Scan barcode
spearly's review against another edition
emotional
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Plot
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.0
Whenever Liya glanced at me, which wasn’t often, she had daggers for stares. Her annoyance level was ridiculous. But as soon as Ma engaged her in conversation, she was someone else entirely
The Trouble with Hating You is a story told in dual POV by Liya, a forward-thinking, stubborn, non-traditional Hindu girl who has effectively been shunned by her community due to her sexual history and no-nonsense demeanour, and Jay, an all-around "nice-guy" (my quotation marks, no the authors) who loved his family and has a grin that could drop your panties. They first meet when Liya literally runs into him when she's escaping dinner with her parents, because as she finds out, they plan to ambush her with the appearance of Jay, with whom they are trying to set her up in an arranged marriage.
I'm not going to pretend to know the intricacies of Hinduism or Indian culture, but I had a major problem with the insidious misogyny in this book. It was most likely included to foil our progressive couple, and the author does a great job tearing it down, particularly at the end (which I will get more into), but that didn't make it any less uncomfortable to read about. Still, I liked how Liya was quick to point it out and shut it down. I liked how she kept her head held high when faced with her communities judgement, disdain, and vicious rumours.
But. I didn't particularly like howher main trauma, the reason that she's so standoffish with guys and never lets anyone in, was because she was assaulted when she was 15. And I really didn't like how Jay is suddenly the one tearing down her walls, healing her. If you want to base your main character's personality on a past trauma, at least let their big breakthrough be something they find within themselves. People don't magically forget their past, their issues, and their scars just because the right person comes along. And if you ARE going to make that the case, then at least show them working through it together. I feel like all we got with Jay and Liya was a few "of course I believe you"s, a few tender kisses, and some long-winded i-love-you speeches at the end that felt more like exposition than a genuine declaration of love.
I ALSO... and this might be controversial.... DON'T LIKE JAY.
Sure, he came through at the end there. But as he's courting Liya, he is such a "nice-guy" it made me literally sick.
Here he is enlisted her friends to convince her to go out with him after she ALREADY SAID NO.
The gist of the twenty-mile-long text chain was this: Jay had asked them to convince me to go out with him! The audacity! Who did he think he was, getting my friends involved? And to make matters worse, of course they were on Team Freaking Jay.
Here he is acting in true nice-guy fashion when Liya continues to turn him down.
I opened my mouth to snap at him, but he walked out and said, “You messed this up, Liya. We would’ve been good together. We could’ve had something real."
Here he is in his inner dialogue calling Liya UNGRATEFUL because he bought her $1400 (!!!) shoes (they are not even friends yet, people), and she was like.... um, take these back weirdo:
Since I’d been helping Liya, that ungrateful woman, for the past few weeks, I’d skipped out on our meals, which upset Ma.
And you're trying to tell me Jay is supposed to be this progressive, "we're always equals mkay? we walk side by side, I will never be above you, we're gonna be uNtRAdiTIonAL like that" kinda guy? I got some news for you....
Anyway he asks her out like 5 times I think before she finally caves. And, look, okay, I get it's a romance novel and the whole point is that she wanted to say yes and he could tell that, and that it's supposed to be romantic that he doesn't give up, but like... how many times do women need to say no for men to take the fucking hint? How many times do men keep pushing because they think we, like Liya, actually want to say yes but are playing hard to get?
(I apologize for that very heteronormative statement. In my personal experience, and the experience of nearly very woman in my life, however, it has always been the man who doesn't take no for an answer.)
And this isn't a fluffy rom-com novel where that sort of toxic behaviour doesn't speak to any deeper issues within that novel's world. When it's all fluff, things aren't that deep. But this is a novel with heavy themes, like deep-rooted sexism in religion, believing women, family dynamics in traditional households... I couldn't ignore Jay's character, and it doesn't stack up against the other themes of the novel.
Unrelated, I found the whole workplace drama thing boring and unnecessary.
Also unrelated, is anyone else hella bothered when a character is like, declaring their love and is all "I fell in love the first moment I saw you" (or in Jay's case: “I’ve been in love with you since the day you walked into that diner, when I took you home and decided to buy these damn shoes.”) when it's so obviously not true?
Um. I think that's most of what I thought. I could probably add more but this review is too long already.
The Trouble with Hating You is a story told in dual POV by Liya, a forward-thinking, stubborn, non-traditional Hindu girl who has effectively been shunned by her community due to her sexual history and no-nonsense demeanour, and Jay, an all-around "nice-guy" (my quotation marks, no the authors) who loved his family and has a grin that could drop your panties. They first meet when Liya literally runs into him when she's escaping dinner with her parents, because as she finds out, they plan to ambush her with the appearance of Jay, with whom they are trying to set her up in an arranged marriage.
I'm not going to pretend to know the intricacies of Hinduism or Indian culture, but I had a major problem with the insidious misogyny in this book. It was most likely included to foil our progressive couple, and the author does a great job tearing it down, particularly at the end (which I will get more into), but that didn't make it any less uncomfortable to read about. Still, I liked how Liya was quick to point it out and shut it down. I liked how she kept her head held high when faced with her communities judgement, disdain, and vicious rumours.
But. I didn't particularly like how
I ALSO... and this might be controversial.... DON'T LIKE JAY.
Sure, he came through at the end there. But as he's courting Liya, he is such a "nice-guy" it made me literally sick.
Here he is enlisted her friends to convince her to go out with him after she ALREADY SAID NO.
The gist of the twenty-mile-long text chain was this: Jay had asked them to convince me to go out with him! The audacity! Who did he think he was, getting my friends involved? And to make matters worse, of course they were on Team Freaking Jay.
Here he is acting in true nice-guy fashion when Liya continues to turn him down.
I opened my mouth to snap at him, but he walked out and said, “You messed this up, Liya. We would’ve been good together. We could’ve had something real."
Here he is in his inner dialogue calling Liya UNGRATEFUL because he bought her $1400 (!!!) shoes (they are not even friends yet, people), and she was like.... um, take these back weirdo:
Since I’d been helping Liya, that ungrateful woman, for the past few weeks, I’d skipped out on our meals, which upset Ma.
And you're trying to tell me Jay is supposed to be this progressive, "we're always equals mkay? we walk side by side, I will never be above you, we're gonna be uNtRAdiTIonAL like that" kinda guy? I got some news for you....
Anyway he asks her out like 5 times I think before she finally caves. And, look, okay, I get it's a romance novel and the whole point is that she wanted to say yes and he could tell that, and that it's supposed to be romantic that he doesn't give up, but like... how many times do women need to say no for men to take the fucking hint? How many times do men keep pushing because they think we, like Liya, actually want to say yes but are playing hard to get?
(I apologize for that very heteronormative statement. In my personal experience, and the experience of nearly very woman in my life, however, it has always been the man who doesn't take no for an answer.)
And this isn't a fluffy rom-com novel where that sort of toxic behaviour doesn't speak to any deeper issues within that novel's world. When it's all fluff, things aren't that deep. But this is a novel with heavy themes, like deep-rooted sexism in religion, believing women, family dynamics in traditional households... I couldn't ignore Jay's character, and it doesn't stack up against the other themes of the novel.
Unrelated, I found the whole workplace drama thing boring and unnecessary.
Also unrelated, is anyone else hella bothered when a character is like, declaring their love and is all "I fell in love the first moment I saw you" (or in Jay's case: “I’ve been in love with you since the day you walked into that diner, when I took you home and decided to buy these damn shoes.”) when it's so obviously not true?
Um. I think that's most of what I thought. I could probably add more but this review is too long already.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexism, Misogyny, Religious bigotry, Death of parent, and Medical content
Moderate: Cursing, Domestic abuse, Sexual assault, Emotional abuse, and Panic attacks/disorders
pastelwriter's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.5
I had mixed feelings about this book. There were elements I certainly loved, but there were also parts I wasn’t a huge fan of.
One of the main things that irritated me a bit as I read is that I felt like the story went back and forth in its messaging. We had a protagonist basically accused of being a “slut,” but it still felt like the overall narrative looked down on women who slept around. It felt like it was trying to go for Liya not really being a “slut.” I don’t know. The messages were just all over the place.
I seriously did appreciate that this tackled the topic of sexual assault. Although the ending didn’t fully feel realistic, it is what I wish would always happen in the real world, so I’m not going to hold it against the book.
In addition, I loved that both protagonists were hardheaded individuals. The banter between Jay and Liya was a lot of fun. I mostly enjoyed their relationship. I thought they had some really sweet moments. I do have to say, though, that I wish both of them had gone to therapy. One time I think Jay even says Liya is his salvation...and just no.I do appreciate though that the book ended with Jay following Liya to Dallas. I didn’t want her staying in Houston for him.
I also appreciated that this also tackled domestic abuse—though at a smaller scale. Liya’s mom was truly in an unfortunate marriage.
Finally, I also liked that this book also featured a lot of women supporting each other. It was a central focus of the narrative that I found so important.
At the end of the day, I’m not mad I picked this up. I’m certainly looking forward to the novel that will follow Preeti, and I hope it’s even better than this one!
P.S. I also liked that, although Liya was against arranged marriages, the whole narrative wasn’t opposed to them. It gave examples of how this practice can be done successfully and consensually.
One of the main things that irritated me a bit as I read is that I felt like the story went back and forth in its messaging. We had a protagonist basically accused of being a “slut,” but it still felt like the overall narrative looked down on women who slept around. It felt like it was trying to go for Liya not really being a “slut.” I don’t know. The messages were just all over the place.
I seriously did appreciate that this tackled the topic of sexual assault. Although the ending didn’t fully feel realistic, it is what I wish would always happen in the real world, so I’m not going to hold it against the book.
In addition, I loved that both protagonists were hardheaded individuals. The banter between Jay and Liya was a lot of fun. I mostly enjoyed their relationship. I thought they had some really sweet moments. I do have to say, though, that I wish both of them had gone to therapy. One time I think Jay even says Liya is his salvation...and just no.
I also appreciated that this also tackled domestic abuse—though at a smaller scale. Liya’s mom was truly in an unfortunate marriage.
Finally, I also liked that this book also featured a lot of women supporting each other. It was a central focus of the narrative that I found so important.
At the end of the day, I’m not mad I picked this up. I’m certainly looking forward to the novel that will follow Preeti, and I hope it’s even better than this one!
P.S. I also liked that, although Liya was against arranged marriages, the whole narrative wasn’t opposed to them. It gave examples of how this practice can be done successfully and consensually.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual assault, Sexism, Misogyny, and Domestic abuse
snslayer's review against another edition
lighthearted
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.5
Content Warnings
Moderate: Sexual assault, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, and Misogyny
larebe's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
inspiring
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Content Warnings
Moderate: Grief, Misogyny, and Sexual assault
jenkneebee's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
sad
tense
slow-paced
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.5
Content Warnings
Moderate: Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Death, Emotional abuse, Misogyny, Pedophilia, Rape, Religious bigotry, Sexism, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, and Toxic relationship
kmanos's review against another edition
3.5
I thought Liya was such a strong lead character, and she has reasons she wants to move on from her past and for it to stay hidden. She wants to protect those she loves (her mother, mainly) from the things people will say if this traumatic event is twisted to lies and spread through her community. And then there's Jay. Sweet Jay, who still blames himself for something that happened twenty years earlier, and doesn't feel as if he deserves a happy ending. Hate to love sometimes doesn't work for me, but I was on board pretty much the whole way through (I thought Liya was sometimes a bit too stubborn for her own good, but then I remembered how truma can cause people to build up tougher ways than most so I could forgive it). It was tough to read about how Liya's community had shunned her for misconceptions they had been fed about her past, and how the one person who was supposed to protect and believe her decided not to play fair, but I appreciated the trust when Liya and Jay finally wanted to share their stories, and felt they had an appropriate outlet without judgement to do so. I did have some issues with it, but overall a solid read.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Grief, Misogyny, and Sexual assault
Minor: Medical content
shelbyjo's review against another edition
emotional
funny
sad
tense
medium-paced
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.25
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Sexism, Misogyny, Pedophilia, and Emotional abuse
Moderate: Bullying, Grief, and Medical content
nemaria's review against another edition
medium-paced
3.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual assault, Rape, Misogyny, and Emotional abuse
Moderate: Death, Domestic abuse, and Grief
More...