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bookspaperink's review against another edition
5.0
Moderate: Blood, Gun violence, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Adult/minor relationship, Alcohol, Child abuse, Toxic relationship, Physical abuse, and Pedophilia
Minor: Vomit, Bullying, Child abuse, Sexual content, Murder, and Death
skullotonin's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Plot
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Graphic: Gun violence, Fire/Fire injury, Emotional abuse, Death, and Child abuse
Moderate: Blood, Bullying, Confinement, Cursing, Grief, Sexual assault, and Sexual harassment
Minor: Abortion
tal_tsarfaty's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Plot
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
5.0
Graphic: Blood, Bullying, Child abuse, Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Fire/Fire injury, Gaslighting, Gun violence, Injury/Injury detail, Physical abuse, Toxic relationship, and Violence
courtneyfalling's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Graphic: Domestic abuse, Child abuse, Blood, Confinement, Emotional abuse, Fire/Fire injury, Gun violence, Injury/Injury detail, Kidnapping, Physical abuse, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, and Violence
Moderate: Abortion, Chronic illness, Bullying, and Misogyny
Minor: Death of parent, Lesbophobia, Medical content, and Sexual harassment
elinmln's review against another edition
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Graphic: Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Fire/Fire injury, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, and Toxic relationship
Moderate: Blood, Body horror, Bullying, Chronic illness, Gaslighting, Gun violence, Kidnapping, Medical content, and Murder
Minor: Abortion and Car accident
anacarol's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
4.75
Moderate: Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Fire/Fire injury, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, and Sexual assault
Minor: Abortion, Bullying, and Rape
gildedwolves's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Graphic: Violence, Child abuse, Toxic relationship, Emotional abuse, Domestic abuse, Physical abuse, and Bullying
Moderate: Sexual assault
outcrye's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.75
That arc set up a satisfyingly badass final scene with
The thing I love most about this book is how Nora, the main character, lived so many lives with the intent to fool but still managed to make real, meaningful relationships in the present. None of those connections are perfect, because Nora sure isn't, but throughout the book, I could see how the past shaped her and how her current relationships developed as she did in order to process it.
In my opinion, The Girls I've Been is primarily a story about trauma, recovering from abuse, and letting go of the toxic habits one would get from having experienced said abuse. To see this victim love and be loved in whole, healthy ways despite all that baggage is interesting as well as heartening.
The only specific criticism I have is about Nora's relationship with Wes, her best friend. All of her other relationships felt very fleshed out and real to me, despite her past and present being so vastly different from mine, and probably most readers'. I would include Wes in this too, but to a lesser degree when compared to the other characters.
All throughout, we are told that Wes and Nora love each other deeply (explicitly platonic, despite Wes also being an ex-boyfriend) and this love is rooted in their shared childhood trauma. I don't doubt the existence of this love. But what I can't understand is why they connected in the first place, what caused that initial draw—how was young, reclusive Nora, fresh out of an abusive situation, able to open up to this stranger, thus beginning their lifelong friendship?
In contrast with her other connections (her sister, her mom, her girlfriend), we don't see how they meet nor do we have key scenes in their relationship that wasn't
In my opinion, the story placed Wes on the same level as the other key figures in her life but held back for whatever reason... perhaps because, again, there were so many things grappling for the reader's attention.
Graphic: Blood, Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Gun violence, Physical abuse, and Violence
Moderate: Bullying, Chronic illness, Drug use, Misogyny, Panic attacks/disorders, and Vomit
Minor: Abortion, Cursing, Gore, Murder, Pedophilia, and Sexual assault