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debsep's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
sad
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual assault, Abandonment, Suicidal thoughts, Child death, Domestic abuse, Toxic relationship, and Violence
caitlin_d89's review
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? N/A
4.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Toxic relationship
Moderate: Emotional abuse, Abandonment, Physical abuse, Domestic abuse, and Gaslighting
Minor: Sexual assault and Infidelity
e_milyking's review
challenging
emotional
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.0
I personally didn’t enjoy this book, I think it’s important to touch on themes of domestic violence carefully and this didn’t feel like a careful book. I thought that some of the plot and internal dialogue painted a good picture of the realities of domestic violence, and some provided excuses for the perpetrator. I appreciated that it came from a lived experience perspective, but I think it’s potentially damaging to market this book as a ‘romantic triangle’ to young audiences and have the ending not provide any sense of actual justice. The writing was good and easy to read, but the character development was a bit undercooked and the concepts felt half-baked. Also why was a minor-adult relationship in there???? And he was meant to be the good guy???? I don’t like what messages it portrayed at times, overall the thread of ending the cycle of violence is great but it could’ve been done a LOT better. Could rant about this book at length clearly
Content Warnings
Graphic: Domestic abuse
Moderate: Toxic relationship, Adult/minor relationship, Abandonment, and Rape
rad_reads_123's review against another edition
emotional
funny
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Medical trauma, Domestic abuse, and Injury/Injury detail
Moderate: Rape, Pregnancy, Toxic relationship, Abandonment, Sexual content, Sexual violence, and Physical abuse
Minor: Death of parent
cheruphim's review against another edition
emotional
sad
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
(Reposted from Goodreads)
Finally, I read a Colleen Hoover book.
It Ends With Us is one of those books you hear a lot about, but don't actually -know- what it is about. It centers around a female protagonist named Lily Bloom (the most Fiction Book Female name ever) and her trials and tribulations in Boston, Massachusetts, as she falls for a guy named Ryle Kincaid (also the most Fiction Book Male name ever). Ryle is smart, dashing, and rich, but there's more to him than meets the eye, and more of his inner darkness bubbles to the surface when her childhood crush, Atlas (...no words) enters the picture. What happens is a riveting tale of love, hate, and the oft-mentioned but seldom discussed world of domestic abuse.
Make no mistake, this book involves domestic abuse, specifically of the spousal variety. It was written from Hoover's own personal experiences with it, and I think it is important to keep that in mind when reading this. I think due to the popularity of Hoover's books and her work in general, many walk into this not realizing it's a book about spousal abuse. I do hate how it gets marketed as something airy and romantic, especially towards women and around Valentine's Day. It's not as grim as other books on domestic abuse, something I've seen cited as a flaw in this book, but I think it works in this case. In abusive relationships, it's hard to get a pulse on what you're supposed to actually feel, and the relationship between Ryle and Lily reflects how it can go from 'fun and sexy night' to 'oh god, he hit me. He really hit me', and trying to balance that radical extreme. Much like depression, an abusive relationship isn't grim 100% of the time, and many have a hard time leaving one BECAUSE of the fun and lighthearted moments in between episodes and because they genuinely care about their partner. There is also attempted rape shown twice in this book, so please be advised when reading this book.
I think the relationship between Ryle and Lily is the most well done in this book, as well as the strained relationship between Lily and her mother and the dynamic Ryle's sister Alyssa brings to the table as both his sister and Lily's best friend. It shows how quickly things can change as well as the very real and complicated feelings Lily has for Ryle.
Everything else, on the other hand, feels kind of flat. I didn't really like Atlas, to be honest, because he didn't feel 'real' to me. Out of everyone in this book he felt like a manic pixie dream boy, showing up to be Lily's confidant and 'will-they,won't-they' lover. Unlike Ryle he has few flaws, other than he.. cares about Lily, and was once homeless? He's there just to be the 'right' boyfriend for Lily, and while, yes she deserves someone who cares about her and won't abuse her, that seems to be all there is to his personality. I wish there was more to him other than being the 'dreamy boyfriend that's there to help you escape an abusive relationship' fantasy. He was homeless at one point! I had brushes with poverty in my lifetime, along with family that has had brushes with poverty, and that does change you in a way. It makes you paranoid about your finances, or overindulgent and selfish, but for Atlas it didn't seem to affect him much as an adult other than being a sad part of his backstory. I wish the book expounded more on that, and well, at least gave him some sort of flaw.
Also while I love how real and candid this book feels about domestic abuse, it does falls on some domestic abuse tropes in media. Lily's father is cruel and abusive.. and that's it. He beats and sexually assaults her mom, and even breaks Atlas' nose for being intimate with his daughter. I'm not going to lie, I wish the book revealed more about him. For a nuanced take on domestic abuse, Lily's father is nothing more than a caricature on the abusive husband trope, and I wish there was more to him. Like did he have an anger management problem or undiagnosed mental illness? Did he himself have abusive parents growing up? We learn about Ryle and his issues, but is there nothing to be said about Lily's father? And how did beating a homeless teenager to a pulp get overlooked so easily, even if he was a powerful figure in a small town in Maine? His death is a huge catalyst to the start of this book and where Lily winds up, and I would have much rather learned more about him than some of the other material brought up in this book.
I also want to bring up something else: this book was written in 2016. I say that because a sizeable chunk of this book is Lily being a teenager and writing in her diary to Ellen Degeneres. This was long before the stories of Degeneres' cruelty towards her staff came out in 2020, and was also at the peak of her popularity. It gets overbearing at times, and the mantra 'just keep swimming' from Finding Nemo's Dory feels like something from a corny Disney mom, but I want to bring that up because I've seen reviews where people asked how Hoover could idolize Ellen like that after all she did. Well, it was written in 2016, and much of the talk surrounding her abusive behavior was limited to the Los Angeles/Hollywood film scene before it all came to light. I kind of like the touch of a kid writing to a talk show celebrity, even if the Ellen worship makes you cringe now. It also adds a sort of black humor irony to it now, seeing as how Lily was surrounded by domestic abuse, and one of her means of escape was indulging in a show that was.. also hosted by an abusive person.
Another thing I saw criticism of this book for was the ending, in which Lily breaks up with Ryle shortly after the birth of their daughter, Emerson. Many criticized it because it didn't involve Lily calling the cops or doing something drastic to exact 'revenge' on Ryle, but to me it made sense. She still loved Ryle somewhere deep down, and while she loathed him for literally being abusive, I can see why she didn't want to get law enforcement involved. Cops can be unpredicatable in domestic situations, as well as perpetrators of domestic violence in itself, and I can see why she did what she did. It felt realistic in a way, and I liked that extra touch.
This book also suffers from mid-late 2010s 'quirky' young adult writing, but, seeing as how it does come from that time period, I'll let that slide a little bit. I'm not a big fan of that writing style, but again, it did come out in 2016, so I'm not going to harp on that too much.
In conclusion, I think this book has merits, and the hate/love that this book gets is overblown, and more feels like a reaction to Colleen Hoover's mega-status rather than the book itself. It has emotional candidness that can be appreciated, regardless of where you come from, and even in its YA-esque writing style, Ellen stannery, and archetypical characters, there's something to be appreciated in this book. If you're curious to see what the fuss is about, I recommend it to the ones intrigued. Just keep in mind that it IS a book about abuse, and not strictly a romance book. (less)
Finally, I read a Colleen Hoover book.
It Ends With Us is one of those books you hear a lot about, but don't actually -know- what it is about. It centers around a female protagonist named Lily Bloom (the most Fiction Book Female name ever) and her trials and tribulations in Boston, Massachusetts, as she falls for a guy named Ryle Kincaid (also the most Fiction Book Male name ever). Ryle is smart, dashing, and rich, but there's more to him than meets the eye, and more of his inner darkness bubbles to the surface when her childhood crush, Atlas (...no words) enters the picture. What happens is a riveting tale of love, hate, and the oft-mentioned but seldom discussed world of domestic abuse.
Make no mistake, this book involves domestic abuse, specifically of the spousal variety. It was written from Hoover's own personal experiences with it, and I think it is important to keep that in mind when reading this. I think due to the popularity of Hoover's books and her work in general, many walk into this not realizing it's a book about spousal abuse. I do hate how it gets marketed as something airy and romantic, especially towards women and around Valentine's Day. It's not as grim as other books on domestic abuse, something I've seen cited as a flaw in this book, but I think it works in this case. In abusive relationships, it's hard to get a pulse on what you're supposed to actually feel, and the relationship between Ryle and Lily reflects how it can go from 'fun and sexy night' to 'oh god, he hit me. He really hit me', and trying to balance that radical extreme. Much like depression, an abusive relationship isn't grim 100% of the time, and many have a hard time leaving one BECAUSE of the fun and lighthearted moments in between episodes and because they genuinely care about their partner. There is also attempted rape shown twice in this book, so please be advised when reading this book.
I think the relationship between Ryle and Lily is the most well done in this book, as well as the strained relationship between Lily and her mother and the dynamic Ryle's sister Alyssa brings to the table as both his sister and Lily's best friend. It shows how quickly things can change as well as the very real and complicated feelings Lily has for Ryle.
Everything else, on the other hand, feels kind of flat. I didn't really like Atlas, to be honest, because he didn't feel 'real' to me. Out of everyone in this book he felt like a manic pixie dream boy, showing up to be Lily's confidant and 'will-they,won't-they' lover. Unlike Ryle he has few flaws, other than he.. cares about Lily, and was once homeless? He's there just to be the 'right' boyfriend for Lily, and while, yes she deserves someone who cares about her and won't abuse her, that seems to be all there is to his personality. I wish there was more to him other than being the 'dreamy boyfriend that's there to help you escape an abusive relationship' fantasy. He was homeless at one point! I had brushes with poverty in my lifetime, along with family that has had brushes with poverty, and that does change you in a way. It makes you paranoid about your finances, or overindulgent and selfish, but for Atlas it didn't seem to affect him much as an adult other than being a sad part of his backstory. I wish the book expounded more on that, and well, at least gave him some sort of flaw.
Also while I love how real and candid this book feels about domestic abuse, it does falls on some domestic abuse tropes in media. Lily's father is cruel and abusive.. and that's it. He beats and sexually assaults her mom, and even breaks Atlas' nose for being intimate with his daughter. I'm not going to lie, I wish the book revealed more about him. For a nuanced take on domestic abuse, Lily's father is nothing more than a caricature on the abusive husband trope, and I wish there was more to him. Like did he have an anger management problem or undiagnosed mental illness? Did he himself have abusive parents growing up? We learn about Ryle and his issues, but is there nothing to be said about Lily's father? And how did beating a homeless teenager to a pulp get overlooked so easily, even if he was a powerful figure in a small town in Maine? His death is a huge catalyst to the start of this book and where Lily winds up, and I would have much rather learned more about him than some of the other material brought up in this book.
I also want to bring up something else: this book was written in 2016. I say that because a sizeable chunk of this book is Lily being a teenager and writing in her diary to Ellen Degeneres. This was long before the stories of Degeneres' cruelty towards her staff came out in 2020, and was also at the peak of her popularity. It gets overbearing at times, and the mantra 'just keep swimming' from Finding Nemo's Dory feels like something from a corny Disney mom, but I want to bring that up because I've seen reviews where people asked how Hoover could idolize Ellen like that after all she did. Well, it was written in 2016, and much of the talk surrounding her abusive behavior was limited to the Los Angeles/Hollywood film scene before it all came to light. I kind of like the touch of a kid writing to a talk show celebrity, even if the Ellen worship makes you cringe now. It also adds a sort of black humor irony to it now, seeing as how Lily was surrounded by domestic abuse, and one of her means of escape was indulging in a show that was.. also hosted by an abusive person.
Another thing I saw criticism of this book for was the ending, in which Lily breaks up with Ryle shortly after the birth of their daughter, Emerson. Many criticized it because it didn't involve Lily calling the cops or doing something drastic to exact 'revenge' on Ryle, but to me it made sense. She still loved Ryle somewhere deep down, and while she loathed him for literally being abusive, I can see why she didn't want to get law enforcement involved. Cops can be unpredicatable in domestic situations, as well as perpetrators of domestic violence in itself, and I can see why she did what she did. It felt realistic in a way, and I liked that extra touch.
This book also suffers from mid-late 2010s 'quirky' young adult writing, but, seeing as how it does come from that time period, I'll let that slide a little bit. I'm not a big fan of that writing style, but again, it did come out in 2016, so I'm not going to harp on that too much.
In conclusion, I think this book has merits, and the hate/love that this book gets is overblown, and more feels like a reaction to Colleen Hoover's mega-status rather than the book itself. It has emotional candidness that can be appreciated, regardless of where you come from, and even in its YA-esque writing style, Ellen stannery, and archetypical characters, there's something to be appreciated in this book. If you're curious to see what the fuss is about, I recommend it to the ones intrigued. Just keep in mind that it IS a book about abuse, and not strictly a romance book. (less)
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual content, Rape, Domestic abuse, Panic attacks/disorders, Grief, and Toxic relationship
Moderate: Child death, Suicide attempt, Abandonment, and Child abuse
water_melin's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Domestic abuse and Physical abuse
Minor: Suicide attempt, Rape, and Abandonment
leah_pants's review
This is the prequel to It begins with us. I finally arrived to the scene where the main character gets slapped after laughing about a dropped casserole dish. I just couldn't bring myself to keep going.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Rape, Sexual assault, and Domestic abuse
Moderate: Child abuse and Abandonment
enchantingreads_rosyreviews's review
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
"Cycles exist because they are excruciating to break. It takes an astronomical amount of pain and courage to disrupt a familiar pattern."
My first CoHo book and it was a DOOZY, but I loved it! My family has a history of domestic violence survival and this book felt like a celebration to other survivors and their loved ones. The amount of strength Lily and others like her must find within themselves is awe-inspiring.
Hoover wrote a raw, grounded and realistic portrayal of an all-too-common situation. Watching Lily’s personal growth, especially when she is in conflict with herself, and wracking with the morally grey areas life forces us to face, are two elements which make this story uniquely captivating. This book is guaranteed to stay with you. This book was emotional, empowering, devastating, and left me conflicted at times. But all of these things are what make life beautiful. Without the tough times, the great ones are a little less shiny. I can't wait for the movie adaptation of this book!
When I tell you, this book grabbed hold of me and didn’t let go, I MEAN it! This is not some lovey-dovey romance book where they run off into the sunset together and live happily ever after. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t pick it up! Instead, this is a grounded, authentic story which brings new meaning to the phrase “every rose has its thorns.”
"15 seconds. That's all it takes to completely change everything about a person. 15 seconds that we'll never get back."
Content Warnings
Graphic: Domestic abuse, Toxic relationship, Emotional abuse, Panic attacks/disorders, and Alcoholism
Moderate: Sexual assault, Child abuse, Gaslighting, Physical abuse, Pregnancy, and Sexual content
Minor: Suicidal thoughts, Gun violence, Abandonment, Bullying, Cursing, Grief, Child death, Death of parent, Rape, and Self harm
readingwithel's review
emotional
hopeful
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.25
oh my days my poor lily. This book was so so sad I cried buckets for lily. I yelled at Ryle through the pages and screamed ”YES LILY” when she finally left him I read this book in 4 days I loved it. I think writing about such a sensitive topic was done in a really good and respectful way. I can’t stop thinking about this book
Content Warnings
Graphic: Domestic abuse and Rape
Moderate: Abandonment
sarahasperger's review
emotional
hopeful
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child death, Sexual violence, Alcohol, Mental illness, Sexual content, Death, Emotional abuse, Physical abuse, Sexual harassment, and Sexual assault
Moderate: Rape, Cancer, and Death of parent
Minor: Suicidal thoughts, Abandonment, Panic attacks/disorders, Self harm, and Vomit