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The Sex Lives of African Women: Self-Discovery, Freedom, and Healing by Nana Darkoa Sekyiamah
loveoj's review against another edition
4.0
4.5 ⭐️ Am I officially entering my non fiction bag? Loveddd this book because it felt like a big ol package of big sister advice
bookofcinz's review against another edition
4.0
Relevant, timeless and a must read especially for African Women
This is the book I needed to read that I didn't know I needed to read. A great, in-depth look at the sex lives of African women who are living on and off the continent. I felt the collection was layered, informative and truly a great addition to African and African Diaspora reads. It is not every day you pick up a book that delves deeply into the intimate lives of Black Women and I wanted a lot more.
I cannot recommend this collection enough.
This is the book I needed to read that I didn't know I needed to read. A great, in-depth look at the sex lives of African women who are living on and off the continent. I felt the collection was layered, informative and truly a great addition to African and African Diaspora reads. It is not every day you pick up a book that delves deeply into the intimate lives of Black Women and I wanted a lot more.
I cannot recommend this collection enough.
wamboikay's review against another edition
3.0
I didn’t enjoy this at the start because of the repetitive themes and most stories seemed to be of African women living in the diaspora. This means that they’re having a different life experience to women who live on the African continent. At the end the author writes “…my conversation with her was a reminder that many black women, particularly heterosexual Black women in Europe, feel unloved, undesired and unseen by straight black men.” The stories became slightly more inclusive as I got through the book and there was more about the origins of how they learned about sex. This is an important book that will bring some form of healing to many.
Loved this line from the epilogue, “ I felt most inspired by the women living life on their own terms, who buck tradition, and fearlessly create and recreate their lives.”
Loved this line from the epilogue, “ I felt most inspired by the women living life on their own terms, who buck tradition, and fearlessly create and recreate their lives.”
half_book_and_co's review against another edition
5.0
The Sex Lives of African Women is exactly about what it states in its title. First starting out as a blog and now finally in book form, Nana Darkoa Sekyiamah has spoken to women accross the continent and in the diaspora about their experiences. The stories she collected are now presented under three sub headlines: Self Discovery, Freedom, and Healing. Though as the stories the women tell are complex the assignment to a subsection is sometimes more straightforward than in other cases.
But in the end, that does not matter at all. Nana Darkoa Sekyiamah is a wonderful curator. She puts together a collection of experiences which while surely not exhausting still covers such wide ground. She also does so without falling easily in the tokenizing trap: there are, for example, plenty of queer, lesbian, bi women and multiple trans women so none of their experiences has to stand in for "the queer experience" or "the trans experience". Of course, not all kinds of experiences (spanning polygamy and polyamory, recovering from sexual assault and domestic violence, finding joy and power in BDSM, short and long trails to self discovery, the impact of religion, and much more) are covered multiple times but you can feel the care taken putting this together. It is always very clear that a specific text is to represent this one woman and no more. But taken all together a fantastic mosaic is being built.
I also really enjoyed Nana Darkoa Sekyiamah's writing style. She manages to retain the voices of the different women while also just writing deeply engaging. A book you might want to start and dip in and put of but then find yourself turning page after page not being able to stop.
But in the end, that does not matter at all. Nana Darkoa Sekyiamah is a wonderful curator. She puts together a collection of experiences which while surely not exhausting still covers such wide ground. She also does so without falling easily in the tokenizing trap: there are, for example, plenty of queer, lesbian, bi women and multiple trans women so none of their experiences has to stand in for "the queer experience" or "the trans experience". Of course, not all kinds of experiences (spanning polygamy and polyamory, recovering from sexual assault and domestic violence, finding joy and power in BDSM, short and long trails to self discovery, the impact of religion, and much more) are covered multiple times but you can feel the care taken putting this together. It is always very clear that a specific text is to represent this one woman and no more. But taken all together a fantastic mosaic is being built.
I also really enjoyed Nana Darkoa Sekyiamah's writing style. She manages to retain the voices of the different women while also just writing deeply engaging. A book you might want to start and dip in and put of but then find yourself turning page after page not being able to stop.
jpreads6's review against another edition
challenging
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
5.0
This was such an informative read and from a perspective that I haven't really considered. If you're on a journey for sexual liberation, this is a great place to start from.
anouk_luypaert's review against another edition
adventurous
emotional
informative
reflective
fast-paced
4.5
theythemsam's review
4.25
I feel like many people have a preconceived idea of the sex lives of African women and I think this book is important to read if you fall into that bucket, which included me. I loved philester’s and chantale’s story and overall just liked learning about everyone’s sex lives and how they got to be who they are today
amanda_nyanhongo's review against another edition
3.0
This book took me across various journeys, rich with its sex-based stories from African women both on and off the continent.
However, I must admit after a couple of stories into the book. The novelty was wearing off despite how unique each story was. The book is divided into three themes: self-discovery, healing, and freedom. Perhaps each theme could have focused on a select few stories to allow more time to unpack the various stories. Stories like that of Philester, the Kenyan sex worked deserved many more pages. One could see there are various layers that needed to be explored.
Despite this, the book taught me a lot about sex, love, freedom, and healing. That as human beings we are ever evolving and do not need to restrict ourselves to certain versions of ourselves. But most importantly that sexual pleasure is a right that we are entitled to especially as women and is something we should unashamedly be in pursuit of.
However, I must admit after a couple of stories into the book. The novelty was wearing off despite how unique each story was. The book is divided into three themes: self-discovery, healing, and freedom. Perhaps each theme could have focused on a select few stories to allow more time to unpack the various stories. Stories like that of Philester, the Kenyan sex worked deserved many more pages. One could see there are various layers that needed to be explored.
Despite this, the book taught me a lot about sex, love, freedom, and healing. That as human beings we are ever evolving and do not need to restrict ourselves to certain versions of ourselves. But most importantly that sexual pleasure is a right that we are entitled to especially as women and is something we should unashamedly be in pursuit of.
devonprice's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
funny
hopeful
inspiring
medium-paced
5.0
An incredible qualitative study of sexual liberation.