Scan barcode
markrickaby's review against another edition
5.0
As dark, harrowing and disturbing as this book is, there's so much love and beauty in it. It's relentless, devastating, and I feel like I've aged just for having read it, but it's also one of the most wonderful and compassionate books I've ever read.
wtfbrii's review against another edition
5.0
This book altered my perception of reality; was is good and evil and who deserves to be happy, Jude St Francis and Willem
jkameisha's review against another edition
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
leakleino's review against another edition
1.0
I just can’t get myself to finish this fucking book. The protagonist is so fucking unlikable and I can’t get myself to sympathise with him, let alone be invested in his story. It’s a DNF for me. The writing is bad as well
aabalaaba's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
funny
inspiring
mysterious
sad
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
eikaia's review against another edition
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual violence, Sexual harassment, Pedophilia, Blood, Suicide attempt, and Self harm
Moderate: Addiction
Minor: Abandonment
alexandra_ninelives's review against another edition
3.0
So I did not like this as much as the first time. I think the shock of all this at first made my judgement cloudy but it’s nothing special. I wouldn’t recommend reading it. The torture porn parts are not worth reading this story. It’s a shame cause I love reading about long friendships and found families.
haytaylor34's review against another edition
I’ll write a review later when I can form a full sentence. The writing was beautiful just extremely devastating and I am extremely not ok. Believe me I have a lot to say. How can I even rate this??
Update: 27/4/2023
Ok, where do I start, just letting you know this will not be an english essay. It will be a rant with most likely terrible punctuation and sentences that will make no sense. Probably wont even be a review either, just a random discussion with myself. And also spoilers sorry I just can't avoid them. Also, I will talk about some trigger warnings for talk about self harm, suicide, eating disorders and probably more because this book is full of them. This was definitely not a light read physically or mentally and had to put the book down many times because I really could not take it. Which is definitely one of the reasons why I have very complicated feelings towards the story, as sometimes it felt as though triggers were just put in there to pull out your heart and stomp on it until it was mush. Also maybe not all of them had a purpose and needed to be added. Anyway, don't get me wrong I adored reading this book and although sometimes my annotations of "I hate this book" in bold letters may say otherwise. I don't think I regret reading this book. Although I did in those last 100 pages.
I have a complicated love/hate relationship with this story. I love the writing, the way she wrote the characters to be so complicated and even though it was a 700+ page book in no way did it drag or feel too long, I could have kept reading about all of them and their friendships. I felt so connected to the story. I lovveee Willem, Jude, Andy and Harold!! You can tell it's good writing when the characters feel so real to you. The way that it was written and Jude's past being revealed to use slowly was well done, and slowly throughout the book Jude becomes so clear to you and you understand why he may do some of the things he does.
It kind of reminds me of 'this is me trying' by taylor swift I can imagine Jude feeling the way the song reflects. "I've been having a hard time adjusting" reflects the way the trauma in his past is affecting him throughout his whole life, even when his life is finally going in a direction that is much better than his past, he was struggling. For him cutting himself was a way for him to "try" I can picture him saying "this is me trying." and "at least I'm trying" Not saying that cutting himself and harming himself was the right move and he should have reached out for more help but for him it was a way for him to hold on and try. "They told me all of my cages were mental, So I got wasted like all my potential" He never felt that he was worthy of anyone's love and in a way felt as there was a physical cage around him because of what he had done he no longer felt as though he had potential. "And my words shoot to kill when I'm mad. I have a lot of regrets about that" The way he treats Harold and others especially at the end.. I was not ok with how he was treating Harold and Julia, that had done so much for him and yet I understand which kind of sums up my love/hate relationship , it's just so hard to reflect on it. Ok one more Taylor Swift lyric then I'm done.
"And it's hard to be at a party when I feel like an open wound
It's hard to be anywhere these days when all I want is you
You're a flashback in a film reel on the one screen in my town"
Hmmm that's too much. Wkfweifhwegfkwe no. stop. the end. all he wants his him. film reel. like his movies. He feels like an open wound as well. He just feels like all the things he has done, and he doesn't deserve to be happy. Also how he avoids his friends and people who care for him, even thought they are here to help.
Sorry about the jumping around topics a lot. Kind of reflects my thoughts and brain at the moment. The way there are three meanings of a little life. One being how Jude sees his life as meaningless and little, second being while reading this book it kind of makes our owns lives feel little and irrelevant and thirdly. i am literally so angry that she added this but how it said that Brother Luke told him to "show a little life" when having sex with him. He was raping him. I felt and feel physically sick. Sorry for going so dark but that's how this book feels. Sometimes you are ok and reading about some complicated friendship and the next you are hit in the gut by some trigger warning and it sucks, literally sucks.
Jude deserves the world, my most frequent annotations were firstly "I hate this book" after everything bad happens that leaves me so angry and secondly "poor thing" or "you deserve the world" or "this is too much" because it is. He had to go through so much and it is unimaginable, terrible and so confronting it left me so grateful for my life though.
Ok now I want to talk about the end. That was rude. So so so so. so. so so rude. My stages of grief were denial, staring at the wall for actually probably half an hour, don't think I'm exaggerating and then angry sobbing. for the whole day on Tuesday I was grieving. because that should never have happened. And then I really could not bring myself to read anymore, it was a struggle, I didn't want to see Jude's reaction. Nope. And it was as bad as I thought. I just feel so bad and terrible and it makes it so much worse that these characters feel so real. I hated that last chapter though. It made me so confused, the only thing I liked that it was in Harold's perspective but other than that nope, not how it should have ended. Not Andy, not Jude, not Richard like what I was sitting there getting punched in the gut every second. whyyyy. whyyy was this writtennn and whyy was I so dumbbb to readdd it. And yet again I don't regret anything ahahaha the mood swings. I can't possibly rate this my feelings are to mixed and it is just so unlike anything I have read before so in no way can I compare it. ANwAY writing this was good to get my feelings out even though I'm not expecting anyone to read this.
Update: 27/4/2023
Ok, where do I start, just letting you know this will not be an english essay. It will be a rant with most likely terrible punctuation and sentences that will make no sense. Probably wont even be a review either, just a random discussion with myself. And also spoilers sorry I just can't avoid them. Also, I will talk about some trigger warnings for talk about self harm, suicide, eating disorders and probably more because this book is full of them. This was definitely not a light read physically or mentally and had to put the book down many times because I really could not take it. Which is definitely one of the reasons why I have very complicated feelings towards the story, as sometimes it felt as though triggers were just put in there to pull out your heart and stomp on it until it was mush. Also maybe not all of them had a purpose and needed to be added. Anyway, don't get me wrong I adored reading this book and although sometimes my annotations of "I hate this book" in bold letters may say otherwise. I don't think I regret reading this book. Although I did in those last 100 pages.
I have a complicated love/hate relationship with this story. I love the writing, the way she wrote the characters to be so complicated and even though it was a 700+ page book in no way did it drag or feel too long, I could have kept reading about all of them and their friendships. I felt so connected to the story. I lovveee Willem, Jude, Andy and Harold!! You can tell it's good writing when the characters feel so real to you. The way that it was written and Jude's past being revealed to use slowly was well done, and slowly throughout the book Jude becomes so clear to you and you understand why he may do some of the things he does.
It kind of reminds me of 'this is me trying' by taylor swift I can imagine Jude feeling the way the song reflects. "I've been having a hard time adjusting" reflects the way the trauma in his past is affecting him throughout his whole life, even when his life is finally going in a direction that is much better than his past, he was struggling. For him cutting himself was a way for him to "try" I can picture him saying "this is me trying." and "at least I'm trying" Not saying that cutting himself and harming himself was the right move and he should have reached out for more help but for him it was a way for him to hold on and try. "They told me all of my cages were mental, So I got wasted like all my potential" He never felt that he was worthy of anyone's love and in a way felt as there was a physical cage around him because of what he had done he no longer felt as though he had potential. "And my words shoot to kill when I'm mad. I have a lot of regrets about that" The way he treats Harold and others especially at the end.. I was not ok with how he was treating Harold and Julia, that had done so much for him and yet I understand which kind of sums up my love/hate relationship , it's just so hard to reflect on it. Ok one more Taylor Swift lyric then I'm done.
"And it's hard to be at a party when I feel like an open wound
It's hard to be anywhere these days when all I want is you
You're a flashback in a film reel on the one screen in my town"
Hmmm that's too much. Wkfweifhwegfkwe no. stop. the end. all he wants his him. film reel. like his movies. He feels like an open wound as well. He just feels like all the things he has done, and he doesn't deserve to be happy. Also how he avoids his friends and people who care for him, even thought they are here to help.
Sorry about the jumping around topics a lot. Kind of reflects my thoughts and brain at the moment. The way there are three meanings of a little life. One being how Jude sees his life as meaningless and little, second being while reading this book it kind of makes our owns lives feel little and irrelevant and thirdly. i am literally so angry that she added this but how it said that Brother Luke told him to "show a little life" when having sex with him. He was raping him. I felt and feel physically sick. Sorry for going so dark but that's how this book feels. Sometimes you are ok and reading about some complicated friendship and the next you are hit in the gut by some trigger warning and it sucks, literally sucks.
Jude deserves the world, my most frequent annotations were firstly "I hate this book" after everything bad happens that leaves me so angry and secondly "poor thing" or "you deserve the world" or "this is too much" because it is. He had to go through so much and it is unimaginable, terrible and so confronting it left me so grateful for my life though.
Ok now I want to talk about the end. That was rude. So so so so. so. so so rude. My stages of grief were denial, staring at the wall for actually probably half an hour, don't think I'm exaggerating and then angry sobbing. for the whole day on Tuesday I was grieving. because that should never have happened. And then I really could not bring myself to read anymore, it was a struggle, I didn't want to see Jude's reaction. Nope. And it was as bad as I thought. I just feel so bad and terrible and it makes it so much worse that these characters feel so real. I hated that last chapter though. It made me so confused, the only thing I liked that it was in Harold's perspective but other than that nope, not how it should have ended. Not Andy, not Jude, not Richard like what I was sitting there getting punched in the gut every second. whyyyy. whyyy was this writtennn and whyy was I so dumbbb to readdd it. And yet again I don't regret anything ahahaha the mood swings. I can't possibly rate this my feelings are to mixed and it is just so unlike anything I have read before so in no way can I compare it. ANwAY writing this was good to get my feelings out even though I'm not expecting anyone to read this.