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evelinavilhelmsson's review against another edition
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.5
cruzsuzanne's review against another edition
3.0
I appreciate the overall theme/concept and the effort to delve into important topics but I think the author could have explained them with more depth. There are many meaningful and insightful parts but also some that I disagree with. There are even takes that I find really problematic. Aside from these, the book can be a bit cheesy at times, making me cringe and/or roll my eyes. The characters aren't that interesting or engaging either and their story is lacking in fun and humor (both of which I believe are essential components of love). It also doesn't help that their story is shared as if it's a case study. Last but definitely not the least, the writing is just so detached.
I can see why this is loved by many but it's just not for me.
P.S. I am so NOT a big fan of marriage as an institution. Lol
I can see why this is loved by many but it's just not for me.
P.S. I am so NOT a big fan of marriage as an institution. Lol
literarycrushes's review against another edition
5.0
I thought this novel was excellent. It reads as part documentary, part self-help book. It had an overarching cinematic tone to it, in the vein of decades-spanning films like Life Itself or When Harry Met Sally. It was a unique retelling of a romance, starting in infancy (the story is mainly tole through the man – Rabih’s – viewpoint but the reader also gets a portrait of Kirsten) and spanning through middle age. The novel makes the point that while contemporary romance stories usually conclude with a ‘happy ending’ after the couple getting engaged, married, or overcomes some major roadblock, love is not so easily tied up into a neat little bow after the final chapter. To fall in love is easy, de Botton claims. To stay in a happy and functional relationship over the course of many, many years (and obstacles, both major and minor) with your beloved is not so easy. Without ever sounding cynical or preachy, The Course of Love is a poetic antidote to what we’re told love is by Hollywood films and more commercial romance novels.
*I’d originally added The Course of Love by Alain de Botton to my TBR after watching something online about how it was one of Harry Style’s favorite books. I’d read other books by de Botton (The Art of Travel) before and had been a longtime fan of his ‘emotional education’ venture, The School of Life.
*I’d originally added The Course of Love by Alain de Botton to my TBR after watching something online about how it was one of Harry Style’s favorite books. I’d read other books by de Botton (The Art of Travel) before and had been a longtime fan of his ‘emotional education’ venture, The School of Life.
shareen17's review against another edition
4.0
This is a novel that very thoughtfully relates the course of a marriage and why people react to circumstances and behave in their relationships as they do. I rarely bother with underlining favorite passages, but must have underlined at least 20 in this book - and could have underlined many more. I didn't share all the author's thoughts and opinions, but loved much of it. "A person has to feel rather safe around someone else in order to be this difficult." "No one can hope to be strong enough to negotiate the thick tangles of existence, they maintain, without having once enjoyed a sense of mattering limitlessly and inordinately to one or two adults." "Without patience for negotiation, there is bitterness: anger that forgot where it came from." I could keep quoting for pages.
wanderingmole's review against another edition
5.0
I estimate to have highlighted 30% of this book and to have reread as much of it out loud to whoever was in the vicinity at the time. I really enjoy this style of de Botton reflective commentary on his fictional characters’ relationships. I think this quote sums up what the book sought to achieve, and in my mind, did:
p 215: “By the standards of most love stories, our own, real relationships are almost all damaged and unsatisfactory… But we should be careful not to judge our relationships by the expectations imposed on us by a frequently misleading aesthetic medium. The fault lies with art, not life. Rather than split up, we may need to tell ourselves more accurate stories - stories that don’t dwell so much on the beginning, that don’t promise us complete understanding, that strive to normalise our troubles and show us a melancholy yet hopeful path through the course of love.”
One could argue that a gap in the book is that it doesn’t deal with when people *should* leave unhealthy and harmful relationships, but I can see how that may have been outside the scope of what this book sought to achieve. This is a book that paints a more forgiving picture of what a healthy long term relationship can look like. And when de Botton talks about “normalising our troubles”, I don’t interpret him as talking about normalising abuse or other harms.
p 215: “By the standards of most love stories, our own, real relationships are almost all damaged and unsatisfactory… But we should be careful not to judge our relationships by the expectations imposed on us by a frequently misleading aesthetic medium. The fault lies with art, not life. Rather than split up, we may need to tell ourselves more accurate stories - stories that don’t dwell so much on the beginning, that don’t promise us complete understanding, that strive to normalise our troubles and show us a melancholy yet hopeful path through the course of love.”
One could argue that a gap in the book is that it doesn’t deal with when people *should* leave unhealthy and harmful relationships, but I can see how that may have been outside the scope of what this book sought to achieve. This is a book that paints a more forgiving picture of what a healthy long term relationship can look like. And when de Botton talks about “normalising our troubles”, I don’t interpret him as talking about normalising abuse or other harms.
erush's review against another edition
hopeful
informative
reflective
relaxing
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.75
sandrinamenzi's review against another edition
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.5
julescooper's review against another edition
4.0
Interesting insights about relationships and love. Will definitely re-read in the future