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tess_me's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
reflective
slow-paced
4.0
Made me cry
Content Warnings
Graphic: Transphobia and Sexual content
lukasash's review against another edition
emotional
funny
informative
fast-paced
5.0
Content Warnings
Moderate: Sexual content
ninahuynh's review against another edition
emotional
inspiring
tense
medium-paced
5.0
A memoir to read! As someone who does not had body dysmorphia due to gender dysmorphia, this memoir really open my mind to another experience. I like the choice of it being a graphic novel, as it really illustrates the struggles Maia experienced. I also like the drafts at the end of the book. I enjoy seeing the process and how the art came to be.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Vomit, Blood, Medical trauma, Sexual content, Body shaming, and Transphobia
k_williams_15's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
fast-paced
5.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual content
Moderate: Blood, Medical trauma, and Outing
Minor: Excrement
With the content warnings, I feel it is important to note that nothing in this book depicts abuse or hate.rockythefreak's review
challenging
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
tense
slow-paced
5.0
I fell in love with the work. It made me feel like I got a deeper understanding of things my partner talks about, being nonbinary and asexual, using words that I feel like she struggles to find at times. It helped me find some words for my own feelings and experiences too. I am so grateful to this work and it's author.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Injury/Injury detail, Sexism, Medical content, Sexual content, Transphobia, Vomit, Blood, Body horror, Dysphoria, and Medical trauma
Moderate: Acephobia/Arophobia and Bullying
Minor: Incest
Very brief child nudity (not sexualized). Children are depicted urinating outside. Brief but graphic images of urine and vomit and feces. As for incest, it is discussed vaguely. It is only noticable if you're familiar with the pop culture reference where the incest takes place. Details:roaming_enn's review against another edition
fast-paced
4.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual content
Moderate: Body horror
koreanlinda's review against another edition
hopeful
informative
inspiring
lighthearted
reflective
fast-paced
4.25
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual content
Moderate: Transphobia
athenian_frog's review
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
lighthearted
reflective
medium-paced
4.0
I thought this was a really cool look into the thoughts of someone who is genderqueer. I am cisgender, and have limited experience reading about/in the perspective of nonbinary/trans identities. I can only recount one other book where I’ve seen someone use e/em/eir (which, I also didn’t know they were under Spivak pronouns. Neat!).
I felt like Kobabe was very thoughtful about how eir experiences and upbringing affected how e approached eir gender. I found it funny that fanfiction and queer artists remain avenues through which LGBTQIA+ people have sought self discovery. E touches on a lot of other aspects of being queer, such as grappling with how one experiences sexual and romantic attraction, the different ways loved ones can react, and how one’s identity can affect existing relationships.
The illustrations served the story well. The one about the first Pap smear e had was especially striking. There are some very pretty page long spreads, and some good uses of space to place text in a thematically relevant way. The ending was a little puzzling, but I like to imagine it is hopeful in its implications.
I think this could be a good intro for someone who is questioning if they are transgender, or even just queer in general. It does not shy away from the bodily discomfort one can experience as a non-binary person. There are discussions of first periods, Pap smears, masturbation, and intimacy with other people. Sexual drive (and the deficit thereof, in Kobabe’s case) is also visited.
People who are cisgender could also benefit from listening to this perspective; now more than ever, I think, it’s critical to be aware of the existence of non binary/transgender individuals, and the struggles they may be experiencing.
Thank you for reading!
I felt like Kobabe was very thoughtful about how eir experiences and upbringing affected how e approached eir gender. I found it funny that fanfiction and queer artists remain avenues through which LGBTQIA+ people have sought self discovery. E touches on a lot of other aspects of being queer, such as grappling with how one experiences sexual and romantic attraction, the different ways loved ones can react, and how one’s identity can affect existing relationships.
The illustrations served the story well. The one about the first Pap smear e had was especially striking. There are some very pretty page long spreads, and some good uses of space to place text in a thematically relevant way. The ending was a little puzzling, but I like to imagine it is hopeful in its implications.
I think this could be a good intro for someone who is questioning if they are transgender, or even just queer in general. It does not shy away from the bodily discomfort one can experience as a non-binary person. There are discussions of first periods, Pap smears, masturbation, and intimacy with other people. Sexual drive (and the deficit thereof, in Kobabe’s case) is also visited.
People who are cisgender could also benefit from listening to this perspective; now more than ever, I think, it’s critical to be aware of the existence of non binary/transgender individuals, and the struggles they may be experiencing.
Thank you for reading!
Content Warnings
Moderate: Blood, Vomit, Dysphoria, and Medical trauma
Minor: Sexual content and Deadnaming
There is vomiting depicted in the latter half of the book in a panel after a doctor visit. There is some deadnaming as people react to the new pronouns the author starts using. Another character has the wrong pronouns used repeatedly but these pronouns are blacked out usually. There is medical trauma/fear revolving around Pap smears in general. A bloody medical tool is depicted. Descriptions of pain involving the Pap smears sound very painful, may be disturbing to some readers. Dysphoria and frustration with the inconclusiveness of one’s identity are themes in the book. There is a lot of awareness the author has over eir body due to established gender roles and peers. There are some sexual scenes vaguely depicted, such as: sexting, use of a strapon for oral, descriptions of masturbation techniques.theaceofpages's review against another edition
emotional
fast-paced
3.0
Like many people, I first heard about this book because of all the controversy surrounding it by the (far) right/conservatives. As an agender person I am always interested to find books with non-binary characters and I was interested to see what all the fuss is about. My library got a copy at some point so I decided to read it and find out.
Honestly? I was underwhelmed. Please note that this doesn't come from a place of hate. Again, I am agender so I understand how difficult it can be to live in a world where gender seems to be so central to everything. There were definitely some experiences that I related to, but overall? It was honestly just okay. Books with this kind of representation are so important. Gender non-conforming people are so often othered, even in queer spaces and seeing that there are others like you can be such a wonderful moment. But (and this is probably an unpopular opinion) I don't think that this book would be nearly as popular as it is if it weren't for all the controversy around it and people trying to ban it. While the representation is obviously important, I didn't think it was that special? (Please don't come for me!). I went in expecting to enjoy it, but it didn't quite hit the mark for me. I completely understand why people may love it, but I feel like while it explores deeply personal aspects of the author's identity, it fails to look beyond that very much. I know that this is a memoir, but given the limited knowledge most people have on the topic, this is an important part of these kinds of stories. At least for now.
While the author says that ey aren't misogynistic (and I am happy to believe em), the book does perpetuate a lot of stereotypes about what it means to be a woman. A lot of statements surrounding this made by other people (e.g. eir aunt and mother - and eir mother is even super supportive of eir identity - something many trans and gender non-conforming people don't have) are just brushed aside. I know that these kinds of statements are deeply problematic and that you are who you are and don't owe anyine a deep explanation. I get that this comes from a gender mismatch. But I know a lot of people have seen it otherwise. I think giving more space to just explaining this could have gone a long way. Yes, maybe ey don't owe an explanation, but if ey are going to share eir experiences with the public giving it helps immensely. Yes, queerphobes will hate whatever is said, but it will help educate those who are looking to understand. A lot of experiences are just kind of given. While I see what the author was going for here, I do think some reflection on some of eir experiences now that ey have a better understanding of who ey are could have added so much to the book. I feel like this book is more about representation than a message. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing, bit we still very much need a stronger education aspect for non-binary identies. I probably wouldn't recommend it to someone who is looking to learn about them, but rather someone who understands them already and wants to learn more about non-binary experiences.
I feel like I haven't properly gotten all my opinions down here because I have very mixed views about this book. I might rewrite parts of this at some point. But is it as bad as the conservatives make it out to be? No . Especially since it's no even intended for young children? Is it an incredible and deep exploration of non-binaryness? Also no, but it does show how parts of how uncomfortable it is to live in a deeply gendered world. Would I recommend it? Probably. Maybe. It depends on who is asking. It's definitely not a bad book. It's deeply personal and the author put a lot of strength and bravery into telling eir story. But I do still wish it was more and maybe actually reflected on some of these experiences. I think exploring and re olving some of the discussions ey had had about eir identity could have helped a lot - especially as critics bring up some of the same points that ey never really dug into in the book beyond saying that the other person was wrong. The ending is also kind of abrupt so ey could even have included a deeper explanation at the end (possibly in text form as I can imagine it could be difficult to explain in graphic novel form).
Honestly? I was underwhelmed. Please note that this doesn't come from a place of hate. Again, I am agender so I understand how difficult it can be to live in a world where gender seems to be so central to everything. There were definitely some experiences that I related to, but overall? It was honestly just okay. Books with this kind of representation are so important. Gender non-conforming people are so often othered, even in queer spaces and seeing that there are others like you can be such a wonderful moment. But (and this is probably an unpopular opinion) I don't think that this book would be nearly as popular as it is if it weren't for all the controversy around it and people trying to ban it. While the representation is obviously important, I didn't think it was that special? (Please don't come for me!). I went in expecting to enjoy it, but it didn't quite hit the mark for me. I completely understand why people may love it, but I feel like while it explores deeply personal aspects of the author's identity, it fails to look beyond that very much. I know that this is a memoir, but given the limited knowledge most people have on the topic, this is an important part of these kinds of stories. At least for now.
While the author says that ey aren't misogynistic (and I am happy to believe em), the book does perpetuate a lot of stereotypes about what it means to be a woman. A lot of statements surrounding this made by other people (e.g. eir aunt and mother - and eir mother is even super supportive of eir identity - something many trans and gender non-conforming people don't have) are just brushed aside. I know that these kinds of statements are deeply problematic and that you are who you are and don't owe anyine a deep explanation. I get that this comes from a gender mismatch. But I know a lot of people have seen it otherwise. I think giving more space to just explaining this could have gone a long way. Yes, maybe ey don't owe an explanation, but if ey are going to share eir experiences with the public giving it helps immensely. Yes, queerphobes will hate whatever is said, but it will help educate those who are looking to understand. A lot of experiences are just kind of given. While I see what the author was going for here, I do think some reflection on some of eir experiences now that ey have a better understanding of who ey are could have added so much to the book. I feel like this book is more about representation than a message. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing, bit we still very much need a stronger education aspect for non-binary identies. I probably wouldn't recommend it to someone who is looking to learn about them, but rather someone who understands them already and wants to learn more about non-binary experiences.
I feel like I haven't properly gotten all my opinions down here because I have very mixed views about this book. I might rewrite parts of this at some point. But is it as bad as the conservatives make it out to be? No . Especially since it's no even intended for young children? Is it an incredible and deep exploration of non-binaryness? Also no, but it does show how parts of how uncomfortable it is to live in a deeply gendered world. Would I recommend it? Probably. Maybe. It depends on who is asking. It's definitely not a bad book. It's deeply personal and the author put a lot of strength and bravery into telling eir story. But I do still wish it was more and maybe actually reflected on some of these experiences. I think exploring and re olving some of the discussions ey had had about eir identity could have helped a lot - especially as critics bring up some of the same points that ey never really dug into in the book beyond saying that the other person was wrong. The ending is also kind of abrupt so ey could even have included a deeper explanation at the end (possibly in text form as I can imagine it could be difficult to explain in graphic novel form).
Content Warnings
Graphic: Dysphoria
Moderate: Medical trauma, Sexual content, and Transphobia
Minor: Misogyny and Blood
cymbal_curtain's review against another edition
emotional
funny
tense
medium-paced
3.0
This book was ok. This is a book about growing up queer mostly. about question gender and sexuality and about hanging out with friends and partners.
1) this book presents "brain sexes" as a scientific truth. This is instead a very controversial topic, without scientific consensus. read the linked for more info (it backs up my claim and is a scientific journal)
1) this book presents "brain sexes" as a scientific truth. This is instead a very controversial topic, without scientific consensus. read the linked for more info (it backs up my claim and is a scientific journal)
https://bsd.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s13293-022-00448-w
2) it, if not misinforms, at least confuses, the reader about what "asexual" means. Although the word has some multiple meanings, it primarily means not experiencing attraction, not "not masturbating". And it's fine to me if the author identifies/identified to some extent with the label, but because this is a book I'm a bit disappointed about this.
cws:
I can't list this in the storygraph system as a content warning, but the book does contain romance.
2) it, if not misinforms, at least confuses, the reader about what "asexual" means. Although the word has some multiple meanings, it primarily means not experiencing attraction, not "not masturbating". And it's fine to me if the author identifies/identified to some extent with the label, but because this is a book I'm a bit disappointed about this.
cws:
I can't list this in the storygraph system as a content warning, but the book does contain romance.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Dysphoria
Moderate: Sexual content and Medical content
Minor: Deadnaming and Outing