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informative
medium-paced
informative
medium-paced
challenging
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
sad
slow-paced
A must read for any white people considering transracial adoption or who are currently the family member of a transracial adoptee should; would have loved some content specifically for white siblings of transracial adoptees
challenging
emotional
informative
sad
fast-paced
Everyone should read this book. This is not just for adoptive, foster, or prospective parents. This book gives a great perspective on the child services system along with the reasons why a child might end up in the system that is relevant to everyone.
Wonderful read that is filled with personal stories, questions for reflection, examples, and a large resource library that I plan to utilize when continuing my education on adoption. What was one of the most powerful things was how Melissa wove her story throughout all of the chapters, as it shows a “real life” that encapsulates not only a story but the thoughts and feelings that came with these experiences. For those who doubt her voice, Melissa also holds a wealth of knowledge, and the more factual chapters include many references from studies, books, news articles, and more. I found the book to be a perfect length to recommend while also including the hard questions and thoughts that are more likely to be present in books twice its size.
The only section I struggled with is the section on terminology and word choices in adoption. I don’t blame Melissa for this, however, as it really is a preference thing. I just struggle with word choice as someone who is extremely anxious about screwing up.
My favorite section was actually the last two pages, with the adoptive parent promise and the bill of rights for transracial adoptees. I love Angela Tucker’s adoptee bill of rights too, and I think both are so valuable for children who have been adopted.
Thank you, Melissa, for your work. This is definitely a book I will be recommending to families personally and professionally.
The only section I struggled with is the section on terminology and word choices in adoption. I don’t blame Melissa for this, however, as it really is a preference thing. I just struggle with word choice as someone who is extremely anxious about screwing up.
My favorite section was actually the last two pages, with the adoptive parent promise and the bill of rights for transracial adoptees. I love Angela Tucker’s adoptee bill of rights too, and I think both are so valuable for children who have been adopted.
Thank you, Melissa, for your work. This is definitely a book I will be recommending to families personally and professionally.
Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC of this book, which I was so stoked to receive!
Adoption is a much more complicated topic than people realize, and the best thing a potential adoptive parent can do is self-reflect about their own lives and grow from their struggles so that they can parent their children to the best of their ability. I often recommend Melissa's first book, What White Parents Should Know About Transracial Adoption, to families because of her ability to integrate the history of adoption, her personal history and emotions, and challenging questions to adoptive families seamlessly. While I think that this book goes best when paired with the original book, I still found a lot of value in it and have started integrating some of the questions Melissa poses into my work.
My favorite parts of this workbook involved when Melissa integrated real-world examples and websites that families could consult. Words matter, and by including these examples, Melissa clearly showed why our words should be heavily considered when talking about adoption. I also greatly appreciated the section that involved questions that people should ask their agencies, as I would much prefer that people pursue adoption in the most ethical ways possible instead of simply doing whatever will be fastest/easiest for growing their families. Finally, I hugely appreciated the resource list. I trust Melissa's judgement and have added these resources to my own list so I can learn from more adoptee, former foster youth, and first family voices.
My biggest complaint is that this book is advertised as one that families can consult no matter how they adopted their children. I think that the book holds value for all adoptive families; however, it seems most effective as a resource for those who adopted privately (domestic or international). The reason for this is largely due to the fact that Melissa's worldview is through the lens of a transnational, transcultural adoptee. Again, I think there is still benefit to completing the workbook, but adoptive families should make sure to supplement their education with the voices of former foster youth.
Thank you again to NetGalley, North Atlantic Books, and Melissa Guida-Richards for the ARC copy of this workbook.
Adoption is a much more complicated topic than people realize, and the best thing a potential adoptive parent can do is self-reflect about their own lives and grow from their struggles so that they can parent their children to the best of their ability. I often recommend Melissa's first book, What White Parents Should Know About Transracial Adoption, to families because of her ability to integrate the history of adoption, her personal history and emotions, and challenging questions to adoptive families seamlessly. While I think that this book goes best when paired with the original book, I still found a lot of value in it and have started integrating some of the questions Melissa poses into my work.
My favorite parts of this workbook involved when Melissa integrated real-world examples and websites that families could consult. Words matter, and by including these examples, Melissa clearly showed why our words should be heavily considered when talking about adoption. I also greatly appreciated the section that involved questions that people should ask their agencies, as I would much prefer that people pursue adoption in the most ethical ways possible instead of simply doing whatever will be fastest/easiest for growing their families. Finally, I hugely appreciated the resource list. I trust Melissa's judgement and have added these resources to my own list so I can learn from more adoptee, former foster youth, and first family voices.
My biggest complaint is that this book is advertised as one that families can consult no matter how they adopted their children. I think that the book holds value for all adoptive families; however, it seems most effective as a resource for those who adopted privately (domestic or international). The reason for this is largely due to the fact that Melissa's worldview is through the lens of a transnational, transcultural adoptee. Again, I think there is still benefit to completing the workbook, but adoptive families should make sure to supplement their education with the voices of former foster youth.
Thank you again to NetGalley, North Atlantic Books, and Melissa Guida-Richards for the ARC copy of this workbook.
medium-paced
A moderately helpful read as my husband and I were on the adoption journey.
challenging
emotional
informative
fast-paced
One of the most important books about race I’ve read. As someone who can’t have biological kids, but wants to be a parent, this book has made me ask a lot of hard questions. I still want to be a parent, but know now that I will have to put in a lot more work, especially if my child is a POC, as I am not.
It has made me want to put in more research into the public vs. private adoption processes and dedicate more time to anti-racism learning. I borrowed this copy from the library, but I will be purchasing my own to work through regularly.
It has made me want to put in more research into the public vs. private adoption processes and dedicate more time to anti-racism learning. I borrowed this copy from the library, but I will be purchasing my own to work through regularly.
As an adoption competent therapist and transracial adoptees myself, I appreciated hearing a different side of adoption that is not often discussed. Of course, as the author mentioned, this is not every adoptees’ experience of adoption. However, as seen in my own work, it is many adoptees’ lived experiences. Unfortunately, many adoptees do not have a space to talk about these complicated thoughts, feelings, and experiences, because they are worried about being “ungrateful” or hurting loved ones. We cannot deny that loss is at the heart of every adoption, so we must validate the stories of adoptees who are navigating this emotional wound in various stages of their life.
This book would likely be best for those just starting to think about adoption. I have followed the author and other adult adoptees on social media for a while, so I was already familiar with many of the themes in the book. I do believe these perspectives are important, but if you’ve been learning from adoptees already, I don’t know that this book will offer too much new information.