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Graphic: Ableism, Adult/minor relationship, Child abuse, Chronic illness, Death, Domestic abuse, Eating disorder, Mental illness, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Torture, Toxic relationship, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Blood, Vomit, Medical content, Trafficking, Kidnapping, Grief, Suicide attempt, Injury/Injury detail
Graphic: Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Hate crime, Mental illness, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicide, Torture, Violence, Kidnapping, Grief
Graphic: Child abuse, Mental illness, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Torture, Trafficking, Suicide attempt
Graphic: Addiction, Body shaming, Child abuse, Cursing, Drug abuse, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Pedophilia, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Torture, Toxic relationship, Violence, Blood, Kidnapping, Suicide attempt, Sexual harassment, Injury/Injury detail
Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Child abuse, Death, Emotional abuse, Pedophilia, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicide, Torture, Violence, Grief, Abandonment, Sexual harassment
Graphic: Child abuse, Chronic illness, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Torture, Trafficking, Grief, Medical trauma, Car accident, Suicide attempt
Graphic: Addiction, Child abuse, Chronic illness, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug use, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Infidelity, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Racism, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Torture, Toxic relationship, Violence, Grief, Medical trauma, Suicide attempt, Gaslighting, Alcohol, Injury/Injury detail
Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Child abuse, Emotional abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual violence, Suicide, Torture, Forced institutionalization, Grief
This book isn't about friendship. This book isn't about gay people. This book isn't about life experienced. It is a sick imagining of the worst possible growing up and the worst possible dealing with youth trauma. The characters have no growth, no redemption, only misery. Nothing uplifting. Nothing worthy of telling. Another reviewer called it "misery porn." Yep. I agree. Trauma, abuse, sadism porn. That's it. Nothing more.
The sad part is, she is a talented and beautiful writer. Her words contain power in her story telling. It's just not a story worth telling.
Don't read it.
Graphic: Ableism, Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Body horror, Child abuse, Cursing, Drug abuse, Emotional abuse, Hate crime, Homophobia, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Torture, Violence, Trafficking, Kidnapping, Suicide attempt, Injury/Injury detail
Like I said, the plot said it follows 4 friends throughout their lives, but it eventually starts to just follow Jude, the friend with the most trauma EVER. His character is compelling at first and you find yourself wanting to know what happened to him that made him so f*cked in the head. As the book goes on, his character becomes insufferable, even though I sympathize with what happened to him. He constantly refuses help from his friends and his mentor. Believes himself to be unlovable despite the people in his life constantly telling and showing him that they love him and they care. He needed help bad and I found myself practically yelling at the book "GET THERAPY BRO". Jude ended up being the main character and I was sad because his two friends, JB and Malcolm, took a backseat to the story. What a coincidence. The two black characters suddenly don't matter, even though they both went through quite some things as well like addiction.
Willem didn't take so much of a backseat given he was closer to Jude and eventually them ending up together. I loved them coming to the conclusion that they loved each other not just platonically but romantically as well. Also it was hard to watch Jude get to his 30s and 40s still needing that constant validation and love that he would reject. Again found myself mad when Jude was still self-harming at 40. The last two sections of the book ripped me apart and I was BAWLING at the end of the "Happy Years" section, because the audacity to name it that! I did love the book hence my 5 star rating, but would I recommend this book to anyone? Not unless I knew they could emotionally handle it.
Graphic: Addiction, Child abuse, Drug abuse, Pedophilia, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Torture