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5 reviews for:
The Introvert and Extrovert in Love: Making It Work When Opposites Attract
Michael L. Laney, Marti Olsen Laney
3.04 AVERAGE
5 reviews for:
The Introvert and Extrovert in Love: Making It Work When Opposites Attract
Michael L. Laney, Marti Olsen Laney
3.04 AVERAGE
I first came across this book on Amazon when it began to come clear to me over the summer that I was dating an extrovert (how did that happen!?). Upon discovering this, I was overcome with a sense of doom--it would never work!! So I did a Google search on extrovert-introvert relationships and realized I wasn't alone. When I said yes to marrying an extrovert, I decided it was time to read this book.
It's a quick, easy read, and although it's set up like a relationship self-help book, its greatest strength comes from its accessible explanation of how the introvert/extrovert processes information, laying out temperament differences as something permanent (with a bit of malleability) and not something that should be changed, resented, or taken personally. Just knowing that is enough to smooth over minor bumps in introvert-extrovert interactions, so the actual "tips" for such interactions felt a little condescending. At the same time, I do appreciate that the authors took theoretical information and outlined some concrete ways to use it.
This book may have tried to do a bit too much; it seems almost laughable to have just a few sections about raising kids together as an innie/outie couple when hundreds of books exist to try to untangle the mystery of parenting. Still, this serves as a good introduction that can lay some nice groundwork for increased acceptance of both oneself and one's partner, and there are other books to pursue if you're interested in going deeper into any specific aspect of your relationship.
It's a quick, easy read, and although it's set up like a relationship self-help book, its greatest strength comes from its accessible explanation of how the introvert/extrovert processes information, laying out temperament differences as something permanent (with a bit of malleability) and not something that should be changed, resented, or taken personally. Just knowing that is enough to smooth over minor bumps in introvert-extrovert interactions, so the actual "tips" for such interactions felt a little condescending. At the same time, I do appreciate that the authors took theoretical information and outlined some concrete ways to use it.
This book may have tried to do a bit too much; it seems almost laughable to have just a few sections about raising kids together as an innie/outie couple when hundreds of books exist to try to untangle the mystery of parenting. Still, this serves as a good introduction that can lay some nice groundwork for increased acceptance of both oneself and one's partner, and there are other books to pursue if you're interested in going deeper into any specific aspect of your relationship.
This book was almost enough to convince me that I'm not actually an introvert (or "innie" - vs. "outie", as the authors insist on calling them). They present the differences as physiological, making the characteristics appear immutable- but very little of their descriptions of introverts resonated with me. They consistently describe "innies" as soft spoken, quiet, and basically socially inept. At one point they suggest that introverts would like careers as librarians so they can work uninterrupted - second introvert book that I've read suggesting that. (I AM a librarian. They're off base.) but the worst was suggesting that they should be PRESCHOOL TEACHERS. I can't think of a worse career for an introvert.
Needless to say: I wasn't very impressed.
Needless to say: I wasn't very impressed.
Really helpful for us, especially as we're traveling the world together. ;) I'm close to the middle of the scale but I'm a little more extroverted, so the introvert tips are helpful for me personally as well as helpful in understanding my partner.
I enjoyed the other book written by this author so I thought I would enjoy this. Ended up it is a difficult read because it feels like the author tries to get empathy from readers that it is very difficult for introverts to survive daily life. Most of the points are repeated if you have read Introvert Advantage, but if you have not, it probably is helpful to you.
medium-paced