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3.8 AVERAGE
3.8 AVERAGE
“There is nothing that you can do to me that my own craziness doesn't do to me smarter and faster and better.”
I have schizoaffective disorder, so any book exploring that or schizophrenia is intriguing to me. The title itself drew me in and upon learning the premise, I knew I had to read this eventually. This novel is a semi-autobiographical story about sixteen-year-old Deborah Blau, who battles schizophrenia. Deborah retreats into an imaginary world called the Kingdom of Yr. Her family places her in a mental institution, where she meets Dr. Clara Fried, a dedicated psychiatrist. Through intense therapy, Deborah confronts her hallucinations and delusions, struggling to reclaim her sense of self. The novel explores themes of mental illness, stigma, and the complexities of treatment, offering a powerful depiction of resilience and recovery. I read this book several weeks after my second major hospitalization after a psychotic episode, so that’s all to say I was still very fragile mentally while I was reading this. Immediately I was drawn in by the prose and the simplicity of Deborah’s introduction to the story. I was concerned that reading about another person’s delusional episodes would be triggering for me, but it had the opposite effect, I felt more connected to Deborah and her experiences. I liked hearing about Deborah and the secret world she unconsciously created inside of her mind, and how that world also interacted with the real world.
“Measure the hate you feel now, and the shame. That quantity is your capacity also to love and to feel joy and to have compassion.”
It’s sometimes said that writing can be a vehicle for a writer to exorcise their demons and I think this novel is another example of that. I think the author was able to use the semi autobiographical nature of this story to temporarily return to their hospitalization and their recovery journey and to transmute it into a story that might help others. I was afraid that this story would be too triggering for me, but I was comforted by going through Deborah’s journey and seeing the similarities and differences through the author’s expert writing. Deborah’s mental state was very different from mine when I was in hospital, so it was more intriguing and interesting to me when learning about more details of her condition and perspective. While a lot of Deborah’s experiences differed from mine, the moment where she mentioned having to clean up the aftermath of her episodes resonated with me; constantly having to apologize for things she never remembered saying or doing, always being a ghost to your own experiences. The aspect of the complex and short lived relationships that patients make with one another was also very true to my experiences. Overall, this story was an example of how a person living with schizophrenia can recover and thrive with the help and guidance of a team of mental health professionals. This was a great book to read during my own recovery.
“Sometimes the world is so much sicker than the inmates of its institutions.”
I have schizoaffective disorder, so any book exploring that or schizophrenia is intriguing to me. The title itself drew me in and upon learning the premise, I knew I had to read this eventually. This novel is a semi-autobiographical story about sixteen-year-old Deborah Blau, who battles schizophrenia. Deborah retreats into an imaginary world called the Kingdom of Yr. Her family places her in a mental institution, where she meets Dr. Clara Fried, a dedicated psychiatrist. Through intense therapy, Deborah confronts her hallucinations and delusions, struggling to reclaim her sense of self. The novel explores themes of mental illness, stigma, and the complexities of treatment, offering a powerful depiction of resilience and recovery. I read this book several weeks after my second major hospitalization after a psychotic episode, so that’s all to say I was still very fragile mentally while I was reading this. Immediately I was drawn in by the prose and the simplicity of Deborah’s introduction to the story. I was concerned that reading about another person’s delusional episodes would be triggering for me, but it had the opposite effect, I felt more connected to Deborah and her experiences. I liked hearing about Deborah and the secret world she unconsciously created inside of her mind, and how that world also interacted with the real world.
“Measure the hate you feel now, and the shame. That quantity is your capacity also to love and to feel joy and to have compassion.”
It’s sometimes said that writing can be a vehicle for a writer to exorcise their demons and I think this novel is another example of that. I think the author was able to use the semi autobiographical nature of this story to temporarily return to their hospitalization and their recovery journey and to transmute it into a story that might help others. I was afraid that this story would be too triggering for me, but I was comforted by going through Deborah’s journey and seeing the similarities and differences through the author’s expert writing. Deborah’s mental state was very different from mine when I was in hospital, so it was more intriguing and interesting to me when learning about more details of her condition and perspective. While a lot of Deborah’s experiences differed from mine, the moment where she mentioned having to clean up the aftermath of her episodes resonated with me; constantly having to apologize for things she never remembered saying or doing, always being a ghost to your own experiences. The aspect of the complex and short lived relationships that patients make with one another was also very true to my experiences. Overall, this story was an example of how a person living with schizophrenia can recover and thrive with the help and guidance of a team of mental health professionals. This was a great book to read during my own recovery.
“Sometimes the world is so much sicker than the inmates of its institutions.”
One of those books that when you finish them you can’t help but to pull the book away from your face, stare at it for a while and contemplate. It provided me with a deep opportunity for introspection to appreciate my journey and just how far I have come. This book is raw and painful at times but was so honest and ahead of it’s time that it truly was a cause for change and a cause for good. Very appreciative of the description and honesty pertaining to the sensations or lack thereof during episodes of poor mental health and the clawing and persistence of the individual and those who root for them to fight for health. I lost this book halfway through reading it and picked it up where I left off last week (a year after commencing) and had full memories of the preceding events which speaks to the description and emotion of the words written. Glad to have experienced this book and to have something to turn to when I feel alone or grapple with hope.
For me, this book had the potential to be a great story, but I could absolutely not relate to or wrap my head around the fantasy world the protaganist lived in/created in her mind. I guess that's a good thing, because I can't imagine being that deranged. Don't get me wrong, I did feel badly for her, but I just can't fathom being that out-of-touch with reality, so maybe that was my main frustration with not being able to enjoy the book.
emotional
hopeful
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
a very slow tempo book that has forever changed my perception of schizophrenia.
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
reflective
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Complicated
dark
reflective
sad
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
A New Favorite Book Hmmmm Maybe ??
I Never Promised You A Rose Garden Is A Book That Has Been On My Radar Lately Because Of The Movie On Prime So I Decided To Read It
And I Have To Say This Now
I Really Liked It Very Much
I Loved Deborah Our Main Character She Was A Great Character To Read About
This Book Deals With The Topic Of Mental Health Very Seriously And I Very Much Appreciated That
Because With Someone Like Me Who Struggles With Mental Health Myself
I Wanted It To Be Represented In The Best Way Possible And This Book Did A Great Job Of That
I Overall Loved This Book A New Favorite In The Books
I Never Promised You A Rose Garden Is A Book That Has Been On My Radar Lately Because Of The Movie On Prime So I Decided To Read It
And I Have To Say This Now
I Really Liked It Very Much
I Loved Deborah Our Main Character She Was A Great Character To Read About
This Book Deals With The Topic Of Mental Health Very Seriously And I Very Much Appreciated That
Because With Someone Like Me Who Struggles With Mental Health Myself
I Wanted It To Be Represented In The Best Way Possible And This Book Did A Great Job Of That
I Overall Loved This Book A New Favorite In The Books
challenging
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
Complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Complicated
challenging
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced