Reviews with content warning for Emotional abuse - Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982

Reviews tagging 'Emotional abuse'

Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982 by Cho Nam-joo

44 reviews

laurareads87's review against another edition

challenging informative reflective sad tense fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? No

4.5

Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982 lives up to the author's intentions to write a work that sparks conversation about Korean women's experiences with sexism and misogyny at home, in school, and at work. The book felt simultaneously very familiar and very infuriating -- I cannot say that I was surprised by the protagonist's experiences as many of them are not dissimilar to my own, yet finishing it I find myself affected nonetheless. The author captures misogyny in all of its everydayness: its manifestations in relationships between partners, strangers, colleagues, the excuses men make to dismiss its existence, and its reproduction by even those who consider themselves progressive. The incorporation of a few footnoted statistics (about gender and employment, wage gaps, etc. in Korea) is highly effective and, I think, is valuable context, particularly for non-Korean readers.

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minzzi's review against another edition

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emotional informative reflective sad fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? No
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

3.75

Oh Girl! This book is small, but punches you right in the guts.
A excruciatinly realistic view of how it is to be a woman in a patriarchal society. And, even thought the story was set in South Korea, with is the other side is the world for me, so much of what happened to Jiyoung also happened to me. It's scary.
As someone who doesn't have/doesn't plan on having children, this book really made me think about the consequences of motherhood and appreciate the woman in my life who are mothers. Just to think about the sacrifices that my grandmothers and my mother had to make in this sexist world makes angry. Also loved the twist in the end. It's sad and infuriating, but realistic and it pulls the hole story together.
Kim Jiyoung is the perfect example of how most woman in their tirthies know how unfair and disgusting society is towards than, but fill pressured by generational trauma to just suck it up so they don't get left behind. Because they know that it doesn't matter what they do or what kinda of woman they choose to be, they are always going to be judged and scrutinized by everyone around than, including other woman. I just wished that the story also focused on other types of woman (queer, single mothers, self-proclaimed feminists, disabled, etc), since Jiyoung clearly represents a specific group of woman. But that is just my personal preference.

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sofidreamer's review against another edition

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challenging emotional hopeful informative inspiring reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? No

4.0

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andra_mihaela_s's review against another edition

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challenging emotional informative reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.5

4.5 stars

I believe this is my first time reading a book from a Korean author, and I gladly say that now I want to read her whole backlist. I'm very much interested in her stories, as she's a journalist.

Cho-Nam-Joo gives us though her main character, Kim Jiyeong, the typical Korean woman born in the early 80's. She's raised to be a reserved, pleasing and complacent woman in a society that believes men/boys must have first bite/place/chance at anything due to them being a future head of a family, a pillar of the comunity.

This is a very touchy subject for women around the world..and those of us who experienced misogyny, sexism, the status of second best will get angry reading about Jiyeong's life.

The book begins with a scene taking place around the time of a very important haliday for Korean culture - the autumn equinox. We see how Jiyeong has different moments in which she's not herself, and how her husband -Jeong Daehyeon is frightened by them. Also in these scenes, we get a clear image how a wife should behave, how the respect to in-laws is above anything else and how one's should respond to tradition.
All these are very important because they give the tone for the whole book!

Coming back to the theme of this novel, the Korean woman and her status in society, I'm very much shocked how many questions raised in these pages also made me think about my country's value of women...I will not deviate because this is about a different experience(and lets face it, few places on Earth have this kind of inequality between sexes) and the data provided is on another level through how late and how superficial changes were implemented.

This book is a clear example why given rights matter only when they are applied and their use is encouraged by society! Here we experience, more than anything else, traditional values vs human appreciation and understanding!

Content warnings: abuse of power, sexism, misogyny, sexual harassment, victim blaming, inequality of chances

After the first part, we go back in time to meet Jiyeong through childhood, adolescence, maturity and marriage. This approach is the best decision the author could have made(in my opinion)! She managed to instil an intriguing premise and a tense atmosphere from the first pages, so that she's follow with an intricate web of lives and choices(or better said: lack of them).

I LOVE the representation of women here! From her mother's quiet yet sly fight to give her girls a better life while maintaining Korean tradition (O Misuk); the older sister (Kim Eunyeong) who is clearly a voice of revolution and feminism; the traditional grandma (Go Sunbun) who's limited view and lack of understanding the problems in society makes a horrible person to follow; to many other women, all different in their experience( school mates, university students, friends, work colleagues and superiors)

Although the best portrayed characters are O Misuk and Kim Jiyeong, I believe this book creates a veritable Korean society in which quite a number of issues are given answers by having multiple women go through life.
And as a real society, we have unfair judgement from others, he have objectification of people and life choices(even if they are imposed on you due to lack of options/opportunity), victim blaming and passive acceptance of sexual harrasment in different scenarios and many more.

Without giving any spoilers, the husband is a good man- as much as he can be living in such a society. He is hard-working and loves Jiyeong, but sometimes, he's lack of real understanding frustrated me like nothing else!>..<
Also, the last section, plays an impotant role in showing us how progress is made, and how flawed it still is using the doctor's life...I guess...it was necessary to ruin our hopes and instil a sense of dismay so that we leave this book convinced we need more change in our world.

When it comes to the flaws of this book: I think a little more character development could have added more to the story, especially in men..but, once again, this story is about women, so I understand it's not exactly what the author prioritized.Other than that, added info about certain events, or a more detailed account of important times in Jiyeong's life whould have being nice.(Like her meeting to someone very important in her life.)

I want to mention that the 2 negative opinions above did not affect my reading experience, and I only mentioned them for possible readers who cannot enjoy books revolving around only a theme and are in need of a more close-up view when it comes to situations happening to the MC. Those readers may not enjoy the novel as much as I did.

Overall, I'm glad I read from Cho Nam-Joo and I cannot wait to see how many Korean authors I will discover in the future!
I highly recommend this, first and foremost, as an informative read, and then as a sad but real study of the condition of women around the world.

Enjoy

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clara_dalstein's review against another edition

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challenging informative reflective medium-paced

5.0

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veganecurrywurst's review against another edition

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challenging emotional informative reflective sad fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.25

Ein wirklich wichtiges und informatives Buch, das Einblick in die stark patriachale und extrem konservative Gesellschaft Koreas gibt. Kein Wunder, dass das Buch so "kontrovers" ist. Kim Jiyoung repräsentiert das Schicksal vieler Frauen in und außerhalb Koreas.

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_fallinglight_'s review

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challenging dark sad tense fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? No
Loveable characters? N/A
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

A distressing, clinically detached look into the life of a college graduate, professional, middle class Korean stay at home mom and how patriarchal and misogynistic Korean gender norms eat away at her mental health starting from infancy to motherhood despite the few gender and societal changes throughout the years, and there's no end to it to other women bc cis men refuse to listen and learn. Very eye opening and sad and no matter how you identity or where you're from you can relate to the anguish felt by Jiyoung when she's bullied by her boy classmate and her pain is dismissed bc according to the teacher “the boy likes her that's why he's mean” to when she's a teenager and creepily followed home by another student. That part really made my stomach clench bc I've been through that myself and it's one of the most terrifying experiences. Honestly at points while you read this book you feel like screaming.

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