Take a photo of a barcode or cover
1.91 AVERAGE
1.91 AVERAGE
I was really excited about reading this book. Unfortunately, it did not deliver for me. I really wish I would've read the reviews prior to reading it. At one point, I stopped reading and went to read the reviews because I truly thought it was a "it's not you (book), it's me" moment. I was struggling. Many of my issues and thoughts are complained about in other reviews. I finished it, and the biggest disappointment is I didn't feel like I had a story to follow until ~halfway through.
tense
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
No
Loveable characters:
No
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
No
I can't finish this book, and I read at least 50% before making my decision.
I didn't connect with any of the characters except one. They weren't the main character, and the person died early in the book. I'm a 56 year old African American woman with roots in the south, and this book felt foreign to me. The Black characters weren't believable for me. They felt cold and sounded like they were pretending to be Black. I was prepared for the racism and sexism because that was how life was during that time period.
After reading the synopsis, I really thought this would be a book I would enjoy.
This book was a review for Onlinebookclub.org
I didn't connect with any of the characters except one. They weren't the main character, and the person died early in the book. I'm a 56 year old African American woman with roots in the south, and this book felt foreign to me. The Black characters weren't believable for me. They felt cold and sounded like they were pretending to be Black. I was prepared for the racism and sexism because that was how life was during that time period.
After reading the synopsis, I really thought this would be a book I would enjoy.
This book was a review for Onlinebookclub.org
Content Warnings
Graphic: Alcoholism, Hate crime, Misogyny, Racial slurs, Racism, Sexism, Grief, Abortion, Death of parent, Pregnancy, Sexual harassment, Classism
fast-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
No
Loveable characters:
No
Diverse cast of characters:
Complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus:
No
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
No
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Update to review: Author went out of her way to have my paid review disqualified because she didn’t like it, so I didn’t get paid. Lower my rating from 0.5 to 0. Book is garbage; don’t read.
Deceptive Calm is the worst book I have read in years. I disliked everything about this book. I only finished it because I was being paid to review it, and if I did not finish the book, I would not be able to review it per the review agreement, so I pushed through just so that I could review it. This book needed to be reviewed so that others know how terrible it really is so they don’t waste their time. It took me two months to get through it because the writing was a struggle to read.
Deceptive Calm is the worst book I have read in years. I disliked everything about this book. I only finished it because I was being paid to review it, and if I did not finish the book, I would not be able to review it per the review agreement, so I pushed through just so that I could review it. This book needed to be reviewed so that others know how terrible it really is so they don’t waste their time. It took me two months to get through it because the writing was a struggle to read.
It is a book about a white-passing Black female’s life experience in the US in the 1960s through the 1980s, written by a white female boomer. The author uses the N-word needlessly in the story, in what felt like a way to just be able to use the word. Patricia Skipper wrote the main character in her voice rather than the voice of a Black female. Vanessa lacked depth in her character development; you don’t get much sense about any internal struggles she experiences living through the situations she lives through. Trisha, the supporting character, and Vanessa’s best friend, had more character depth than the main character.
The book is so poorly written and poorly edited. It has random time jumps with jarring transitions, if any transitions at all, inconsistencies, and holes in the storyline. The way things happen in the story are haphazard which makes it difficult to read. The dialogue was confusing at points because of the author’s use of very few character identifiers. I had to reread several sections to clearly understand what character was speaking. The author was gratuitously crass, and the sex scenes were all rape scenes written gratuitously explicit.
There was so much history about the Civil War, but little about the current times Vanessa was living through (60s-80s). The main character was living through some tumultuous times for race relations in the US and little is mentioned about that. Yet probably 1/3 of the book was random US Civil War facts that seem superfluous; it felt like the author was cozy with Wikipedia while she wrote this.
The book ends with no closure to the story, which was a disappointment after struggling to complete it.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Racial slurs, Racism
Moderate: Rape, Abortion
Minor: Alcoholism
challenging
informative
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Complicated
Loveable characters:
No
Diverse cast of characters:
No
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Complicated
adventurous
emotional
informative
mysterious
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
N/A
challenging
dark
emotional
tense
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
A mix
Strong character development:
No
Loveable characters:
No
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
I want my time back.
I really wanted to like this book. But… unfortunately it did not live up to the hopes I had for it.
We start in 1968 where we are introduced to Vanessa, Barry, Trisha, and Sister Rosalie. We are taken through a thorough Charleston history but strange storyline. It felt detailed but randomly placed at the same time. We continue following Vanessa, Trisha, and Barry as they finish high school, go on to college, and then life after. To be honest… a LOT of what is written throughout that period (and the entire book if I’m being honest), really felt like it was part author written and part AI filler. Just jumbled, not well written, and all over at times. The conversation pieces were NOT great. There were sex scenes that simply did not need to be there (and I love reading smut so imagine my surprise and disappointment). The ending felt rushed and choppy. Yay for the closure (ish) but gosh was it poorly written.
And my girl Vanessa was assaulted throughout the entire book. The sex was not written romantically. No care. Just bad… truly truly bad.
The best parts of this story were Trisha, Sister Rosalie, and… well that’s it probably. I love the concept and the idea of the story. It could have gone far but it just truly missed the mark. I finished it and liked the overall concept but it is only a 1.5 star read for me. I would simply not recommend this to anyone really…
If you are a reader sensitive to racial issues (obviously a heavy topic), abortion, or sexual assault … this is NOT the book for you.
Honest review left with the expectation of compensation through Online Book Club.
I really wanted to like this book. But… unfortunately it did not live up to the hopes I had for it.
We start in 1968 where we are introduced to Vanessa, Barry, Trisha, and Sister Rosalie. We are taken through a thorough Charleston history but strange storyline. It felt detailed but randomly placed at the same time. We continue following Vanessa, Trisha, and Barry as they finish high school, go on to college, and then life after. To be honest… a LOT of what is written throughout that period (and the entire book if I’m being honest), really felt like it was part author written and part AI filler. Just jumbled, not well written, and all over at times. The conversation pieces were NOT great. There were sex scenes that simply did not need to be there (and I love reading smut so imagine my surprise and disappointment). The ending felt rushed and choppy. Yay for the closure (ish) but gosh was it poorly written.
And my girl Vanessa was assaulted throughout the entire book. The sex was not written romantically. No care. Just bad… truly truly bad.
The best parts of this story were Trisha, Sister Rosalie, and… well that’s it probably. I love the concept and the idea of the story. It could have gone far but it just truly missed the mark. I finished it and liked the overall concept but it is only a 1.5 star read for me. I would simply not recommend this to anyone really…
If you are a reader sensitive to racial issues (obviously a heavy topic), abortion, or sexual assault … this is NOT the book for you.
Honest review left with the expectation of compensation through Online Book Club.
dark
reflective
sad
tense
slow-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
No
Loveable characters:
Complicated
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Complicated
I must say that Patricia Skipper has writing talent. Skipper started the book off with a terrible act of racist vitriol that captured the attention and a sense of care and sympathy for several of our main characters, while introducing us seamlessly to many of the main supporting characters as well as the racial climate of North Charleston, South Carolina at the time of the setting - 1968.
I was quite interested in the story and characters and, from reading a bit of the description of this book, excited to read a story that would champion against racism and racial prejudice. I do not believe this book accomplished those goals, however, if it ever set out to anyway. I quickly became disgusted at the main Black teenager Barry's classification as a playboy with no regard for the women he was toying with, the main character Vanessa's helplessness and undying love for the man who cheated on her after pressuring her to let him take her virginity, and then later Trisha's obvious discomfort around poor Black people which didn't blend with the fact that she grew up in a poor neighborhood herself, went to an integrated high school, and had a Black best friend throughout the entire book.
I understand that a lot of the characterizations and speech from characters were to do with the author's trying to get the point of racism at the time across, but at times it was nonsensical and only seemed to reflect what the author thought. For example, Trisha helps a young boy by taking him to the hospital after seeing him crash his bike and being unable to find his mother. When the mother comes to Trisha's door to thank her, the text reads '"You done nice thing for my boy. You need bucks for sewing my baby up?" the hooker asked in almost illiterate speech.' I made a note in my ebook saying that I hate this author, because how in the world can that be interpreted as illiterate speech? The sentence disgusted me. And it seems nonsensical that after growing up poor, in an integrated neighborhood, and with Sister Rosalie who talked in a similar if not identical way, that she wouldn't be able to understand the mother's words. I felt this was simply something the author felt.
I was also dissatisfied with the extensive use of the n word. We could have easily gained the point of racism without the word being used so often. I understand that in the years this book takes place, white people would have said it a lot more freely and confidently, which this book portrays, but it was not a pleasant reading experience for a Black American, and was at some times unnecessary. Towards the end of the book it became so frequent I was appalled.
I also found the awful harassment and assault Vanessa had to endure at the hands of her husband to be nearly unbearable to read. I really wanted to stop reading at this point more than any other point, but I persevered hoping things would at least get better for her.
The ending of the book left a lot to be desired. I felt it ended way too abruptly without a satisfying ending to let the reader know what happened to key characters.
Additionally, after re-reading the blurb for the book, I very much detest that Vanessa is described as living 'in a Catholic orphanage for Blacks.' Whether that was a term being used at the time the book is set in or not, it is in poor taste to put it in your book blurb and tells me all I need to know about the author.
I really did not enjoy this book and thought that it was strange the author, not being Black, decided to write many of the main characters, and the main main character as Black. It was disconcerting and shed light on how the author thinks Black people can be characterized.
I considered giving this book a rating of 2/5, but after more thought while writing this review, I have decided to give it a firm 0/5.
I was quite interested in the story and characters and, from reading a bit of the description of this book, excited to read a story that would champion against racism and racial prejudice. I do not believe this book accomplished those goals, however, if it ever set out to anyway. I quickly became disgusted at the main Black teenager Barry's classification as a playboy with no regard for the women he was toying with, the main character Vanessa's helplessness and undying love for the man who cheated on her after pressuring her to let him take her virginity, and then later Trisha's obvious discomfort around poor Black people which didn't blend with the fact that she grew up in a poor neighborhood herself, went to an integrated high school, and had a Black best friend throughout the entire book.
I understand that a lot of the characterizations and speech from characters were to do with the author's trying to get the point of racism at the time across, but at times it was nonsensical and only seemed to reflect what the author thought. For example, Trisha helps a young boy by taking him to the hospital after seeing him crash his bike and being unable to find his mother. When the mother comes to Trisha's door to thank her, the text reads '"You done nice thing for my boy. You need bucks for sewing my baby up?" the hooker asked in almost illiterate speech.' I made a note in my ebook saying that I hate this author, because how in the world can that be interpreted as illiterate speech? The sentence disgusted me. And it seems nonsensical that after growing up poor, in an integrated neighborhood, and with Sister Rosalie who talked in a similar if not identical way, that she wouldn't be able to understand the mother's words. I felt this was simply something the author felt.
I was also dissatisfied with the extensive use of the n word. We could have easily gained the point of racism without the word being used so often. I understand that in the years this book takes place, white people would have said it a lot more freely and confidently, which this book portrays, but it was not a pleasant reading experience for a Black American, and was at some times unnecessary. Towards the end of the book it became so frequent I was appalled.
I also found the awful harassment and assault Vanessa had to endure at the hands of her husband to be nearly unbearable to read. I really wanted to stop reading at this point more than any other point, but I persevered hoping things would at least get better for her.
The ending of the book left a lot to be desired. I felt it ended way too abruptly without a satisfying ending to let the reader know what happened to key characters.
Additionally, after re-reading the blurb for the book, I very much detest that Vanessa is described as living 'in a Catholic orphanage for Blacks.' Whether that was a term being used at the time the book is set in or not, it is in poor taste to put it in your book blurb and tells me all I need to know about the author.
I really did not enjoy this book and thought that it was strange the author, not being Black, decided to write many of the main characters, and the main main character as Black. It was disconcerting and shed light on how the author thinks Black people can be characterized.
I considered giving this book a rating of 2/5, but after more thought while writing this review, I have decided to give it a firm 0/5.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Racial slurs, Racism, Sexual assault
Buckle up. This is going to be a long one.
Now, before I get started, I want to make a point: the author clearly had a lot of passion for certain parts of this book. Clearly, she had a story she wanted to tell, and to write and publish a book in general is a great achievement. I'm sure a lot of work went into this.
However, passion and hard work are only parts of what make a good book, and they are, surprisingly, SMALL compared to a dedication to editing, learning, self-awareness, and a willingness to improve.
Passion and hard work were not enough, and it feels to me like they are all this book has going for it. The nicest thing I can say about it is that it is clear this was written by a human and not AI.
To call this a one-star read is an insult to other one-star books I have read. In fact, if I could give it negative stars, I would. If I owned this physically, I would not give it away or inflict it upon a thrift shop or used book store, I would burn it.
Call me dramatic, but this entire experience left me awed at how bafflingly bad a book could be. Normally if I come across a self-published book that is very bad I won't rate it or I won't finish it, but there are reasons for all of this hubbub this time around, and some VERY particular things in this book that, to me, warrant a scathing review regardless of its circumstances of publication.
Now, like many other reviewers here I read this for the promise of money from a review site. I was getting endless emails about a "limited time offer" (which went on for months, apparently) to get paid a nice amount of money for reviewing the book. Seeing the book and its ratings, I wasn't too interested.
Then they raised the payment, so I finally bit.
I have not been paid. Technically, there are steps I could go through to get me <i>closer</i> to being paid, but after seeing several people here say that their reviews got rejected and payment was not given because they rated the book negatively (and my initial review for it was rejected for reasons that honestly seemed like extreme nitpicks to me, considering they have sent me emails rife with grammatical errors themselves), I don't want to waste my time jumping through hoops and likely not being paid in the end, regardless.
So here I am. On Goodreads. Ready to tell you all about the single worst book I've ever read.
In detail. With spoilers. No, I'm not marking them. Don't read this book. Don't do it.
Also, I'm going to need to tackle this in categories. So, let's get into:
<b>The Writing:</b>
Let's get the technical problems out of the way first.
There were actual sentences, paragraphs, and transition scenes missing in this book. I wish I was joking, but the amount of times that things would happen out of nowhere, characters would abruptly change topic of conversation with no hint of a segue, and there were literal transition scenes and sentences missing was INSANE. Characters were referenced who never showed up previously, there were long historical and descriptive rambles that added nothing to the story or atmosphere and simply destroyed the pacing, and the characters were kept at such an arm's length from the reader that it was impossible to have any emotional investment in them. <i>In a book marketed as a historical romance.</i>
On a note of the long rambles, there were also completely uncalled-for rambles describing medical things that felt like they were pulled straight out of a wikipedia article...<i>such as a lengthy description on how breastfeeding works, given from a nurse to Vanessa when she gave birth. It was literally an entire page on the ebook. That's about a third to a half of a page in print, which is TOO MUCH DESCRIPTION OF HOW BREASTFEEDING WORKS.</i>
There were also several grammatical and spelling errors that compounded the issue, making everything worse. I'm sure I missed some of them while reading, since I was so distracted by the disjointed prose.
I highly doubt this book was edited by a professional. Honestly, I would be surprised if the author even self-edited it or used beta readers. It reads like a very, VERY rough first draft.
<b>The Plot:</b>
What plot?
Tell me, is the plot here in the room with us?
Is the plot anything more than a jumbled, chopped-up mess of attempted thematic ramblings?
No?
The basic description is that it's about a white-passing black woman living in the south. (Even though she's in California for most of the book.)
But no, it isn't, it's about her white friend working in media.
But no, it isn't, it's about a nun who won't shut up about the civil war.
But no, it isn't, because it's about...marital abuse?
Ahh, maybe it's about the abrupt murder plot that has motivations that fall apart at the barest touch of scrutiny and tie back to the themes of racism that were missing through most of the book and only showed up when it was convenient for the author. (The entire murder plot, by the way, happened in the last forty or so pages, and followed completely random detectives that had never shown up previously in the book.)
What is this book about? The life and times of a woman with all the personality of a plank of wood that has a hole drilled into it.
That description is important. Let's get into...
<b>Characters:</b>
Our leading plank of wood is named Vanessa.
She's beautiful. Everyone lusts after her. She has all the backbone of a jelly fish and all the personality of a limp noodle. The only trait I can confidently say about her is that she's a workaholic (which gets abandoned the second she has a child which, though fair, did remove the only character trait she had outside of crying at the drop of a hat and being as passive as a leaf caught in a river).
She is so passive, in fact, that she managed to make the sex scenes between her and the man she allegedly love COME OFF AS MORE RAPEY THAN ACTUAL SCENES OF SEXUAL ASSAULT THAT I HAVE READ.
But oh, I get ahead of myself.
The love interest is a dude named Barry.
Barry is a trash fire of a human being. He had no redeeming qualities whatsoever. I do not buy his alleged "love" of the main character, and he had all the charm of a rabid dog. I hated him.
Trisha is the white friend. Trisha is annoying and inconsistent. That's all I can say about her.
Sister Roe is a history-obsessed nun that interjected random historical facts into every single conversation, no matter how irrelevant. She had no charm, and was insufferable on every page she was on.
Tod is the trash-bag husband of Vanessa. He sucked too, and yet I only hated him as much as I hated Barry, not more. That's not a great look for comparing the hero and villain of a story, when they are equally awful.
The other characters were all so bland and meaningless that they aren't worth talking about, so let's get into...
<b>The "Romance":</b>
This is the least romantic thing I've ever read, and it all boils down to the utter passivity of Vanessa.
You know how I called her a plank of wood with a hole drilled through? There's a reason for that.
There is not a single scene in this book--either between her and her "true love" Barry or her abusive husband (even pre-abuse)--that doesn't come off as sexual assault.
NOT EVEN ONCE does she initiate or show interest in even kissing either of these men--it's always them suddenly shoving their tongue down her throat and having their way with her. She is never described as kissing them back, and during the extremely unpleasant sex scenes she is never shown to do anything more than lying there and taking it, regardless of who her partner is. (The only times when she is described as doing something is when she's coerced into giving her "true love" a guided hand job and the second when her abusive husband forces her to give him a BJ).
A lot of this is due to the distance the narrative has with her in particular. The scenes are extremely clinical and distant, with no sense of emotion. Even in the scene where she LOSES HER VIRGINITY, we don't know what she feels about it. (A scene where her "true love" boyfriend literally coerces her into sex after she says no, saying, AND I QUOTE: "If you really love me, you'll do this for me.") The only thing we know that she feels about it is that she was a bit uncomfortable and cried the entire time, but since she cries every other page her tears really didn't mean much aside from making the scene come off as even more rapey.
Forgive my crass language, but this really is the worst side of this book, and it's important to get across just how bad it is, especially as it is a big part of why I feel the need to be so harsh on it.
The real kick in the teeth is that the book desperately wants to audience to believe that Barry--manipulative, CHEATING, Barry--and plank-of-wood Vanessa are madly in love with one another and destined to be together. We're supposed to cheer for these two.
The story literally ends with Vanessa sweeping into his hospital room after he got stabbed while trying to help her with a problem (long, convoluted, stupid plot there), and she cries (what a shock) while confessing her undying love for him.
...all the while, her best friend (white girl Trisha) is also hospitalized, fighting for her life after she was poisoned by a doctor who was trying to kill Barry, and she sacrificed herself to save him. Trisha, who literally has been the only loyal friend she's had her entire life.
We don't find out what happens to Trisha. Last thing we see of her, she's getting poisoned. Maybe she lives, maybe not. Who knows?
(On a side note, when I described this ending plotline to my husband, he said it sounded like a bad soap opera. I agree.)
And, since it's so pertinent to the characters, let's talk about...
<b>Inconsistency:</b>
There was not a single character who was consistent throughout their entire storyline. Either the narrative told us they were one thing while they acted the opposite, or they actually broke previous characterization.
Sister Roe was supposed to be a mother to Vanessa, yet wasn't even remotely upset at Barry when he cheated on her. (Barry's father, by the way, also seemed uncharacteristically aloof about the whole issue. Nobody who should have been upset was upset aside from Vanessa.)
While some of Tod's broken character was explained away, none of it explains why he went from fairly chill to MURDEROUSLY RACIST without even a sign of his racism brought up earlier. I feel like if someone's willing to kill his own wife for being black, at least a comment or something would have been brought up over the years of them knowing one another. It was completely out of the blue.
The worst for it, however, was Vanessa.
One moment she's the meekest, most spineless person on earth, the next we're supposed to believe she's a hardcore feminist standing up to the Man and being the Best Reporter Ever.
One moment she's sleeping with her fiance, the next she's an inexperienced virgin on their wedding night.
One moment she's pregnant out of wedlock and immediately has an abortion without a second thought (in the 60's, no less), the next she's a devout Catholic who can't abide the idea of divorcing her abusive husband and is demanding to be married in a Catholic church.
One moment she's so traumatized by the abortion that she can't stand the idea of having sex because she fears pregnancy, the next she's totally fine with having kids and giving up her career for motherhood.
None of these things go together. She wasn't a character, she was a McGuffin to get across whatever point the author was trying to make.
And on the final, most important point, let's address...
<b>Themes:</b>
This is a "theme" book. By which, I mean it is a book that wants to tackle heavy subjects.
This also commits the cardinal sin of "theme" books: trying to tackle too much, and failing to do any of the issues justice.
It wants to tackle racism, and abusive relationships, and abortion (in the most disgusting, pointless, awful scene in the book that was over-graphic, excessive, and felt exploitative, by the way. It felt like it was there for shock value and nothing else. It made me viscerally angry, and I ended up skimming it to get it over with). It wants to tackle being an orphan, being a white-passing black woman, navigating a male-dominated career as a woman, grief...etc;...etc;...the list goes on.
This is too much, and all of them were tackled with the delicacy of a child wielding a hammer.
There was no focus. There was no consistency. In the attempt to cover every Big Issue possible, none of them were given the depth or attention required, leaving the entire thematic narrative a jumbled, broken mess.
<b>Overall:</b>
Don't read this. Don't waste your time. This is the worst book I've ever read.
Review and rating to come.
It's...gonna be an interesting one...
Now, before I get started, I want to make a point: the author clearly had a lot of passion for certain parts of this book. Clearly, she had a story she wanted to tell, and to write and publish a book in general is a great achievement. I'm sure a lot of work went into this.
However, passion and hard work are only parts of what make a good book, and they are, surprisingly, SMALL compared to a dedication to editing, learning, self-awareness, and a willingness to improve.
Passion and hard work were not enough, and it feels to me like they are all this book has going for it. The nicest thing I can say about it is that it is clear this was written by a human and not AI.
To call this a one-star read is an insult to other one-star books I have read. In fact, if I could give it negative stars, I would. If I owned this physically, I would not give it away or inflict it upon a thrift shop or used book store, I would burn it.
Call me dramatic, but this entire experience left me awed at how bafflingly bad a book could be. Normally if I come across a self-published book that is very bad I won't rate it or I won't finish it, but there are reasons for all of this hubbub this time around, and some VERY particular things in this book that, to me, warrant a scathing review regardless of its circumstances of publication.
Now, like many other reviewers here I read this for the promise of money from a review site. I was getting endless emails about a "limited time offer" (which went on for months, apparently) to get paid a nice amount of money for reviewing the book. Seeing the book and its ratings, I wasn't too interested.
Then they raised the payment, so I finally bit.
I have not been paid. Technically, there are steps I could go through to get me <i>closer</i> to being paid, but after seeing several people here say that their reviews got rejected and payment was not given because they rated the book negatively (and my initial review for it was rejected for reasons that honestly seemed like extreme nitpicks to me, considering they have sent me emails rife with grammatical errors themselves), I don't want to waste my time jumping through hoops and likely not being paid in the end, regardless.
So here I am. On Goodreads. Ready to tell you all about the single worst book I've ever read.
In detail. With spoilers. No, I'm not marking them. Don't read this book. Don't do it.
Also, I'm going to need to tackle this in categories. So, let's get into:
<b>The Writing:</b>
Let's get the technical problems out of the way first.
There were actual sentences, paragraphs, and transition scenes missing in this book. I wish I was joking, but the amount of times that things would happen out of nowhere, characters would abruptly change topic of conversation with no hint of a segue, and there were literal transition scenes and sentences missing was INSANE. Characters were referenced who never showed up previously, there were long historical and descriptive rambles that added nothing to the story or atmosphere and simply destroyed the pacing, and the characters were kept at such an arm's length from the reader that it was impossible to have any emotional investment in them. <i>In a book marketed as a historical romance.</i>
On a note of the long rambles, there were also completely uncalled-for rambles describing medical things that felt like they were pulled straight out of a wikipedia article...<i>such as a lengthy description on how breastfeeding works, given from a nurse to Vanessa when she gave birth. It was literally an entire page on the ebook. That's about a third to a half of a page in print, which is TOO MUCH DESCRIPTION OF HOW BREASTFEEDING WORKS.</i>
There were also several grammatical and spelling errors that compounded the issue, making everything worse. I'm sure I missed some of them while reading, since I was so distracted by the disjointed prose.
I highly doubt this book was edited by a professional. Honestly, I would be surprised if the author even self-edited it or used beta readers. It reads like a very, VERY rough first draft.
<b>The Plot:</b>
What plot?
Tell me, is the plot here in the room with us?
Is the plot anything more than a jumbled, chopped-up mess of attempted thematic ramblings?
No?
The basic description is that it's about a white-passing black woman living in the south. (Even though she's in California for most of the book.)
But no, it isn't, it's about her white friend working in media.
But no, it isn't, it's about a nun who won't shut up about the civil war.
But no, it isn't, because it's about...marital abuse?
Ahh, maybe it's about the abrupt murder plot that has motivations that fall apart at the barest touch of scrutiny and tie back to the themes of racism that were missing through most of the book and only showed up when it was convenient for the author. (The entire murder plot, by the way, happened in the last forty or so pages, and followed completely random detectives that had never shown up previously in the book.)
What is this book about? The life and times of a woman with all the personality of a plank of wood that has a hole drilled into it.
That description is important. Let's get into...
<b>Characters:</b>
Our leading plank of wood is named Vanessa.
She's beautiful. Everyone lusts after her. She has all the backbone of a jelly fish and all the personality of a limp noodle. The only trait I can confidently say about her is that she's a workaholic (which gets abandoned the second she has a child which, though fair, did remove the only character trait she had outside of crying at the drop of a hat and being as passive as a leaf caught in a river).
She is so passive, in fact, that she managed to make the sex scenes between her and the man she allegedly love COME OFF AS MORE RAPEY THAN ACTUAL SCENES OF SEXUAL ASSAULT THAT I HAVE READ.
But oh, I get ahead of myself.
The love interest is a dude named Barry.
Barry is a trash fire of a human being. He had no redeeming qualities whatsoever. I do not buy his alleged "love" of the main character, and he had all the charm of a rabid dog. I hated him.
Trisha is the white friend. Trisha is annoying and inconsistent. That's all I can say about her.
Sister Roe is a history-obsessed nun that interjected random historical facts into every single conversation, no matter how irrelevant. She had no charm, and was insufferable on every page she was on.
Tod is the trash-bag husband of Vanessa. He sucked too, and yet I only hated him as much as I hated Barry, not more. That's not a great look for comparing the hero and villain of a story, when they are equally awful.
The other characters were all so bland and meaningless that they aren't worth talking about, so let's get into...
<b>The "Romance":</b>
This is the least romantic thing I've ever read, and it all boils down to the utter passivity of Vanessa.
You know how I called her a plank of wood with a hole drilled through? There's a reason for that.
There is not a single scene in this book--either between her and her "true love" Barry or her abusive husband (even pre-abuse)--that doesn't come off as sexual assault.
NOT EVEN ONCE does she initiate or show interest in even kissing either of these men--it's always them suddenly shoving their tongue down her throat and having their way with her. She is never described as kissing them back, and during the extremely unpleasant sex scenes she is never shown to do anything more than lying there and taking it, regardless of who her partner is. (The only times when she is described as doing something is when she's coerced into giving her "true love" a guided hand job and the second when her abusive husband forces her to give him a BJ).
A lot of this is due to the distance the narrative has with her in particular. The scenes are extremely clinical and distant, with no sense of emotion. Even in the scene where she LOSES HER VIRGINITY, we don't know what she feels about it. (A scene where her "true love" boyfriend literally coerces her into sex after she says no, saying, AND I QUOTE: "If you really love me, you'll do this for me.") The only thing we know that she feels about it is that she was a bit uncomfortable and cried the entire time, but since she cries every other page her tears really didn't mean much aside from making the scene come off as even more rapey.
Forgive my crass language, but this really is the worst side of this book, and it's important to get across just how bad it is, especially as it is a big part of why I feel the need to be so harsh on it.
The real kick in the teeth is that the book desperately wants to audience to believe that Barry--manipulative, CHEATING, Barry--and plank-of-wood Vanessa are madly in love with one another and destined to be together. We're supposed to cheer for these two.
The story literally ends with Vanessa sweeping into his hospital room after he got stabbed while trying to help her with a problem (long, convoluted, stupid plot there), and she cries (what a shock) while confessing her undying love for him.
...all the while, her best friend (white girl Trisha) is also hospitalized, fighting for her life after she was poisoned by a doctor who was trying to kill Barry, and she sacrificed herself to save him. Trisha, who literally has been the only loyal friend she's had her entire life.
We don't find out what happens to Trisha. Last thing we see of her, she's getting poisoned. Maybe she lives, maybe not. Who knows?
(On a side note, when I described this ending plotline to my husband, he said it sounded like a bad soap opera. I agree.)
And, since it's so pertinent to the characters, let's talk about...
<b>Inconsistency:</b>
There was not a single character who was consistent throughout their entire storyline. Either the narrative told us they were one thing while they acted the opposite, or they actually broke previous characterization.
Sister Roe was supposed to be a mother to Vanessa, yet wasn't even remotely upset at Barry when he cheated on her. (Barry's father, by the way, also seemed uncharacteristically aloof about the whole issue. Nobody who should have been upset was upset aside from Vanessa.)
While some of Tod's broken character was explained away, none of it explains why he went from fairly chill to MURDEROUSLY RACIST without even a sign of his racism brought up earlier. I feel like if someone's willing to kill his own wife for being black, at least a comment or something would have been brought up over the years of them knowing one another. It was completely out of the blue.
The worst for it, however, was Vanessa.
One moment she's the meekest, most spineless person on earth, the next we're supposed to believe she's a hardcore feminist standing up to the Man and being the Best Reporter Ever.
One moment she's sleeping with her fiance, the next she's an inexperienced virgin on their wedding night.
One moment she's pregnant out of wedlock and immediately has an abortion without a second thought (in the 60's, no less), the next she's a devout Catholic who can't abide the idea of divorcing her abusive husband and is demanding to be married in a Catholic church.
One moment she's so traumatized by the abortion that she can't stand the idea of having sex because she fears pregnancy, the next she's totally fine with having kids and giving up her career for motherhood.
None of these things go together. She wasn't a character, she was a McGuffin to get across whatever point the author was trying to make.
And on the final, most important point, let's address...
<b>Themes:</b>
This is a "theme" book. By which, I mean it is a book that wants to tackle heavy subjects.
This also commits the cardinal sin of "theme" books: trying to tackle too much, and failing to do any of the issues justice.
It wants to tackle racism, and abusive relationships, and abortion (in the most disgusting, pointless, awful scene in the book that was over-graphic, excessive, and felt exploitative, by the way. It felt like it was there for shock value and nothing else. It made me viscerally angry, and I ended up skimming it to get it over with). It wants to tackle being an orphan, being a white-passing black woman, navigating a male-dominated career as a woman, grief...etc;...etc;...the list goes on.
This is too much, and all of them were tackled with the delicacy of a child wielding a hammer.
There was no focus. There was no consistency. In the attempt to cover every Big Issue possible, none of them were given the depth or attention required, leaving the entire thematic narrative a jumbled, broken mess.
<b>Overall:</b>
Don't read this. Don't waste your time. This is the worst book I've ever read.
Review and rating to come.
It's...gonna be an interesting one...
Content Warnings
Graphic: Racial slurs, Racism, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Medical trauma, Abortion, Sexual harassment
