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4.12 AVERAGE
4.12 AVERAGE
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Max is a 16 year old boy. He has a great life, great friends, a great family. But Max has a secret, Max is intersex. One night, when his parents are throwing a party, Max is raped by his best friend. Believing its his fault, Max tries to deal with the aftermath on his own.
This book was HEART BREAKING. I loved how informative the book was and how everything was so well explained. I loved the multiple perspective in this! It was so interesting seeing the story told from so many different sides. I loved Max's voice, he is so sweet. Daniel. Max's 9 year old brother, was my absolute favourite part of the story.
Max is a 16 year old boy. He has a great life, great friends, a great family. But Max has a secret, Max is intersex. One night, when his parents are throwing a party, Max is raped by his best friend. Believing its his fault, Max tries to deal with the aftermath on his own.
This book was HEART BREAKING. I loved how informative the book was and how everything was so well explained. I loved the multiple perspective in this! It was so interesting seeing the story told from so many different sides. I loved Max's voice, he is so sweet. Daniel. Max's 9 year old brother, was my absolute favourite part of the story.
emotional
tense
medium-paced
Strong character development:
Complicated
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
I picked this book up specifically because it deals with a boy who is intersex. My knowledge of intersex people is severely lacking, and books with this rep are as well. While overall, I did like this story, I'm not an own voices reviewer, so I cannot genuinely tell you how this portrayal of an intersex person is.
Okay first this book needs a HUGE CONTENT WARNING FOR GRAPHIC SEXUAL ASSAULT! Within the first 5-10%. Like holy shit, I was not prepared at all for this to happen. Rape and sexual assault are not one of my triggers, but holy fuck this scene was so detailed, I was so uncomfortable I debated DNF-ing this book because of it. I felt so much pain for Max during this scene, it was awful. Also, Karen, Max's mother, was pretty awful. She says many transphobic comments and I really hated being in her head. Also is intersexist a word? Is there a word like transphobic that applies specifically to intersex struggles? ( I did a quick google and did not see anything at this time)
Before I talk more about this book, let me define some terms for y'all because I am sure many of you are like wtf is intersex. "Intersex is an umbrella term used to describe a wide range of natural variations that affect genitals, gonads, hormones, chromosomes or reproductive organs. Sometimes these characteristics are visible at birth, sometimes they appear at puberty, and sometimes they are not physically apparent at all." This is from Amnesty international, on their page of intersex awareness day. There are several other outdated terms that have been used to describe intersex people and I will not be using any of them here, many if not all of them are degrading. Some of these terms do show up in this book, which I was not a huge fan of.
Intersex and transgender are separate things. Intersex deals with the actual sex of a person, because surprise sex is NOT binary. And neither is gender. A person can be both intersex and trans, but not all intersex people are trans, and not all trans people are intersex. Also, intersex people are not necessarily non-binary even if they have ambiguous genitalia. Again, gender identity and your physical sex are not the same thing.
Through this story Max is dealing with a lot: from the rape, to trying to understand what being intersex means to him, and navigating high school. A good part of the story deals with Max's burgeoning relationship with a classmate, Sylvie, and his family navigating the aftermath of Max's assault, while his father runs for MP. There was a lot going on in this book. I really loved seeing Max and Sylvie together, also Sylvie is loyal af and she doesn't let the mean girls at school try to spread rumors about Max. It was wonderful. One thing that bothered me though was how Max thought of romance and how tangled it was with having sex. It was excruciatingly aphobic. Listen romance does not equal sex and sex does not equal romance. You don't have to have sex to have a healthy and loving relationship.
I did like the family dynamic in this book, especially Max's father. Oh my god the support and love he has for Max just made me soft and I love him so much. This book has several different POVs and we bounce between Max, his brother, Daniel, the parents, Sylvie, and Max's doctor Archie. I don't know if Daniel was meant to be described with some stereotypical autism markers, but he definitely was and I am very much conflicted because I don't know if it was meant to come across this way and if it's even an accurate portrayal of autism. Or is my brain overthinking this?? Regardless, the bond between Max and Daniel was absolutely precious. Their friendship was the best, and even though they had their issues, the ending made me happy for these two.
This book also deals with pregnancy, abortion and intersex surgeries, but I will be putting my thoughts here in a spoiler.Max becomes pregnant due to his assault, and this is where he meets Archie who ends up helping him sort through some of his confusion around being intersex. His parents never really talked about it, so Max doesn't understand what it means through a good portion of the book. He attempts to use a morning after pill which doesn't work. Then his parents decide for him that he'll get an abortion. And Karen starts going all commando parent and is like Max will also be getting rid of his female genitalia. Seriously, I hate Karen. When Max is finally going into the abortion, which he has agreed to at this point, he starts to panic as the operation begins. He begs his mom non-verbally to stop it. Guess what Karen does? She doesn't stop it. This bitch. She does end up cancelling the following surgeries that would've removed Max's uterus and ovary. Max's dad wasn't there until after the surgery and he is pissed at Karen, and so is Max, rightfully so.
Okay lastly, I want to discuss part of the ending, but it will all be in spoilers because there's no way not to get spoiler-y here. CW: suicide/attempted suicide, sexual assaultNear the end, Max takes a very large dose of pain medication in an attempt to stop feeling, and he overdoses. He was also drunk when he did this, so it was a very tense scene. Right before this, he is cornered by his rapist, Hunter, who kisses him without his consent and tries to coerce Max into having sex with him. If Max had actually died, I would've rated this a 1 star or negative because I'm not here for the bury your intersex (gays) trope and I want queer characters to be happy and have happy endings, especially when they are the main queer character within the story. Max thankfully does not die, and begins going to therapy and talking with his family more.
However, there is also the arrest of Hunter for rape of a minor after Karen comes rushing home after dragging the answer out of Archie (more a non-answer). Karen can't get over the fact her son is gay (which he's not) and never gives Max the space or time to try to tell her he was assaulted. Karen is awful. Max doesn't even tell his parents, Sylvie is there at the time and ends up telling them for him. Look, I'm all for the arrest of rapists, but I didn't really like how it wasn't Max's idea to press charges here. Also Karen was an absentee parent and not listening for a big portion of this book and after this she thinks she can come rushing back to "save" Max? No bitch.
Overall, I loved the characters besides fucking Karen who is awful. And the family bond between Max, Daniel and his dad was lovely. Intersex rep was questionable though and Max's thoughts were sadly very aphobic, sigh.
Okay first this book needs a HUGE CONTENT WARNING FOR GRAPHIC SEXUAL ASSAULT! Within the first 5-10%. Like holy shit, I was not prepared at all for this to happen. Rape and sexual assault are not one of my triggers, but holy fuck this scene was so detailed, I was so uncomfortable I debated DNF-ing this book because of it. I felt so much pain for Max during this scene, it was awful. Also, Karen, Max's mother, was pretty awful. She says many transphobic comments and I really hated being in her head. Also is intersexist a word? Is there a word like transphobic that applies specifically to intersex struggles? ( I did a quick google and did not see anything at this time)
Before I talk more about this book, let me define some terms for y'all because I am sure many of you are like wtf is intersex. "Intersex is an umbrella term used to describe a wide range of natural variations that affect genitals, gonads, hormones, chromosomes or reproductive organs. Sometimes these characteristics are visible at birth, sometimes they appear at puberty, and sometimes they are not physically apparent at all." This is from Amnesty international, on their page of intersex awareness day. There are several other outdated terms that have been used to describe intersex people and I will not be using any of them here, many if not all of them are degrading. Some of these terms do show up in this book, which I was not a huge fan of.
Intersex and transgender are separate things. Intersex deals with the actual sex of a person, because surprise sex is NOT binary. And neither is gender. A person can be both intersex and trans, but not all intersex people are trans, and not all trans people are intersex. Also, intersex people are not necessarily non-binary even if they have ambiguous genitalia. Again, gender identity and your physical sex are not the same thing.
Through this story Max is dealing with a lot: from the rape, to trying to understand what being intersex means to him, and navigating high school. A good part of the story deals with Max's burgeoning relationship with a classmate, Sylvie, and his family navigating the aftermath of Max's assault, while his father runs for MP. There was a lot going on in this book. I really loved seeing Max and Sylvie together, also Sylvie is loyal af and she doesn't let the mean girls at school try to spread rumors about Max. It was wonderful. One thing that bothered me though was how Max thought of romance and how tangled it was with having sex. It was excruciatingly aphobic. Listen romance does not equal sex and sex does not equal romance. You don't have to have sex to have a healthy and loving relationship.
I did like the family dynamic in this book, especially Max's father. Oh my god the support and love he has for Max just made me soft and I love him so much. This book has several different POVs and we bounce between Max, his brother, Daniel, the parents, Sylvie, and Max's doctor Archie. I don't know if Daniel was meant to be described with some stereotypical autism markers, but he definitely was and I am very much conflicted because I don't know if it was meant to come across this way and if it's even an accurate portrayal of autism. Or is my brain overthinking this?? Regardless, the bond between Max and Daniel was absolutely precious. Their friendship was the best, and even though they had their issues, the ending made me happy for these two.
This book also deals with pregnancy, abortion and intersex surgeries, but I will be putting my thoughts here in a spoiler.
Okay lastly, I want to discuss part of the ending, but it will all be in spoilers because there's no way not to get spoiler-y here. CW: suicide/attempted suicide, sexual assault
However, there is also the arrest of Hunter for rape of a minor after Karen comes rushing home after dragging the answer out of Archie (more a non-answer). Karen can't get over the fact her son is gay (which he's not) and never gives Max the space or time to try to tell her he was assaulted. Karen is awful. Max doesn't even tell his parents, Sylvie is there at the time and ends up telling them for him. Look, I'm all for the arrest of rapists, but I didn't really like how it wasn't Max's idea to press charges here. Also Karen was an absentee parent and not listening for a big portion of this book and after this she thinks she can come rushing back to "save" Max? No bitch.
Overall, I loved the characters besides fucking Karen who is awful. And the family bond between Max, Daniel and his dad was lovely. Intersex rep was questionable though and Max's thoughts were sadly very aphobic, sigh.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual content
Moderate: Homophobia, Panic attacks/disorders, Suicidal thoughts, Toxic relationship, Transphobia
Forced abortion
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
fast-paced
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
Very interesting description of modern teenage life outside gender norms. The introspective pieces are well done, with Max's chapters - and particularly his reflections on his future and the consequences of his identity - as standout. The mother, Karen, drove me a little nuts and almost had me put the book down at one point, but her motivations are eventually fleshed out and you can regain some empathy for her.
The chapters alternate character narrators and readers - the full cast recording is very well done and very much enhanced my experience.
The chapters alternate character narrators and readers - the full cast recording is very well done and very much enhanced my experience.
Another 3.5, but I feel like I say that about every book lately, and this one was better than those. :) I wish I had known what it was about before I started reading; I just wasn't prepared for the first 30 pages. But did you know this author is only 25 years old? Woah! I would recommend this book as long as you can handle "heavy."
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
informative
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
Book CW: hard cw on rape (lengthy description), transphobia, homophobia
This was a very heavy book. I wasn’t prepared for the rape scene, which took forever and was painfully detailed, and which almost made me sick. Later, the mother’s controlling behavior and the fact that she kept ignoring her child in decisions concerning his body drove me absolutely mad. In general, all the scenes where adults were trying to take decisions for Max angered me, and I had to put the book down to breathe a few times. But despite those very negative emotions, I loved the book. I loved how Max’s struggle about his gender identity was depicted, and how it resolved. I loved how, despite him being paralyzed by fear and controlled by others most of the time, he still managed to ask himself so many important questions. I love how after all these awful things happening to him he got a happy ending.
This was a very heavy book. I wasn’t prepared for the rape scene, which took forever and was painfully detailed, and which almost made me sick. Later, the mother’s controlling behavior and the fact that she kept ignoring her child in decisions concerning his body drove me absolutely mad. In general, all the scenes where adults were trying to take decisions for Max angered me, and I had to put the book down to breathe a few times. But despite those very negative emotions, I loved the book. I loved how Max’s struggle about his gender identity was depicted, and how it resolved. I loved how, despite him being paralyzed by fear and controlled by others most of the time, he still managed to ask himself so many important questions. I love how after all these awful things happening to him he got a happy ending.
Hmm. There's a lot to say about this book. I make the following comments as a queer, non-intersex-identified person. I read this book with my guard up, expecting a mainstream and thus highly problematic account of someone with an intersex condition. It is certainly the former. Fortunately, gender identity, gender fluidity and some aspects intersex are quite well handled by the author. The story is told by multiple narrators, including Max, the novel's protagonist. In many ways, this is a book about coming to an "alternative" gender identity and sense of self in an unqueer world (highschool and home in a small, posh town in the English countryside). Max defies the prejudiced beliefs of the adults in his life, who feel strongly that he needs to choose a normative gender identity and undergo medical treatment to "normalize" his body; multiple doctors tell Max how rare intersex conditions are - some call it an illness. Then, late in the book, Max, his girlfriend and his younger brother do their own research and realize that Max is far, far from alone. There's a particularly beautiful passage when he reads the "How Common is Intersex?" section from the Intersex Society of North America's website: "To answer this question in an uncontroversial way, you’d have to first get everyone to agree on what counts as intersex — and also to agree on what should count as strictly male or strictly female." There are some tender, powerful moments of allyship and solidarity, of grief and healing, of coming to agency, autonomy, and a fluid understanding of gender, in the face of trauma and oppression.
All that said, this book is extremely limited by the author's lack of feminist analysis. In developing a narrative that ultimately empowers Max, the author scapegoats women all over the place: from the "bitchy" girls he goes to school with to sex workers to Max's mother (who, fortunately, is given some nuance near the end of the book). It's sad that the author just totally misses patriarchy and its overarching effect on gender-based oppression. Obviously, I also wonder at the author's relationship to intersexuality. This seems to be a book written by a non-intersex person for non-intersex folks, and - because they're not very clearly stated in the acknowledgements - I'm not sure of the author's intentions or exactly how she went about her research.
It's tricky. This is a gripping, pretty well written story that really does a nice job of presenting nuanced and fluid relationships to gender identity, and the ways in which the gender binary is violently enforced and managed, to a mainstream audience - but it ultimately lacks a queer and feminist politic. I think it does more good than harm, but I don't think it's all good.
Finally, folks should be aware that there is a graphic description of a sexual assault in the opening pages of the book, and sections throughout the book may be triggering and overwhelming to read.
All that said, this book is extremely limited by the author's lack of feminist analysis. In developing a narrative that ultimately empowers Max, the author scapegoats women all over the place: from the "bitchy" girls he goes to school with to sex workers to Max's mother (who, fortunately, is given some nuance near the end of the book). It's sad that the author just totally misses patriarchy and its overarching effect on gender-based oppression. Obviously, I also wonder at the author's relationship to intersexuality. This seems to be a book written by a non-intersex person for non-intersex folks, and - because they're not very clearly stated in the acknowledgements - I'm not sure of the author's intentions or exactly how she went about her research.
It's tricky. This is a gripping, pretty well written story that really does a nice job of presenting nuanced and fluid relationships to gender identity, and the ways in which the gender binary is violently enforced and managed, to a mainstream audience - but it ultimately lacks a queer and feminist politic. I think it does more good than harm, but I don't think it's all good.
Finally, folks should be aware that there is a graphic description of a sexual assault in the opening pages of the book, and sections throughout the book may be triggering and overwhelming to read.
Great subject for a book! In places this book was poorly written with poor charactorisation. Probably aimed more at the teenage market. Overall, I am glad that I read it. Terrific story.