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alexatiletile's review against another edition
emotional
informative
sad
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
tashaseegmiller's review against another edition
5.0
Oh, this book will break your heart and then heal it again and then break it again. Lee explores how mental illness impacts a cast of characters, providing insight into what it's like to love someone with mental illness as a sister, a husband, a lover, and even what it is like to have those thoughts that often seem more real than the real ones. It's not wrapped in a nice package at the end, which, I think, is the perfect decision.
biolexicon's review against another edition
5.0
Originally I was sent this book for free from the publisher and they couldn't have happened onto a pickier reviewer when it comes to how mental health issues are depicted (one of the main themes of this book). And I cannot even begin to stress how much this book satisfied my pickiness with flying colors and was such a powerful read overall.
I spent a fair chunk of my life working as a psychiatric nurse aid for indigent people institutionalized from illnesses such as schizophrenia and bipolar disorder (one of the main characters in the book is struggling with symptoms never quite defined by a diagnosis of either of these, but she's given both diagnoses at varying points in time). The way the author portrays this character is true to the behavior that I've seen in patients and the author hits this sweet spot in avoiding "they're just misunderstood" sentiment while also avoiding over-emphasizing "mental illness as disease" to the detriment of looking at how it becomes intertwined with personality such that it becomes difficult to see where one begins and the other ends.
The author also does a solid job of creating lives connected to those with mental illness and not flattening the strengths and mistakes in those lives. We read about the main character's sister helping her navigate mental health care, while also seeing that sister make mistakes in her own life. The relationship between the sisters is strained by mental illness, but also by personality conflicts as well. They're people, with mental illness or without, and with people comes differences and I appreciate the author's representation of that. The same presence of dimension can be said for the men in the main character's romantic life as well.
Some days it seems like there are way too many books (fiction, memoir, non-fiction...take your pick) on the topic of mental illness. A lot of them fall victim to being one-dimensional or narrow in scope. Not this one, it stands out among the crowd.
I spent a fair chunk of my life working as a psychiatric nurse aid for indigent people institutionalized from illnesses such as schizophrenia and bipolar disorder (one of the main characters in the book is struggling with symptoms never quite defined by a diagnosis of either of these, but she's given both diagnoses at varying points in time). The way the author portrays this character is true to the behavior that I've seen in patients and the author hits this sweet spot in avoiding "they're just misunderstood" sentiment while also avoiding over-emphasizing "mental illness as disease" to the detriment of looking at how it becomes intertwined with personality such that it becomes difficult to see where one begins and the other ends.
The author also does a solid job of creating lives connected to those with mental illness and not flattening the strengths and mistakes in those lives. We read about the main character's sister helping her navigate mental health care, while also seeing that sister make mistakes in her own life. The relationship between the sisters is strained by mental illness, but also by personality conflicts as well. They're people, with mental illness or without, and with people comes differences and I appreciate the author's representation of that. The same presence of dimension can be said for the men in the main character's romantic life as well.
Some days it seems like there are way too many books (fiction, memoir, non-fiction...take your pick) on the topic of mental illness. A lot of them fall victim to being one-dimensional or narrow in scope. Not this one, it stands out among the crowd.
jansbookcorner's review against another edition
4.0
A quiet read about mental illness and how it affects not only the person who suffers from it, but those who know and love them. There's a lot packed in to this book and left me with a lot of emotions. Well written and told in the right tone and voice.
safiwi's review
emotional
hopeful
sad
medium-paced
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
purplepierogi's review against another edition
2.0
i have a lot of little complaints but this is my goodreads and I will air them here
- use of the phrase "curled like a shrimp" used no less than three times for same character
- ensemble audiobook narration lent itself to egregious accent changes ("loco Coco" having a Queens accent, then a West African accent when another reader took over?)
- just really bad, grating accents in general, especially for the Ecuadorians
- the use of the word "illegals" and "an illegal" to describe one's husband, which felt out of character to the point of taking one out of the story
- honestly, most of the reason I picked up this book was for the Ecuador setting. well, fear not, in this sections every other word is indeed a name drop! we get references to llapingachos, diminutives like gordito, the city of Cuenca, repeating random basic Spanish words like calle and casita and el campo -- but it all feels a little like an effusive post-study abroad blog post. I know I should go easy on this author; could I write something trying to capture Quito or Cuenca any better, without also resorting to a list of foods and romanticized descriptions? maybe not. and maybe it's intentional to show the shallow wanderlust of our character -- but that didn't stop me from coming away from this wanting to know what 10 week English teaching course our author participated in to know to extoll the expat community for X, Y and Z, and then imply Ecuadorians have never heard of sushi. there is /so/ much sushi in Ecuador! also this is a small nitpick but in Latin America one would not refer to someone from the United States as solely 'an American' and say "in America they do things like that;" Ecuadorians, and many people in Latin America, refer to America as the continents, call themselves Americans, and take offense at the monopoly people from the United States extend over the word.
- on a positive note, the discussion of different perspectives, autonomy, helplessness, medication etc. of the family members of those suffering from serious psychotic breaks, I thought was fine and pretty thoughtful.
- but (negative again) i don't know if the dialogue was intentionally stilted and simplified to try to say something about the characters but i just didn't think it was good
- use of the phrase "curled like a shrimp" used no less than three times for same character
- ensemble audiobook narration lent itself to egregious accent changes ("loco Coco" having a Queens accent, then a West African accent when another reader took over?)
- just really bad, grating accents in general, especially for the Ecuadorians
- the use of the word "illegals" and "an illegal" to describe one's husband, which felt out of character to the point of taking one out of the story
- honestly, most of the reason I picked up this book was for the Ecuador setting. well, fear not, in this sections every other word is indeed a name drop! we get references to llapingachos, diminutives like gordito, the city of Cuenca, repeating random basic Spanish words like calle and casita and el campo -- but it all feels a little like an effusive post-study abroad blog post. I know I should go easy on this author; could I write something trying to capture Quito or Cuenca any better, without also resorting to a list of foods and romanticized descriptions? maybe not. and maybe it's intentional to show the shallow wanderlust of our character -- but that didn't stop me from coming away from this wanting to know what 10 week English teaching course our author participated in to know to extoll the expat community for X, Y and Z, and then imply Ecuadorians have never heard of sushi. there is /so/ much sushi in Ecuador! also this is a small nitpick but in Latin America one would not refer to someone from the United States as solely 'an American' and say "in America they do things like that;" Ecuadorians, and many people in Latin America, refer to America as the continents, call themselves Americans, and take offense at the monopoly people from the United States extend over the word.
- on a positive note, the discussion of different perspectives, autonomy, helplessness, medication etc. of the family members of those suffering from serious psychotic breaks, I thought was fine and pretty thoughtful.
- but (negative again) i don't know if the dialogue was intentionally stilted and simplified to try to say something about the characters but i just didn't think it was good
lawryn's review against another edition
4.0
A beautiful and generous look into BPD. Incredible intercultural relationships across the board!
hanmur's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.75
lulo49's review against another edition
5.0
I enjoyed this book even though it covered a difficult subject. It was so much more than a book about mental illness. It was a complex, well-developed story involving several characters, one who had the illness, and the others who loved and had to negotiate living with someone who did not understand/believe they really were sick. It reminded me of loving and living with someone with an addiction. In both cases it can be heart-breaking for those who are trying to support and love the person who is struggling. The author did a wonderful job of presenting perspectives of all the characters. It made me more aware of the complexities of these issues and sympathetic for all parties involved.
foreverarose's review against another edition
emotional
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0