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james1star's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
5.0
Ummm… perfection. Like wow I was so hooked and invested, it was soo good. We follow our protagonist Ludwik who is writing a second person account to a summertime lover, Janusz set in 1980’s socialist Poland. I don’t want to explain any more but there’s obviously lots of stuff that happen and other characters and yhh - read it to know more. My only issue was in the middle there was maybe a little too much of a political storyline that I wasn’t expecting or in want of but it didn’t ruin it and the ending just gripped every part of me.
The plot I was here for but oh my the characters. I loved them, well Ludwik mainly but like ughh I needed good things to come his way. Also the writing and world building is exceptional, it’s so transportive, rich and vivid with detailed descriptions of places, people and scenes. For the first time I actually used a pencil to underline points that stood out to me and I have quotes and passages saved from nearly every page - it was soooo good. Let me share some:
‘And yet, it occurs to me now that we can never run with our lies indefinitely. Sooner or later we are forced to confront their darkness. We can choose the when, not the if. And the longer we wait, the more painful and uncertain it will be.‘
‘…we had no manual, no one to show us the way. Not one example of a happy couple made up of boys. How were we supposed to know what to do? Did we even believe that we deserve to get away with happiness?‘
‘Some things cannot be erased through silence. Some people have that power over you, whether you like it or not... Some people, some events, make you lose your head. They’re like guillotines, cutting your life in two, the dead and alive, the before and after.’
‘Shame, heavy and alive, had materialised, built from buried fears and desires.’
‘ I had always liked the act of leaving, the expanse between departure and arrival when you’re seemingly nowhere, defined by another kind of time.’
‘I had never seen you before - not consciously, anyway. Yet my mind felt strangely relieved, as if it had recognised someone.’
And I have so many more, exceptional wording with so much meaning in Jedrowski’s prose.
There was also so much realness to the story and characters. As a queer person, there will be so many things that speak to the heart of your psyche as Ludwik examines many things in his life like internalised homophobia, feeling othered from those around us even if nothing has happened yet, having thoughts and desires turn straight to shame, different timelines of experiences, this idea of ‘no manual’ or even if we are deserving of freedom, a life where we can just be. Not to get soppy or anything but it speaks to you and these connections are universal and timeless (for now anyway) - likeness can be drawn and it means so much.
I could talk about this book forever but Yhh please read it. It’s so good!!
The plot I was here for but oh my the characters. I loved them, well Ludwik mainly but like ughh I needed good things to come his way. Also the writing and world building is exceptional, it’s so transportive, rich and vivid with detailed descriptions of places, people and scenes. For the first time I actually used a pencil to underline points that stood out to me and I have quotes and passages saved from nearly every page - it was soooo good. Let me share some:
‘And yet, it occurs to me now that we can never run with our lies indefinitely. Sooner or later we are forced to confront their darkness. We can choose the when, not the if. And the longer we wait, the more painful and uncertain it will be.‘
‘…we had no manual, no one to show us the way. Not one example of a happy couple made up of boys. How were we supposed to know what to do? Did we even believe that we deserve to get away with happiness?‘
‘Some things cannot be erased through silence. Some people have that power over you, whether you like it or not... Some people, some events, make you lose your head. They’re like guillotines, cutting your life in two, the dead and alive, the before and after.’
‘Shame, heavy and alive, had materialised, built from buried fears and desires.’
‘ I had always liked the act of leaving, the expanse between departure and arrival when you’re seemingly nowhere, defined by another kind of time.’
‘I had never seen you before - not consciously, anyway. Yet my mind felt strangely relieved, as if it had recognised someone.’
And I have so many more, exceptional wording with so much meaning in Jedrowski’s prose.
There was also so much realness to the story and characters. As a queer person, there will be so many things that speak to the heart of your psyche as Ludwik examines many things in his life like internalised homophobia, feeling othered from those around us even if nothing has happened yet, having thoughts and desires turn straight to shame, different timelines of experiences, this idea of ‘no manual’ or even if we are deserving of freedom, a life where we can just be. Not to get soppy or anything but it speaks to you and these connections are universal and timeless (for now anyway) - likeness can be drawn and it means so much.
I could talk about this book forever but Yhh please read it. It’s so good!!
Content Warnings
Graphic: Sexual content
Moderate: Homophobia
Minor: Grief, Mental illness, Alcoholism, Death, Police brutality, Suicidal thoughts, Antisemitism, Drug use, and Misogyny
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