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alonadadonut's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Not 5 stars because the book ends on a sort of cliffhanger and I would prefer to know what ends up happening. On the one hand I understand why we don't get told what happens and on the other hand I desperately require closure.
Moderate: Abandonment, Alcoholism, Death of parent, Infidelity, Sexual content, and Toxic relationship
Minor: Domestic abuse, Homophobia, Medical content, and Racial slurs
kaii's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Graphic: Alcohol, Death of parent, Cancer, Homophobia, and Terminal illness
Moderate: Abandonment, Domestic abuse, Sexual content, Addiction, Alcoholism, Homophobia, and Medical content
Minor: Infidelity, Racial slurs, Fatphobia, Grief, and Body shaming
thewordsdevourer's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
3.5
the characters are deeply - some surprisingly - flawed and layered; there's no 'good' ppl here bc everyone's fcked up in one way or another. im a lil amazed at how washington handles the characterization and adeptly shows how everyone's been on both sides of being hurt and doing the hurting.
in addition to being quite funny - mike's and ben's parents are bemusingly acerbic and surprising - this book's also got a lot of heart, esp in regards to its theme of family, w/ mike and eiju's complex relationship being a particularly heartrending one. a sense of melancholy and bittersweetness permeates throughout the aforementioned second section, evoking the slice-of-life quality often found in jpn lit. i view this as a great accomplishment as it's sth so rarely achieved in western lit, let alone by a man from texas. the importance and prevalent presence of food in the story is also sth i rly like, calming while acting as a bridge between the characters, while also displaying washington's deep knowledge of jpn culinary culture.
i enjoy this book for its acerbic humor, messy characters, melancholic tone, and the exploration of its themes, particularly that in this life, everyone - even ur seemingly perfect parents - is just winging it.
Graphic: Cancer, Homophobia, Terminal illness, Infidelity, and Sexual content
Moderate: Racism, Chronic illness, Death of parent, and Domestic abuse
Minor: Abandonment, Alcoholism, and Body shaming
sorcha's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
Graphic: Death of parent, Death, Sexual content, Toxic relationship, and Terminal illness
Moderate: Abandonment, Addiction, Alcoholism, Cancer, Grief, Homophobia, and Infidelity
Minor: Vomit, Physical abuse, Drug use, and Cursing
agnesg's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
3.5
Graphic: Death of parent, Death, and Sexual content
Moderate: Alcohol, Abandonment, Alcoholism, Fatphobia, and Infidelity
Minor: Homophobia
faythd's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
Moderate: Infidelity and Terminal illness
Minor: Domestic abuse
ollie_again's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.75
That loving a person means letting them change when they need to. And letting them go when they need to. And that doesn't make them any less of a home. Just maybe not one for you. Or only for a season or two. But that doesn't diminish the love. It just changes forms.
It baffles me that people shelve this book as a romance. Because it is not. The book starts with a relationship that is falling apart and as the title suggest the book is a memorial of that relationship and other relationships in the lives of the two central men. How it started, how it progressed, a memorial to small moments, nice or not, in those relationships. The book is not even about putting the relationship back together and the two men, Mike and Ben, are apart for most of the book. And it is as much about romantic, sexual relationships as about family relationships. And unlike in true romance, there is no guarantee how the book (and the central relationship) will end.
I was fortunate enough I was aware that this book is not a romance and I had my expectations set pretty clearly and accurately. And in the end, I quite enjoyed this book. It is not action-packed, with no particular twists or turns, and even though it is emotional it is not exactly an emotional rollercoaster either. It is very much a character study of sorts and I liked that. Surprising but a nice addition were the photographs sprinkled throughout the book.
Even though it wasn't a groundbreaking read for me, it definitely put Bryan Washington on my radar and I'll pick up whatever he comes up with next. (Quotation marks would be appreciated though.)
Graphic: Infidelity, Homophobia, and Racism
Moderate: Domestic abuse, Death of parent, and Cancer
Minor: Racial slurs
greatu's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.5
Graphic: Homophobia, Infidelity, Medical content, Mental illness, Racial slurs, Terminal illness, Toxic relationship, Vomit, Addiction, Alcohol, Abandonment, Alcoholism, Body shaming, Grief, Racism, Sexual content, Cancer, Classism, Cursing, Death, Death of parent, and Emotional abuse
gabbygarcia's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.25
Graphic: Abandonment, Death, and Death of parent
Moderate: Addiction, Alcoholism, Cancer, Cursing, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Grief, Infidelity, Sexual content, Terminal illness, Toxic relationship, and Vomit
Minor: Alcohol, Blood, Drug use, Fatphobia, Homophobia, Injury/Injury detail, Medical content, Racial slurs, and Racism
menomica's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
I feel like the book wanted to do things, but never really delivered. The book itself suffers from not having a proper ending, like much of the storylines in it. I think the most obvious example is with Tam. He’s introduced, as if he’s going to a huge player and very influential, but then he fucks off for 20 pages, and only comes back for three lines before Mike ditches him.
Other things/themes I felt like this book pointed at but never actually took the time to elaborate on:
- Racism: Besides the “racist jokes” and that instance with the racist waiter, the biggest moment of this for me was with the Workers at the play center and how they interacted with Ahmad/Benson was giving very much let’s antagonize the black kid cause it’s easiest to do. Also, even though it was a joke, them referring to Ahmad as Ben’s because they’re the only black people in the center felt… racially motivated. But it was never really elaborated beyond that. The theme of race itself was prominent throughout the book, and I think that was done well because it was obviously from an observational lense, and not with the intent of making commentary, but sometimes it felt like they’d touch on racism and then drop it like a hot potato
- Tam. Wtf. What was the reason for him being there. For Mike to have a potential love interest?? Nothing developed between them, and yet he was introduced as someone who was going to be super big and important for Mike.
THEY DIDN’T EVEN HAVE SEXThey exchange very minimal conversion and it just felt like there was supposed to be development there but it just never happened. And then Mike just left (like his dad did with him)!
Graphic: Cancer, Death of parent, and Terminal illness
Moderate: Alcoholism, Racism, Physical abuse, Medical content, and Infidelity
Minor: Bullying, Fatphobia, Infidelity, and Racial slurs