Reviews with content warning for Mental illness - How Moon Fuentez Fell in Love with the Universe

fact: star is objectively beautiful. fact: i am not. fact: i've been reminded of these facts for as long as i can remember. they're invisible tattoos stretching across my jiggly brown body, permanent because no one - not mum nor star nor any random stranger on the street - will let me forget them. (18)
i just keep my mouth shut and mentally burn some words on the inside of my skull: be grateful. be grateful. there they join my invisible tattoos of you're ugly, you're loud, and you're a bad, bad daughter. unlike the tattoos, be grateful has pretty much lost all meaning through repetition. i should switch it up. (20)
mom, for some reason unknown to me, couldn't love me as much. it was like there was a shallow reservoir of love inside her, and star took it all. star drank it all up before i even had a chance. (32)
"look at that moon. have you ever seen a prettier moon?" [...] then daddy said "i have! i have!" and he lifted me in the air and told me i was the most beautiful moon he'd ever seen, and that's why he named me moon, because he'd hoped i'd always see the moon and know my worth and place in the world. (37)
the idea that languages transform and move and become something new, just like people. imagine. somewhere, all the way back in the beginning, there was a first word. who said it? what was it? the idea gives me goosebumps along my arms, neck, spine. (68)
i felt like i was worth something, for the first time since dad left. it made my heart break and repair itself all at the same time, over and over until i was certain i fell in love with this boy right then and there. (92)
when i turn back to santiago, his eyes are all soft on me. it's hard to explain. he looks like he actually likes me for a moment. (109)
when did the first humans think of flowers? did they ever wonder why the earth so willingly burst into beauty every spring? all those colours making a wide, wild sea on the horizon... it must've been pure magic. it still is, really. (127)
he's still smiling, so i still don't have a comeback. my brain is actually mushy thanks to that smile. but i can't help it. it's only the second time i've ever seen him look anything but murderous. [...] and just like that, soft santiago is gone. i already miss him. (146)
"you know he wants you. you gotta know that, right?" [...] "you annoy him because he wants you." (147)
again he grins. and it makes my whole equilibrium flip upside down. (152)
i'm rewarded with another burst of laughter. it's lovely, so lovely, that now i think of warm summer rain, making everything smell alive and green, like a whole wet forest of ancient, slow-growing lichen. (170)
that's me, moon fuentez. the flower no one wants to be around, unless you count massive amounts of bugs from time to time. (177)
how can i explain this, that when andro tells me i'm good at fonts and photos? that's the first compliment i've gotten from someone who isn't tia, or star [...] and how those tiny, no-big-deal compliments andro gave me, like it was nothing, how precious they are, like raw, sparkling tourmalines tucked away in my pocket. (183)
i imagine all of santiago as made of stars. (205)
he and i, we’re having a whole conversation with our eyes. moon the weed and santiago the nebula. (216)
that’s what those words feel like, by the way. you talk too much. each consonant is a slick blade running along my neck, not quite cutting, but almost as painful. (220)
even if she isn’t there for me like i want her to be, or need her to be, star is my best friend. (254)
“don’t be sorry. do you realize how much you apologize to everyone?” (260)
the more i get to know him, the more good looking he gets. like right now, for instance. he’s pissed i won’t open up to him. there’s curiosity mixed with that, and concern too. he should have the weirdest look on his face. but of course not. he looks like a freaking god. (277)
he looks at me the way people look at star. but better. because there’s no hint that he wants to get something from me. he look at me like i’m perfectly lovely, and funny, and beautiful just as i am, and that is all enough. (290)
now i imagine it like a thread: we’re stitched together by the truth of who we are and where we came from. (332)
i’d always thought i was too big and too loud and too much to be beautiful. but santiago, even with that simple compliment, makes me feel like i’m the prettiest thing he’s ever seen. (345)
“how could something so common be so magical? but maybe everything is magic and we just get used to the magic.”
we smile at each other for so long, it’s like this moment becomes a whole new universe, like this fraction of a second has been compressed to a trillionth of a period and we’re about to burst. i don’t know how or when, but Santiago and I are going to explode. we’ll become the dust of ancient planets and suns and moons. we’ll both become one whole, sparkling nebula, thousands of light-years long.
everything about santiago makes me feel safe. little roots are growing out of the bottoms of my feet, all the way down to the other side of the earth. that way i never stumble again.
“you’re not selfish for wanting to be less lonely.”
“i’m probably never going to look as beautiful as you.” “you’re more beautiful than me without even trying”.
“even if you were in alaska - even if you were on another planet, moon - you’re worth getting”.
everything feels new right along with me. who could I be? I could be anything. no, scratch that. i could be everything.
“don’t let anyone feel like they’re the one who’s supposed to save you.” […] “you can only save yourself. this doesn’t mean others can’t help you. but if you’re looking for them to give you your worth, to give your life meaning? they will always fail you.”
maybe love is thicker than blood.

Content Warnings

caitlinemccann's review

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emotional funny reflective sad fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

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bialves's review

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dark emotional funny inspiring lighthearted reflective fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

One cute book that talks about serious matters. I was waiting for a very light book, but it had some dense stuff. Their relationship with her body had a huge impact on me...

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selysrivera's review

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challenging emotional funny inspiring medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.0

I enjoyed this book! It’s sex positive and the characters grew. But it really needed a trigger warning.

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samthebookdevotee's review

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challenging dark emotional hopeful inspiring sad tense medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

This is one of the books that have sat on my tbr cart for a long while and I am honestly upset it took me this long to read it. I absolutely loved this book. I loved how it was written, the characters, and the plot. I literally could not get enough. I was almost late for my movie showing because I didn't want to wait to finish the book.

I absolutely loved Moon. I struggle a lot with my own weight and used to make a lot of self-deprecating jokes or comments about myself. Sometimes I still have those thoughts but I am working on them. I enjoyed seeing her bond with Santiago and seeing her grow confident as an artist and a creator while on the bus tour. I also connected a lot with the sister dynamic. I am not a twin but I and my younger sister were often compared by our parents. I was the golden child and my sister the scapegoat. I didn't realize it at the time. I couldn't understand why my sister held animosity towards me which in turn made me resent her. We're a lot better now, but I couldn't help but think of my sister often throughout this book. It's why I couldn't hate Star. Some of the things she did were so messed up, but I understood what drove her to that point.

I have a few mixed feelings about Moon's romance with Santiago. While I am glad they were there for each other, there were times they pitted their own insecurities against each other causing toxic behavior from both parties. This was addressed towards the end a bit which I did like. I do wish there was more talk about it though. I guess I didn't hate it, but it's something to take note of.

I absolutely loved the writing style. I liked how almost lyrical the writing got, especially when Moon thought of the past. I thought the inclusion of bugs was a fascinating approach and brought a touch of magic to the story. I also liked how the author played around with the length of chapters.

Overall, if you have not read this book already, you absolutely must. It's not only a great story but also one that includes an important life lesson. I will warn you it might be hard for some readers. There is depression, suicide, abuse, and talk about slut shaming. So please keep this in mind if you are sensitive to these topics.

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toffishay's review

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emotional hopeful reflective tense medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? No

3.75

A really powerful, emotional read. The style of writing is so beautiful; you can really tell that the author is also a poet. I love Moon and Santiago, the exploration of them as characters and them together. Moon is an awesome character too, so quippy and fun. The book also explores really important themes of depression, emotional abuse, physical abuse, insecurity, and identity. How religion can harm us and opening ourselves up can save us. What brings the book down for me is that there are just so many themes being explored. It makes for a really intense read when so much is happening. Definitely check content warnings.

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imstephtacular's review

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adventurous emotional hopeful reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

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booksybochinche's review

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emotional hopeful inspiring mysterious reflective sad fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

5.0

This book made ME fall in love with the universe. Moon is a relatable protagonist, one whose story I could’ve really benefited from reading when I was younger.

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