotional
hopeful
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
There’s no such thing a perfect – but this book comes pretty darn close.
This novel follows 17 year old trans boy, Dean. When he is cast as the male lead in the school play he begins exploring his gender further and realises he needs to come out and transition. It explores how his relationships with friends, family, his girlfriend and himself change and stay the same as he comes out and begins to socially transition.
This book was beautifully written. At times it felt more like poetry than a prose novel but it was still written in an accessible way. I really enjoyed the experience of reading it.
As a genderqueer trans man myself, I found the descriptions of dysphoria and the experience of being trans really spoke to me. Stoeve managed to capture these feelings in prose in a way that felt genuine and was beautifully written.
If I had any criticisms it’s that some parts were predictable but then again I am a 23 year old man and this is a YA novel so it’s not something that should bother most people. There was also a minor plot point which I thought would come back up but didn’t go anywhere – perhaps I read too much into it.
Overall I absolutely adore this book. A beautifully written novel of a trans guy figuring out who he is and what he needs set to the backdrop of my favourite play, Romeo and Juliet – it’s like it was written for me! I definitely recommend this book to anyone with even the slightest interest, trans or cis, it will not disappoint.
Content warnings: bullying, homophobia, transphobia, misgendering, outing, dysphoria, references to suicide
Content Warnings
Graphic: Bullying, Hate crime, Homophobia, and Transphobia
Moderate: Biphobia, Bullying, Cursing, Deadnaming, Death, Drug use, Hate crime, Homophobia, Panic attacks/disorders, Transphobia, and Violence
Minor: Biphobia, Bullying, Cursing, Deadnaming, Death, Drug use, Hate crime, Homophobia, Suicide, Transphobia, and Violence
ilikebooks_okay's review
challenging
emotional
informative
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
4.0
This was such a great an informative read! I always love seeing people's different experiences with their gender as I relate strongly to this topic!
I really think Ray Stoeve did amazing and has produced an amazing debut novel!
I'm not the biggest fan of books revolving around acting classes and such as I usually find those scenes a bit boring lol but in this book it was such a crucial element! As you could see Dean explore his own transness when he is given a lead male role!
"So it's up to you to decide how you want to look, what makes you feel like yourself."
I also loved the diversity of characters ranging in identities, sexualities, age and ethnicities. Which is also why I was a little disappointed that some people you just don't learn enough about! There were so many characters that peaked my interest but weren't delved into really at all. I hope this however opens up more books to go with this one!
"I want the life I never got"
I could bring up more however my review is getting pretty long :,) overall this was a brilliant book which delved into coming to terms with transness from all points of views which I really loved. This was heartbreaking at times but also really inspirational! I defiently recommend! :)
"The possibilies are endless."
Tw: Transphobia, Deadnaming
Thank you to NetGalley and publishers for this free eArc, this is my honest review.
I really think Ray Stoeve did amazing and has produced an amazing debut novel!
I'm not the biggest fan of books revolving around acting classes and such as I usually find those scenes a bit boring lol but in this book it was such a crucial element! As you could see Dean explore his own transness when he is given a lead male role!
"So it's up to you to decide how you want to look, what makes you feel like yourself."
I also loved the diversity of characters ranging in identities, sexualities, age and ethnicities. Which is also why I was a little disappointed that some people you just don't learn enough about! There were so many characters that peaked my interest but weren't delved into really at all. I hope this however opens up more books to go with this one!
"I want the life I never got"
I could bring up more however my review is getting pretty long :,) overall this was a brilliant book which delved into coming to terms with transness from all points of views which I really loved. This was heartbreaking at times but also really inspirational! I defiently recommend! :)
"The possibilies are endless."
Tw: Transphobia, Deadnaming
Thank you to NetGalley and publishers for this free eArc, this is my honest review.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Deadnaming and Transphobia
booksthatburn's review
emotional
reflective
slow-paced
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
3.5
*I received a free review copy in exchange for an honest review of this book.
As a trans person this was stressful and difficult to read. Not because of inaccuracies (the dysphoria felt extremely realistic and very draining), but because it spends so much time dwelling on all the stuff that sucks and how dysphoric the MC feels that I didn’t feel like I got to know any of the other characters. I wish I'd gotten a sense of who his friends are separate from how they did or did not help him come out. Even conversations which weren’t about gender would often fade into an internal monologue as the MC either couldn't pay attention or actively tuned them out. Later on when he's a lot less dysphoric the non-transition conversations would get summaries and the transition-focused conversations would get full dialogue. When he finds a supportive space and starts to have other trans people to talk to him it felt good at first, but then it became clear that the book was setting up tension between him and his girlfriend by him not communicating well and her thinking that his friendships with the trans group were a threat to her relationship with him. For a book so good at depicting how to navigate various medical aspects of a transmasc experience it felt like it sacrificed any attempts at modeling healthy social transition. His girlfriend would probably have felt a lot less isolated and threatened by his new friendships if he’d been able to communicate more clearly with her. I understand that part of it is he's a teenager, and teenagers not doing the right thing is part of writing realistic teenagers, but I find it hard to believe that in the hours and hours of transition video footage he didn't look up anything on how to come out to his family, come out to friends, or come out to his girlfriend. Even a few lines about how he'd seen those and they weren't any help might have fixed it (I read an ARC, so I don't know if the final version has changes like this).
It felt like the narrative had a very medicalized focus on transition. Pronoun etiquette aside (I appreciated that), almost every conversation about being trans had some piece about his body, trans bodies generally, binding, hormones, etc. And that’s a huge part of some people’s transitions, sure, but it meant that often the book felt like it was being trans 101 more than a story. But also, if you don’t know what I mean by “trans 101” “dysphoria”, “medicalized... transition”, or “pronoun etiquette”, then give this a try. It’s pretty accurate to one way transitioning can look and I hope it helps people. I read this as an ARC so it's possible some of my reservations were addressed in the final edit, but it would gut the book and turn it into an completely different narrative to refocus it away from the medical aspects of transition since that is so much of the plot.
Overall I'd recommend this as one transmasc perspective on navigating a lot of the more stressful parts of coming out, even if the MC isn't perfect at it. Seeing some things not work but it mostly ending up okay is really important. I do give the warning that there's a lot of dysphoric ideation and so this might be a stressful read for anyone with dysphoria or certain kinds of body dysmorphia.
As a trans person this was stressful and difficult to read. Not because of inaccuracies (the dysphoria felt extremely realistic and very draining), but because it spends so much time dwelling on all the stuff that sucks and how dysphoric the MC feels that I didn’t feel like I got to know any of the other characters. I wish I'd gotten a sense of who his friends are separate from how they did or did not help him come out. Even conversations which weren’t about gender would often fade into an internal monologue as the MC either couldn't pay attention or actively tuned them out. Later on when he's a lot less dysphoric the non-transition conversations would get summaries and the transition-focused conversations would get full dialogue. When he finds a supportive space and starts to have other trans people to talk to him it felt good at first, but then it became clear that the book was setting up tension between him and his girlfriend by him not communicating well and her thinking that his friendships with the trans group were a threat to her relationship with him. For a book so good at depicting how to navigate various medical aspects of a transmasc experience it felt like it sacrificed any attempts at modeling healthy social transition. His girlfriend would probably have felt a lot less isolated and threatened by his new friendships if he’d been able to communicate more clearly with her. I understand that part of it is he's a teenager, and teenagers not doing the right thing is part of writing realistic teenagers, but I find it hard to believe that in the hours and hours of transition video footage he didn't look up anything on how to come out to his family, come out to friends, or come out to his girlfriend. Even a few lines about how he'd seen those and they weren't any help might have fixed it (I read an ARC, so I don't know if the final version has changes like this).
It felt like the narrative had a very medicalized focus on transition. Pronoun etiquette aside (I appreciated that), almost every conversation about being trans had some piece about his body, trans bodies generally, binding, hormones, etc. And that’s a huge part of some people’s transitions, sure, but it meant that often the book felt like it was being trans 101 more than a story. But also, if you don’t know what I mean by “trans 101” “dysphoria”, “medicalized... transition”, or “pronoun etiquette”, then give this a try. It’s pretty accurate to one way transitioning can look and I hope it helps people. I read this as an ARC so it's possible some of my reservations were addressed in the final edit, but it would gut the book and turn it into an completely different narrative to refocus it away from the medical aspects of transition since that is so much of the plot.
Overall I'd recommend this as one transmasc perspective on navigating a lot of the more stressful parts of coming out, even if the MC isn't perfect at it. Seeing some things not work but it mostly ending up okay is really important. I do give the warning that there's a lot of dysphoric ideation and so this might be a stressful read for anyone with dysphoria or certain kinds of body dysmorphia.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Bullying and Transphobia
Moderate: Homophobia and Violence
Minor: Deadnaming and Suicide
CW for deadnaming (not depicted), misgendering, homophobia, dysphoria, transphobia, bullying, violence, suicide (not depicted).
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