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xmacabre's review
emotional
informative
reflective
sad
tense
fast-paced
4.0
For the people who are scoring this low, you’re probably not who this book is intended for. This memoir was very validating for not only me but many other people in the Filipino diaspora community. Yes, it was a hard read when it came to the abuse but that is the reality of it. Life doesn’t have a happy ending most of the time and you have to play with the cards you’re dealt with. It’s REAL, it’s RAW. If you wanted a lighthearted book it isn’t this. Nonetheless, it’s an essential read for those who need it. She wrote this and it really resonated with similar thoughts going through my head.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Pedophilia, Sexual assault, Rape, and Cancer
mpatterson610's review against another edition
The descriptions of her assault were too hard for me
fbzcab's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
Content Warnings
Graphic: Cancer, Sexual assault, Child abuse, Pedophilia, and Rape
Moderate: Mental illness
Minor: Deportation
zicariofsilverkeep's review
5.0
A very difficult read emotionally but so insightful
- race
- sa
- mental health
- generational trauma and the ignorance of its existence or the fear of projecting that on to possible future children
- intersectionality
- difference between being black/Asian in America vs the Philippines
- the socioeconomic divide between class in Manila
- cancer
- judgement from society in the Philippines vs America on having children
- children in general
- what it means to be a mother and feel fulfilled in that regard
- weight
- how a body can be used as a shield
- race
- sa
- mental health
- generational trauma and the ignorance of its existence or the fear of projecting that on to possible future children
- intersectionality
- difference between being black/Asian in America vs the Philippines
- the socioeconomic divide between class in Manila
- cancer
- judgement from society in the Philippines vs America on having children
- children in general
- what it means to be a mother and feel fulfilled in that regard
- weight
- how a body can be used as a shield
daniellesalwaysreading's review
I am not adding a rating because I can't speak to the quality of the writing, but this memoir was very painful to read and there was no hope offered. It was mostly "this is my life and it sucked and continues to suck". I wouldn't recommend it to anyone.
kristinana's review
5.0
A very powerful, brave, and moving memoir. Grace Talusan's prose is spare and understated, allowing for the reader to contemplate the enormity of what she writes about. The book begins with a description of making yogurt, a comforting and evocative image that belies the dangers and pain that will become the main focus of the book. I believe that a strong theme of the book has to do with how we make sense of the painful things that happen to us and that we see around us, whether that's by distracting ourselves with other activities, by trying to make sense out of senseless events, or by facing these events head-on and conquering them. All of these coping mechanisms appear in the memoir in different forms, and in this way, among others, the book becomes a description of how we survive. Talusan has a way of showing how one's individual experiences are deeply informed by both our family's history and by the larger histories of nations, and in this way is deeply instructional in terms of the ways our lives are shaped by so many things wholly beyond our control. What is in our control is what we do about it, and her author's note at the beginning is so important; about a realization she has when her niece is born, she writes: "I realized how dangerous it was to protect the wrong people by telling only the happy stories. Lies of omission created the conditions that allowed someone more powerful than me to hurt and exploit me..." By being truthful about so much, I am sure she will help many people comprehend and tell their own stories.