Reviews with content warning for Deadnaming - Detransition, Baby

i have a lot of thoughts about this book. i tried to read it about a year ago and it didn’t take but i love the premise of this book and i really wanted to persevere this time!

i don’t know how to feel about the characters, they’re all quite selfish in their own way BUT they do have reasons for a lot of their behaviour? so i could not pick a favourite (or least favourite) either way
it wasn’t as funny as i was told it would be :(
i thought it was incredibly interesting to see the trans experience from the perspectives of all three parties involved. i have learnt a Lot about trans culture from this book, and although it is not the experience of every single trans person i feel like i am now in a better place to understand than i was before.
i didn’t know the ending of this book before i read it so as i was going through i was thinking
why don’t they have the baby yet Ugh why is this just 350 pages of them before having the baby!!??? and then i read the final chapter and understood why
overall it was a struggle to read because of the long chapters and sooo much description but i did end up enjoying it a bit in the end

Content Warnings

auudrey's review against another edition

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challenging emotional informative reflective medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? It's complicated
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

Content Warnings

talonsontypewriters's review against another edition

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challenging emotional reflective slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

Content Warnings

friendofdorothea's review against another edition

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challenging slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? No
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.75

I feel bad rating this book so low because it is written by a trans author through such a big publishing company. But it was really bad, and I would have DNF'd if I didn't find an audiobook because the book kept jumping to random moments in time or rants that had no correlation to the plot of the book. There was way too many words and there needed to be like 10 more editors. And with all of the words that were written, I think maybe only 5 pages actually focused on the plot. There were 50+ pages in every chapter, the text was super small and it was extremely inaccessible. Also, the thinking in the book was so flawed and most of the characters sucked, especially Reese who just seemed like a really bad person. There was also so much misogyny and transmisogyny that was not okay. There have been so many positive reviews because people have seen this book as a learning experience, but some of the ways in which this book looks at the world is not okay. I would recommend reading, watching, or listening to some other form of trans media to learn about transness: I.e., Transgender History by Susan Stryker, Paris is Burning, Disclosure, Pose, Gender Outlaw by Judith Butler, hell even Euphoria is a better representation of transness. There is so much wordy writing to get through to learn anything about transness. Also the book seemed to erase non-binary identities a lot of the time and there was no consideration that Ames could have been genderfluid or another non-binary identity. There was so much focus on transness as one thing rather than the expansiveness of transness. The basis of transness is not medicalization and the book almost implied that is the only way to be trans. If a cis person picked this up with no prior knowledge of transness, it could be super harmful especially because most of the reviews are saying this book is a learning guide for them.

The book saw children as merely property. Additionally, womanhood was seen mostly as caring for children or having a baby which is inherently sexist.

The book was supposed to be funny but nothing about it was funny whatsoever. The summary made it seem like these women were going to be raising a baby together and that’s what I was expecting to see within the first couple chapters not just filler. The ambiguous ending sucked.
10/10 do not recommend and I am surprised by the overwhelming amount of positive reviews. THIS IS NOT GOOD TRANS REPRESENTATION AND DO NOT PICK THIS UP TO LEARN ABOUT TRANS PEOPLE! I really wanted to root for a trans author but im sorry this book was not the one.

All of these characters deeply need therapy tbh (preferably feminist therapy)

Content Warnings

emjcn's review against another edition

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challenging dark emotional funny informative inspiring reflective tense medium-paced

Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.75

The NUANCE!!! I feel so seen.

Content Warnings

leontyna's review against another edition

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challenging emotional medium-paced

4.0

This book felt vulgar in its realism at first, I felt like a peeping creeper, watching lives so different to my own. Yet I could not stop reading and at some point it unlocked a completely new perspective on a topic I felt so educated about when I bought this book. Now I know how little I know and understand.
The book itself waa very engaging, I really liked the perspecrive and chronological shifts.

Content Warnings

biab00's review against another edition

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funny reflective sad medium-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Character
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? It's complicated
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

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