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fbroom's review
5.0
It's not an easy read. I've never read diaries before. scattered text. unfinished thoughts. random events.
You can't rate this book the way you rate other books. My rating is based on how much I was touched by the book.
Some of my highlights (I wish I highlighted more ...)
Highlights from my kindle
"The really important thing is not to reject anything—When I think how I wavered about actually coming up to Cal! That I actually considered not accepting this new experience! How disastrous (although I would have never known!) that would have been. I’ll really know what to do in Chicago when I get there—I’ll begin right by going out and grabbing at experience, not waiting for it to come to me—I can do that now because the Great Barrier is down—the feeling of sanctity about my body—I have always been full of lust—as I am now—but I have always been placing conceptual obstacles in my own path … Secretly, I have always realized my unlimited passionateness, but no outlet seemed patterned or proper enough"
"The idea of writing has driven every idea out of my head.” … “It’s so painful to be always at the starting-point …"
"I don’t care if it’s lousy. The only way to learn how to write is to write. The excuse that what one is contemplating isn’t good enough"
"On Keeping a Journal. Superficial to understand the journal as just a receptacle for one’s private, secret thoughts—like a confidante who is deaf, dumb, and illiterate. In the journal I do not just express myself more openly than I could do to any person; I create myself. The journal is a vehicle for my sense of selfhood. It represents me as emotionally and spiritually independent. Therefore (alas) it does not simply record my actual, daily life but rather—in many cases—offers an alternative to it"
"The fear of becoming old is born of the recognition that one is not living now the life that one wishes. It is equivalent to a sense of abusing the present"
You can't rate this book the way you rate other books. My rating is based on how much I was touched by the book.
Some of my highlights (I wish I highlighted more ...)
Highlights from my kindle
"The really important thing is not to reject anything—When I think how I wavered about actually coming up to Cal! That I actually considered not accepting this new experience! How disastrous (although I would have never known!) that would have been. I’ll really know what to do in Chicago when I get there—I’ll begin right by going out and grabbing at experience, not waiting for it to come to me—I can do that now because the Great Barrier is down—the feeling of sanctity about my body—I have always been full of lust—as I am now—but I have always been placing conceptual obstacles in my own path … Secretly, I have always realized my unlimited passionateness, but no outlet seemed patterned or proper enough"
"The idea of writing has driven every idea out of my head.” … “It’s so painful to be always at the starting-point …"
"I don’t care if it’s lousy. The only way to learn how to write is to write. The excuse that what one is contemplating isn’t good enough"
"On Keeping a Journal. Superficial to understand the journal as just a receptacle for one’s private, secret thoughts—like a confidante who is deaf, dumb, and illiterate. In the journal I do not just express myself more openly than I could do to any person; I create myself. The journal is a vehicle for my sense of selfhood. It represents me as emotionally and spiritually independent. Therefore (alas) it does not simply record my actual, daily life but rather—in many cases—offers an alternative to it"
"The fear of becoming old is born of the recognition that one is not living now the life that one wishes. It is equivalent to a sense of abusing the present"
madeleinegeorge's review
3.0
An amazingly fast and revealing read from one of the generation’s greatest thinkers and storytellers. With her son David’s editing prowess, we skip through the beating subconscious underneath some of her greatest work: it’s fascinating the hear the inner turmoil, the greater questions, the doubts and heartache and befuddlement that she kept running up against in her early career. Though this set of journals was markedly before the notoriety and fame that would come with the seventies, her incredible attention to detail and prosaic exploration carries the seeds of the philosophy and societal commentary she would be known for.
Particularly, I found her compulsion with Djuna Barnes’ Nightwood to be interesting: she returns to it again and again, especially in the way it explicates and handles and weaponizes love. I am tempted to reread it, if only to further contextualize Sontag’s later “Against Interpretation” and “Where the Stress Falls”, if not others. For whatever reason, I think it articulates for her something about the relationship between the heart and the body, the mind and the heart, how one is inseparable from the other, how one cannot control either. I think Nightwood might have served as a kind of metonym for this idea for Sontag, something she maybe was unwilling to confront with her own prose. Which, fair enough. But I’m speculating.
A facet of her work that is incredibly clear in these journals is her unification of the sacred and the profane— in realizing the innate impulse artists, as well as (she would argue) everyone, has toward unity and Wholeness and our aversion to division, especially when it comes to the body. She would publish one of her magnum opus regarding this very topic three years after this set of journals end.
A fascinating read, if a little voyeuristic at times.
Essentials:
“It hurts to love. It’s like giving yourself to be flayed and knowing that at any moment the other person may just walk off with your skin.”
“Alone, alone, alone. A ventroloquist’s dummy without a ventriloquist. I have brain-fatigue and heart-ache. Where is peace, the center?"
“If this love is hopeless, there is no use reviling oneself— suffer it, let consciousness of its manifest grotesqueness help it to pass.”
“Life is suicide, mediated. […] The private life, the private life. Struggling to float my pieties, idealisms. All statements not to be divded into true + false. This can be done, trivially. But then the meaning is mostly bleached out. Being self-conscious. Treating one’s self as an other. Supervising oneself. I am lazy, vain, indiscreet. I laugh when I’m not amused. What is the secret of suddenly beginning to write, finding a voice? Try whiskey. Also being warm.”
“Short cut: don’t call sex sex. Call it an investigation (not an experience, not a demonstration of love) into the body of the other person. Each time one learns one new thing. Most Americans start making love as if they were jumping out of a window with their eyes closed."
“In the journal I do not just express myself more openly than I could do to any person; I create myself. The journal is a vehicle for my sense of selfhood. It represents me as emotionally and spiritually independent. Therefore (alas) it does not simply record my actual, daily life but rather— in many cases— offers an alternative to it.”
“My ‘I’ is puny, cautious, too sane. Good writers are roaring egoists, even to the point of fatuity. Sane me, critics, correct them— but their sanity is a parasitic on the creative faculty of genius.”
“To be defensive invites, incites the other person to offend. Remember! X looks abjectly-lovingly at Y; Y is irritated by mounting self-reproaches, which are resented as being undeserved; therefore Y feels compelled to be brutal to X. Sadism, hostility as essential element in love. Therefore it’s important that love be a transaction of hositlities. Lesson: not to surrender one’s heart where it’s not wanted."
Particularly, I found her compulsion with Djuna Barnes’ Nightwood to be interesting: she returns to it again and again, especially in the way it explicates and handles and weaponizes love. I am tempted to reread it, if only to further contextualize Sontag’s later “Against Interpretation” and “Where the Stress Falls”, if not others. For whatever reason, I think it articulates for her something about the relationship between the heart and the body, the mind and the heart, how one is inseparable from the other, how one cannot control either. I think Nightwood might have served as a kind of metonym for this idea for Sontag, something she maybe was unwilling to confront with her own prose. Which, fair enough. But I’m speculating.
A facet of her work that is incredibly clear in these journals is her unification of the sacred and the profane— in realizing the innate impulse artists, as well as (she would argue) everyone, has toward unity and Wholeness and our aversion to division, especially when it comes to the body. She would publish one of her magnum opus regarding this very topic three years after this set of journals end.
A fascinating read, if a little voyeuristic at times.
Essentials:
“It hurts to love. It’s like giving yourself to be flayed and knowing that at any moment the other person may just walk off with your skin.”
“Alone, alone, alone. A ventroloquist’s dummy without a ventriloquist. I have brain-fatigue and heart-ache. Where is peace, the center?"
“If this love is hopeless, there is no use reviling oneself— suffer it, let consciousness of its manifest grotesqueness help it to pass.”
“Life is suicide, mediated. […] The private life, the private life. Struggling to float my pieties, idealisms. All statements not to be divded into true + false. This can be done, trivially. But then the meaning is mostly bleached out. Being self-conscious. Treating one’s self as an other. Supervising oneself. I am lazy, vain, indiscreet. I laugh when I’m not amused. What is the secret of suddenly beginning to write, finding a voice? Try whiskey. Also being warm.”
“Short cut: don’t call sex sex. Call it an investigation (not an experience, not a demonstration of love) into the body of the other person. Each time one learns one new thing. Most Americans start making love as if they were jumping out of a window with their eyes closed."
“In the journal I do not just express myself more openly than I could do to any person; I create myself. The journal is a vehicle for my sense of selfhood. It represents me as emotionally and spiritually independent. Therefore (alas) it does not simply record my actual, daily life but rather— in many cases— offers an alternative to it.”
“My ‘I’ is puny, cautious, too sane. Good writers are roaring egoists, even to the point of fatuity. Sane me, critics, correct them— but their sanity is a parasitic on the creative faculty of genius.”
“To be defensive invites, incites the other person to offend. Remember! X looks abjectly-lovingly at Y; Y is irritated by mounting self-reproaches, which are resented as being undeserved; therefore Y feels compelled to be brutal to X. Sadism, hostility as essential element in love. Therefore it’s important that love be a transaction of hositlities. Lesson: not to surrender one’s heart where it’s not wanted."
catarinalobo's review against another edition
5.0
“Quero dormir com muitas pessoas - quero viver e ter ódio de morrer - não vou lecionar, nem fazer o mestrado depois da graduação... Não pretendo deixar que meu intelecto me domine e a última coisa que quero é cultuar o conhecimento ou as pessoas que têm conhecimento! Não dou a mínima para o acúmulo de fatos de ninguém, exceto quando se tratar de uma reflexão sobre sensibilidade elementar, de que eu de fato preciso... Quero fazer tudo... ter um modo de avaliar a experiência - se me causa prazer ou dor, e tenho de ser muito cuidadosa quanto a rejeitar a dor - tenho de perceber a presença do prazer em toda parte e encontrá-lo também, pois ele está em toda parte! Quero me envolver completamente...tudo é importante! A única coisa que renuncio é a capacidade de renunciar, de recusar: a aceitação da mesmice e do intelecto. Eu estou viva... eu sou linda... o que mais existe?”
23/5/49 - p.23
23/5/49 - p.23
jessianekelly_'s review against another edition
5.0
"31/12/57
No diário eu não apenas exprimo a mim mesma de modo mais aberto do que poderia fazer com qualquer pessoa; eu me crio."
Nossa, eu devorei esse livro.
Sempre fui de escrever diários, mas nunca fui de ler diários. Gostei quando seu filho, David Rieff, ressaltou que se trata de uma escolha moral publicar algo tão íntimo. Mas fico contente que o tenha feito, pois assim pude ter o acesso ao quanto Susan foi uma pessoa interessante e...humana. Suas anotações de livros para ler, dos filmes que assistiu, suas dores, seus relacionamentos (nada pacíficos), suas reflexões, tudo isso ecoou em mim de um jeito muito profundo. Quando ela dizia que ia ler diário de algum teórico talvez não tenha pensado que, algum dia, na lista de livros de alguém, estaria o seu.
No diário eu não apenas exprimo a mim mesma de modo mais aberto do que poderia fazer com qualquer pessoa; eu me crio."
Nossa, eu devorei esse livro.
Sempre fui de escrever diários, mas nunca fui de ler diários. Gostei quando seu filho, David Rieff, ressaltou que se trata de uma escolha moral publicar algo tão íntimo. Mas fico contente que o tenha feito, pois assim pude ter o acesso ao quanto Susan foi uma pessoa interessante e...humana. Suas anotações de livros para ler, dos filmes que assistiu, suas dores, seus relacionamentos (nada pacíficos), suas reflexões, tudo isso ecoou em mim de um jeito muito profundo. Quando ela dizia que ia ler diário de algum teórico talvez não tenha pensado que, algum dia, na lista de livros de alguém, estaria o seu.
lenawadera's review against another edition
To nie jest pozycja dla każdego. Nierówna, momentami poszarpana, obszerne fragmenty wytargane z kontekstu, którego być może nie potrafiła uchwycić nawet sama Sontag. Dla mnie to uczta, bo ja uwielbiam zerkać do gryzmołów innych ludzi, bez względu na to, czy znajdę tam epopeję ich życia, czy niekończące się listy książek, oper, zakupów.
galatee's review against another edition
5.0
susan how DARE you read my mind like this
— the diary of a growing woman, exploring both her Judaism and lesbianism while documenting her numerous cultural discoveries, from movies to books to pieces of classical music. composed of both intimate thoughts about repressed feelings and destructive relationships and more general ones about literature, philosophy, art or even love, this book is as rich as Sontag’s mind and lively life in NYC, Paris, and other places where she meets other great figures of the 20th century.
“My desire to write is connected with my homosexuality. I need the identity as a weapon, to match the weapon that society has against me. It doesn’t justify my homosexuality. But it would give me — I feel — a license. I am just becoming aware of how guilty I feel being queer. […] Being queer makes me feel more vulnerable. It increases my wish to hide, to be invisible — which I’ve always felt anyway.”
— the diary of a growing woman, exploring both her Judaism and lesbianism while documenting her numerous cultural discoveries, from movies to books to pieces of classical music. composed of both intimate thoughts about repressed feelings and destructive relationships and more general ones about literature, philosophy, art or even love, this book is as rich as Sontag’s mind and lively life in NYC, Paris, and other places where she meets other great figures of the 20th century.
“My desire to write is connected with my homosexuality. I need the identity as a weapon, to match the weapon that society has against me. It doesn’t justify my homosexuality. But it would give me — I feel — a license. I am just becoming aware of how guilty I feel being queer. […] Being queer makes me feel more vulnerable. It increases my wish to hide, to be invisible — which I’ve always felt anyway.”
julieirene's review
4.0
There is a better review than what I could write in the Chronicle of Higher Education from December: http://chronicle.com/temp/reprint.php?id=v1xvs1p6k37s7jtw4qpfj7pqykln5z50
I enjoyed the book very much, though it took me nearly 3 months to complete. As always, even in her jottings and short notes, Sontag offers much to chew on. I'm not sure I trust her son's editing choices and would prefer access to an unabridged version. Some entries are tedious - long lists of authors and books to read (she was quite voracious!), but overall a very profound glimpse into Sontag in her earlier years. I am looking forward to future publishings of her later notebooks!
I enjoyed the book very much, though it took me nearly 3 months to complete. As always, even in her jottings and short notes, Sontag offers much to chew on. I'm not sure I trust her son's editing choices and would prefer access to an unabridged version. Some entries are tedious - long lists of authors and books to read (she was quite voracious!), but overall a very profound glimpse into Sontag in her earlier years. I am looking forward to future publishings of her later notebooks!