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goblingirlreads's review against another edition
emotional
inspiring
reflective
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
5.0
I LOVE DEAN!!
I'm a drama educator and this story is really special to me because theater can be a really oppressive place for trans youth or it can be an affirming place. It's up to every theater person to help make theater an affirming place for trans people and I think Dean's story is an amazing example of that. There were so many elements of this story that I loved. There were really heartbreaking sections about acceptance, bullying, dysphoria, even a mention of suicide that gutted me but this book was also full of hope. Not everything is perfect for Dean but there is so much possibility for what's next for him. The parts of the book where he finds kinship and found family from other queer and trans people were some of my favorite parts. In adulthood, I discovered that my whole friend group in high school was queer and trans. We probably gravitated to each other for that reason and didn't know it, none of us were out. I sometimes wonder how high school would have been different if we were. I'm not trans - I'm cis and bi - but having queer friends in my adulthood is so affirming and one of the best parts of my life. At the end of the book, it felt like Dean was at the cusp of that very exciting adulthood and that ending could not have been better for me.
I'm a drama educator and this story is really special to me because theater can be a really oppressive place for trans youth or it can be an affirming place. It's up to every theater person to help make theater an affirming place for trans people and I think Dean's story is an amazing example of that. There were so many elements of this story that I loved. There were really heartbreaking sections about acceptance, bullying, dysphoria, even a mention of suicide that gutted me but this book was also full of hope. Not everything is perfect for Dean but there is so much possibility for what's next for him. The parts of the book where he finds kinship and found family from other queer and trans people were some of my favorite parts. In adulthood, I discovered that my whole friend group in high school was queer and trans. We probably gravitated to each other for that reason and didn't know it, none of us were out. I sometimes wonder how high school would have been different if we were. I'm not trans - I'm cis and bi - but having queer friends in my adulthood is so affirming and one of the best parts of my life. At the end of the book, it felt like Dean was at the cusp of that very exciting adulthood and that ending could not have been better for me.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Transphobia and Bullying
Moderate: Suicide
carrotcake's review
emotional
hopeful
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
3.75
Considering I read this in 2 days you can bet your ass I liked it.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Bullying, Deadnaming, and Transphobia
Minor: Suicide
ofbooksandechos's review
emotional
hopeful
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
Non ci sono parole per descrivere cos'ha significato per me ascoltare questo libro. Bello bello bello.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Bullying, Deadnaming, Hate crime, and Transphobia
Minor: Suicide
camicapa's review
emotional
inspiring
lighthearted
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
4.0
A perfect contemporary coming of age book for theater/Shakespeare lovers.
Great writing: simple yet at times perfectly on-brand with the drama of live theater.
I fell in love with Dean and all his friends.
My only complaint was the ending. It felt unsatisfactory. I finished the last chapter, and for a second, I thought that another chapter or prologue was missing. But no. That was it. There were a couple of plot lines I thought needed closure that didn't get one. But that was the ending. Weird. Nevertheless, I loved everything else.
Great writing: simple yet at times perfectly on-brand with the drama of live theater.
I fell in love with Dean and all his friends.
My only complaint was the ending. It felt unsatisfactory. I finished the last chapter, and for a second, I thought that another chapter or prologue was missing. But no. That was it. There were a couple of plot lines I thought needed closure that didn't get one. But that was the ending. Weird. Nevertheless, I loved everything else.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Transphobia, Homophobia, and Violence
Minor: Suicide
betweentheshelves's review
emotional
informative
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Thanks to Abrams for sending an ARC of this book to the library where I work! This book was on my radar and I was happy to get a chance to read it early. And I'm happy to say that I'm not disappointed! A strong coming of age story about a trans guy finding his voice.
Many of the young adult books I've read recently focus on trans teens who have already gone through their coming out. What I liked about this is it takes us through Dean's process of coming out, the highs and the lows. He joins a support group, and they show him that there is no single way to be trans. This group, this found family is one of the best things about this book. Dean gets the support he needs through them, and his friends from school.
However, Dean's journey isn't without struggles. There are some instances of bullying and his mother isn't super accepting. Stoeve does an excellent job showing the complex feelings surrounding Dean's relationship with his mother. The analogies they use throughout the book are helpful for all kinds of readers, but I especially think trans teens will connect to it.
There were also a lot of great discussions about privilege within the queer community, since Dean's best friend is Black. There's also a lot of emphasis on the fact that trans teens need spaces to figure out their identity, to be able to have the support of others that know what they're going through. All around, there are just so many great messages in this book.
Since I'm not trans myself, I'd recommend checking out some own voices reviews on Goodreads!
Content Warnings
Graphic: Bullying, Cursing, Homophobia, and Transphobia
Moderate: Deadnaming, Violence, and Biphobia
Minor: Suicide
perpetualpages's review
challenging
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
CWs: Bullying, transphobia and transphobic violence, harassment, minor outings of a trans person, deadnaming (dead name not mentioned on the page), homophobia and homophobic slurs, mention of suicide, and explorations of dysphoria
Between Perfect and Real is a love letter to young trans readers. It's a story that shows a young character coming into his transness—fearing the unknown implications of what that can mean for him, how that might change his relationships, and how that might change how he sees and understands himself. It's a story that explores how we are often kept from our own transness because of fear, and because our minds reject that which they cannot imagine, and we are not taught to imagine ourselves as anything but static, straight, and cis.
As the story progresses, we see Dean gradually discovering these moments of gender euphoria—both on-stage and off. I really enjoy the use of theater and art as a means for exploring gender and identity. It isn't until Dean removes himself and loses himself in the character of Romeo that he's able to see himself no only inhabiting the "role" of a man, but actually being one. Theater is a safe way to move between those roles and hear his fellow actors refer to him as a man, which helps him finally make sense of the puzzle pieces. It also operates as a safe place to explore gender presentation, especially with his costuming, and it allows him to buy his first binder and safely pass it off as a "production expense." I appreciate that the story understands and celebrates the necessity of safe spaces, and theater is just one of those spaces for dean.
There's also a really great emphasis on the importance of found family and community support. This is one of the first YA books I've read that shows a young, questioning trans boy going to support groups with other queer people, having their ideas and insecurities challenged and coming to a place of feeling more confident and safe in their own body and their own experience. Dean also has a really great group of friends (some who are better allies than others). He has people he can trust to go back and forth between pronouns to avoid outing him, people who let him send discrete packages to their house so that he won't get in trouble with his parents, and people who want him to be exactly the person he is. Connection and support is so vital for young trans folks, especially, and I really appreciate that being shown on the page.
At the same time, the story doesn't shy away from hard conversations about how transness can challenge and change interpersonal relationships, and not always for the better. One of the more complex relationships at play here is the romantic relationship Dean has with his girlfriend, who got together with him when he identified as a lesbian. Throughout the story Dean decides he wants to come out to Zoe as a trans guy, and he battles with what that means for their relationship, how his transness might challenge Zoe's identity (if at all), and whether Zoe will be able to see him and love him as the boy he is, or whether she'll only ever see Dean "as a girl" because of his body and because of their shared history. There are times where Zoe makes Dean feel safe and times where she makes him feel unsafe, and that inconsistency is something a lot of trans folks experience. It's not always as simple as flipping a switch from "adjusting" to "acceptance."
That's also reflected in the relationship Dean has with his parents, specifically his mom. She has a hard time accepting his transness and seeing it as "real." This leads to Dean hiding things from his parents and tip-toeing around them, because he can never gauge whether they're going to be receptive or not. To me, not only is that a realistic reflection of what many trans kids face, but it also acknowledges the essential piece that comes from actually being seen, recognized, and respected as the gender you are—not just as "someone masquerading in different clothes." Gradually, Dean is coming to the realization that he will not minimize or erase parts of himself to make other people comfortable, even people who are as important as his parents. He is learning that he doesn't have to be grateful for scraps of decency, and that he deserves so much more.
Dean is a character who's in a really interesting place where he's questioning and exploring how he wants his own transness to look, which I think is important for young readers to see. Does he want to start wearing a binder? Does he want to go on hormones or not? Does he want to change his pronouns? Does he want to officially "come out" or does he just want to live his life for himself? There's no clear-cut right or wrong answer to any of these questions, and I think the story does a beautiful job of showing the validity of all the possibilities. Whatever Dean decides at the end isn't about what will make him "a more real trans person," but rather what is—or could be—best for him.
In the end, I think this story does a great job of showing how transness is merely a world of possibilities, and we all have to learn how to navigate those possibilities in a way that's true for us. It feels scary not because transness itself is scary, but because we are taught to fear transness and because the world continues to reinforces itself as a frightening, unwelcome, and unsafe place for trans people in so many ways. It seems scary because it's a part of ourselves we are not taught to know or recognize, and because we often lack a clear path forward—not because that path doesn't exist, but because we can't see it. I think this story is invaluable in the way it shows Dean confronting those fears, defining what's true for himself, and learning how to navigate his own path on his own terms.
To say that I recommend this book is an understatement, because it is certainly going to save and change lives.
Between Perfect and Real is a love letter to young trans readers. It's a story that shows a young character coming into his transness—fearing the unknown implications of what that can mean for him, how that might change his relationships, and how that might change how he sees and understands himself. It's a story that explores how we are often kept from our own transness because of fear, and because our minds reject that which they cannot imagine, and we are not taught to imagine ourselves as anything but static, straight, and cis.
As the story progresses, we see Dean gradually discovering these moments of gender euphoria—both on-stage and off. I really enjoy the use of theater and art as a means for exploring gender and identity. It isn't until Dean removes himself and loses himself in the character of Romeo that he's able to see himself no only inhabiting the "role" of a man, but actually being one. Theater is a safe way to move between those roles and hear his fellow actors refer to him as a man, which helps him finally make sense of the puzzle pieces. It also operates as a safe place to explore gender presentation, especially with his costuming, and it allows him to buy his first binder and safely pass it off as a "production expense." I appreciate that the story understands and celebrates the necessity of safe spaces, and theater is just one of those spaces for dean.
There's also a really great emphasis on the importance of found family and community support. This is one of the first YA books I've read that shows a young, questioning trans boy going to support groups with other queer people, having their ideas and insecurities challenged and coming to a place of feeling more confident and safe in their own body and their own experience. Dean also has a really great group of friends (some who are better allies than others). He has people he can trust to go back and forth between pronouns to avoid outing him, people who let him send discrete packages to their house so that he won't get in trouble with his parents, and people who want him to be exactly the person he is. Connection and support is so vital for young trans folks, especially, and I really appreciate that being shown on the page.
At the same time, the story doesn't shy away from hard conversations about how transness can challenge and change interpersonal relationships, and not always for the better. One of the more complex relationships at play here is the romantic relationship Dean has with his girlfriend, who got together with him when he identified as a lesbian. Throughout the story Dean decides he wants to come out to Zoe as a trans guy, and he battles with what that means for their relationship, how his transness might challenge Zoe's identity (if at all), and whether Zoe will be able to see him and love him as the boy he is, or whether she'll only ever see Dean "as a girl" because of his body and because of their shared history. There are times where Zoe makes Dean feel safe and times where she makes him feel unsafe, and that inconsistency is something a lot of trans folks experience. It's not always as simple as flipping a switch from "adjusting" to "acceptance."
That's also reflected in the relationship Dean has with his parents, specifically his mom. She has a hard time accepting his transness and seeing it as "real." This leads to Dean hiding things from his parents and tip-toeing around them, because he can never gauge whether they're going to be receptive or not. To me, not only is that a realistic reflection of what many trans kids face, but it also acknowledges the essential piece that comes from actually being seen, recognized, and respected as the gender you are—not just as "someone masquerading in different clothes." Gradually, Dean is coming to the realization that he will not minimize or erase parts of himself to make other people comfortable, even people who are as important as his parents. He is learning that he doesn't have to be grateful for scraps of decency, and that he deserves so much more.
Dean is a character who's in a really interesting place where he's questioning and exploring how he wants his own transness to look, which I think is important for young readers to see. Does he want to start wearing a binder? Does he want to go on hormones or not? Does he want to change his pronouns? Does he want to officially "come out" or does he just want to live his life for himself? There's no clear-cut right or wrong answer to any of these questions, and I think the story does a beautiful job of showing the validity of all the possibilities. Whatever Dean decides at the end isn't about what will make him "a more real trans person," but rather what is—or could be—best for him.
In the end, I think this story does a great job of showing how transness is merely a world of possibilities, and we all have to learn how to navigate those possibilities in a way that's true for us. It feels scary not because transness itself is scary, but because we are taught to fear transness and because the world continues to reinforces itself as a frightening, unwelcome, and unsafe place for trans people in so many ways. It seems scary because it's a part of ourselves we are not taught to know or recognize, and because we often lack a clear path forward—not because that path doesn't exist, but because we can't see it. I think this story is invaluable in the way it shows Dean confronting those fears, defining what's true for himself, and learning how to navigate his own path on his own terms.
To say that I recommend this book is an understatement, because it is certainly going to save and change lives.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Bullying, Homophobia, and Transphobia
Moderate: Deadnaming
Minor: Suicide
thedambookshelf's review
challenging
emotional
funny
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
tense
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
⭐️⭐️⭐️/5
Thank you to Netgalley and Amulet Books for the E-ARC of Between Perfect and Real in exchange for an honest review.
Between Perfect and Real is a YA debut about Dean Foster who is a trans boy finding his identity. Dean is a senior in high school who has adopted theater into his bones since he was a kid. Though Dean knows he is trans everyone at school, his girlfriend Zoe, and his theater director think he's a lesbian. Dean struggles with the idea of keeping who he truly is bottled down until college and makes the decision that he doesn't want to hide who he is until then.
This book was a solid three stars and I honestly struggled slightly with determining that rating because I did love this story but it dwindled out for me towards the end.
Dean is a very relatable character and as someone who is genderfluid, I could truly feel the depth of his character and struggle to find his identity and voice. I loved that Dean was written to be very complex and emotional. He felt very fleshed out to me, but his friend group? Not so much.
I loved Zoe, I found her character to be as real as Dean's. Did I enjoy her outing her boyfriend? No. Even so, she was sincere about her mistakes, and given her circumstances, I felt she was very naive, and given the chance to be educated she would have been a better character.
Ronnie was a sweetheart, Allison really irritated me because she just wasn't present much and when she was, I felt as if she was so passive. The support group Dean meets was probably my favorite, though Jade was kind of annoying with all of the negative advice or outcomes Dean could face. Yes, it's realistic that not everything is sunshine and rainbows but personally I didn't feel it was the best solution every time Dean came looking for advice. So that leaves me with how I felt about their blossoming relationship - not a fan.
Blake... that was so confusing. I feel like there was a lot of potential there plot-wise and it just fell off.
I felt the same way with the theater themes as well. We know that theater is a big part of Dean's life but we don't spend a lot of time in the theater or Romeo's role as Dean. I just expected a lot more from that.
Aside from that Dean's journey is fresh and realistic. That's why it's a solid three stars, I just didn't enjoy the ending all that much.
Thank you to Netgalley and Amulet Books for the E-ARC of Between Perfect and Real in exchange for an honest review.
Between Perfect and Real is a YA debut about Dean Foster who is a trans boy finding his identity. Dean is a senior in high school who has adopted theater into his bones since he was a kid. Though Dean knows he is trans everyone at school, his girlfriend Zoe, and his theater director think he's a lesbian. Dean struggles with the idea of keeping who he truly is bottled down until college and makes the decision that he doesn't want to hide who he is until then.
This book was a solid three stars and I honestly struggled slightly with determining that rating because I did love this story but it dwindled out for me towards the end.
Dean is a very relatable character and as someone who is genderfluid, I could truly feel the depth of his character and struggle to find his identity and voice. I loved that Dean was written to be very complex and emotional. He felt very fleshed out to me, but his friend group? Not so much.
I loved Zoe, I found her character to be as real as Dean's. Did I enjoy her outing her boyfriend? No. Even so, she was sincere about her mistakes, and given her circumstances, I felt she was very naive, and given the chance to be educated she would have been a better character.
Ronnie was a sweetheart, Allison really irritated me because she just wasn't present much and when she was, I felt as if she was so passive. The support group Dean meets was probably my favorite, though Jade was kind of annoying with all of the negative advice or outcomes Dean could face. Yes, it's realistic that not everything is sunshine and rainbows but personally I didn't feel it was the best solution every time Dean came looking for advice. So that leaves me with how I felt about their blossoming relationship - not a fan.
Blake... that was so confusing. I feel like there was a lot of potential there plot-wise and it just fell off.
I felt the same way with the theater themes as well. We know that theater is a big part of Dean's life but we don't spend a lot of time in the theater or Romeo's role as Dean. I just expected a lot more from that.
Aside from that Dean's journey is fresh and realistic. That's why it's a solid three stars, I just didn't enjoy the ending all that much.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Body shaming, Bullying, and Deadnaming
Moderate: Biphobia, Emotional abuse, Homophobia, and Suicide
maisierosereads's review
emotional
funny
hopeful
reflective
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
4.0
Between Perfect and Real is such an apt title for this book. It's a wonderfully written contemporary coming-of-age story about Dean Foster, and how starring as Romeo in the school play helps him to come out as trans to his friends, family, and school. I'm certain that many trans and nonbinary people will see themselves reflected in these pages - not just through Dean's narrative, but also through the other trans and nonbinary characters we meet through a support group Dean attends, showing that not all trans and nonbinary people are the same or even have identical experiences. There is other queer representation, too, with a range of sexualities shown across the cast of side characters. There were so many moments in this book which were eerily similar to my own experiences and those of my queer loved ones; it was refreshing, and I'm so glad that queer & trans teenagers will have this book to look to for representation!
The characters were definitely not all perfect, and some of their mistakes were worse than others - the main character included. That being said, most of them were still very much likeable, and showed strong character development.
Ray Stoeve did a great job reflecting common negative experiences such as transphobia and relationship difficulties whilst keeping the overall tone of the book hopeful. I love that they completely avoided using Dean's deadname, and also included educational moments (e.g. unsafe vs safe binding) for readers who may not already have that knowledge. I also really liked the ending, which just like the title and book as a whole had a great balance of realism, optimism, and happiness.
Overall, I highly recommend this book. It's a very impressive YA debut and I can't wait to see what Ray Stoeve will write in the future!
Many thanks to the publisher for giving me access to an eARC through NetGalley so that I could write this review!
The characters were definitely not all perfect, and some of their mistakes were worse than others - the main character included. That being said, most of them were still very much likeable, and showed strong character development.
Ray Stoeve did a great job reflecting common negative experiences such as transphobia and relationship difficulties whilst keeping the overall tone of the book hopeful. I love that they completely avoided using Dean's deadname, and also included educational moments (e.g. unsafe vs safe binding) for readers who may not already have that knowledge. I also really liked the ending, which just like the title and book as a whole had a great balance of realism, optimism, and happiness.
Overall, I highly recommend this book. It's a very impressive YA debut and I can't wait to see what Ray Stoeve will write in the future!
Many thanks to the publisher for giving me access to an eARC through NetGalley so that I could write this review!
Content Warnings
Graphic: Transphobia and Bullying
Moderate: Homophobia and Violence
Minor: Suicide, Deadnaming, and Drug use
utopiastateofmind's review
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
4.25
(Disclaimer: I received this book from Netgalley. This has not impacted my review which is unbiased and honest.)
Between Perfect and Real examines the space between what we expect and reality. The space between our dreams and pedestals and our every day lives and struggles. This book is about bridging that gap. About recognizing the spaces between and how we bring them together. Dean's cast role as Romeo helps give voice and language to a feeling Dean's been struggling with forever. At the same time, it also confronts him with scary questions, coming out, and his girlfriend. Between Perfect and Real was emotional and heart wrenching.
It's tender and explorative as Dean figures out what this means for his life and his future. There are moments of joy as he figures out what his future could hold. Yet at the same time there are real moments of sadness as the future he envisioned crumbles, as he is bullied and as he comes out to his parents. Between Perfect and Real is complex. It celebrates friendships which are supportive, ones that makes mistakes, and everything in between. It features love that hurts, that you want to work out, that fights the writing on the wall.
Between Perfect and Real examines the space between what we expect and reality. The space between our dreams and pedestals and our every day lives and struggles. This book is about bridging that gap. About recognizing the spaces between and how we bring them together. Dean's cast role as Romeo helps give voice and language to a feeling Dean's been struggling with forever. At the same time, it also confronts him with scary questions, coming out, and his girlfriend. Between Perfect and Real was emotional and heart wrenching.
It's tender and explorative as Dean figures out what this means for his life and his future. There are moments of joy as he figures out what his future could hold. Yet at the same time there are real moments of sadness as the future he envisioned crumbles, as he is bullied and as he comes out to his parents. Between Perfect and Real is complex. It celebrates friendships which are supportive, ones that makes mistakes, and everything in between. It features love that hurts, that you want to work out, that fights the writing on the wall.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Transphobia
Moderate: Homophobia and Deadnaming
Minor: Suicide
valereads's review
emotional
hopeful
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
There’s no such thing a perfect – but this book comes pretty darn close.
This novel follows 17 year old trans boy, Dean. When he is cast as the male lead in the school play he begins exploring his gender further and realises he needs to come out and transition. It explores how his relationships with friends, family, his girlfriend and himself change and stay the same as he comes out and begins to socially transition.
This book was beautifully written. At times it felt more like poetry than a prose novel but it was still written in an accessible way. I really enjoyed the experience of reading it.
As a genderqueer trans man myself, I found the descriptions of dysphoria and the experience of being trans really spoke to me. Stoeve managed to capture these feelings in prose in a way that felt genuine and was beautifully written.
If I had any criticisms it’s that some parts were predictable but then again I am a 23 year old man and this is a YA novel so it’s not something that should bother most people. There was also a minor plot point which I thought would come back up but didn’t go anywhere – perhaps I read too much into it.
Overall I absolutely adore this book. A beautifully written novel of a trans guy figuring out who he is and what he needs set to the backdrop of my favourite play, Romeo and Juliet – it’s like it was written for me! I definitely recommend this book to anyone with even the slightest interest, trans or cis, it will not disappoint.
Content warnings: bullying, homophobia, transphobia, misgendering, outing, dysphoria, references to suicide
Content Warnings
Graphic: Bullying, Hate crime, Homophobia, and Transphobia
Moderate: Biphobia, Bullying, Cursing, Deadnaming, Death, Drug use, Hate crime, Homophobia, Panic attacks/disorders, Transphobia, and Violence
Minor: Biphobia, Bullying, Cursing, Deadnaming, Death, Drug use, Hate crime, Homophobia, Suicide, Transphobia, and Violence