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Reviews tagging 'Mental illness'
The Courage To Be Disliked: How to free yourself, change your life and achieve real happiness by Ichiro Kishimi, Fumitake Koga
5 reviews
kat_c_h's review
informative
slow-paced
2.0
This is one of few books that I had to put DNF. I could not finish it. It got nearly half way through and gave up. The commentary between both authors was just back and forth frustration and arguments. The book basically says, "pull yourself up by your bootstraps and get over it." It completely ignores trauma, being disabled, and mental health not always allowing someone to "get better". I hoped this book would allow space for the anxiety of not being liked, but it doesn't. DNF.
Minor: Ableism, Mental illness, Suicidal thoughts, and Grief
_kael_'s review
challenging
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
relaxing
fast-paced
4.25
Genres: self-help/personal development, philosophy, psychology, Adlerian psychology (Alfred Adler)
Thoughts: Packed with information cover to cover, which is a lot for an approx. 250-page book for me. A general learning I got from the book is to apply what you've learned in life, even in the smallest, biggest, & most complex problems that you have. Ofc, have nuance on certain things. Some statements are questionable, and I think I can only remember 1-2 that I highly disagree with. One I really had a big emotional reaction to, concluding "attention-seeking" as the only purpose/reason why certain acts are done by people, specifically the youth . Many are new, things you already knew, and things to ponder about. Though some statements contradict themselves, stating trauma doesn't exist but based on their future statements, they imply that it does. Regardless, everything is explained in detail in a way that cliche advice makes more deeper and broader sense, and gives you a deeper understanding, meaning, and realization to that advice. You can read summaries and highlights of this book, but I still suggest you read it entirely to understand those points in depth yourself. It gives a completely different experience. Despite the cons, the pros outweigh it (at about 90%?) that I want to keep the book as a reference book for life advice whenever needed, even if I already took down notes. Would love to discuss about this book though. Loved it from the beginning, still loved it 'til the end. It was also emotional in a way that I remember sad memories. What a roller coaster ride! In order to fully appreciate the book, don't take everything you learn as surefire 100% correct since some claims here don't really mention the source other than who said what. As an amateur, I can still completely claim that some statements aren't accurate like the attention-seeking part. Always filter the advice you get and take the best ones applicable and helpful to you. Maybe even convert unhelpful ones in a way that benefits you.
Writing: I also liked the writing style. I think this is the 3rd self-help book that I've ever read in my entire life, and I prefer this style of writing, Intro > Examples > P's Disclaimers > Y's Q's & Rebuttals > Conclusions, over the paragraph form of mentioning the advice > real life story example > citing specific applicable sources > etc. I can't seem to continue reading such books and I lose interest. I like how this is straight to the point, and the narrative/dialogue format of two people conversing made me engaged in the story and eat up the book daily if I could. The way the chapters start and end remind me of story books. 90 if not 100% of the chapters weren't bland. Though 80-90% of the youth's "replies" for the entire book that don't really add anything to the topics were completely unnecessary. He just repeats the Philosopher's main points in question form, and I think that's what made the book 10% longer. Though there are times that the things P & Y (Philosopher & Youth) were saying are repetitive of their previous points in the chapter, specifically the P. Some conclusions I found unnecessary for I already got the explanation from the chapter intros. Also for someone whose intention is to prove someone wrong, he was quick to change his attitude at the very last chapter.
Happy reading!
Thoughts: Packed with information cover to cover, which is a lot for an approx. 250-page book for me. A general learning I got from the book is to apply what you've learned in life, even in the smallest, biggest, & most complex problems that you have. Ofc, have nuance on certain things. Some statements are questionable, and I think I can only remember 1-2 that I highly disagree with. One I really had a big emotional reaction to, concluding "attention-seeking" as the only purpose/reason why certain acts are done by people, specifically the youth . Many are new, things you already knew, and things to ponder about. Though some statements contradict themselves, stating trauma doesn't exist but based on their future statements, they imply that it does. Regardless, everything is explained in detail in a way that cliche advice makes more deeper and broader sense, and gives you a deeper understanding, meaning, and realization to that advice. You can read summaries and highlights of this book, but I still suggest you read it entirely to understand those points in depth yourself. It gives a completely different experience. Despite the cons, the pros outweigh it (at about 90%?) that I want to keep the book as a reference book for life advice whenever needed, even if I already took down notes. Would love to discuss about this book though. Loved it from the beginning, still loved it 'til the end. It was also emotional in a way that I remember sad memories. What a roller coaster ride! In order to fully appreciate the book, don't take everything you learn as surefire 100% correct since some claims here don't really mention the source other than who said what. As an amateur, I can still completely claim that some statements aren't accurate like the attention-seeking part. Always filter the advice you get and take the best ones applicable and helpful to you. Maybe even convert unhelpful ones in a way that benefits you.
Writing: I also liked the writing style. I think this is the 3rd self-help book that I've ever read in my entire life, and I prefer this style of writing, Intro > Examples > P's Disclaimers > Y's Q's & Rebuttals > Conclusions, over the paragraph form of mentioning the advice > real life story example > citing specific applicable sources > etc. I can't seem to continue reading such books and I lose interest. I like how this is straight to the point, and the narrative/dialogue format of two people conversing made me engaged in the story and eat up the book daily if I could. The way the chapters start and end remind me of story books. 90 if not 100% of the chapters weren't bland. Though 80-90% of the youth's "replies" for the entire book that don't really add anything to the topics were completely unnecessary. He just repeats the Philosopher's main points in question form, and I think that's what made the book 10% longer. Though there are times that the things P & Y (Philosopher & Youth) were saying are repetitive of their previous points in the chapter, specifically the P. Some conclusions I found unnecessary for I already got the explanation from the chapter intros. Also for someone whose intention is to prove someone wrong, he was quick to change his attitude at the very last chapter.
Happy reading!
Graphic: Chronic illness, Death, Mental illness, Self harm, Terminal illness, Toxic relationship, Medical content, and War
Moderate: Sexism
Minor: Infidelity and Injury/Injury detail
Trauma, Concluding "attention-seeking" as the only purpose/reason why certain acts are done by people, specifically the youthbishopbox's review against another edition
challenging
reflective
medium-paced
1.75
This book could be helpful to somebody. But in general, there is a lot of chalking up mental illness to be "just not wanting to do something." This would be a lot less offensive if it weren't for the fact that the book directly tries to tie it to mental illness. If it were making blanket statements and forgetting that there are some people this doesn't apply to, that would be a completely different thing. But this book gives multiple examples of showcasing mentally ill people.
As other reviewers have pointed out, this book does not discuss Japanese philosophy as advertised, but Alderian philosophy instead.
The only reason I have not rated it lower is that the writing style was actually pretty enjoyable. I liked the format of the book being a discussion between two people. The banter was an enjoyable way to present this story. However, I still would not recommend this book unless you are looking specifically for Adlerian philosophy.
As other reviewers have pointed out, this book does not discuss Japanese philosophy as advertised, but Alderian philosophy instead.
The only reason I have not rated it lower is that the writing style was actually pretty enjoyable. I liked the format of the book being a discussion between two people. The banter was an enjoyable way to present this story. However, I still would not recommend this book unless you are looking specifically for Adlerian philosophy.
Moderate: Ableism, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, and Self harm
The ableism present in this book is not described as such but shown by the author's point of view. The author presents multiple ideas that are ableist. It also mentions social anxiety and agoraphobia.shewantsthediction's review against another edition
challenging
informative
reflective
tense
slow-paced
2.0
- The title is very misleading. This book is not about anything Japanese, but Adlerian psychology.
- It's written in the form of a Socratic dialogue between a detached know-it-all old guy and a hotheaded kid, which started out entertaining, but quickly became a tiresome, repetitive device.
- Trauma is absolutely real. As someone who experienced child abuse and has been only recently coming to terms with it a decade later, the suggestion that "trauma doesn't exist" is insensitive, grossly offensive, and a harmful oversimplification. It's also a complete misunderstanding of what victims go through, and it's clear to me the authors of this book have never experienced abuse. I suggest The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk if you're looking for a general understanding, or Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker if you're a survivor yourself. What this book gets wrong about trauma is that you're simultaneously a victim and also not. You were harmed, but healing only comes once you're able to identify as a survivor and change your mental narrative moving forward. This, in turn, is only possible once you're able to confront, explore, and integrate the past—which is next to impossible for survivors who have repressed or forgotten memories, dissociated, or are avoidant. Outright denying that trauma exists, gaslighting survivors, and telling them to just "get over it" or "forget about it because it's in the past" is NOT the answer. The only way out is through. Healing from trauma takes hard work, and it's a process that looks different for everybody.
- People who self-harm are not "doing it for the attention." Honestly I should've DNFed right there. Absolutely disgusting attitude and again, displays a total misunderstanding of mental illness. There were also some off comments about suicide and disabilities.
Moderate: Ableism, Mental illness, Self harm, and Suicide
noahmurdereyes's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
5.0
Minor: Domestic abuse, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Racism, and Grief
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