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3.98 AVERAGE
3.98 AVERAGE
challenging
emotional
funny
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
I am too dumb for a lot of this book, but I still liked it!
funny
reflective
fast-paced
reads like a joanna newsom album, honestly. wild ride, lots of good lines, lots of toothsome references to ancient texts and classic literature. one of the closer representations of my own experience of transition.
funny
lighthearted
reflective
medium-paced
One thing I did not expect going into this is that I would end up with a crush on Daniel Lavery. The way this man's mind works (fanning myself) is knee-weakening for an intellect-hag like me. This is the single best book I have read about gender transition and it is also one of the most engaging collections of essays on religion and/or pop-culture I have come across. I worship the brain that can go from a mind-bending and hilarious analysis of "The Jerk" to an equally hilarious analysis of Hans Christian Anderson (so unpleasant apparently even Kierkegaard thought him a wet blanket, which is saying a lot), to why Gomez Addams is a transmasculine icon to why Duckie and Captain Kirk are lesbians. At every turn this book is funny. Really funny without being cruel or cutting. And at the same time it is honest and touching and deeply personal without being even slightly sappy.
This is a kind and joyful book, showing neither the anger (say Julia Serano) or conciliatory defeatism (say Kate Bornstein) or obstinate refusal to consider the merit of opinions different from the writer (say Susan Stryker) that I see in many books by gender non-binary and trans authors. Lavery looks for the good in people. He understands the resistance of his mother and other family members to calling him Daniel rather than his dead name. He wants to give them space to "make a mistake" of "forget" as they tell him they will. And though he understands, he also knows this is ridiculous, and uses the story of Jacob/Israel to shine light on that ridiculousness, on the lie of the excuses his mother and others are making. But that light he shines is not mocking, it is filled with a beautiful humanity and empathy, qualities so rare these days that it made me tear up a bit.
I saw GR reviews of this from people who apparently have the intellectual curiosity of a ferret and complained because not every word of this was about transition (actually, every word is filtered through a trans man lens, but perhaps that was too subtle) and also those who complained they were bested by bible references, (as if quoting a bible passage to an atheist were equivalent to plunging a wooden stake into a vampire) and I can safely say they are not the right readers for this book. If you are smart, curious, and want to see Mean Girls and gender and evangelical Christianity a whole lot differently than you ever have before, and do not want anger to be the only acceptable response to everything you see and hear which does not confirm your world view, I recommend this book passionately.
This is a kind and joyful book, showing neither the anger (say Julia Serano) or conciliatory defeatism (say Kate Bornstein) or obstinate refusal to consider the merit of opinions different from the writer (say Susan Stryker) that I see in many books by gender non-binary and trans authors. Lavery looks for the good in people. He understands the resistance of his mother and other family members to calling him Daniel rather than his dead name. He wants to give them space to "make a mistake" of "forget" as they tell him they will. And though he understands, he also knows this is ridiculous, and uses the story of Jacob/Israel to shine light on that ridiculousness, on the lie of the excuses his mother and others are making. But that light he shines is not mocking, it is filled with a beautiful humanity and empathy, qualities so rare these days that it made me tear up a bit.
I saw GR reviews of this from people who apparently have the intellectual curiosity of a ferret and complained because not every word of this was about transition (actually, every word is filtered through a trans man lens, but perhaps that was too subtle) and also those who complained they were bested by bible references, (as if quoting a bible passage to an atheist were equivalent to plunging a wooden stake into a vampire) and I can safely say they are not the right readers for this book. If you are smart, curious, and want to see Mean Girls and gender and evangelical Christianity a whole lot differently than you ever have before, and do not want anger to be the only acceptable response to everything you see and hear which does not confirm your world view, I recommend this book passionately.
The polar opposite of Michelle Obama's memoir, the last book I finished. Messy, self-conscious, inward-looking, challenging, jokey, oblique, self-effacing, ponderous, heady. I feel like I need to bone up on Christian theology and Arthurian legend before returning to this book, which I hope to do.
emotional
funny
hopeful
reflective
sad
medium-paced
An incredible book. I actually had to get a pencil out and make notes in the margins because there was so much I related to. Daniel has a way with words and some great insights into the trans experience.
This was exhausting.
I loved The Toast. And there's a lot of great humor, decent writing, and honest reflection here. But it works better in blog format rather than slogging through them all in a row. The book is less than 250 pages and could've been just fine at half that.
Like, there's entire chapters of undergrad intro lit level Deep Thought movie reviews. Keep it on your substack.
The author is desperate for us to see how clever, and well read, and irreverent he is. For us to please please like him. It's tiresome and kinda sad.
I loved The Toast. And there's a lot of great humor, decent writing, and honest reflection here. But it works better in blog format rather than slogging through them all in a row. The book is less than 250 pages and could've been just fine at half that.
Like, there's entire chapters of undergrad intro lit level Deep Thought movie reviews. Keep it on your substack.
The author is desperate for us to see how clever, and well read, and irreverent he is. For us to please please like him. It's tiresome and kinda sad.
challenging
emotional
reflective
slow-paced