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3.57 AVERAGE
3.57 AVERAGE
- the vibes of the book changed quite often and the transitions felt jarring
- initially found it amusing/relatable bc i too currently dislike my high paying finance-adjacent job
- the enemies ish/coworkers to lovers was cute
- i actually did not know what this would be about so i assumed from the first 1/3 that it was a chill romcom
- the politics theme was interesting (aka how would u feel dating a republican...) but really only covered in the final chapters? and i feel it didn't really get resolved?
- initially found it amusing/relatable bc i too currently dislike my high paying finance-adjacent job
- the enemies ish/coworkers to lovers was cute
- i actually did not know what this would be about so i assumed from the first 1/3 that it was a chill romcom
- the politics theme was interesting (aka how would u feel dating a republican...) but really only covered in the final chapters? and i feel it didn't really get resolved?
I’ll say this. This is one of the most impactful novels I have read in a long time. I might call it gut-wrenching, even disturbing, because so much of it deals with minutiae of disagreements and incompatibility in love. I can’t think of anyone who hasn’t gone through some of this; who woke up once next to their spouse and was like “who is this?” But then having an added layer of racial guilt, politics and identity thrown in the mix: wow.
I can’t remember where I saw this, but once I came across this: “I wish they would just beat me up, call me names but instead I have to spend all my energy guessing whether everything that happens to me is because I am black”. On some level, outright blatant racism is sometimes less exhausting than the subtle kind…where you’re constantly wondering if you were fired because of who you are or you’re just incompetent whether the reality you grew up knowing was real or you’re really “overreacting”
Let’s start with Josh. Josh is in many ways actually a sweet guy and sometimes a pretty decent boyfriend. He stops eating strawberries for Jess. He takes care of her when she’s down and assures her when she’s feeling she’s worthless. On the other hand, he clearly doesn’t know how to deal with her. He outrightly hides things from her that he believes she won’t understand. He man-splains to her multiple times but ultimately the biggest problem is he just doesn’t get it. He can easily treat everything like an abstraction and stay calm in every fight they have because he’s got no skin in the game. No matter what happens: Trump or not, he’s going to be fine. So everything really is fine for him.
Jess is complicated. She didn’t grow up around many black people, being largely isolated from her family and growing up without a mother. She often feels worthless and feels ugly and because of this she’s attracted to the kind of wealth and power that might make her like she’s a somebody. She wants to do the right thing but has little moral guidance or support. Her liberal friends, in my opinion, are just as clueless as Josh if not more. The irony here is that Josh was right about one thing: economic class is the ultimate common denominator (though that doesn’t mean it doesn’t intertwine with race). Still we root for Jess because we know she’s ultimately a good person who wants to be loved but until she genuinely believes in her self worth, she’s going to have a hard time being loved in the way she needs.
I liked a line in the book that said “I do think it’s healthy for a soul to have some relationships where there’s no need to explain everything”. In my opinion this is the ultimate reason why relationships between certain type of people won’t work: it’s just too exhausting to do it all the time. Love needs to be mixed with compatibility. HOWEVER the book also shows how complicated and honestly downright dangerous echo chambers can be, especially when divided into the ridiculous boxes of liberal and conservative and of identity politics. (I believe neoliberalism takes advantage of identity politics to split up the left). The hard work that Jess and Josh were doing needs to be done: just on a democratic level. Is everything fine? Not until real discussions are had, not the abstract and intellectual ones that Josh favoured , accusing anyone with emotion of being “irrational”, but discussions full of empathy and compassion. Thats how you really fight Trump.
I can’t remember where I saw this, but once I came across this: “I wish they would just beat me up, call me names but instead I have to spend all my energy guessing whether everything that happens to me is because I am black”. On some level, outright blatant racism is sometimes less exhausting than the subtle kind…where you’re constantly wondering if you were fired because of who you are or you’re just incompetent whether the reality you grew up knowing was real or you’re really “overreacting”
Let’s start with Josh. Josh is in many ways actually a sweet guy and sometimes a pretty decent boyfriend. He stops eating strawberries for Jess. He takes care of her when she’s down and assures her when she’s feeling she’s worthless. On the other hand, he clearly doesn’t know how to deal with her. He outrightly hides things from her that he believes she won’t understand. He man-splains to her multiple times but ultimately the biggest problem is he just doesn’t get it. He can easily treat everything like an abstraction and stay calm in every fight they have because he’s got no skin in the game. No matter what happens: Trump or not, he’s going to be fine. So everything really is fine for him.
Jess is complicated. She didn’t grow up around many black people, being largely isolated from her family and growing up without a mother. She often feels worthless and feels ugly and because of this she’s attracted to the kind of wealth and power that might make her like she’s a somebody. She wants to do the right thing but has little moral guidance or support. Her liberal friends, in my opinion, are just as clueless as Josh if not more. The irony here is that Josh was right about one thing: economic class is the ultimate common denominator (though that doesn’t mean it doesn’t intertwine with race). Still we root for Jess because we know she’s ultimately a good person who wants to be loved but until she genuinely believes in her self worth, she’s going to have a hard time being loved in the way she needs.
I liked a line in the book that said “I do think it’s healthy for a soul to have some relationships where there’s no need to explain everything”. In my opinion this is the ultimate reason why relationships between certain type of people won’t work: it’s just too exhausting to do it all the time. Love needs to be mixed with compatibility. HOWEVER the book also shows how complicated and honestly downright dangerous echo chambers can be, especially when divided into the ridiculous boxes of liberal and conservative and of identity politics. (I believe neoliberalism takes advantage of identity politics to split up the left). The hard work that Jess and Josh were doing needs to be done: just on a democratic level. Is everything fine? Not until real discussions are had, not the abstract and intellectual ones that Josh favoured , accusing anyone with emotion of being “irrational”, but discussions full of empathy and compassion. Thats how you really fight Trump.
This isn’t a romance story. It’s racism. Horrible book. I don’t know who would find this enjoyable. Do not read it in my opinion.
I was given this arc from Simon & Schuster in exchange for an honest review.
I was given this arc from Simon & Schuster in exchange for an honest review.
This novel attempts to answer the question: What would you do if you fell in love with a Trump supporter? Eeeek! It's smart, nuanced, and well-written, but it also wasn't the romance I expected. It's another one of those books that I loved the first half, then found the second half harder to read as the main character's life started to fall apart. However, I think the ideas explored here are really important and appreciate the way the author tackled some complex issues.
fast-paced
This was recommended as a fun summer read and it was quite literally everything but fun and summery.
Weird plot. Hated this especially during these racially charged times.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Racism, Toxic relationship
challenging
hopeful
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
lighthearted
reflective
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
Yes
Loveable characters:
Yes
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes
medium-paced
Plot or Character Driven:
Character
Strong character development:
No
Loveable characters:
No
Diverse cast of characters:
Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus:
Yes