Reviews tagging 'Domestic abuse'

W domu snów by Carmen Maria Machado

1469 reviews

smm122132's review against another edition

emotional reflective sad medium-paced

5.0

So beautifully written.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Domestic abuse and Physical abuse

Moderate: Fatphobia

freedomofchoys's review against another edition

dark emotional sad tense fast-paced

5.0

This is one of my favorite books I've ever read. The writing is poetic, haunting and incredibly innovative. I found the short, vignette style chapters engrossing and the way the story was presented incredibly beautiful and immersive. This book was a haunting and beautiful portrayal of a queer, abusive relationship but shows the more subtle side of domestic abuse and does a great job of showing the trauma that comes from emotional, psychological abuse that is not as often portrayed in media. Carmen did a lot of research into domestic abuse, especially abuse in queer relationships and it was not only entertaining, but also informative. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Domestic abuse

kadoatie's review against another edition

3.75

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Domestic abuse, Biphobia, Body shaming, and Gaslighting

Moderate: Fatphobia

lpogo16's review against another edition

dark emotional hopeful reflective sad medium-paced

5.0

Machado had a lot of courage in talking about her story and a lot of heart in telling the story of other queer women. This book really opened my eyes to a topic I never thought to look at head on. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Infidelity, Mental illness, Bullying, Sexual content, Emotional abuse, Gaslighting, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Sexual violence, Toxic relationship, Violence, Rape, Sexual harassment, Alcohol, and Domestic abuse

Moderate: Fatphobia, Homophobia, Murder, Violence, Child abuse, Body shaming, Drug abuse, and Drug use

Minor: Vomit, Dementia, Blood, Cursing, and Confinement

The vibe of this book is really sad. The energy is very depressing though it does take a hopefully turn at the end.

alloftaysreads's review against another edition

dark emotional sad fast-paced

4.5

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Gaslighting, Domestic abuse, Cursing, Sexual content, Toxic relationship, and Emotional abuse

Moderate: Sexual violence, Religious bigotry, Domestic abuse, Toxic relationship, Lesbophobia, Homophobia, Emotional abuse, and Sexual assault

Minor: Adult/minor relationship

erdbeermus's review against another edition

dark emotional informative inspiring reflective sad fast-paced

5.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Domestic abuse

jashanac's review against another edition

4.5

Well. I read this in one sitting, which is not something I do often at ALL, and one of the only other times I have done so was reading Bad Romance by Heather Demetrios which is also a story of an abusive relationship. This is an experience I have unfortunately had in my own life, and I am always so hesitant/nervous to pick these types of books up, because I know I will cry at some point and be thrown back into the past, but I also clearly DEVOUR them due to how seen and validated I feel upon reading them. 

I'm a bisexual woman but who has not ever been in a relationship with a woman and my own experience of abuse was with a man, so obviously the thematic elements discussing queerness and abuse in queer relationships and especially abuse in relationships between women, is not something I can relate to -- but while everyone who experiences abuse experiences it differently, there is so much about it that is familiar. 

The structure of this memoir is definitely unique and will not be to everyone's taste. It wasn't even exactly to my taste all of the time, but any dislike I ever felt for the structure was overshadowed by the moments that struck me to my core. The scene where Machado describes

being screamed at and chased around the house by her ex, and locking herself in the bathroom while her abuser tries breaking the door down... only to come out later still crying and shaking to have her abuser say, "What's wrong? Why do you look so upset?"

made me start crying immediately. It's such a succinct way to explain the absolute mindfuckery of emotional and mental abuse -- let me terrify you and torment you and make you fearful for your safety... only to ask you why you're so upset. It makes you feel like you're living in an alternate reality Twilight Zone. 

I did feel like there were several sections that felt a bit like "fluff" that I didn't personally think added to the thematic elements enough and that were not really adding to the "here is what abuse can look like and feel like" story being told either. That and the structure not always working for me are the reasons it's not a solid 5 stars for me. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Emotional abuse and Domestic abuse

Moderate: Homophobia and Lesbophobia

rheawhea's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional informative sad tense medium-paced

5.0

Carmen Maria Machado's In the Dream House is elusive and defiant in so many ways. Packaged as "memoir" yet it clearly chucks the idea of it solely as one when it sits in a genre limbo. Machado researches and comes up against evidence of queer domestic abuse similar to her own experience yet the world still gets confused, and at times even downright refuses, the idea of a woman inflicting abuse on their partner, another woman. I, myself, marvel at all the feelings this book has evoked in me--stomach churning fear, relief, confusion, surprise, confusion again, bewilderment, not wanting to read on but simultaneously not wanting to flinch and unable to look away. Despite the stew of confusion and seeming half-formed understanding, it was clear very early on that this book is a 5 star, that Machado is a brilliant writer, and that I will not be able to not think about this book for a long time. Also, that I will reread this one day. It's like the thrill of reading horror or watching it and its effects after it's over, the inescapable haunting: what will I see/imagine/hear/dream up once I close my eyes?

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Domestic abuse

klsreads's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional reflective sad tense medium-paced

5.0

In the Dream House is a masterpiece. Told in vignettes structured around literature tropes, this memoir follows the rise and fall of a profoundly abusive relationship. Machado is brave, vulnerable, and unflinchingly honest as she exposes the abuse she suffered across a 2 year relationship with another woman. She asks: if we view queer relationships as utopia divorced from patriarchy and hierarchy, are we being homophobic? Are lesbians not humans - complex, hurting, and capable of inflicting extreme harm? If we flatten a group of people into a monolith, we dehumanize them. This book is a necessary addition to the growing work on the incidence of abuse in queer relationships.

I've never read anything quite like this - I loved the vignette narrative structure. The book moved quickly because most sections were short. A couple of the tropes dragged on for me/didn't hit 100%, but I was enthralled and could hardly put it down. A few standouts for me - "Dream House as Deja Vu" (x3), "Dream House as Queer Villainy" (!!!), "Dream House as Bluebeard", "Dream House as the River Lethe", "Dream House as Choose Your Own Adventure" ...... ok, I have to stop or I'm going to quote half of this work.

Even more wild: I was in Iowa City as an undergrad during the events of this book. Did I see Carmen and the Woman from the Dream House at a coffee shop, at Obama's speech, in a bookstore? It makes me shiver, the ways people suffer out of view.

Brilliant. Carmen Maria Machado is an absolute force and a genius of prose and innovative structure. I HIGHLY recommend this book, but mind the CW's. Machado doesn't shy away from the gore at the heart of her story. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Domestic abuse, Drug use, Gaslighting, Homophobia, Panic attacks/disorders, Toxic relationship, Grief, Racism, Suicidal thoughts, Lesbophobia, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Sexual assault, Sexual harassment, Vomit, Self harm, Sexism, Sexual violence, Blood, Violence, Fatphobia, Infidelity, Abandonment, Alcohol, Bullying, Confinement, Cursing, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Rape, and Sexual content

Moderate: Biphobia, Car accident, Adult/minor relationship, and Injury/Injury detail

Minor: Animal death, Cancer, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , and Gun violence

ellornaslibrary's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional hopeful informative reflective sad medium-paced

5.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Toxic friendship, Physical abuse, Domestic abuse, Grief, Emotional abuse, Toxic relationship, Suicidal thoughts, Gaslighting, Alcoholism, Sexual content, Sexual violence, and Panic attacks/disorders

Moderate: Injury/Injury detail and Infidelity

Minor: Death and Fire/Fire injury