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peachy_gene's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.25
I don't think this book hit me the way it seems to hit for people that don't listen to trauma for 40 hours a week [I'm a trauma therapist].There was nothing shocking about this book, however, the details are unimaginably difficult to read. I don't find Yanagihara's writing really all that beautiful- but this story is also really really ugly so I feel like that's on purpose? A devastating demonstration of love, and a reminder that sometimes love is not enough to make people choose to stay.
This book [imo] asks readers to have hard conversations with loved ones and reminds us to make sure our loved ones know the role they play in our lives- it shines light on the fact that Even if they know, they may not be able to be that forever. Sometimes we can't save people, especially from themselves, and especially from what the world has done to them. This book requires empathy and emotional shieldng to get through.
I see a lot of people saying Jude was enabled and frustrating and I agree. But I do think Yanagihara's depiction of what it's like to never be able to see yourself through the eyes of those who love you is extremely well done . The story depicts how formative our earliest years are in relation to how we trust, and form connection and this that translates into adult life. This novel is very much trauma a centered, and looks very deeply at the way trauma shapes our worldview, self perception and life outlook especially when we are leg to believe we are non-human undeserving of the healing it takes to seek trust and the company is others, to crave it desperately and have no idea what to do with that once we have obtained it.
I didn't have any visceral reaction this except for the imagery which was rare. The depictions of abuse, are Even written in a very flat way. The only time I felt anything was when the pov was from Harold, but again- this feels intentional given the subject matter. I think we are perhaps meant to be emotionally disconnected, as Jude has had to be.
I certainly didn't feel that this is the great gay novel by any means. But it is perhaps, an excellent case study for trauma's influence of the human existence if left untreated for a lifetime. It also lends excellent focus to the challenges when life is constant body horror, Jude's inability to connect with his even when he absolutely needed to, his constant act of rebellion towards the vessel he inhabits as punishment for sins he never committed; the impact of rage that is held within and never expressed.This commentary is something that is deeply felt, but extra so when a reader has a very specific set of traumas.
It looks at codependency, [lack of] autonomy, illness, what it means to exist in a body when you couldn't consent to being born, and asks what community is actually responsible for when a person has to be convinced that life really can be with living. This is not a hopeful story. It's sad and I can't ever recommend it to anyone. It never gets better. It has layers that I kept trying to find hope in, with no success. It's nothing but suffering, even happiness glimmers are temporary. I found it truly human at times, while deeply unbelievable at others, but mostly, I found it relatable and for that reason I will be talking about it with my therapist tomorrow.
Graphic: Abandonment, Blood, Chronic illness, Domestic abuse, Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Body horror, Body shaming, Medical trauma, Vomit, Car accident, Child abuse, Child death, Cursing, Drug use, Emotional abuse, Injury/Injury detail, Death, Suicide attempt, Eating disorder, Fire/Fire injury, Forced institutionalization, Gaslighting, Grief, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Toxic relationship, Gore, Homophobia, Kidnapping, Medical content, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Suicide, Terminal illness, Torture, Trafficking, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Violence, and Ableism
jessiemcg's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Every time I put it down, I didn’t want to pick it up again. On reflection - doesn’t it say something that writing can evoke such a reaction?
Graphic: Drug abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Grief, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Homophobia, Medical content, Mental illness, Addiction, Body shaming, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Adult/minor relationship, Car accident, Death, Gaslighting, Torture, Child abuse, Chronic illness, Fire/Fire injury, Physical abuse, Sexual violence, Suicide attempt, Terminal illness, Domestic abuse, and Medical trauma
trayana's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Graphic: Kidnapping, Medical trauma, Rape, Toxic friendship, Vomit, Death of parent, Drug abuse, Dysphoria, Medical content, Blood, Body horror, Body shaming, Chronic illness, Eating disorder, Mental illness, Murder, Panic attacks/disorders, Physical abuse, Self harm, Stalking, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide attempt, Terminal illness, Trafficking, Adult/minor relationship, Homophobia, Injury/Injury detail, Sexual harassment, Alcohol, Death, Domestic abuse, Grief, Sexual violence, Toxic relationship, Drug use, Emotional abuse, Gaslighting, Misogyny, Suicide, Torture, Child abuse, Addiction, Bullying, Car accident, Child death, Pedophilia, Sexual assault, and Violence
thetinysnail's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.0
Graphic: Blood, Domestic abuse, Rape, Sexual assault, Trafficking, Kidnapping, Death of parent, Vomit, Homophobia, Alcohol, Mental illness, Emotional abuse, Gaslighting, Dysphoria, Self harm, Suicide, Ableism, Medical content, Abandonment, Toxic friendship, Toxic relationship, Confinement, Pedophilia, Chronic illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Sexual content, Torture, Forced institutionalization, Injury/Injury detail, Child death, Bullying, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Drug abuse, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide attempt, Sexual violence, Medical trauma, Body shaming, Child abuse, Violence, Stalking, Sexual harassment, Terminal illness, Drug use, Physical abuse, Eating disorder, Death, Car accident, Addiction, Alcoholism, Racism, Cancer, and Adult/minor relationship
mapleleaf_rag's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Death, Self harm, Suicide attempt, Panic attacks/disorders, Mental illness, Blood, Pedophilia, Sexual assault, Chronic illness, Suicide, Ableism, Domestic abuse, Death of parent, Child death, Child abuse, Rape, Car accident, Violence, Toxic relationship, Sexual violence, Physical abuse, Medical trauma, Injury/Injury detail, Homophobia, Grief, Emotional abuse, Eating disorder, Drug use, and Cursing
rainreading's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Graphic: Kidnapping, Medical content, Addiction, Emotional abuse, Child abuse, Child death, Chronic illness, Death of parent, Drug abuse, Eating disorder, Excrement, Fire/Fire injury, Homophobia, Death, Domestic abuse, Forced institutionalization, Injury/Injury detail, Blood, Fatphobia, Gaslighting, Gore, Car accident, Grief, and Body shaming
sirensreviews's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Graphic: Abandonment, Adult/minor relationship, Medical trauma, Gaslighting, Bullying, Body shaming, Child abuse, Chronic illness, Torture, Suicide attempt, Physical abuse, Sexual violence, Hate crime, Grief, Addiction, Transphobia, Toxic relationship, Toxic friendship, Incest, Sexual content, Self harm, Pedophilia, Panic attacks/disorders, Trafficking, Emotional abuse, Cursing, Death, Suicidal thoughts, Sexual harassment, Rape, Gore, Forced institutionalization, Blood, Death of parent, Violence, Mental illness, Injury/Injury detail, Homophobia, Drug abuse, Drug use, Suicide, Domestic abuse, Sexual assault, and Kidnapping
This is the saddest book that you will ever read. It never gets better and I do not recommend reading it quickly because it is alot to take in.garbche's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Loveable characters? No
0.75
Graphic: Suicide, Violence, Confinement, Drug abuse, Drug use, Emotional abuse, Fire/Fire injury, Grief, Homophobia, Suicidal thoughts, Abandonment, Bullying, Gore, Self harm, Addiction, Child abuse, Medical content, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Dysphoria, Eating disorder, Kidnapping, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Body shaming, Injury/Injury detail, Medical trauma, Physical abuse, Rape, Torture, Pedophilia, Sexual harassment, Sexual violence, Suicide attempt, Toxic relationship, Adult/minor relationship, Blood, Domestic abuse, and Body horror
neontulips's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
Graphic: Ableism, Adult/minor relationship, Blood, Body shaming, Bullying, Car accident, Chronic illness, Domestic abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Fire/Fire injury, Gaslighting, Violence, Hate crime, Kidnapping, Medical trauma, Mental illness, Outing, Self harm, Suicidal thoughts, Death, Gore, Rape, Sexual assault, Trafficking, Vomit, Abandonment, Acephobia/Arophobia, Alcohol, Sexual violence, Suicide attempt, Child abuse, Child death, Dementia, Forced institutionalization, Homophobia, Injury/Injury detail, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Sexual content, Suicide, Toxic relationship, Grief, and Medical content
_hiitsstella's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.5
This book feels like a form of trauma-bonding (not in the way social media defines trauma-bonding, but the actual psychological phenomena) the book hurts you, and yet you never want to let it go. It (dare I say) traumatizes you, and you end up bonded with it, seeing aspects of it in your day-to-day life for months after you've put the book away.
Graphic: Sexual assault, Drug use, Homophobia, Self harm, Violence, Domestic abuse, Dysphoria, Emotional abuse, Physical abuse, Chronic illness, Medical content, Medical trauma, Mental illness, Torture, Sexual violence, Adult/minor relationship, Blood, Panic attacks/disorders, Suicide attempt, Ableism, Death, Kidnapping, Pedophilia, Eating disorder, Toxic relationship, Addiction, Child abuse, Gaslighting, Grief, Infidelity, Drug abuse, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, and Alcohol