Reviews

“I’m not what anyone thinks I am. I never was. I didn’t have the mouth to put it into words, to say what was wrong, to change the things I felt I needed to change. And every day it was difficult, walking around and knowing that people saw me one way, knowing that they were wrong, so completely wrong, that the real me was invisible to them. It didn’t even exist to them. So: If nobody sees you, are you still there?”

This was a gorgeous book set in Nigeria. It opens with a mother finding her 20-something son, Vivek Oji, dead at her front door. We slowly find out what happened to Vivek as the book unfolds and we meet a group of young people quietly and desperately searching for their own identities while living under oppressive circumstances.

I decided to give this book 3 stars on Goodreads. I wanted to give it 4, but felt like there was too much gratuitous sex. There were several scenes that felt integral to the story and just as many that felt unnecessary and over the top. Perhaps I’m a prude – I can live with that!

patches_of_purple's review against another edition

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challenging emotional reflective sad medium-paced

5.0

bubblegumcreams's review against another edition

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4.0

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4.5 stars

Book Trigger Warnings (highly recommend taking a look at these before reading): BookTriggerWarnings.com and Reviewer-Provided Trigger Warnings with the Storygraph

Initial thoughts after reading:

the only words I have right after finishing this are... that this book was absolutely heartbreaking. Need to gather my thoughts.

Review after processing:

This is a hard-hitting, uncomfortable book that covers the impact of death, and the complex experiences of grieving, gender, and sexuality. Honestly, throughout the beginning and middle of this novel, I felt underwhelmed and mainly stuck with it due to the reviews and the

Spoiler

medical mystery

included in the story. By the end of the novel, I understood why this book was described as heartbreaking; the conclusion absolutely tore me apart. For weeks after finishing this, I cried anytime I tried to think or talk about the novel. I felt the

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medical mystery

was introduced like it was a storyline, but it wasn't addressed in the end. Overall, this book was quite difficult for me to read and not a 5 star read due to the

Spoiler

incestuous relationship between Vivek and his cousin, as well as the scene where his cousin agrees to let Vivek watch him and his girlfriend having sex, without her consent to Vivek watching

. These two aspects of the story made it very uncomfortable, but this was indeed a heartbreaking novel with beautiful elements.

msmori's review against another edition

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mysterious reflective sad medium-paced

4.0

katreena's review against another edition

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emotional sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? N/A
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

From the very first page of this book I thought the writing was breathtakingly beautiful. My opinion on this never wavered as the author used such powerful imagery and expression of emotion.. I was very thrown off by the incest and the language around the relationship did not let that dynamic fall to be forgotten.

Content Warnings

whatthedeuce's review against another edition

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dark emotional hopeful mysterious reflective sad tense slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

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