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philippakmoore's review against another edition
5.0
Imagine having lost a beloved parent to cancer....and then finding out that you had inherited the gene that might give you cancer too.
Loss is a great distiller for all of us, and helps us realise what's most important in life. For Jean Hannah Edelstein, she also has to wrestle with her own mortality as well as the rough ocean that is grief. And so she begins an interesting journey, one that many of us can relate to and recognise ourselves in - particularly if you've lived in London during your twenties, I found those sections very moving and relatable! - but one that entails having to face the bigger questions in life much sooner than most of us normally would. Does knowing your fate make living easier...or harder? How do you face the future? We live in a world that suggests to us that we are in control of our lives and our fate....Edelstein's experiences show us that that really isn't the case at all.
"This Really Isn’t About You" is a very special memoir that manages to be courageous and heartbreaking but lighthearted at the same time. Edelstein writes frankly but also with great humour and grace.
Loss is a great distiller for all of us, and helps us realise what's most important in life. For Jean Hannah Edelstein, she also has to wrestle with her own mortality as well as the rough ocean that is grief. And so she begins an interesting journey, one that many of us can relate to and recognise ourselves in - particularly if you've lived in London during your twenties, I found those sections very moving and relatable! - but one that entails having to face the bigger questions in life much sooner than most of us normally would. Does knowing your fate make living easier...or harder? How do you face the future? We live in a world that suggests to us that we are in control of our lives and our fate....Edelstein's experiences show us that that really isn't the case at all.
"This Really Isn’t About You" is a very special memoir that manages to be courageous and heartbreaking but lighthearted at the same time. Edelstein writes frankly but also with great humour and grace.
charlottesteggz's review against another edition
5.0
Now this is an excellently written book. Witty, beautifully written. One of the best books I've read this year, and I will be recommending it to anyone who will listen.
sophiedavenport's review against another edition
3.0
This book just feels unfinished. It almost seems to have ended mid sentence, but I found it interesting overall.
elnechnntt's review against another edition
3.0
Nothing terrible about this one, it just didn’t offer me what I’ve come to enjoy most about memoirs - deeper insights, reflection, connection & the ability to shift one’s experience to be something more encompassing of what we all go through - life & what it means to be human.
Without this, the whole thing just reads as a narcissistic journal. I felt Edelstein knew this when she mentions, after attending a writing workshop, she is told she has the ‘narrative jackpot’ based on her diagnosis. But she had little else to fill these pages with having otherwise lived a quite nice, very normal, successful life.
This read like a dozen conversations I’ve had through the years with friends, colleagues & strangers. The writing was fine but grating at times (monotonous repetition to try and be humorous is not my thing).
The total truth is: Edelstein has not lived an interesting life outside of what so many other people have lived & had certainly not lived enough of it worth writing a memoir about at the point she did.
Without this, the whole thing just reads as a narcissistic journal. I felt Edelstein knew this when she mentions, after attending a writing workshop, she is told she has the ‘narrative jackpot’ based on her diagnosis. But she had little else to fill these pages with having otherwise lived a quite nice, very normal, successful life.
This read like a dozen conversations I’ve had through the years with friends, colleagues & strangers. The writing was fine but grating at times (monotonous repetition to try and be humorous is not my thing).
The total truth is: Edelstein has not lived an interesting life outside of what so many other people have lived & had certainly not lived enough of it worth writing a memoir about at the point she did.
julesjb's review against another edition
3.0
This Really Isn't About You is a memoir about the author choosing to move back to the US after her father was diagnosed with lung cancer. The memoir digs through Elderstein's slices of life and is divided into three parts: BETWEEN, BEFORE and AFTER.
Overall, I enjoyed the writing style, simple and concise, but I felt this memoir was very withdrawn from any sort of real emotions. I didn’t feel any empathy for Jean Hannah Edelstein. There are some critics on the back cover and one said that the book was unsentimental (true and it bothered me), but heartbreaking. How can a story be heartbreaking without dealing with the sentiments?
This is a memoir so I can't really judge how Eldesltein wanted to tell her own story and in the end, it didn't stop me from liking the book, but I am a bit disappointed and I expected better.
Overall, I enjoyed the writing style, simple and concise, but I felt this memoir was very withdrawn from any sort of real emotions. I didn’t feel any empathy for Jean Hannah Edelstein. There are some critics on the back cover and one said that the book was unsentimental (true and it bothered me), but heartbreaking. How can a story be heartbreaking without dealing with the sentiments?
This is a memoir so I can't really judge how Eldesltein wanted to tell her own story and in the end, it didn't stop me from liking the book, but I am a bit disappointed and I expected better.
claire60's review against another edition
3.0
I had heard a lot about this book and how it was an important book about bereavement. Its very much one young woman's experience of bereavement that causes her to leave Berlin where she was happy and return to New York and the trials and tribulations that this causes her. I did enjoy the writing in places and she did make me laugh, at other times I found it self indulgent and typical of so many other books that seem to be around at the moment, particularly the part about how hard it is to live in London. Given that the author is American, it is perhaps less surprising that she gets funnier when writing about her own country. I'm also not sure that this book would be off use to anyone going through a bereavement, as she doesn't really reflect on that as much as the hype would have you believe.
amalgamemnon's review against another edition
4.0
The structure of this book sounds odd when written down - it starts at "Between", which details Edelstein's father's diagnosis, her move to New York and his sudden death. It ends with her subsequent diagnosis with Lynch syndrome, inherited from her father and which increases her risk of cancer. We then go back a decade or so with Edelstein's move to London. From the very intense, intimate time of her father's dying, we move to stories of the challenges of being young and poor in a big city you don't know all that well. But family are still very much present here, with Edelstein considering the challenges of distance and the conflicting motivations for moving away.
I love the writing on relationships, where Edelstein's surety in her sense of self really shines through; it's not a barrage of awkward, cringey moments like these things can tend to be. And the chapters about shitty jobs with abusive managers and colleagues are really well done - they're infuriating to read and must have been difficult to write.
Edelstein talks of there being so many paths open to you at this age, and the paralysing fear of choosing the wrong one. Of course later on, with her father's early passing and her diagnosis, it might feel like her path was set from the start. The slow evolution of coming to terms with this new reality is really well done, mapped out in actions and thought. There's no epiphanies, no sudden Hollywood-esque changes of perspective or realisations, and I admire how Edelstein captures the bumpy and non-linear recovery from loss and tragedy. This is a touching and human exploration of family and identity; a reflection on loss and transition that doesn't strain to deliver profound insight, and is all the better for it.
I love the writing on relationships, where Edelstein's surety in her sense of self really shines through; it's not a barrage of awkward, cringey moments like these things can tend to be. And the chapters about shitty jobs with abusive managers and colleagues are really well done - they're infuriating to read and must have been difficult to write.
Edelstein talks of there being so many paths open to you at this age, and the paralysing fear of choosing the wrong one. Of course later on, with her father's early passing and her diagnosis, it might feel like her path was set from the start. The slow evolution of coming to terms with this new reality is really well done, mapped out in actions and thought. There's no epiphanies, no sudden Hollywood-esque changes of perspective or realisations, and I admire how Edelstein captures the bumpy and non-linear recovery from loss and tragedy. This is a touching and human exploration of family and identity; a reflection on loss and transition that doesn't strain to deliver profound insight, and is all the better for it.