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bookofcinz's review
3.0
Being a Black man in America has been an entirely different experience from being Black everywhere before. Blackness is just different here. Here, it comes with a community and a history but also with an immediate fear and a proportional rage at having to be so afraid all the time. And, make no mistake, white people: I am truly afraid all the time.
Ben Philippe was born in Haiti, left at an early age to live in Canada with his parents and spent majority of his twenties in the US studying in NYC. In his first collection of essays Sure, I’ll Be Your Black Friend he details what life is like being the only Black person in different spaces. In his introduction he notes:
Because of this wrinkle of having been born Haitian, raised Canadian, and having adopted America as my third home in adulthood, conversation both about and around race have always been a fixture in my life.
It is through these conversations and experiences he is able hilariously and soberly tell us about his life. We read about how he lived a plush life in Haiti, having gone to school with expats. He left at an early age for Canada where he had to assimilate to life in this cold, far away country. Of course, looking back he was able to see all the microaggressions and the ways in which he was discriminated against. Fast forward to moving to NYC and attending university, he is thrown into what life is really like for a Black man in America.
I really enjoyed this book more than I thought it would. Ben Philippe’s writing is hilarious, self-depreciating without being cringy and truly vulnerable in moments when it needs to be. That is very hard line to walk and he does it really well. I am always looking to read more about the Haitian experience and I think this may have been the first book I read where someone was a Haitian of means who left the island on “their terms”. I loved his relationship with his mother, how he documents their early move to Canada and what finding a new community.
I think what stood out for me also was how he detailed a breakup with his roommate who happened to be his best friend. It is not every day you get a male perspective how sad and heart breaking it is to break up with your other male friend. There is also the underlining of racism and power dynamics. Well executed!
Yes, there were some moments/experiences he went over a lot and that made the memoir dragged a lot. Overall, I would recommend this one!
Ben Philippe was born in Haiti, left at an early age to live in Canada with his parents and spent majority of his twenties in the US studying in NYC. In his first collection of essays Sure, I’ll Be Your Black Friend he details what life is like being the only Black person in different spaces. In his introduction he notes:
Because of this wrinkle of having been born Haitian, raised Canadian, and having adopted America as my third home in adulthood, conversation both about and around race have always been a fixture in my life.
It is through these conversations and experiences he is able hilariously and soberly tell us about his life. We read about how he lived a plush life in Haiti, having gone to school with expats. He left at an early age for Canada where he had to assimilate to life in this cold, far away country. Of course, looking back he was able to see all the microaggressions and the ways in which he was discriminated against. Fast forward to moving to NYC and attending university, he is thrown into what life is really like for a Black man in America.
I really enjoyed this book more than I thought it would. Ben Philippe’s writing is hilarious, self-depreciating without being cringy and truly vulnerable in moments when it needs to be. That is very hard line to walk and he does it really well. I am always looking to read more about the Haitian experience and I think this may have been the first book I read where someone was a Haitian of means who left the island on “their terms”. I loved his relationship with his mother, how he documents their early move to Canada and what finding a new community.
I think what stood out for me also was how he detailed a breakup with his roommate who happened to be his best friend. It is not every day you get a male perspective how sad and heart breaking it is to break up with your other male friend. There is also the underlining of racism and power dynamics. Well executed!
Yes, there were some moments/experiences he went over a lot and that made the memoir dragged a lot. Overall, I would recommend this one!
bgprincipessa's review
5.0
Something of a cross between a collection of essays and a memoir. I already love both of Philippe's YA novels, so I was predisposed to love this, and it was great. I also love how much of his life you can see in the stories he writes - the places he's lived, the jobs he's had, the relationships that have exploded.
I especially love when someone from my cohort writes a book with specific pop culture references that speak to my soul. Philippe got his start writing Xander/Angel/Buffy fanfic - I died listening to that. He references Gossip Girl approximately 1 million times, and The Social Network at least 5, including an "Eduardo Saverin style breakdown" during the breakup of him and his roommate "Mark." (And how often do you see male writers talking about the emotional upheaval of friendship?!)
Two of my favorite turns of phrase: "a Daisy Buchanan level of carelessness" and "the tragic Marissa Cooper, played by the even more tragic Mischa Barton." *chef's kiss*
There is an entire section in which he describes how he lost a significant amount of weight, and the reactions he got when he returned to school, that really rubbed me the wrong way.... and then he explicitly acknowledged how that section would sound to readers, and how the 2000's were a different time, and turns it on its head in such a fascinating way. It reminded me of Bo Burnham's Inside and how he both acknowledges the problematic work he has done and apologizes for it, while also realizing it's still there anyway. Then Philippe rewrote that section using 2020 terminology and it really shows you how the culture hasn't changed, we just use different words to make it sound better.
There is also so much anger in his writing about #BlackLivesMatter, which I can't do justice. Overall it just gave me so much to think about, and I really enjoyed the ride. I was already shouting his praises all over the place, but now I will even more.
I especially love when someone from my cohort writes a book with specific pop culture references that speak to my soul. Philippe got his start writing Xander/Angel/Buffy fanfic - I died listening to that. He references Gossip Girl approximately 1 million times, and The Social Network at least 5, including an "Eduardo Saverin style breakdown" during the breakup of him and his roommate "Mark." (And how often do you see male writers talking about the emotional upheaval of friendship?!)
Two of my favorite turns of phrase: "a Daisy Buchanan level of carelessness" and "the tragic Marissa Cooper, played by the even more tragic Mischa Barton." *chef's kiss*
There is an entire section in which he describes how he lost a significant amount of weight, and the reactions he got when he returned to school, that really rubbed me the wrong way.... and then he explicitly acknowledged how that section would sound to readers, and how the 2000's were a different time, and turns it on its head in such a fascinating way. It reminded me of Bo Burnham's Inside and how he both acknowledges the problematic work he has done and apologizes for it, while also realizing it's still there anyway. Then Philippe rewrote that section using 2020 terminology and it really shows you how the culture hasn't changed, we just use different words to make it sound better.
There is also so much anger in his writing about #BlackLivesMatter, which I can't do justice. Overall it just gave me so much to think about, and I really enjoyed the ride. I was already shouting his praises all over the place, but now I will even more.
lookingforamandaa's review
No rating as I don't usually rate non-fiction. I enjoyed this. I listened to the audiobook. I liked that there was humor to balance the tougher stories. I definitely recommend this one. I also really enjoyed getting to see bits and pieces about Philippe's life that he used to write his YA novels.
_basicbookworm's review
5.0
Have you ever read a book and immediately wanted to be friends with the author? That’s how this book made me feel.
This memoir in essays follows Ben Phillipe’s experiences of being Black in predominately white spaces. It touches on many important issues while being laugh out loud funny. This book can be uncomfortable and speaks the truth but the humor makes it easy to read. This is a great book for anyone looking to start or continue their anti-racist reading journey. Truly this is a must read.
Fans of Born a Crime by Trevor Noah will love this one!
Thank you to Harper Perennial for the complementary copy of this book! #oliveinfluencer
This memoir in essays follows Ben Phillipe’s experiences of being Black in predominately white spaces. It touches on many important issues while being laugh out loud funny. This book can be uncomfortable and speaks the truth but the humor makes it easy to read. This is a great book for anyone looking to start or continue their anti-racist reading journey. Truly this is a must read.
Fans of Born a Crime by Trevor Noah will love this one!
Thank you to Harper Perennial for the complementary copy of this book! #oliveinfluencer
jazszszs's review
5.0
this book,,, i can’t even put into words what an experience it was. it was uncomfortably relatable and only made me think more about my own ‘blackness’. reading about someone who has lived three different types of black was so incredibly interesting - the way a country can change the way you’re perceived/the way you act as a black person. i’ve learned so much both from his experience and through connections i’ve made with my own and that’s something i think is wild. i’m definitely going to reread this when exam season pops up and i want to pressure myself into success,,,
heathermb's review
5.0
Source: Libby audio
SO WORTH THE READ.
Are you white? read this or listen to this. (the performance was awesome)
So important for the white people to do their work.
This can be a resource in doing our work.
SO WORTH THE READ.
Are you white? read this or listen to this. (the performance was awesome)
So important for the white people to do their work.
This can be a resource in doing our work.
wchereads's review against another edition
funny
lighthearted
reflective
It feels a bit unclear what this book tries to be exactly, but I enjoyed it nevertheless. Perhaps it isn't trying to be anything: it is the author being himself, sharing his life stories in a mostly lighthearted manner with profound commentaries on topics such as casual racism, racial stereotypes and the privildge of being 'apolitical' woven through out. A very good read.
village_of_fowl_devotees's review
funny
reflective
medium-paced
3.75
I should've expected it from the title, but many parts of this book are written for white people.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Racial slurs and Racism
Minor: Domestic abuse