Reviews

Quite possibly the worst book I have ever read. It has nothing to say, it was boring for 90% of it, the (shoddy attempt at) world-building is meh, just a bunch of ideas haphazardly stitched together with no rhymes or reasons in hope of creating something interesting. There's no "structured" feel to the world. The temple of the Black Friars, the Earl's Court, the Beast's labyrinth might as well be from different worlds altogether. It's like Neil pulled a bunch of random set pieces from different films, placed them next to each other and called it a day.

The characters are all boring, which is about the worst sin fictional characters could commit. I don't care about a single one of them. Richard started out interesting at how he stood up against Jessica's orders, but for the rest of the story he never showed any other qualities other than "he's kinda nice". Door gets a point for being so aptly named - she has the personality of a door! For the matter, all characters can be summarized by a single trope. There's nothing wrong with using trope, but you can't make your character the embodiment of a single trope, with no further attempt to flesh them out, or subvert the trope in anyway.

This book commits another grave sin, which is being structured like a Hollywood movie. Every single scene, every single scene cut is structured like a movie. I know this book started out as the movie, but you are writing a book now, Neil! Besides, the plot, as a consequence of having to accomodate boring characters who did nothing to advance it, had to advance itself by using contrivances and deus-ex-machina (

the Marquis tripped and dropped the statue, seriously?

), all the while managed to somehow be predictable at the same time. I lol-ed at the attempt of creating suspense in chapter 12 where Richard was about to

face a supposedly very dangerous Ordeal, and the Marquis was seemingly dead

. Neil dragged on and on and on about how

Richard was totally in terrible danger, guys, and the Marquis was totally gonna die for sure, guys. When we, as the audience, already knew Richard is the main character and thus will have his underdog story, while the Marquis, having had an entire scene dedicated to him entrusting some kind of insurance to Old Bailey at the beginning of the book, is not gonna die in any meaningful way

. It's like Neil doesn't respect the audience's intelligence.

There is also no emotional depth to the book. This is probably why it felt so much like a movie. The

Ordeal of the Key

was about the most "emotionally deep" the book got, and thus probably made the most interesting chapter. However since the rest of the book didn't get the same treatment, it felt out of place and unconvincing.

So the world-building is incoherent, the characters are boring and one-dimensional, the plot is predictable, what's the value of this book? Nothing. That's what. I would have given this 1 star if not for How the Marquis Got His Coat Back. 20 years did wonder to Neil's writing. This little short story has more interesting world building, more emotional depth, better characters than the rest of the novel.

meegmog's review against another edition

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adventurous dark mysterious medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.25

frankikaos's review against another edition

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5.0

I've never read Neil Gaiman before but now I will be seeking out his other works because I got emotionally invested in this book that I didn't want it to end.

stormcatt's review against another edition

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5.0

A grown up Alice in Wonderland.

jessielinden1's review against another edition

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4.0

I loved this book! I adore the British humor in it and the vivid imagery. Saw someone else note something so poignant and worked beautifully as connective tissue: characters at seemingly opposite ends of good and evil want the same thing, which is to return to where they feel they belong. I loved the ending. I just adored the whole thing.

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