Reviews tagging 'Toxic relationship'

Milkman by Anna Burns

10 reviews

rory_john14's review

dark funny hopeful mysterious reflective sad slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.25

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Ableism, Animal cruelty, Animal death, Bullying, Child abuse, Child death, Cursing, Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Gun violence, Hate crime, Homophobia, Infidelity, Mental illness, Misogyny, Sexism, Sexual content, Suicidal thoughts, Toxic relationship, Violence, Police brutality, Religious bigotry, Stalking, Death of parent, Murder, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Gaslighting, Toxic friendship, Sexual harassment, and Injury/Injury detail

Moderate: Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicide, Xenophobia, Blood, Dementia, Grief, Abortion, Pregnancy, Abandonment, and Alcohol

Minor: Body shaming, Incest, Panic attacks/disorders, Racism, Terminal illness, Medical content, Kidnapping, and Mass/school shootings

notthatcosta's review

challenging dark funny mysterious reflective tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? No

2.75

I find this one tough to review because there were aspects that I absolutely loved (the world building and the social commentary around the Troubles). However, I found the writing style almost unbearable at points (the stream of consciousness prose, the long-winded way of addressing characters, the timeline jumps).

The bottom line is that I didn't really like a single character in the book, and even the protagonist made some infuriating decisions at points and overall my feeling was 'this place is not for you, you are above these people and you need to get the hell out of there' - which although a simplification, seemed preferable to sticking around in such a place. Also, her mum was a total arsehole and I don't know if I was supposed to like her, but I certainly didn't. 

Overall, I'm glad I read it, and I feel like most of the aspects I took issue with were at least strong intentional stylistic choices made by the author, and I can always respect a big swing.

Oh and ALSO, the random 11th hour gay subplot was egregious. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Animal death, Bullying, Child death, Death, Emotional abuse, Gun violence, Infidelity, Misogyny, Rape, Sexism, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicide, Terminal illness, Toxic relationship, Violence, Blood, Grief, Stalking, Death of parent, Murder, Gaslighting, Toxic friendship, Abandonment, Sexual harassment, War, and Injury/Injury detail

just_jess02's review against another edition

dark emotional sad tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? No
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

1.5

This book feels like a repetitive, overly wordy stream of consciousness. It’s like being in a conversation that you can’t get out of and can’t get a word in. The text is quick moving and dense but the plot is soooooo slow. The 348 pages could easily have been about 100 and been a more impactful/interesting story. The last 1/4 of the book was much better but not worth the journey to get there. How can this be so dense yet so empty? There’s just not enough meat here other than some general themes. 

On the other hand, Anna did a great job of making the reader understand the existence of middle sister. I felt the anxiety, the fear, the connections, the paranoid state of the community, etc. Maybe she just did too good of a job with the feelings of time passing, the long/drawn out thoughts of every moment, the mundane nature of every day life. When I got to the end I felt like a deserved a big payoff for making it through… but it sort of just fizzled out in a “life goes on” idea. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Emotional abuse, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Sexism, Sexual assault, Stalking, and Sexual harassment

Moderate: Animal death, Body shaming, Death, Gun violence, Homophobia, Mental illness, Rape, Toxic relationship, Violence, Police brutality, Medical content, Grief, Murder, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Gaslighting, War, and Injury/Injury detail

annick's review against another edition

dark funny reflective tense slow-paced

4.25

I was really moved by the writing style and the narrator with Belfast accent. The meandering and proustian narrative was one to embrace. But I did struggle to stay focused on the book. I had previously attempted to read it three time before I finally finished it. 

The collective and generational traumas of sectarian violence has so many layers of pain and numbness and miscommunication in this book. The narrator’s experience of being stalked by an unwanted older man, becomes hard to bear when she reveals she is  misunderstood and cannot trust any others to help her escape this situation with Milkman. 

I enjoyed the writing style.  No names but descriptions. But who was Jason ? And Neil? They were mentioned near the end. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Emotional abuse, Sexism, Stalking, and Sexual harassment

Moderate: Animal cruelty, Bullying, Child death, Death, Gun violence, Homophobia, Mental illness, Sexual assault, Toxic relationship, Violence, Blood, Police brutality, Murder, and Gaslighting

jlboro's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional funny reflective tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.0

This book is challenging and it will not be for everyone. First, you need to have more than a shallow understanding of The Troubles. (I recommend “Say Nothing” by Patrick Radden Keefe. It’s a fantastic book but even after reading I STILL don’t fully understand and that’s just bc The Troubles see so damn confusing to an outsider.) Second, you have to be okay with stream of consciousness and be okay with unusual diction. Third, you need to be open to taking a deep, deep dive into the mind of a teenager in an oppressive, tyrannical society. 

I listened to the audiobook and I HIGHLY recommend this if you’re struggling reading this book. I even read along at times. The narrator is Irish, she’s amazing, and I think she completely nails the tone of Middle-Sister, the secondary characters, and the community overall. I don’t want to say the audiobook is the ONLY way to approach this book, but it’s an experience.

This book is also oppressive. Belfast in the late 70s was an oppressive, tyrannical place, and, at times, I felt the heavy weight of judgment, mistrust, and reality-checks on my chest. You can feel everything bearing down on you all the time and I absolutely believe that this is only an inkling of how incredibly difficult it was to be a young woman during that time.

Could this book have been less dense? Is this book a little much with its rattling off? Sure. But how many 18-year-old brains aren’t bursting with extremes?! I think a lot of readers have completely missed the point when it comes to this. 

Anywho, this book is worth a read. It’s worth the challenge. It’s worth diving into and thinking deeply on how the environment can shape people, families, and communities. And it’s worth reflecting on how you would react if you were in Middle-Sister’s shoes. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Death, Mental illness, Sexism, Toxic relationship, Stalking, and Gaslighting

Moderate: Suicide, Violence, Grief, and War

travelseatsreads's review against another edition

challenging dark mysterious slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

3.0

I'm not entirely sure how to sum up Milkman or even quite how I feel about it, depending on the section of the book I was very firmly in love or hate territory!

Milkman is a story of our unnamed protagonist Third Sister as she quite literally buries her head in her favourites books and tries to get by in the manic world of The Troubles in Northern Ireland.

Burns uses a long flowing stream of conscious style format, which really works at times to get into the turmoil and chaos of the unusual events. However, in other seemingly irrelevant drawn out sections it had be pulling my hair out and losing concentration quite easily. 

The book has a very closed in claustrophobic nature to it which in hindsight was a fantastic portrayal of what everyone must have been feeling in those communities at the time, however it does make the book quite arduous to read. 

This is a book that demands your attention for every single word and insists you fully invest into it's quite unusual format. If you can immerse yourself fully then chances are you will love it.

For me, I found the first 40% dragged on and to be honest if I wasn't doing the buddy read hosted by @lostinlaurensbooks I probably would have given up. That said I did begin to enjoy it for the remaining 60% and am very glad I stuck with it.

A challenging immersive read which continues to split opinions however there's no doubt it is a great piece of literary fiction.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Animal cruelty, Animal death, Child death, Drug use, Gore, Gun violence, Hate crime, Mental illness, Racial slurs, Sexism, Sexual assault, Suicide, Torture, Toxic relationship, Violence, Blood, Police brutality, Kidnapping, Grief, Religious bigotry, Stalking, Murder, Fire/Fire injury, Sexual harassment, and War

sib_reads's review against another edition

challenging dark reflective tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

1.5

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Animal death, Child death, Death, Homophobia, Mental illness, Misogyny, Sexism, Suicide, Violence, Stalking, Death of parent, Murder, Sexual harassment, and Injury/Injury detail

Moderate: Animal cruelty, Emotional abuse, Gun violence, Infidelity, Toxic relationship, Gaslighting, Toxic friendship, and Abandonment

_sam_m's review against another edition

challenging dark mysterious slow-paced

3.0

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Mental illness, Misogyny, Suicide, Toxic relationship, Violence, Vomit, Stalking, and Gaslighting

annaf1tz's review against another edition

challenging slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Death, Toxic relationship, Violence, and War

Minor: Animal death

quickermorequickly's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional funny mysterious reflective tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

I don't know how else to describe the prose other than exhilaratingly dense (in the sense of thoughts being packed closely together). By turns frightening and funny, Burns deftly weaves the unnamed heroine's way through the psychological and social terrors of the Troubles. I felt her indignation, her dread, her bemusement, her numbness. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Death, Emotional abuse, Misogyny, Sexism, Vomit, Religious bigotry, Stalking, and Injury/Injury detail

Moderate: Child death, Gun violence, Homophobia, Toxic relationship, Violence, Xenophobia, Police brutality, Toxic friendship, and War

Minor: Suicide