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This had some really interesting themes and nuanced young characters who are struggling to make the right decisions. Miles and his parents remind me a little bit of of May the Best Man Win by ZR Ellor. In that book, Jeremy's mother is a independent professional woman who champions feminism and liberal ideals but struggles to connect those to her now transitioning son.

In this book, its the father who champions feminism and loved having a daughter to support but now doesn't know how to communicate with a son, even if he is fundamentally the same child. Miles's mom is perfectly accepting and supportive of his gender transition but can't accept his new found sexuality as gay. Both of his parents love him but they struggle to accept his new identities because they don't align with what they expected their child to be like. This tension made for an interesting dynamic between Miles and each of his parents and, like in May The Best Man Win, illustrates how even the most liberal and supportive parents often do fail to apply their general beliefs of equality and acceptance to their own children.

Eric is a really great character. He's sweet and provides a quiet, calm acceptance of Miles's identity so he makes a great emotional rock for Miles. He had one line that really cracked me up laughing: "You're the one who sat in my lap Miles". It was so funny because it was early on in their relationship so it was the first time we saw his sassy or playful behavior. He has his own struggles with being bisexual/pansexual (I can't remember which was used) and I think it was handled in a really authentic but was to digest and still fun to read about way. His sister Nina has down syndrome and it was nice rep. She isn't a focal point and her down syndrome isn't a plot point but its mentioned and her needs are discussed often. Plus she's just a cute character.

There are a few things that bothered me. 1) The first 40% is so slow I almost dnf'ed multiple times. 2)

Miles cheats on Eric with his ex Shane by kissing Shane but its never called cheating. It is cheating no matter the reason and it concerns me that the author didn't feel the need to make that clear. When one of Mile's friends cheats on her girlfriend, its very clearly called out as cheating and as being bad and harmful but Miles gets away with it not being called cheating.

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novella42's review against another edition

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emotional hopeful inspiring fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

Always the Almost was a contemporary fiction romantic drama about a trans boy (he/him) who loves piano and has just recently come out of the closet, only to be dumped by his boyfriend. This is a lighthearted and emotional coming of age story that doubles as a gorgeous love letter to classical piano music.

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lilythebibliophile's review against another edition

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hopeful medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

2.75

2.75 stars

Reviewing this book is tough, because:

♢ Did this book have authentic queer and trans rep? Yes.

♢ Was the representation joyful, hopeful, and supported by other characters in the story? Yes.

♢ Do I think queer and trans readers will feel seen and safe reading this story? Yes.

♢ Is there a dearth of these kinds of books in the publishing industry? Yes.

However, I have two critiques:

♢ The cheating present in this story is not handled well. To me, if you cheat on your partner even once, you are a cheater for the rest of your life. Period. You can never go back to being a person who stays faithful to their partner. Cheating on your partner means crossing this huge moral boundary you can never un-cross.

Yet in this story, cheating is framed as a useful tool to help characters figure out what they really want. And the characters who cheat don't face proper consequences. What message is this giving younger teen readers?

And when I say the characters don't face proper consequences, I mean one character barely has to grovel before their partner takes them back. Even if the cheater had groveled more, their partner was too good for them in the first place. It seemed like their partner was more apologetic than the cheater was at the end of the story.

♢ During the emotional climax of the story, Miles blows up at almost everyone in his life on separate occasions. He tells his one friend "fuck you" and that she's being hysterical, he yells at his piano teacher, and he has an outburst when he's on the phone with his other friend. I am a teenager, and I'm about the same age as Miles. I have never and would never blow up at my friends like that, let alone at a teacher who's trying to help me?

Being a teenager with life problems is not an excuse to throw temper tantrums. These actions are indicative of a behavioral problem, yet they are normalized and forgiven almost instantly.

I understand the need for queer and trans rep where the characters aren't "model queer people" or "model trans people," where they make mistakes and have relationship problems. Yet I've never read another YA book (queer, trans, or otherwise) where the main character behaved so poorly and where their actions were normalized and excused almost instantly.

♢ The cheating did provide much-needed conflict to the story, but is that really an excuse? It's one thing if

Miles pushed Shane away almost instantly, but Eric didn't see that, so he thought Miles cheated. But Miles leaned in to kiss Shane back! Plus, Paige and Josie's situation makes it clear the author doesn't think cheating is a big deal.

♢ This book is better-written than the other Wednesday Books rom-com I read this month, but I am truly shocked at the actions of these characters and how they are portrayed.

♢ I liked the piano aspect of the plot. It was unique and meaningful.

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3.5

"Finding yourself, in spite of everyone else."

Thank you to Wednesday Books for providing me with an eARC via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review!

I loved a lot of things about this book, but I think what gets me the most is how YA it feels. I love a lot of things about queer YA: the messy characters, self-discovery, understanding of others, the unparalleled feeling of joy. But I think the true heart of why it means so much and why it is a genre that feels like home is that queer YA authors pour so much love into their books. And that is certainly true for Always the Almost.

So, what's it about? Always the Almost follows Miles, a pianist who's just come out as a trans guy to his friends and family. When New Year's comes around, he finds himself missing his ex-boyfriend, who broke up with Miles after he came out. Logically, as any (un)reasonable teenager would, Miles makes a resolution to win his ex back. He also decides that this year will be the time he beats his insufferable piano rival. Then when Miles comes back to school following winter break, he meets the new kid in town, Eric. Eric is everything Shane (the ex) was not. He's comfortably queer, understanding, intuitive, and cute in an entirely different way. He makes Miles feel things.

Always the Almost is a story about all those typical queer YA feelings; it's about feeling as if everything you do almost enough, but not quite there — like you can never truly be yourself. And while I am not trans myself, just this base feeling of always having to reach farther is something I can painfully relate to. And it also really warms my heart to think about all the trans kids who might pick up this book and see themselves in it — who might relate to Miles even more than I did.

I loved the progression of Miles' music throughout the book. I honestly felt Miles rise up to the challenge, and struggle to find himself in his piano playing. I loved watching his understanding and self-discovery influence his passion. It's such a real, beautiful thing to let your personality seep into your hobbies and passions.

I absolutely adored Eric. He was so understanding and caring, and he always knew what to say — or at least he always clarified. I loved his development as the love interest and supporting character for Miles' journey. Although I gotta say that I was not a big fan of Miles' friends. Maybe they reminded me too much of people I know in real life, or maybe they were just simply a lil too messy for even my messy heart. But I did really appreciate their respective life experiences and character arcs. They felt real, and they weren't perfect, but I could tell they cared. Maybe they weren't always the best friends to Miles, but we've all got our own problems to deal with.

And Miles. Oh, Miles. He made so many mistakes. Like, mistakes that I saw coming chapters ahead and wanted to just grip him by the shoulders and yell at him for. But that's kinda why I'm reading, isn't it? To see him mess up and come back from it. To see the "epic highs and lows" of... piano?? competitions??? (ok sorry, I'll stop now) But anyway I really liked him as a person and a protagonist, messy in everything he is.

Always the Almost is so joyful. It's a story of a gay trans guy. A story of a piano player. A story of a true teenager. It's a story about messing up and finding love and messing up again and coming back and doing it again, and again, and again. It's a story about understanding others as well as yourself. It's a warm hug to queer YA as a genre, and a read to make you smile. It's happiness in the face of darker moments. It's joy.

Content Warnings: transphobia, deadnaming, homophobia, bullying, mentions of racism, infidelity (kiss), gender dysphoria

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emotional funny hopeful inspiring lighthearted reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

Miles Jacobson has two goals this New Year: 1. Get back with his ex-boyfriend 2. Finally beat his rival at the Midwest's biggest piano competition. But when he gets close to Eric Mendez, a new student from Seattle, who is all soft around the edges and asks his pronouns he questions all he knows about love. Not only that, but his new piano instructor has him question all he knew about piano as well. This new year might not go the way he expected.

When I first read the summary of this book I thought, this is not my favorite trope but something about these characters was calling me. The whole trope of trying to get back with an ex who obviously does not want to is oftentimes a pet peeve of mine. At points, it was true here as well, however, I found myself loving both Miles and Eric too much. Yeah, was Miles a bellend at times and I wanted to put some sense on that head of his? Sure, but that has been true for most of my friends at some point.

And honestly, that felt refreshing. Miles is not perfect and he is not meant to be perfect. He is a teenager who has recently come out of the closet and is trying to live his life authentically as a trans man. All while practicing for one of the biggest piano competitions and dealing with the usual teen angst. Of course the man would not have everything figured out.

What matters is that he grows from this and he does. He becomes a better pianist, a better person, and overall, secure in his own skin. Just as the author promises in the first author’s note, this is a story filled with queer joy, trans joy. And he truly delivered, because this book filled me with so much joy.

Overall, the whole thing with Miles and his ex drew back the story a bit for me and it’s the main reason why I am not rating this higher, however, it didn’t stop me from enjoying and loving everything else. If you can get past it just like I did I seriously recommend this book. It’s so sweet and Eric is an absolute angel. He is the best character along with Stefania (Miles’ new piano instructor) and I adore them for different reasons. Pick this up if you want some trans joy in your life.

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dogoodwithbooks's review against another edition

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emotional hopeful inspiring medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

I would like to thank NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press for providing me with a free e-ARC of this book in exchange for a fair and honest review.

Miles Jacobsen finds himself on New Year’s with two things in mind: finally winning the Tri-State Piano Competition and getting back together with his ex-boyfriend, Shane. Then comes in Eric Mendez, who seems to really like Miles for who he is. After a friendship turns into something more after a Valentine’s Day couples party, Miles finds himself wondering

Always the Almost is a book full of joy. Underhill’s writing definitely translates to such beautiful imagery of everything from piano to finding yourself to falling in love. While this book deals with darker topics and not everything is sunshine and rainbows, I think that Underhill really does a great job with illustrating queer joy shown in Miles’ and Eric’s character development.

Miles and Eric’s relationship, for me, was really the star of the show. From the moment you see Miles and Eric first meeting each other, I knew that Eric was perfect for Miles. The way he genuinely cares about Miles throughout the book is prominent and really allows for Miles to grow in finding himself. I really felt for these characters and I continually kept rooting for them throughout the book.

I cannot wait for people to read Always the Almost next year. If you are looking for a heartfelt YA novel about falling in love while finding yourself, you are going to love Always the Almost.

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raichou's review against another edition

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emotional fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

I was so excited for this book when I read the synopsis, but was a bit disappointed by some of the things that happened.

First I have to say, Eric is a sweetheart and I would protect him with my life! He is such a lovely character.
Miles on the other hand is a bit all over. I know he is still trying to figure stuff out with his ex, but he shouldn't have done it in the way that he did. At some points he really was as empathetic as a wet sock.
For the same reason I was so disappointed in Paige. Like what was the reason? There were so many better ways than to do what she did.

All in all it was sweet story, but I got a bit too annoyed with some of the characters to really enjoy it.

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evelynyle_88's review against another edition

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emotional lighthearted medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Plot
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

Huft.. finally I managed myself to finish this book. Personally, to me... this book is so good and wholesome. But, there's something why I can't give Always The Almost a full five stars because of the triggers and the contents; somehow got me and triggered me so much; made me so slow in the process of reading this book.

The conflicts in this book are somehow also frustrating (don't judge me because this is my opinion). But, as a whole story, I'm not hating it because it still have its cute yet wholesome factor. Just sometimes... to put how the MC makes you want to smack their heads with something because you see the worst decision they made.. it was upsetting me. Thank God the ending is sweet and do its justice.

Thank you, Edward for an awesome story you told through Miles Jacobson and Eric Mendez. Also... can't wait for your next book! This Day Changes Everything, let's go!

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