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3.72 AVERAGE
3.72 AVERAGE
Liked it... didn't love it. Was a pleasant enough audio book.
I was surprised that this would be a two star book for me, although I also gave up before the family and identity sections. I don't listen to the author's podcast but had enjoyed hearing her interviewed on other podcasts, so I thought I would like to book. I found it pretty shallow and structurally repetitive, introducing a topic, collecting anecdotes, adding experiences from the author's life, touching on everyone's experiences briefly, and then wrapping up.
Started off strong. But was just a series of anecdotes that each had a pat moral. Just ok.
I learned quite a bit about difficult conversations and I enjoyed the book very much.
emotional
informative
inspiring
reflective
fast-paced
Truly is an eye opener about conversations many of us avoid. Lots of great examples and stories to line up with the topics. I feel everyone could benefit learning a thing or two about addressing these topics with people whether the people are close to you or complete strangers. Definitely also beneficial for bosses to understand people of different backgrounds.
3.5
I love Anna Sale’s interview style and I love Death Sex and Money. I feel like this book was a chance to really dig in— but that’s my bias and what I’m craving. Instead, I feel like she created a primer for intro folks learning the basics of navigating feelings content and how to start those convos. And Lord knows the world needs that. So: good job and I hope this book is helpful to those starting out.
I love Anna Sale’s interview style and I love Death Sex and Money. I feel like this book was a chance to really dig in— but that’s my bias and what I’m craving. Instead, I feel like she created a primer for intro folks learning the basics of navigating feelings content and how to start those convos. And Lord knows the world needs that. So: good job and I hope this book is helpful to those starting out.
Overall I enjoyed this book. Anna Sale shares perspective gained from her own personal relationships as well we many interviews for her Podcast- Death, Sex and Money. She focuses on the "hard things" such as death, sex, money, family, and identity. There were times when I put it down to take a break because it was not grabbing me but there were several things resonated with me throughout the book, parts that I re read several times because they gave me pause or shifted my awareness. A few things that stood out for me involved money, family, and identity. I share them below:
When talking about money, she shared words of a Financial Psychologist Brad Klontz. Klontz talks about four scripts that each of us run in our minds about money. He says that almost all people can be categorized into these four scripts (money vigilance, money worship, money avoidance, and money status). She said that sometimes even couples that agree what to save and what to spend money on, can struggle if they have different money scripts or ideals. Talking about it is key. She also interviewed a past employee of Facebook who made billions of dollars over 3 years. He started a non-profit to try to change the misconception that hard work always leads to financial security. He does not believe that this is so and he emphasizes the difference between income and wealth, with wealth having much to do with factors other than hard work. I agree with this but his way of explaining it reached me differently. And wow is this important.
Another thing that struck me was about family. She interviewed Michael Nichols, a family therapist. He says "family is where we tend to lose our maturity", "we may aspire to be patient, loving, and kind with the people we are related to, but we're often reactive, indignant, and closed off. That is because most of us become teenagers in the presence of family members, who we are in our families is built of long standing patterns and roles. We did not get to know these people as evolved and charming adults, they know our triggers, and often what created them. Sometimes the lens that our families see us through can be outdated. We want to understand our origins and connections but we want our individuality to be understood. I could really relate to this part.
She also ended with a chapter on identity. I think those of us (like me) who are from a majority group- white, cis gendered, heterosexual, physically abled, etc.) do not take as much time to consider our identity and how it shapes our views. She provides this gift of an idea that learning about other people's perspectives, those with different identities, is vital. For me, that work will never end.
So yes, I recommend this book for some. I gave it a 4 instead of a 5 because there were a few boring parts but that could have been because I was tired or struggling with focus over the days I read it.
enjoy!
When talking about money, she shared words of a Financial Psychologist Brad Klontz. Klontz talks about four scripts that each of us run in our minds about money. He says that almost all people can be categorized into these four scripts (money vigilance, money worship, money avoidance, and money status). She said that sometimes even couples that agree what to save and what to spend money on, can struggle if they have different money scripts or ideals. Talking about it is key. She also interviewed a past employee of Facebook who made billions of dollars over 3 years. He started a non-profit to try to change the misconception that hard work always leads to financial security. He does not believe that this is so and he emphasizes the difference between income and wealth, with wealth having much to do with factors other than hard work. I agree with this but his way of explaining it reached me differently. And wow is this important.
Another thing that struck me was about family. She interviewed Michael Nichols, a family therapist. He says "family is where we tend to lose our maturity", "we may aspire to be patient, loving, and kind with the people we are related to, but we're often reactive, indignant, and closed off. That is because most of us become teenagers in the presence of family members, who we are in our families is built of long standing patterns and roles. We did not get to know these people as evolved and charming adults, they know our triggers, and often what created them. Sometimes the lens that our families see us through can be outdated. We want to understand our origins and connections but we want our individuality to be understood. I could really relate to this part.
She also ended with a chapter on identity. I think those of us (like me) who are from a majority group- white, cis gendered, heterosexual, physically abled, etc.) do not take as much time to consider our identity and how it shapes our views. She provides this gift of an idea that learning about other people's perspectives, those with different identities, is vital. For me, that work will never end.
So yes, I recommend this book for some. I gave it a 4 instead of a 5 because there were a few boring parts but that could have been because I was tired or struggling with focus over the days I read it.
enjoy!
Somehow, despite being about hard things, I missed the fact that this book would force me into uncomfortable spaces and thoughts while I was reading it. Challenging but useful.
I really enjoy Anna’s Death Sex and Money podcast, and I’m finding I prefer her storytelling in podcast form. This is a fairly short book and is trying to tackle many big hard things - the vignettes with individual interviews for each section doesn’t feel like enough to do the subject justice the way a whole podcast episode does.