Reviews tagging 'Death'

Refusing Compulsory Sexuality: A Black Asexual Lens on Our Sex-Obsessed Culture by Sherronda J. Brown

2 reviews

workingdaley's review against another edition

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challenging hopeful informative reflective slow-paced

5.0

I feel like this is a deeply important read for every queer person, especially Black asexuals. It's deeply important for us to be able to understand asexuality in general, as it's a very misunderstood orientation, but I feel it's especially important to understand asexuality through a Black lens. This book managed to not only speak to some of the thoughts about my asexuality as a Black person that I was only partially able to articulate before reading this, but also speaks a lot to my disconnect with gender and my disconnect with the "human experience" as someone who is Black, asexual, aromantic, agender, and autistic. It also manages to speak to my frustrations with the realization that I've fallen out of the chrononormative structure that's been set out for me. And while my hesitations around marriage and children were going to cause this for me eventually, having it happen so early in my life forces me to really reflect on why life is structured in the way that it is, and what it means for me and my future that I've decidedly fallen off of my pre-determined path. This book has also given me tools to help better navigate consent and trying to work towards a world where we can break free of the allonormative assumption that we should all be desiring sex, and the racist assumption that as a Black person, I am always consenting to sex by my mere existence. I cannot recommend this book to enough people. I really do think that our understanding of queerness is improved when we can acknowledge and analyze the Black asexual lens.
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jayisreading's review against another edition

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informative reflective medium-paced

4.75

This was a compelling read, giving a lot of food for thought to the reader. I thought Brown did a wonderful job addressing the rampant acephobic narratives that exist outside but also within the queer community. What makes this particular book stand out to me compared to other essays and writings about asexuality is the way Brown approached it from a Black perspective, reaffirming the importance of intersectionality. They critically reflect on what it means to be a Black asexual, and how the treatment of asexuals and Black people have overlaps.

Brown brings in academic sources in their discussion on asexuality, but also turns to lived experiences to assert why it’s so important to highlight the asexual experience (especially as a queer one). Acknowledging and uplifting asexual voices is more than just accepting that there are some people who have little to no sexual attraction. It’s clear that, through an asexual lens, especially a Black asexual lens, a lot of reflection needs to be done.

I did find the book a little repetitive after the first few chapters, but for those who have little to no familiarity with asexuality (and, relatedly, aromanticism), I would absolutely recommend this book as your starting point.
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