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3.9 AVERAGE
3.9 AVERAGE
I dearly loved this book in my teens, I even re-read it when I was out of my teens.
This book is wonderful! It is my second time reading it, and I love it as much as I did when I first read it four years ago. Though Remy and Dexter seem like an impossible pair, you root for them the whole way. Sarah Dessen knows how to make some lovable characters! Humorous, strong, silly. The characters have everything you would want in your own friends. Like your own friends, the reader learns to accept the characters flaws. Which really comes down to what the book is about. Friendship, acceptance, and most of all-faith. Faith that, though everything does not go as planned, life can turn out unexpectedly wonderful.
A cute summer read. Remy got on my nerves quite often, but Dexter made up for it.
Re-read: October 2019
This was so cute!!! I was really worried that I wouldn't love this since I haven't read it since I was 15, but it was phenomenal. Remy and Dexter are so, so great together and I loved reading about their relationship. I really need to read more Sarah Dessen, especially if her other books are similar to this <3
Original Review
This book was so good!
And it was unbelievably cute!
Remy, the MC, is an extremely cynical girl who doesn't believe in true love. Dexter (the adorkable love interest) is a musician who (quite literately) tries to sweep Remy off her feet because he just 'felt a connection between them'. This book tells the story of their unlikely summer romance.
'This Lullaby' is a very character-driven book. While there is certainly a plot, it's the characters that really bring this book to life. Each character seems to be well-rounded and seems to have a purpose. And the interactions between the characters are written so well! For example, when ever Remy is talking to her friends it really seems like she has a real relationship with them and they're not just friends because the author wanted them to be.
If you're looking for a cute contemporary read, I wholeheartedly recommend this!
This was so cute!!! I was really worried that I wouldn't love this since I haven't read it since I was 15, but it was phenomenal. Remy and Dexter are so, so great together and I loved reading about their relationship. I really need to read more Sarah Dessen, especially if her other books are similar to this <3
Original Review
This book was so good!
And it was unbelievably cute!
Remy, the MC, is an extremely cynical girl who doesn't believe in true love. Dexter (the adorkable love interest) is a musician who (quite literately) tries to sweep Remy off her feet because he just 'felt a connection between them'. This book tells the story of their unlikely summer romance.
'This Lullaby' is a very character-driven book. While there is certainly a plot, it's the characters that really bring this book to life. Each character seems to be well-rounded and seems to have a purpose. And the interactions between the characters are written so well! For example, when ever Remy is talking to her friends it really seems like she has a real relationship with them and they're not just friends because the author wanted them to be.
If you're looking for a cute contemporary read, I wholeheartedly recommend this!
I probably last read this book in ~2007. That said, re-reading this book now, so many years later, I could feel the echoes. I saw phrases I use regularly in conversation now. What I'm saying is: I think I read this book many many times as a teenager. 10? More? I don't know. But, like some of my favorite Buffy episodes, I can repeat whole passages from memory.
Remy and I were very similar people as teenagers: Closed off, skeptical of love, wearing our callouses on our sleeves. It's no wonder I basically memorized the book: I was craving a Dexter in my own life; someone who would prove to me that being vulnerable is worth it, that a life lived inwardly isn't fully lived. I am so grateful I grew out of that mentality, and hope Remy did the same.
That said, this book smacks of early aughts in good ways... and also in VERY bad ways. Dexter, the love interest, comes on SO STRONG. She said no, dude. Leave her alone.
When Remy talks to one of Dexter's friends about his pursuit of her:
“Doesn’t matter,” he said, shrugging. “You’re officially a challenge. He’ll never give up now.”
Ew.
He smiled at this, stopping the window with his hand. “I’ll behave,” he said. “I promise.” And then, he started around the front of the car, as if I had said yes, grabbing the picture off my windshield and tucking it into his back pocket. The next thing I knew he was sliding in beside me, settling into the seat, the door swinging shut behind him.
She. said. no. Get out of her car, like, what the fuck.
The worst part about this book is the way Sarah Dessen has her protagonist describe losing her virginity. It sounds an awful lot like rape, and Dessen doesn't touch that with a 10ft pole, which felt wildly inappropriate. If you are going to introduce something like that, you've got to unpack it, otherwise you're just being irresponsible. But, like, that's so 2002, right? Did Dessen even think this scene constituted rape back then? Who the hell knows. Anyway, here's the whole scene, for those of you who are curious:
It was one of Albert’s friends, a really popular senior guy, who I bumped into on the stairs. He’d been flirting with me all night, pulling me into his lap while we played Asshole, and I’d liked it, felt vindicated, like it proved I wasn’t just some stupid sophomore. When he said we should hang out and talk, alone, I knew where we were going and why. Even then, I wasn’t new to this.
We went into Albert’s bedroom and started kissing, there in the dark, as he fumbled for a light switch. Once he found it I could make out a Pink Floyd poster, stacks of CDs, Elle McPher son on the wall with December beneath her. He was easing me back, toward the bed, and then we were lying down, all so quick.
I’d always prided myself on having the upper hand. I had my patented moves, the push offs and casual squirm, easily utilized to slow things down. But this time, they weren’t working. Every time I moved one of his hands another seemed to be on me, and it seemed like all my strength had seeped down to my toes. It didn’t help that I was so drunk that my balance was off, my equilibrium shot. And it had felt so good, for a while.
God. The rest comes in bursts when I do reach that far back, always these crazy sharp details: how fast it was all happening, the way I kept coming in and out of it, one second vivid, the next lost. He was on me and everything was spinning and all I could feel was this weight, heavy, pushing me backward until I feel like Alice, being sucked into the rabbit hole. It was not how I wanted my first time to be.
When it was over, I told him I felt sick and ran for the bathroom, locking the door with my hands shaking, unable at first to perform even that easiest of operations. Then I gripped the sink, gasping hard into it, my own breath coming back at me, amplified, rattling my ears. When I lifted my head up and looked in the mirror, it was her face I saw then. Drunk. Pale. Easy. And scared, unsteady, still gasping as she looked back at me, wondering what she had done.
Are we blaming the victim here? Like, Christ. This is so bad. So, so bad. Especially for a young woman to read, which is who this book is marketed toward.
THE VERY NEXT SCENE after this flashback Remy gets drunk at a bar and this guy is chatting her up and asks her to leave with him (very much condensed for readability):
“I’ll make sure you get home. Come on.” And then he put his hand on my arm, curling his fingers around my elbow.
“Let go”
“Don’t be like that”
“I’m serious,” I told him, jerking my elbow. He held on. “Let go.”
Then he started to tug me off my stool, which normally I would have made more difficult, but again, my balance wasn’t exactly right on just then. Before I knew it I was on my feet, then getting yanked through the crowd.
“I said let go, you fucking asshole!” I pulled my arm loose, hard, and it flew up, smacking him in the face and sending him stumbling... One nasty remark from Chris and I’m bar trash, fighting in public with some guy named Sherman? I could feel the shame rising up in me, flushing my face. Everyone was looking at me.
“Okay, okay, what’s going on here?” That was Adrian, the bouncer
“Crazy bitch. She hit me.”
I was standing there, rubbing my arm, hating myself. I knew if I turned around I’d see that girl again, so weak and screwed up. She’d go to the parking lot, no problem. After that night at the party, she’d gotten a reputation for it. I hated her for that. So much I could feel a lump rising in my throat, which I pressed down because I was better than that, much better. I wasn’t Lissa: I didn’t trot my pain out to show around. I kept it better hidden than anyone. I did.
“God, this is swelling,” Sherman whined
“You want me to call the police?” Adrian asked.
“Either I call the cops or I don’t,” Adrian said. “But I got to get back to the door.”
“Forget it,” Sherman told him. “I’m out of here.”
“You.” Adrian pointed at me. “Go home. Now.”
Again, to introduce this scene and not unpack it at all is so insanely irresponsible, and it's scary that I read all this at such an impressionable age. All of the characters, and arguably Dessen herself, seem to be blaming Remy in this scene. It feels so very she asked for it and, like I say, Dessen doesn't unpack these scenes, so how else are we supposed to feel?
I had some experiences in college. A man following me out of the bar and trying to pull me in his direction. A man entering a closed off bedroom where he knew I was passed out, because he wanted to be in there with me passed out. Dessen: I did nothing wrong. I was allowed to talk to that man in the bar without sleeping with him. I was allowed to get drunk and choose to sleep in my friends room without fear. I didn't "deserve" these experiences, and neither did Remey, even in 2002, when women were, apparently, always at fault.
Why the 3 stars, then? This feels like a stinker. Well, despite it all, I still see so much of me in Remy that I can't help but love her and, thus, like this book.
Here are some quotes I actually like from this book, very much informed by my own adolescent experience:
She takes on husbands the way other people change their hair color: out of boredom, listlessness, or just feeling that this next one will fix everything, once and for all.
I’d powered through the last two years with my eyes on one thing, which was getting out. Getting gone... Just me and the future, finally together. Now there was a happy ending I could believe in.
The conquest-getting me alone-was all that mattered, and once he saw me up close I wasn’t so special after all. But I, of course, knew that already.
I didn’t show weakness: I didn’t depend on anyone. And if he’d been like the others, and just let me go, I would have been fine. It would have been easy to go on conveniently forgetting as I kept my heart clenched tight, away from where anyone could get to it.
The past was so sticky, full of land mines: I made it a point, usually, not to be so detailed in the map of myself I handed over to a guy. And the song, that song, was one of the biggest keys to me. Like a soft spot, a bruise that never quite healed right. The first place I was sure they would strike back, when the time came for them to do so.
BE BETTER DESSEN.
Remy and I were very similar people as teenagers: Closed off, skeptical of love, wearing our callouses on our sleeves. It's no wonder I basically memorized the book: I was craving a Dexter in my own life; someone who would prove to me that being vulnerable is worth it, that a life lived inwardly isn't fully lived. I am so grateful I grew out of that mentality, and hope Remy did the same.
That said, this book smacks of early aughts in good ways... and also in VERY bad ways. Dexter, the love interest, comes on SO STRONG. She said no, dude. Leave her alone.
When Remy talks to one of Dexter's friends about his pursuit of her:
“Doesn’t matter,” he said, shrugging. “You’re officially a challenge. He’ll never give up now.”
Ew.
He smiled at this, stopping the window with his hand. “I’ll behave,” he said. “I promise.” And then, he started around the front of the car, as if I had said yes, grabbing the picture off my windshield and tucking it into his back pocket. The next thing I knew he was sliding in beside me, settling into the seat, the door swinging shut behind him.
She. said. no. Get out of her car, like, what the fuck.
The worst part about this book is the way Sarah Dessen has her protagonist describe losing her virginity. It sounds an awful lot like rape, and Dessen doesn't touch that with a 10ft pole, which felt wildly inappropriate. If you are going to introduce something like that, you've got to unpack it, otherwise you're just being irresponsible. But, like, that's so 2002, right? Did Dessen even think this scene constituted rape back then? Who the hell knows. Anyway, here's the whole scene, for those of you who are curious:
Spoiler
That was the first night I ever got really drunk. It was a bad start with the cherry brandy, and an hour later I found myself making my way across Albert’s living room, clutching an easy chair for support. Everything was spinning, and I could see Lissa and Chloe and Jess sitting on a couch in the living room, where some girl was teaching them how to play quarters. The music was really loud, and someone had broken a vase in the foyer. It was blue, and the pieces were still scattered everywhere, strewn across the lime carpet. I remember thinking, in my blurry state, that it looked like sea glass.It was one of Albert’s friends, a really popular senior guy, who I bumped into on the stairs. He’d been flirting with me all night, pulling me into his lap while we played Asshole, and I’d liked it, felt vindicated, like it proved I wasn’t just some stupid sophomore. When he said we should hang out and talk, alone, I knew where we were going and why. Even then, I wasn’t new to this.
We went into Albert’s bedroom and started kissing, there in the dark, as he fumbled for a light switch. Once he found it I could make out a Pink Floyd poster, stacks of CDs, Elle McPher son on the wall with December beneath her. He was easing me back, toward the bed, and then we were lying down, all so quick.
I’d always prided myself on having the upper hand. I had my patented moves, the push offs and casual squirm, easily utilized to slow things down. But this time, they weren’t working. Every time I moved one of his hands another seemed to be on me, and it seemed like all my strength had seeped down to my toes. It didn’t help that I was so drunk that my balance was off, my equilibrium shot. And it had felt so good, for a while.
God. The rest comes in bursts when I do reach that far back, always these crazy sharp details: how fast it was all happening, the way I kept coming in and out of it, one second vivid, the next lost. He was on me and everything was spinning and all I could feel was this weight, heavy, pushing me backward until I feel like Alice, being sucked into the rabbit hole. It was not how I wanted my first time to be.
When it was over, I told him I felt sick and ran for the bathroom, locking the door with my hands shaking, unable at first to perform even that easiest of operations. Then I gripped the sink, gasping hard into it, my own breath coming back at me, amplified, rattling my ears. When I lifted my head up and looked in the mirror, it was her face I saw then. Drunk. Pale. Easy. And scared, unsteady, still gasping as she looked back at me, wondering what she had done.
Are we blaming the victim here? Like, Christ. This is so bad. So, so bad. Especially for a young woman to read, which is who this book is marketed toward.
THE VERY NEXT SCENE after this flashback Remy gets drunk at a bar and this guy is chatting her up and asks her to leave with him (very much condensed for readability):
“I’ll make sure you get home. Come on.” And then he put his hand on my arm, curling his fingers around my elbow.
“Let go”
“Don’t be like that”
“I’m serious,” I told him, jerking my elbow. He held on. “Let go.”
Then he started to tug me off my stool, which normally I would have made more difficult, but again, my balance wasn’t exactly right on just then. Before I knew it I was on my feet, then getting yanked through the crowd.
“I said let go, you fucking asshole!” I pulled my arm loose, hard, and it flew up, smacking him in the face and sending him stumbling... One nasty remark from Chris and I’m bar trash, fighting in public with some guy named Sherman? I could feel the shame rising up in me, flushing my face. Everyone was looking at me.
“Okay, okay, what’s going on here?” That was Adrian, the bouncer
“Crazy bitch. She hit me.”
I was standing there, rubbing my arm, hating myself. I knew if I turned around I’d see that girl again, so weak and screwed up. She’d go to the parking lot, no problem. After that night at the party, she’d gotten a reputation for it. I hated her for that. So much I could feel a lump rising in my throat, which I pressed down because I was better than that, much better. I wasn’t Lissa: I didn’t trot my pain out to show around. I kept it better hidden than anyone. I did.
“God, this is swelling,” Sherman whined
“You want me to call the police?” Adrian asked.
“Either I call the cops or I don’t,” Adrian said. “But I got to get back to the door.”
“Forget it,” Sherman told him. “I’m out of here.”
“You.” Adrian pointed at me. “Go home. Now.”
Again, to introduce this scene and not unpack it at all is so insanely irresponsible, and it's scary that I read all this at such an impressionable age. All of the characters, and arguably Dessen herself, seem to be blaming Remy in this scene. It feels so very she asked for it and, like I say, Dessen doesn't unpack these scenes, so how else are we supposed to feel?
I had some experiences in college. A man following me out of the bar and trying to pull me in his direction. A man entering a closed off bedroom where he knew I was passed out, because he wanted to be in there with me passed out. Dessen: I did nothing wrong. I was allowed to talk to that man in the bar without sleeping with him. I was allowed to get drunk and choose to sleep in my friends room without fear. I didn't "deserve" these experiences, and neither did Remey, even in 2002, when women were, apparently, always at fault.
Why the 3 stars, then? This feels like a stinker. Well, despite it all, I still see so much of me in Remy that I can't help but love her and, thus, like this book.
Here are some quotes I actually like from this book, very much informed by my own adolescent experience:
She takes on husbands the way other people change their hair color: out of boredom, listlessness, or just feeling that this next one will fix everything, once and for all.
I’d powered through the last two years with my eyes on one thing, which was getting out. Getting gone... Just me and the future, finally together. Now there was a happy ending I could believe in.
The conquest-getting me alone-was all that mattered, and once he saw me up close I wasn’t so special after all. But I, of course, knew that already.
I didn’t show weakness: I didn’t depend on anyone. And if he’d been like the others, and just let me go, I would have been fine. It would have been easy to go on conveniently forgetting as I kept my heart clenched tight, away from where anyone could get to it.
The past was so sticky, full of land mines: I made it a point, usually, not to be so detailed in the map of myself I handed over to a guy. And the song, that song, was one of the biggest keys to me. Like a soft spot, a bruise that never quite healed right. The first place I was sure they would strike back, when the time came for them to do so.
BE BETTER DESSEN.
Sarah Dessen writes great YA, can't argue that, but it did feel just a little formulaic (tough girl who will never crack, inevitably cracks for the understanding, goofy, supportive boy). I also read this almost right after reading Dreamland, which didn't feel formulaic at all, and was just unique and dark enough to really win me over.
Though, I loved Remy, I did. Responsible and bitter and beautiful. And I loved Dexter. Of course. I just felt like I've read parts of this book before.
A shout out, though, to Remy's friendships. I sometimes feel like friends are an afterthought in these kinds of books -- plot devices more than anything -- and these girls instead felt like natural parts of Remy's story.
Though, I loved Remy, I did. Responsible and bitter and beautiful. And I loved Dexter. Of course. I just felt like I've read parts of this book before.
A shout out, though, to Remy's friendships. I sometimes feel like friends are an afterthought in these kinds of books -- plot devices more than anything -- and these girls instead felt like natural parts of Remy's story.
I actually got cind of disapointed when i was done Reading this book yaeh ofcourse ut was Good but i had expected something else something more... 'sparkey'.
And sometimes while i was reading i got bored...
But other than that it was a good book
And sometimes while i was reading i got bored...
But other than that it was a good book
I liked the storyline. I love the authors style. But the story was predictable, and the character choice was just very confusing. I found myself getting annoyed at how they were portrayed, forgetting that this was a book of teenagers. Plus I wish we delved more into why characters were how they were. I feel we got minimal information about the just to know their personality, but I wanted more.
I love Sarah Dessen, have since I picked up The Truth About Forever. And as normal for me, when I find an author I like; I search out just about every book they have written. This Lullaby has been sitting in my TBR pile for a few months now, and I figured since there were no need to read books waiting, now would be a perfect time to read it.
I loved Remy and Dexter, I knew from the first moment they met in her soon to be step-father's dealership that he would be the one she tossed all her rules out the window for. And truthfully; I never did trust Don as far as I could throw him, lol. He just seemed almost too good to be true, and you all know those types. The story behind Remy's distrust of love is one that I am sure a lot of teenagers and even adults can relate to. I know that for me, it was hard to trust in real love for the longest time, just because I had step-mothers coming in and out of my life at an amazing rate when I was younger, but like Remy I found that one person who made me see things in a different light.
I would have liked to see more of what Dexter was thinking throughout the book, but seeing as this was all from Remy's point of view I understand. And Ted, was just too much for me, though I am sure that is one of him in just about every band. Overall this was a great book, one that I am sure I will come back to again and again.
I loved Remy and Dexter, I knew from the first moment they met in her soon to be step-father's dealership that he would be the one she tossed all her rules out the window for. And truthfully; I never did trust Don as far as I could throw him, lol. He just seemed almost too good to be true, and you all know those types. The story behind Remy's distrust of love is one that I am sure a lot of teenagers and even adults can relate to. I know that for me, it was hard to trust in real love for the longest time, just because I had step-mothers coming in and out of my life at an amazing rate when I was younger, but like Remy I found that one person who made me see things in a different light.
I would have liked to see more of what Dexter was thinking throughout the book, but seeing as this was all from Remy's point of view I understand. And Ted, was just too much for me, though I am sure that is one of him in just about every band. Overall this was a great book, one that I am sure I will come back to again and again.
I'm usually a little bit meh on Sarah Dessen's books, but this one actually got me!