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informative
fast-paced
On Goodreads, 3 stars is "good" l, and I think that is where I feel comfortable placing this at.
I came to this book already a fan of their podcast, and wanted to support them, and was interested in seeing how their style translated to book form.
I think one of the best things from this book is that Sarah and Kayla were able to make use of diverse voices from their community in each section of the book. I loved hearing the direct words from people with differing experiences.
I will give some caveats about the book, as there are some polarized opinions amongst my fellow reviews. Do I still recommend the book? yes. Do I think it's the best book for all people? No
-The authors make a point that this book isn't meant to be an Ace101 book; their focus is mainly upon how the lenses of their sexualities and romantic orientations influence their view of different aspects of their lives. I think they do a good job at pointing to other books for people to see other perspectives
-I definitely think this book is best in audio form, and if you can't stand listening to their collaborative style in the early episodes of their podcast, this is not the book for you. I can't comment on the print version, but I can understand how the style of their narration may not translate the best to print.
-There are times where I feel like aromanticism doesn't get covered as extensively. I think some male asexual quotes in the gender section would have been useful, and wish this book talked more about neurodivergency and asexuality/aromanticism. However, I can understand trying to condense their wide breadth of covered topics into a small book could be difficult.
-Most of the negative reviews tend to focus in on a passage about media in the closing of the book, specifically around coming back to old media with negative tropes being more apparent upon looking back with an aspec lense. They make reference to JKR and Harry Potter here, basically saying that JKR's books were inspiring to many (at an earlier point) but that her transphobic views recently have greatly undermined that.
I do think that a bit more care should have been put into this section's wording, and perhaps exploring more of a personal angle on this topic would have helped the point Sarah was making. I do not think that it is a curious/genuine mindset to read in malice into these words.
All in all, this book is a streamlined primer into looking how the aspec lense affects different areas of life, but this book I think should be held in conversation with other more research heavy books and the wider amounts of topics present in the parent podcast
I came to this book already a fan of their podcast, and wanted to support them, and was interested in seeing how their style translated to book form.
I think one of the best things from this book is that Sarah and Kayla were able to make use of diverse voices from their community in each section of the book. I loved hearing the direct words from people with differing experiences.
I will give some caveats about the book, as there are some polarized opinions amongst my fellow reviews. Do I still recommend the book? yes. Do I think it's the best book for all people? No
-The authors make a point that this book isn't meant to be an Ace101 book; their focus is mainly upon how the lenses of their sexualities and romantic orientations influence their view of different aspects of their lives. I think they do a good job at pointing to other books for people to see other perspectives
-I definitely think this book is best in audio form, and if you can't stand listening to their collaborative style in the early episodes of their podcast, this is not the book for you. I can't comment on the print version, but I can understand how the style of their narration may not translate the best to print.
-There are times where I feel like aromanticism doesn't get covered as extensively. I think some male asexual quotes in the gender section would have been useful, and wish this book talked more about neurodivergency and asexuality/aromanticism. However, I can understand trying to condense their wide breadth of covered topics into a small book could be difficult.
-Most of the negative reviews tend to focus in on a passage about media in the closing of the book, specifically around coming back to old media with negative tropes being more apparent upon looking back with an aspec lense. They make reference to JKR and Harry Potter here, basically saying that JKR's books were inspiring to many (at an earlier point) but that her transphobic views recently have greatly undermined that.
I do think that a bit more care should have been put into this section's wording, and perhaps exploring more of a personal angle on this topic would have helped the point Sarah was making. I do not think that it is a curious/genuine mindset to read in malice into these words.
All in all, this book is a streamlined primer into looking how the aspec lense affects different areas of life, but this book I think should be held in conversation with other more research heavy books and the wider amounts of topics present in the parent podcast
emotional
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
funny
hopeful
informative
inspiring
lighthearted
reflective
relaxing
medium-paced
The book isn't really bad, but I don't exactly recommend it either. I think the optimal audience is maybe someone with some preexisting understanding of aspec identity, but not broader queer identity, and looking to learn more or help themselves along. The book is rather brief and not particularly in depth. A large portion consists of quotes from survey responses from different aspec people. To be brutally honest it felt like they didn't have a ton to say and padded it out a little, and then on only page 132 said they didn't want to go on forever so they're wrapping it up. The writing wasn't bad but wasn't great. I felt like the purple colored glasses metaphor seemed a bit overused, both in terms of how often it was used and in its application. A lot of what they attribute to an aspec lens is really more to do with any queer lens. I have a few other nitpicks, like suggesting other queer realizations always involve other people which is not actually true, such as for trans people, but it's not worth getting into. The book is fine, it's a quick read, I'm sure for some people it'll be very useful, I did not feel I learned much as an aspec trans woman who's already pretty aware of queer theory.
As for the claims of transphobia in other reviews, I was concerned to hear them but personally I found the claims overblown. There's a paragraph right at the end saying JK Rowling's views on gender don't take away from the joy some people got out of her work, and I don't personally find that particularly objectionable. I don't think you should support JKR's work at all anymore given her views and behavior, but it's not wrong to say some people connected with it. I just didn't think the book went out of line, it seems pretty uncharitable to call the book transphobic, but I can only speak for myself.
As for the claims of transphobia in other reviews, I was concerned to hear them but personally I found the claims overblown. There's a paragraph right at the end saying JK Rowling's views on gender don't take away from the joy some people got out of her work, and I don't personally find that particularly objectionable. I don't think you should support JKR's work at all anymore given her views and behavior, but it's not wrong to say some people connected with it. I just didn't think the book went out of line, it seems pretty uncharitable to call the book transphobic, but I can only speak for myself.
informative
reflective
A combined pro/con: there was really great representation across the entire ace spectrum, but it was tough at times to feel a constant narrative flow as there were just so many quotes from surveyed individuals. The "aspec glasses" metaphor also felt like a hammer to the head at times, it was kind of overused
Content Warnings
Moderate: Acephobia/Arophobia
emotional
funny
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
informative
reflective
medium-paced
informative
lighthearted
reflective
fast-paced
I'm so grateful to the publisher for supporting this wave of books on ace/aro identities and I have also enjoyed episodes of the podcast by the authors before. Still, this book wasn't at all what I was hoping for. Who is the audience for this? It is simultaneously too general and too specific, as it skips over the most important and interesting aspects (like the split attraction model) that would make it easier to understand the gist of the topic. Quite often they would say "we could write so much about this but we won't" - why? The book is super short, a little more depth wouldn't even have led to a large/challenging book. Instead, they include half a page on why not abandoning Harry Potter as a fandom is valid, despite criticism of JKR. I would have loved some actual recommendations in the media section, instead of this defence of JKR out of left field (by two cis people). Overall, this skimmed the surface of many topics and taught me more about the authors than about asexuality and aromanticism. I appreciate the effort, but the podcast is probably the better medium for their style of storytelling.
informative
inspiring
relaxing
fast-paced
I've known I was ace for about 10 years now, but hearing different perspectives through this book was really enlightening. As well I love how the audiobook is done, it feels like a conversation or podcast making for an easy listen.