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4.0 AVERAGE
4.0 AVERAGE
I was really impressed with her first book but found this one disappointing. Kate Mulgrew is an excellent actress and a very good writer and entertainer but comes across as unfortunately self-absorbed and almost narcissistic in this book. Obviously, this is a memoir and she's writing from her own point of view and through her own experiences, but I felt that she took some liberties in the storytelling that could not enable me to really trust her as a narrator (some stories she claims to have 'imagined' - otherwise known as made up - but are told with such detail that I felt that she was trying to trick the reader into thinking they were real). Most of her siblings seemed to have stayed closer to the hometown than she did but they barely got a mention in the first half of the book. Clearly she came home a fair bit, but I don't think the brothers and sisters really got the acknowledgment for the care of their parents that they probably deserved. Chapters would go by without them getting a mention and you wouldn't be blamed for forgetting they existed at all and believe that Kate exclusively took care of her parents (at least her father - they do get more screen time in the second half about her mother) in their old age. One of the most telling parts of the story was where she described how she got her mother to appoint her as the person who would make the decisions about her care with no discussion with the rest of the family, including her father who would have been the natural choice for this role. Pretty sneaky on her part and to her credit (I think?!) she doesn't really try to hide this underhandedness. The second part of the book was better than the first, mostly because her mother seemed to be so much more of a personality (though she wasn't going to be winning any Mother-of-the-Year awards) and her decline in her final years was all the more tragic but would have been more poignant if by this point I wasn't so mistrusting of the person telling the story. Also, it often felt like she was being unnecessarily wordy or using big words just to show off her vocabulary and to make the reader feel a bit stupid in comparison. I wanted to enjoy this book but didn't. Not because it was extremely depressing (it was) but because it tarnished my admiration of a personality I had great respect for. In short, I liked Kate Mugrew a lot before reading her book and I liked her a lot less afterwards. I doubt this was her intention.
emotional
funny
hopeful
reflective
sad
medium-paced
Like her first memoir, this book showcases Kate Milgrew's incredible storytelling ability. With rich pride and vivid descriptions, the stories and characters come alive.
I confess I was somewhat off put this time by what felt like a caricature of her maid/Nanny. The audiobook version included the author's attempt at a Mexican accent with broken English. Perhaps it was exactly how Lucy sounds, but it felt cheap and unfair.
The first half of the book flew by, the story of her father's life was captivating. Her mother's story was also captivating, until the end when it not only began to drag out, it also felt voyeuristic. Being repeatedly told about times this woman peed herself or mistook her son for Jesus felt like I was seeing a side of her life she would want no one to see. And the book lingered on it for too long.
Still, it was a poignant look at the lingering loss of a parent with Alzheimer's, beautiful told by a gifted writer.
I confess I was somewhat off put this time by what felt like a caricature of her maid/Nanny. The audiobook version included the author's attempt at a Mexican accent with broken English. Perhaps it was exactly how Lucy sounds, but it felt cheap and unfair.
The first half of the book flew by, the story of her father's life was captivating. Her mother's story was also captivating, until the end when it not only began to drag out, it also felt voyeuristic. Being repeatedly told about times this woman peed herself or mistook her son for Jesus felt like I was seeing a side of her life she would want no one to see. And the book lingered on it for too long.
Still, it was a poignant look at the lingering loss of a parent with Alzheimer's, beautiful told by a gifted writer.
I laughed, I cried, I outright sobbed. Great book!
emotional
inspiring
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medium-paced
This is a Heartbreaking and inspirational memoir. Written by the actress Kate Mulgrew it is part autobiography and a tribute to her parents. When her father is diagnosed with cancer and her mother with Alzheimer's she returns home to spend time with them. The book is beautifully written.
emotional
funny
inspiring
reflective
sad
medium-paced
emotional
hopeful
informative
reflective
sad
slow-paced
Great honest portrayal of the ravages of Alzheimer’s and cancer. Her family is complicated and there are some really not great stories about them that are heartbreaking to read. How her and her siblings all dealt with the painful loss of their parents in their own way. Very well written.
I have read Kate Mulgrew's premiere memoir, "Born With Teeth" roughly five times and I had recently read it in April. When 'How To Forget' was announced and that it was about Mulgrew's relationship with her parents, I was instantly intrigued. I have been following Mulgrew's career for close to twenty years and I have heard a myriad of stories about her parents, her upbringing, her siblings and her mother's battle with Alzheimer's Disease. Where 'Born With Teeth' barely touched about that disease, I was interested to see how 'How To Forget' would expand upon it.
Mulgrew has an undeniable gift with words. She is fiercely articulate and I always find myself needing a dictionary close-to-hand when reading anything by her. In 'How To Forget,' I found myself being witness to my own thoughts appearing on a page written by someone that I have admired for two-thirds of my life. That surprised me and took me aback. I found myself being witness to a new and heartbreakingly vulnerable side to Mulgrew. She does not try to hide how her parents' illnesses and deaths broke her heart and broke the hearts of her siblings. She is able to articulate with such skill something that I didn't know that I had felt and did not know how to verbalise when I watched my own father pass away from a terminal disease. This book truly struck a chord with me. I annotated this book as I read and I am so glad that I did because it helped me to absorb it and make peace with my own frustrations and pains. It is unwaveringly honest, heartbreaking, poignant and in places, wickedly hilarious. Kate Mulgrew's strength throughout this book is truly inspiring. She has never painted herself as a saint in either of her memoirs. She gives over to the reader a very personal, subjective and vulnerable narrative and you can tell that she needed to get this off of her chest. There were moments when I wanted to reach for the tissues and that I simply wanted to give her the biggest hug imaginable.
Even if you are not a fan of Kate Mulgrew or have been a fan for years, I would highly recommend this book. For someone that has lost a parent to a degenerative and wasting disease, Mulgrew's words made an impact that I will never forget and will find difficult to describe.
Mulgrew has an undeniable gift with words. She is fiercely articulate and I always find myself needing a dictionary close-to-hand when reading anything by her. In 'How To Forget,' I found myself being witness to my own thoughts appearing on a page written by someone that I have admired for two-thirds of my life. That surprised me and took me aback. I found myself being witness to a new and heartbreakingly vulnerable side to Mulgrew. She does not try to hide how her parents' illnesses and deaths broke her heart and broke the hearts of her siblings. She is able to articulate with such skill something that I didn't know that I had felt and did not know how to verbalise when I watched my own father pass away from a terminal disease. This book truly struck a chord with me. I annotated this book as I read and I am so glad that I did because it helped me to absorb it and make peace with my own frustrations and pains. It is unwaveringly honest, heartbreaking, poignant and in places, wickedly hilarious. Kate Mulgrew's strength throughout this book is truly inspiring. She has never painted herself as a saint in either of her memoirs. She gives over to the reader a very personal, subjective and vulnerable narrative and you can tell that she needed to get this off of her chest. There were moments when I wanted to reach for the tissues and that I simply wanted to give her the biggest hug imaginable.
Even if you are not a fan of Kate Mulgrew or have been a fan for years, I would highly recommend this book. For someone that has lost a parent to a degenerative and wasting disease, Mulgrew's words made an impact that I will never forget and will find difficult to describe.
Moving story but at times it feels like she uses the most complicated language possible to convey simple thoughts. It was a struggle to get through it because I kept getting distracted by the words used rather than the sentiment. Born with Teeth was a much better memoir in my humble opinion.
It is a really sad memoir. How do we care our aging parents? Especially those with chronic diseases. A miss lion dollar question.
emotional
funny
reflective
sad
medium-paced