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niniane's review
3.75
I read the first half of Part 1 (Understanding TCKs), all of Part 2 (TCK Profile), and the second half of Part 3 (Enjoying the Journey and the Adult TCKs).
TCKs tend to delve past chitchat quickly because they want to know people before they leave. They skip past superficial topics and go to confessional / deep topics.
Some TCKs avoid attachments because they are used to goodbyes.
Some keep moving every few years.
Some rebel because they can't fit into any culture due to their unique blend. But rebelling means they are reacting and not actually defining themselves.
TCKs tend to delve past chitchat quickly because they want to know people before they leave. They skip past superficial topics and go to confessional / deep topics.
Some TCKs avoid attachments because they are used to goodbyes.
Some keep moving every few years.
Some rebel because they can't fit into any culture due to their unique blend. But rebelling means they are reacting and not actually defining themselves.
curlypip's review
1.0
I found this and incredibly tedious read, and was honestly pretty bored throughout, which, as someone who has lived in four countries and is raising mixed-race children outside of our passport country, is a shame, because I really wanted to like it. The authors seem to obsessed with fixing labels to people and their experiences, creating diagrams and charts that state the bloody obvious, describing them in such enthusiastic terms that you would think they’ve found the meaning of life. It’s academic study for the sake of it.
I also found it pretty negative, talking a lot about all the losses you experience as a TCK while glossing over the gains.
Unfortunately, the book can be summed up by a quote from Dave Pollock “I’m likely not going to tell you something you don’t know, but you just don’t know that you know it yet”. Otherwise known as writing a really long book about not very much at all.
If, by some miracle, you still want to read it, focus on the section on the transition experience itself, where there was some useful info (the only reason the book earned 1 star)
I also found it pretty negative, talking a lot about all the losses you experience as a TCK while glossing over the gains.
Unfortunately, the book can be summed up by a quote from Dave Pollock “I’m likely not going to tell you something you don’t know, but you just don’t know that you know it yet”. Otherwise known as writing a really long book about not very much at all.
If, by some miracle, you still want to read it, focus on the section on the transition experience itself, where there was some useful info (the only reason the book earned 1 star)
ridgewaygirl's review
4.0
Years ago, when I was moving between two countries, I was given a stack of cassette tapes of talks given by David C. Pollock]], so the contents of the book were more a reminder than new information. I will say that several of the points he makes were enormously helpful a decade ago and are still just as useful to anyone moving to another country. His emphasis in this book is on how to help children make the adjustments needed to thrive in a new culture, how to return to their original country later and how having been raised in more than one culture can be both a great enhancement and a challenge, but the contents will also be valuable to any adult in that situation.
This summer, I packed up a household of children, pets and things and followed my SO out to Germany. It's an adventure and a great opportunity for the kids to see Europe, now that they're old enough to remember it. But there are challenges involved in moving them away from their familiar places and people. Reading Third Culture Kids has been useful in helping me to prepare the kids for the experience.
Some of the things that stood out was the reminder that no matter how difficult the adjustment, there will be a time, a few months down the road, when everyday activities are routine. I remind myself of that daily. He also emphasized the importance of leaving the previous place with good-byes said, parties attended and any conflicts resolved before you leave. Knowing that people care about you and will miss you does make it a lot easier to jump into a new environment with both feet, secure in those old relationships and knowing that, in time, new relationships will form.
This summer, I packed up a household of children, pets and things and followed my SO out to Germany. It's an adventure and a great opportunity for the kids to see Europe, now that they're old enough to remember it. But there are challenges involved in moving them away from their familiar places and people. Reading Third Culture Kids has been useful in helping me to prepare the kids for the experience.
Some of the things that stood out was the reminder that no matter how difficult the adjustment, there will be a time, a few months down the road, when everyday activities are routine. I remind myself of that daily. He also emphasized the importance of leaving the previous place with good-byes said, parties attended and any conflicts resolved before you leave. Knowing that people care about you and will miss you does make it a lot easier to jump into a new environment with both feet, secure in those old relationships and knowing that, in time, new relationships will form.
theseasoul's review
challenging
hopeful
informative
inspiring
slow-paced
3.5
|| 3.5 ⭐️ ||
An excellent resource for TCKs, MKs and those who love & support them. Through the very thorough research put together in this book, I was able to understand the roots of some of my feelings, behaviours and coping strategies that often arise from growing up in a different culture. It offers plenty of tools for transition to and from cultures, and is also helpful in processing grief as an adult TCK.
I enjoyed reading the stories of other TCKs sprinkled throughout the book; it really broadened my perspective on the many diverse shapes a TCK’s life can take.
It did become a little tedious some of the time, especially with a few longer sections that I felt didn’t apply to me as much.
skita's review
5.0
Still actually finishing this book after reading it in chunks for 3 years. Why is it taking so long? Because reading it gives me the very intense experience of someone explaining some of the most intricate pieces of myself to myself. A must read for ATCKs like myself and for TCKs (and their parents) as I wish I and my parents had read this before and during my growing up abroad years.
sonjaloviisa's review against another edition
4.0
Wow...
As an ATCK who grew up between California and Finland, I can relate to so much of what’s written on these pages. I hadn’t heard of the term TCK before 2017, and realizing that such a concept even exists brought me so much comfort. Reading through this has helped me work through so many questions relating to my identity and I’ve began to understand myself and my actions a lot better. This book definitely opened a window for me!
I’m deducting one star because this was really slow at times. The text is often just downright boring, with the excerpts from other TCKs being the best part. But I understand that talking about theory isn’t always exciting.
As an ATCK who grew up between California and Finland, I can relate to so much of what’s written on these pages. I hadn’t heard of the term TCK before 2017, and realizing that such a concept even exists brought me so much comfort. Reading through this has helped me work through so many questions relating to my identity and I’ve began to understand myself and my actions a lot better. This book definitely opened a window for me!
I’m deducting one star because this was really slow at times. The text is often just downright boring, with the excerpts from other TCKs being the best part. But I understand that talking about theory isn’t always exciting.
nk92hp's review
3.0
It validated a lot of the experiences I had, but the book was way longer than it should have been. This could easily have been condensed even with all the anecdotes, made some parts really dry to read and had a lot of repetition of ideas.
jnieto's review against another edition
4.0
A must read for people living cross-cultural life or parents of children across borders. Contains many things you suspected but were fully aware of.
megpsmit's review against another edition
4.0
I have skimmed this book before this year but I finally sat down and gave it a good read this year. It is often referred to as the "bible" of TCK care and is a very thorough book. I love the practical stories that they have of the different TCKs that they have encountered as well as the research that has been done. I think this newer edition is worth reading if you have only read the older one. The updates are excellent. I did find this book to be much too long though to find myself recommending to families on the field, it is quite a reading commitment.
elisteixner's review
informative
slow-paced
3.25
therapy is expensive, stealing this book from your mums bookshelf and crying when it explains why you have abandonment issues is free