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2.14 AVERAGE
2.14 AVERAGE
This is marketed as the worst book ever written. It's essentially fanfiction written by a teenage boy about... actually what was it about. Rescuing some damsel in distress?
It was so bad that it was good. Is it the worst book ever written? Hard to say. But it's definitely in the running with a strong head start.
It was so bad that it was good. Is it the worst book ever written? Hard to say. But it's definitely in the running with a strong head start.
adventurous
funny
fast-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Plot
Strong character development:
No
Loveable characters:
No
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
No
"The weather beaten trail wound ahead into the dust racked climes of the baren land which dominates large portions of the Norgolian empire..."
Thus begins The Eye of Argon. I don't know how I'd missed this one for so long, but poorly written... everything aside, I love seeing the influences of SFF authors in amateur works like these. A very thinly veiled Robert E. Howard knock-off, I'd highly recommend this as a curio, the backstory is just as fascinating. Long leave the king!!!
Thus begins The Eye of Argon. I don't know how I'd missed this one for so long, but poorly written... everything aside, I love seeing the influences of SFF authors in amateur works like these. A very thinly veiled Robert E. Howard knock-off, I'd highly recommend this as a curio, the backstory is just as fascinating. Long leave the king!!!
I read that the widespread mockery of this story led to the author never writing another word. I feel so damn bad about that! He was just a kid when he wrote this. And he had potential. It's a terrible story in every imaginable way, but his potential is plain to see. I read it to my life coach and she really enjoyed it.
funny
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
No
Loveable characters:
No
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
No
The vile stench of the Shaman's hot fetid breath over came the nauseated female with a deep soul searing sickness, causing her to wrench her head backwards and regurgitate a slimy, orange- white stream of swelling gore over the richly woven purple robe of the enthused acolyte.
Majestic.
To the right sort of person, “The Eye of Argon” may need no introduction, but it certainly does warrant an explanation.
This story is infamous for being possibly the worst fantasy story, if not the worst piece of fiction, ever written. A sort of My Immortal for the 70s fanzine era. First published in OSFAN, an Ozark area fanzine, in 1970, the story was copied, shared, and mocked to the point that at least one radio show hosted on-air readings by the mid-1980s. Sci-fi and fantasy conventions hosted “readings” which became a sort of party game where readers must attempt to read aloud for as long as possible without laughing. People speculated if it was written in earnest or if the work was some genius piece of satire.
The story was written by a 16-year-old.
As far as I, and Wikipedia, can tell, the story entered the public domain in the United States the moment it was published. The fanzine it was printed in appeared without a copyright notice, a requirement for copyright protection in the U.S. until 1978. As such, it seems to be perfectly legal (in the United States at least, I’m mum on how international copyright might apply) to replicate and monetise the work. In the 80s and 90s, the story was reprinted a few times without any mention of the author, Jim Theis, despite the original zine correctly crediting him. Following the author’s death in 2002, the story has since been reprinted with full credit, though I can’t comment on whether or not any money is making its way to the author’s heirs. Speaking as a huge advocate for the public domain, and admitting that any publishers who monetise this (within the United States) are within their legal right… I can’t help but kinda get the ick about the whole thing.
I’ve heard varying accounts of the author’s reaction to his story’s infamy. It’s hard to track down accurate citations for this sort of thing. A lot of the knowledge that’s accumulated boils down to people on old BBS posts saying “such and such told me that so and so met someone at a con once who said this”. Some have said that the author was a good sport about the whole thing, himself participating in some readings of his work. The Wikipedia page for this story claims, without citation, that in one interview the author claimed he was so hurt by the mockery that he would never write again. Darrell Schweitzer, in his essay “One Fine Day in the Stygian Haunts of Hell: Being the Lore and Legend of the Fabled ‘The Eye of Argon’”, poses the question of the morality of making a mockery of such a work, before going on to answer his own question with the sentiment that “Life ain’t a bed of roses”. I personally disagree with this view. Saying that life isn’t fair might in itself be a true statement, but it isn’t an excuse to continue making life worse for others when presented with the opportunity not to. Again, people are within their rights, but I can’t help but feel the morals of this whole thing might be a bit greyer than some would care to admit.
So, having read it, is it as bad as everyone says? Well, yeah. It’s bad. It’s really, really bad. I don’t want to spend too long dwelling on it for two main reasons. Firstly, because a thousand people before me have already pointed and laughed at descriptions of a "red emerald” or one character’s “lithe, opaque nose”, but mostly I just don’t really feel comfortable making fun of this. Again, this was written by a 16-year-old. Even so, I’m not sure how much of the criticism to level towards the author here. In an interview which I do have a citation for, the author states that “The editing that was done to it [The Eye of Argon] did not help it. In the future, if I have anything else published I would appreciate it if it were published as it was written”, which gives me some reason to believe that a good deal of the errors present in the text may not be the fault of the author.
So yes, it’s bad. Obviously. Of course, it’s bad. It was written by a 16-year-old. What did you expect? The fact someone that young even had the patience to write something this long without scraping it is, honestly, impressive. In an interview published in a later issue of OSFAN, the author was humble enough to say that Argon was “nothing to be proud of and yet it is. Because… [h]ow many writers have written a complete story at so early an age?” He’s absolutely right. Do you have any idea how many totally definitely gonna be great novels I started writing at 16 that never saw more than a page? Thankfully all of those are long deleted, lest anyone rob my hard drive and make a party game out of laughing at them.
I usually refrain from rating things on Goodreads only because I’m not a literary critic and have admittedly little understanding of what does and doesn’t work about the written word. That said, I’m refraining from rating this not because I don’t feel equipped to judge its quality, but because I don’t feel right judging the work of a 16-year-old. If only to offset my own sense of shame from purchasing a paperback of this work, I’ve donated an amount equal to what I paid for it to the American Heart Association, donations to whom were requested by family in the author’s obituary. I would humbly suggest that anyone else who may take enjoyment out of the story, at the author’s expense or otherwise, do the same. Good on Jim Theis for getting this written and getting it published in any form. Encourage young writers.
This story is infamous for being possibly the worst fantasy story, if not the worst piece of fiction, ever written. A sort of My Immortal for the 70s fanzine era. First published in OSFAN, an Ozark area fanzine, in 1970, the story was copied, shared, and mocked to the point that at least one radio show hosted on-air readings by the mid-1980s. Sci-fi and fantasy conventions hosted “readings” which became a sort of party game where readers must attempt to read aloud for as long as possible without laughing. People speculated if it was written in earnest or if the work was some genius piece of satire.
The story was written by a 16-year-old.
As far as I, and Wikipedia, can tell, the story entered the public domain in the United States the moment it was published. The fanzine it was printed in appeared without a copyright notice, a requirement for copyright protection in the U.S. until 1978. As such, it seems to be perfectly legal (in the United States at least, I’m mum on how international copyright might apply) to replicate and monetise the work. In the 80s and 90s, the story was reprinted a few times without any mention of the author, Jim Theis, despite the original zine correctly crediting him. Following the author’s death in 2002, the story has since been reprinted with full credit, though I can’t comment on whether or not any money is making its way to the author’s heirs. Speaking as a huge advocate for the public domain, and admitting that any publishers who monetise this (within the United States) are within their legal right… I can’t help but kinda get the ick about the whole thing.
I’ve heard varying accounts of the author’s reaction to his story’s infamy. It’s hard to track down accurate citations for this sort of thing. A lot of the knowledge that’s accumulated boils down to people on old BBS posts saying “such and such told me that so and so met someone at a con once who said this”. Some have said that the author was a good sport about the whole thing, himself participating in some readings of his work. The Wikipedia page for this story claims, without citation, that in one interview the author claimed he was so hurt by the mockery that he would never write again. Darrell Schweitzer, in his essay “One Fine Day in the Stygian Haunts of Hell: Being the Lore and Legend of the Fabled ‘The Eye of Argon’”, poses the question of the morality of making a mockery of such a work, before going on to answer his own question with the sentiment that “Life ain’t a bed of roses”. I personally disagree with this view. Saying that life isn’t fair might in itself be a true statement, but it isn’t an excuse to continue making life worse for others when presented with the opportunity not to. Again, people are within their rights, but I can’t help but feel the morals of this whole thing might be a bit greyer than some would care to admit.
So, having read it, is it as bad as everyone says? Well, yeah. It’s bad. It’s really, really bad. I don’t want to spend too long dwelling on it for two main reasons. Firstly, because a thousand people before me have already pointed and laughed at descriptions of a "red emerald” or one character’s “lithe, opaque nose”, but mostly I just don’t really feel comfortable making fun of this. Again, this was written by a 16-year-old. Even so, I’m not sure how much of the criticism to level towards the author here. In an interview which I do have a citation for, the author states that “The editing that was done to it [The Eye of Argon] did not help it. In the future, if I have anything else published I would appreciate it if it were published as it was written”, which gives me some reason to believe that a good deal of the errors present in the text may not be the fault of the author.
So yes, it’s bad. Obviously. Of course, it’s bad. It was written by a 16-year-old. What did you expect? The fact someone that young even had the patience to write something this long without scraping it is, honestly, impressive. In an interview published in a later issue of OSFAN, the author was humble enough to say that Argon was “nothing to be proud of and yet it is. Because… [h]ow many writers have written a complete story at so early an age?” He’s absolutely right. Do you have any idea how many totally definitely gonna be great novels I started writing at 16 that never saw more than a page? Thankfully all of those are long deleted, lest anyone rob my hard drive and make a party game out of laughing at them.
I usually refrain from rating things on Goodreads only because I’m not a literary critic and have admittedly little understanding of what does and doesn’t work about the written word. That said, I’m refraining from rating this not because I don’t feel equipped to judge its quality, but because I don’t feel right judging the work of a 16-year-old. If only to offset my own sense of shame from purchasing a paperback of this work, I’ve donated an amount equal to what I paid for it to the American Heart Association, donations to whom were requested by family in the author’s obituary. I would humbly suggest that anyone else who may take enjoyment out of the story, at the author’s expense or otherwise, do the same. Good on Jim Theis for getting this written and getting it published in any form. Encourage young writers.
This is the infamous short story written by a 16 year old boy. This edition contains a forward that explains the search for the author and the missing last page of the story. There is not much about the author except he did become a journalist, a writer and passed away fairly early. The story is a standard sword and sorcery story but the telling thing is the unedited bad use of the English language. Misspellings proliferate. This is why it is famous in science fiction conventions where it is read out loud and one must struggle not to laugh. My suspicion is that the author's high school English teacher suggested that he use a Thesaurus. I find that tool to be not very helpful and actually quite dangerous as words have subtle differences in meaning and authors who use Thesaurii, find themselves using the wrong words.
A book like this exists and persists for a reason. It’s so bad you can’t put it down. It ends quickly and for this you’re thankful. But you’re happy to have experienced it. Mrift!