Reviews tagging 'Toxic relationship'

Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life by Emily Nagoski

8 reviews

takarakei's review against another edition

informative medium-paced

4.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Sexism, Sexual content, and Misogyny

Moderate: Sexual violence, Sexual assault, Mental illness, Body shaming, Rape, Animal cruelty, Gaslighting, and Fatphobia

Minor: Ableism, Toxic relationship, and Pregnancy

Unfortunately a lot of modern science is based on animal testing/experiments, some of which are described in this book

riverofhorton's review against another edition

challenging funny hopeful informative inspiring reflective slow-paced

3.75

So much of this book is useful... To someone else.

I found I didn't learn a vast amount from this book, and the bits I did learn gave me more of a "Huh, so that answers this personal trauma question", rather than increasing my understanding of sexuality in general.

So many times the book says something, then it'll say "More on that in chapter x." or "Remember this from chapter y?" and it just served as a jolt in the flow.

One of the things I didn't like, and feel I need to mention: This book uses gender where it should be using sex, and woman where it should be using AFAB, etc. I understand that this was likely done to avoid confusing sex the action with sex the characteristic, but it's the kind of thing that I can see affecting other trans masc people more than I. Using gender (and woman) implies that this book would not apply to trans guys, because gender, but it does apply to us (without surgical intervention) because sex.

It does also seem to portray "Don't want/enjoy sex, that's OKay, change the context and you will." Which skirts a little too close to being Acephobic for my comfort. Some people just aren't interested in sex, and that's OKay.

The basic sum, is that this seems to very much be aimed at the cis woman in a heterosexual monogamous relationship seeking to understand her body and sexuality. Which is great for the cishet woman in a mono relationship. And while there are bits that can be applied to folx that don't fit those categories, the lack of inclusive language is noticeable.

Overall, I can see why this book is so popular, and I will be recommending it to others, with the above caveat as needed, but I just didn't get much out of it that I couldn't have got from trauma therapy.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Pregnancy, Sexual harassment, Body shaming, Bullying, Chronic illness, Sexual content, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Domestic abuse, Dysphoria, Emotional abuse, Infertility, Mental illness, Misogyny, Injury/Injury detail, Panic attacks/disorders, Medical trauma, Physical abuse, Stalking, Toxic relationship, Transphobia, Violence, Child abuse, Grief, Medical content, Abortion, Eating disorder, Infidelity, Rape, Self harm, Sexism, Acephobia/Arophobia, and Biphobia

blubbi's review

emotional informative inspiring lighthearted reflective medium-paced

3.75

I think pretty much everyone benefits from reading this book. But I think it could've been shorter, at some point it felt very repetitive.

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Toxic relationship, Rape, and Eating disorder

mlkai's review against another edition

hopeful informative reflective medium-paced

4.0

easy to read women’s sexuality. definitely keeping some of her points in my brain for awhile. 

pt 1 was my favorite. kind of wish the rest has been truncated but that’s ok. 

i liked the stories of the four women. but i often couldnt keep track of who was who or what happened in the story previously. also could not for the life of my remember the different between liking wanting and learning which made her later references frustrating bc i didn’t fully get them. 

nitpick/formatting thing: the fact that she didn’t use chicago style annotations drove me BONKERS bc i constantly had to go to the end of the book (only to often see it was just a citation w/o commentary —- i created a system quickly but still annoyed me enough to mention in an online review very few ppl will read 😂)

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Sexual violence and Body shaming

Minor: Stalking and Toxic relationship

karyan1's review against another edition

challenging informative reflective medium-paced

3.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Sexual content

Minor: Body shaming, Sexual violence, Rape, Sexual assault, Mental illness, Sexual harassment, Stalking, and Toxic relationship

kc__'s review

challenging hopeful informative inspiring slow-paced

5.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Medical content and Sexual content

Minor: Toxic relationship, Sexual harassment, Sexual violence, Sexual assault, and Rape

toberomanced's review

emotional funny informative inspiring reflective medium-paced

5.0

This book should be required reading for all vulva owners and their partners. It redefines sex and confronts the societal pressures and falsehoods that are heaped upon us every day. Not only does it discuss the acts of sex itself, but it dives deep into the psychology of self-criticism, trauma, and doubt. 

The takeaway from this book is simple: You are normal.

If you've ever felt broken, unworthy, or unloveable, I strongly urge you to pick up this book. It is both funny and powerful.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Sexual content

Moderate: Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Sexism, Body shaming, Emotional abuse, Misogyny, Rape, and Toxic relationship

clovelatte's review

funny informative medium-paced

5.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Body shaming, Misogyny, Mental illness, Physical abuse, Sexism, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Stalking, and Toxic relationship