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emeryyy's review
challenging
emotional
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
sad
medium-paced
5.0
i’d like to preface this by saying that my rating is not of the story itself, because
1) it’s not something i usually read, and
2) i dislike rating something so brutally honest, vulnerable, and personal.
instead, it’s of how the story was written and told
i don’t usually read memoirs. not because i don’t like them; i just generally prefer other books. but this synopsis - immigrant family, medical malpractice, impossible beauty standards - caught my attention. it’s a very moving story that addresses fatphobia, the targeting of immigrants and people of color in the medical field, intergenerational trauma and healing, and so much more. the author describes the impact her mother’s death had not just on her but her entire family. she details all the questions she was left with - questions her family wouldn’t, or couldn’t, answer. i appreciated the way the memoir was broken down into six parts, for the six tones in Vietnamese: ma (ghost), mả (tomb), mà (but), má (mother), mạ (newborn rice seedling), and mã (horse)
thank you to BookishFirst and Celadon Books for the arc!
1) it’s not something i usually read, and
2) i dislike rating something so brutally honest, vulnerable, and personal.
instead, it’s of how the story was written and told
i don’t usually read memoirs. not because i don’t like them; i just generally prefer other books. but this synopsis - immigrant family, medical malpractice, impossible beauty standards - caught my attention. it’s a very moving story that addresses fatphobia, the targeting of immigrants and people of color in the medical field, intergenerational trauma and healing, and so much more. the author describes the impact her mother’s death had not just on her but her entire family. she details all the questions she was left with - questions her family wouldn’t, or couldn’t, answer. i appreciated the way the memoir was broken down into six parts, for the six tones in Vietnamese: ma (ghost), mả (tomb), mà (but), má (mother), mạ (newborn rice seedling), and mã (horse)
thank you to BookishFirst and Celadon Books for the arc!
Content Warnings
Graphic: Grief, Body shaming, Fatphobia, and Death of parent
mondovertigo's review
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
4.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Medical trauma, Body shaming, Death of parent, and Grief
Moderate: Racism and Pregnancy
Minor: Racial slurs
okiecozyreader's review
emotional
reflective
medium-paced
4.25
I really enjoyed this memoir from a daughter of a Vietnamese immigrant who owned a nail salon. Her mother died young during plastic surgery and she spent a lot of her young years working on figuring herself out. She attended an Ivy League school, participated in a cult (disguised as a yoga, self-help program), and returned to Vietnam to know her family and her mother better.
“How could I become a mother if I never knew my own?” Vengeance
“I wanted to belong, I had to obey Má, which meant I had to abandon my own inner knowing.” Squid and Chives
“Don’t work so hard. We get to experience life on earth because of the heavens. When you live a life always resisting, life becomes a struggle,…” Packing
“I became so obsessed with the past that I kept everyone else frozen in time too. I became attached to old stories of how we’d hurt one another and didn’t allow my family to change even when they did.” Part 6, persimmons
“My name is Susan Liễu. I come from a line of courageous nail salon workers who are my heroes. Má was a manicurist, and Ba was a manicurist too. I am the manicurists’ daughter and, this is just the beginning.”
“How could I become a mother if I never knew my own?” Vengeance
“I wanted to belong, I had to obey Má, which meant I had to abandon my own inner knowing.” Squid and Chives
“Don’t work so hard. We get to experience life on earth because of the heavens. When you live a life always resisting, life becomes a struggle,…” Packing
“I became so obsessed with the past that I kept everyone else frozen in time too. I became attached to old stories of how we’d hurt one another and didn’t allow my family to change even when they did.” Part 6, persimmons
“My name is Susan Liễu. I come from a line of courageous nail salon workers who are my heroes. Má was a manicurist, and Ba was a manicurist too. I am the manicurists’ daughter and, this is just the beginning.”
Content Warnings
Graphic: Medical trauma, Pregnancy, Death of parent, and Grief
m_a_j's review
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
3.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death of parent, Body shaming, and Fatphobia
Moderate: Medical trauma, Medical content, and Grief
Minor: Panic attacks/disorders, Pregnancy, and Vomit
katiemcgregor's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
4.0
I’m not a memoir reader — as in I can’t remember the last time I read one (or if I ever have). But I’m realizing this may be a facet of my reading tastes that I’ve never afforded a fair chance.
Lieu is a natural story teller. So natural that I had to look it up several times to confirm that this is, in fact, her debut book. Now I’m afraid that she’s set a standard so high that the next memoir I pick up will be disappointing by comparison.
The scenes Lieu crafts are vivid and we move through them in such a snappy and efficient way that there’s always something to think about. She does a phenomenal job of fleshing out events, emotions, and interactions and giving them space to exist without dwelling on them to the detriment of pacing.
Lieu is a person so extremely different from myself which, I think, made The Manicurist’s Daughter all the more interesting to read. I would very much recommend this to those who already love memoirs and those wanting to get into them.
Lieu is a natural story teller. So natural that I had to look it up several times to confirm that this is, in fact, her debut book. Now I’m afraid that she’s set a standard so high that the next memoir I pick up will be disappointing by comparison.
The scenes Lieu crafts are vivid and we move through them in such a snappy and efficient way that there’s always something to think about. She does a phenomenal job of fleshing out events, emotions, and interactions and giving them space to exist without dwelling on them to the detriment of pacing.
Lieu is a person so extremely different from myself which, I think, made The Manicurist’s Daughter all the more interesting to read. I would very much recommend this to those who already love memoirs and those wanting to get into them.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death of parent, Fatphobia, Medical trauma, and Body shaming
torturedreadersdept's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
funny
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
sad
medium-paced
5.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Cultural appropriation, Death, Fatphobia, Dysphoria, Body shaming, Bullying, Death of parent, Gaslighting, Grief, Injury/Injury detail, Pregnancy, Racial slurs, Medical trauma, Medical content, Mental illness, Murder, and Racism
Moderate: Emotional abuse
Minor: Pandemic/Epidemic and Pregnancy
bibliomich's review against another edition
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
slow-paced
Out of respect for authors' personal stories, I prefer not to provide star ratings for memoirs.
Susan Lieu is the self-proclaimed keeper of her family's story--the one who has tasked herself with preserving the memories of her siblings, her father, and in particular, her mother who passed away during cosmetic surgery due to medical malpractice when Susan was only 11 years old. The telling of this story proves to be a lofty task, as Susan runs into many roadblocks along the way, including reluctant family members who would prefer not to talk about any of it, in addition to facing her own trauma.
While there were many elements of this story that I found to be incredibly compelling, overall I found the memoir to be uneven, specifically when it came to pacing and tone. There were times when the author would spend whole paragraphs detailing a single meal, but then she would blow right past an event that seemed to me (as a reader) like it would hold much more significance. Of course, who am I to judge what an author finds significant in her own story?
Much of the story was heavy. It felt as though this book was a form of therapy for Susan, as she worked through the loss of her mother, as well as toxicity within her family. Susan also tried to inject moments of humor into her story. Many of these fell flat for me, either seeming overly cynical or dismissive. I would have loved to see Susan explore some of her themes a little more deeply: the generational body shaming within her family that haunted her well into adulthood (and may have contributed to her mother's decision to have surgery), her parents' early struggles as Vietnamese refugees and the impact this had on the way they raised her and her siblings, or her decision to use performance art as a way to heal. These were some of the strongest points in the book that were ultimately overshadowed by vignettes that felt less connected to her story.
Thank you to NetGalley for my advanced listener copy.
Susan Lieu is the self-proclaimed keeper of her family's story--the one who has tasked herself with preserving the memories of her siblings, her father, and in particular, her mother who passed away during cosmetic surgery due to medical malpractice when Susan was only 11 years old. The telling of this story proves to be a lofty task, as Susan runs into many roadblocks along the way, including reluctant family members who would prefer not to talk about any of it, in addition to facing her own trauma.
While there were many elements of this story that I found to be incredibly compelling, overall I found the memoir to be uneven, specifically when it came to pacing and tone. There were times when the author would spend whole paragraphs detailing a single meal, but then she would blow right past an event that seemed to me (as a reader) like it would hold much more significance. Of course, who am I to judge what an author finds significant in her own story?
Much of the story was heavy. It felt as though this book was a form of therapy for Susan, as she worked through the loss of her mother, as well as toxicity within her family. Susan also tried to inject moments of humor into her story. Many of these fell flat for me, either seeming overly cynical or dismissive. I would have loved to see Susan explore some of her themes a little more deeply: the generational body shaming within her family that haunted her well into adulthood (and may have contributed to her mother's decision to have surgery), her parents' early struggles as Vietnamese refugees and the impact this had on the way they raised her and her siblings, or her decision to use performance art as a way to heal. These were some of the strongest points in the book that were ultimately overshadowed by vignettes that felt less connected to her story.
Thank you to NetGalley for my advanced listener copy.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Fatphobia, Body shaming, Death of parent, and Grief
Moderate: Eating disorder, Medical trauma, Medical content, Death, and Emotional abuse
Minor: War and Panic attacks/disorders
allapaz's review
4.0
At its heart, this memoir is a celebration of the author's mother, who passed away after a botched plastic surgery when the author was very young. This is pitched as an investigation into the details behind her unnecessary death, but is so much more--this is a story about an immigrant, refugee family with big dreams, an incredible work ethic, and a strong sense of spirituality and connection. I learned a TON from this memoir, and I appreciate the author's vulnerability and meticulous research into her own family history.
My only issue here was due to organization, I think. I found that at times this felt like two memoirs--one family history, and one personal exploration. Arguably those things are always linked, and the author does tie anecdotes back to each other in meaningful ways to make those connections clear, but for every beautifully-woven marriage of family and personal growth and discovery there's an equally confusing story that feels tangential or shoehorned in. Don't get me wrong, it's all interesting, I just feel like there this probably could have been 100 pages shorter and still packed the punch it did. This took me on a journey and taught me a lot, but I got fatigued by the 'side quests' along the way.
All in all, if you love a story of refugee families and their growth and love and relationships, this is for you. If you love mouthwatering descriptions of Vietnamese foods, this is for you. If you love a strong yet complicated mother-daughter relationship that transverses time and space and life and death, this is for you.
I will note, I feel like this would be a great read in audiobook format. There is so much Vietnamese in here that I wish my 'mind voice' could pronounce while I was reading, but since I couldn't I missed that layer of the writing. I could see myself re-reading this in audio format in the future solely for the impact of hearing what the language adds to the telling of the story.
Thanks so much to BookishFirst for the ARC! All opinions are my own.
My only issue here was due to organization, I think. I found that at times this felt like two memoirs--one family history, and one personal exploration. Arguably those things are always linked, and the author does tie anecdotes back to each other in meaningful ways to make those connections clear, but for every beautifully-woven marriage of family and personal growth and discovery there's an equally confusing story that feels tangential or shoehorned in. Don't get me wrong, it's all interesting, I just feel like there this probably could have been 100 pages shorter and still packed the punch it did. This took me on a journey and taught me a lot, but I got fatigued by the 'side quests' along the way.
All in all, if you love a story of refugee families and their growth and love and relationships, this is for you. If you love mouthwatering descriptions of Vietnamese foods, this is for you. If you love a strong yet complicated mother-daughter relationship that transverses time and space and life and death, this is for you.
I will note, I feel like this would be a great read in audiobook format. There is so much Vietnamese in here that I wish my 'mind voice' could pronounce while I was reading, but since I couldn't I missed that layer of the writing. I could see myself re-reading this in audio format in the future solely for the impact of hearing what the language adds to the telling of the story.
Thanks so much to BookishFirst for the ARC! All opinions are my own.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death of parent
The author speaks very openly about talking to her mother while she was in a coma, and how her mother looked (physically) while on life support. As someone who has seen a loved one through hospice care, the descriptions brought back a lot about that time, so just be aware. <3care__'s review
emotional
funny
hopeful
informative
reflective
medium-paced
4.0
The Manicurist’s Daughter is a raw and evocative memoir about grief, intergenerational trauma, family, language, culture, food, body image, spirituality and self-discovery. In this book, Susan Lieu details her experiences of growing up as child of Vietnamese refugees who fled Vietnam in the 1980s to build a new life in America, no matter what the odds. Through their parents’ blood, sweat and tears, they established Susan’s Nails, a nail salon in California, which eventually expanded to a second location. However at age 11, they lost their mother when she died during a tummy tuck procedure.
It’s a devastating yet inspiring read. As someone who grew up in an Asian household, it is very easy to relate to Lieu’s stories.
“I was not taught to listen to my body, I was taught to listen to my elders.”
The unexpected loss of their mother left her with unanswered questions that no one in her family was willing (or ready) to address. Her father, in particular, consistently dismissed her questions.
“Even on her death anniversary, when we huddled around her grave offering her foods, talking about her was off-limits.”
“Even on her death anniversary, when we huddled around her grave offering her foods, talking about her was off-limits.”
For two decades, she looked for answers. She went back to Vietnam to explore her roots and had a goal in mind to know who her Má really was as a sister, a daughter and as a person through the eyes of her relatives.
“How could I become a mother if I never knew my own?”
As Asians, we feel most loved through the food our parents and grandparents serve and prepare for us. We are conditioned to just obey whatever the elders in our family say and never attempt to talk back, even if they start voicing out unsolicited remarks about our bodies, which to them is just their way of expressing concern and affection.
“The center of my universe was governed by Má. As much as she was thrilling, she was terrorizing. She made up all the rules and everything would be fine as long as I never pissed her off. And so, gradually, this became my truth; my relationship to food was really about my relationship to family.”
This entire reading experience became more meaningful to me as it reminded me of how fortunate I am to still have precious time to spend with my parents. Also, this book led me to discover how memoirs that touches on Asian culture and traditions has become my favorite subgenre in books.
“If I really wanted to break the cycle of intergenerational trauma, I had to walk into the fire. It was time I stood up for myself.”
Big thanks to Celadon Books and Netgalley for the Digital Review Copy but most importantly, thank you to Susan Lieu for sharing your most vulnerable self to the world and showing us that the journey towards inner peace and forgiveness is both attainable and transformative.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Body shaming, War, Grief, Misogyny, Death of parent, and Medical trauma
monolid_library's review
emotional
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
5.0
Content Warnings
Moderate: Death of parent and Bullying