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7 reviews for:
Different Loving: A Complete Exploration of the World of Sexual Dominance and Submission
Gloria Brame, Jon Jacobs, William Brame
3.61 AVERAGE
7 reviews for:
Different Loving: A Complete Exploration of the World of Sexual Dominance and Submission
Gloria Brame, Jon Jacobs, William Brame
3.61 AVERAGE
informative
medium-paced
This book was such an interesting look into the world of BDSM/SM/D&s, especially when you take the fact that it was written in the early 90s and published in 1996 into account.
I feel that, even today, this is an aspect of human sexuality that hasn't been studied and remains misunderstood, but "Different Loving" and Dr. Gloria Brame's look into the history of erotic interests, the vast interests of the community (at the time, though it's certainly grown since - something that is touched upon in "Different Loving Too"), and interviews from a range of individuals within this community provides such a good insight and clarifies what's still misunderstood to this day.
The way that the book was broken up, with 26 chapters across 7 sections about different subgroups of interests and kinks, worked well. I especially liked the quotes spread throughout the chapters followed by interviews at the end of each chapter, I think that getting to hear what the interviewees had to say throughout the chapter made the research aspect of it better - it was backing up what Dr. Brame was saying.
Overall, I thought this was such an interesting book, and even if it's outdated now (given that it was researched and published in the 90s and I read it in 2025), it still provided so much insight into the world of BDSM.
I feel that, even today, this is an aspect of human sexuality that hasn't been studied and remains misunderstood, but "Different Loving" and Dr. Gloria Brame's look into the history of erotic interests, the vast interests of the community (at the time, though it's certainly grown since - something that is touched upon in "Different Loving Too"), and interviews from a range of individuals within this community provides such a good insight and clarifies what's still misunderstood to this day.
The way that the book was broken up, with 26 chapters across 7 sections about different subgroups of interests and kinks, worked well. I especially liked the quotes spread throughout the chapters followed by interviews at the end of each chapter, I think that getting to hear what the interviewees had to say throughout the chapter made the research aspect of it better - it was backing up what Dr. Brame was saying.
Overall, I thought this was such an interesting book, and even if it's outdated now (given that it was researched and published in the 90s and I read it in 2025), it still provided so much insight into the world of BDSM.
A really fascinating look in to the world of BDSM. As others have said, it is not a "how to" book - it is a "what/when/where/WHY" type of book. I found it intriguing, and enjoyed the individual interviews. Really a little bit of everyone included in here, from the mom next door to your big city S&M club hoppers. Well sourced, in my opinion.
It did take me a little while to get through it (just over a month, that's slow for me.) This wasn't because I found the book boring by any means, I just had a lot going on and wasn't making enough time to read!
It did take me a little while to get through it (just over a month, that's slow for me.) This wasn't because I found the book boring by any means, I just had a lot going on and wasn't making enough time to read!
I'm not even sure how I can make a review for this book. I absolutely love it.
As someone who is very into sex education and BDSM education and psychology, as well as someone who has worked at a Sex Store/Shop, this book only increased my interest and my adoration for the community.
It was heavily educational, despite it being such an old book, based from surveys and interviews done in 1991-1992.
If you like the history of kink and BDSM communities, and you like to understand how the culture has shifted from what it used to be to how we interact with it and see it now, then this book might feed your curiosity of hearing from the members of the community themselves!
As someone who heavily enjoys the psychology of bdsm and kink, I heavily enjoyed how in depth this book went into history as well as showing how different people interact with their kinks, and recognize why they might have those kinks, as well as explaining WHY the kink or fetish is enjoyable and interesting!
I heavily adore this book and I don't think I plan on ever giving it up, and I have even gone as far as looking up and finding their SECOND book, Different Loving Too!
[b:Different Loving Too: Real People, Real Lives, Real BDSM|28281519|Different Loving Too Real People, Real Lives, Real BDSM|Gloria G. Brame|https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1450914973l/28281519._SY75_.jpg|48329550]
This book was worked on and published in 2015, and it is unfortunately a much SMALLER book, but it is full of more interviews and info... I am currently in the process of reading it!
As someone who is very into sex education and BDSM education and psychology, as well as someone who has worked at a Sex Store/Shop, this book only increased my interest and my adoration for the community.
It was heavily educational, despite it being such an old book, based from surveys and interviews done in 1991-1992.
If you like the history of kink and BDSM communities, and you like to understand how the culture has shifted from what it used to be to how we interact with it and see it now, then this book might feed your curiosity of hearing from the members of the community themselves!
As someone who heavily enjoys the psychology of bdsm and kink, I heavily enjoyed how in depth this book went into history as well as showing how different people interact with their kinks, and recognize why they might have those kinks, as well as explaining WHY the kink or fetish is enjoyable and interesting!
I heavily adore this book and I don't think I plan on ever giving it up, and I have even gone as far as looking up and finding their SECOND book, Different Loving Too!
[b:Different Loving Too: Real People, Real Lives, Real BDSM|28281519|Different Loving Too Real People, Real Lives, Real BDSM|Gloria G. Brame|https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1450914973l/28281519._SY75_.jpg|48329550]
This book was worked on and published in 2015, and it is unfortunately a much SMALLER book, but it is full of more interviews and info... I am currently in the process of reading it!
informative
slow-paced
Note that this is published in the 90s, so some of the terms for the queer community are out of date, but they do a good job of discussing queerness within the book.
A very interesting read. What made the book more relatable in a sense, to someone not familiar on this topic, were the interviews with people at the end of each chapter. It allowed for a more personal reading experience.