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maureenstantonwriter's review against another edition
4.0
This memoir is, in the end, affecting. The author lost her beloved father when she was just college-age, and her grief fractures into a mental health breakdown, manifest as a search to understand his grief over the decades earlier loss of another daughter who shares the author's name. A meta-narrative throughout the book demonstrates and at times seems to enact the author's obsessions, though at times it feels distracting and indulgent. Vanasco is not a prose stylist (in this book anyway, she has an MFA in poetry and nonfiction), but she has an interesting intellect. This could be called a fragmented memoir, told through intertwining threads, a form that perhaps mirrors the author's own rushing swirling thought processes during manic stages. By the end, I was deeply moved by a young woman's overwhelming grief and yearning for the father who adored and protected her.
thestoryprofessor's review against another edition
5.0
This is an exceptional, quick, and genuinely heartfelt memoir. Vanasco's examination of grief, mental illness, and writing is not only an evocative read, it breaks the mold in so many ways, for even she says that there are "plenty of memoirs about grief" yet none of them feel so thorough as this one does.
In researching and searching for her father, who passed away as a very interesting and secretive person, Vanasco learns more and more about her older half sister who she is named after and who died two decades before Vanasco's own birth. That alone makes for an interesting memoir, but really sold me that this memoir exceeds most others on similar topics is that Vanasco gives us inside looks into the writing process and the need to write about her father, how her mental illness shaped the journey of both writing and grieving. Vanasco really doesn't leave anything on the cutting room floor which makes this memoir vulnerable, unique, and relatable. Her process to write and doubt this memoir make all of her questions about her father feel that much more genuine.
I don't typically like memoirs because of their nature to skew events for the benefit of the author (like reportedly what happened to the extreme with Tara Westover's memoir "Educated: a memoir"), but Vanasco writes so authentically, letting us see the confusion, the brokenness, the writer's imposter syndrome, and the grief that she dealt with throughout most of her life.
In researching and searching for her father, who passed away as a very interesting and secretive person, Vanasco learns more and more about her older half sister who she is named after and who died two decades before Vanasco's own birth. That alone makes for an interesting memoir, but really sold me that this memoir exceeds most others on similar topics is that Vanasco gives us inside looks into the writing process and the need to write about her father, how her mental illness shaped the journey of both writing and grieving. Vanasco really doesn't leave anything on the cutting room floor which makes this memoir vulnerable, unique, and relatable. Her process to write and doubt this memoir make all of her questions about her father feel that much more genuine.
I don't typically like memoirs because of their nature to skew events for the benefit of the author (like reportedly what happened to the extreme with Tara Westover's memoir "Educated: a memoir"), but Vanasco writes so authentically, letting us see the confusion, the brokenness, the writer's imposter syndrome, and the grief that she dealt with throughout most of her life.
mablethescorpion's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
tense
medium-paced
5.0
It's not normal to hallucinate your eyes have fallen out. It's not normal.”
“You lose somebody perfect, then. Then you come back and tell me what's normal."
“You lose somebody perfect, then. Then you come back and tell me what's normal."
claire_fuller_writer's review against another edition
5.0
I loved this memoir about Vanasco's grief which spirals into mental illness after the death of her father. Although, perhaps the mental illness was there all along, it just took the death for it to properly manifest itself. This is something that Vanasco discusses in a wonderfully round-about way. The book is broken up into many very short pieces, all of which build and gather to give a really intimate view of what life is like for the author, and how she becomes obsessed by her dead half-sister whom she was named for. I often felt like I was right inside Vanasco's head as she works things out on the page, and also right inside her present time, as she even grapples with editing her book (shout out to Masie Cochran from Tin House!).
Highly recommended.
Highly recommended.
jennamead4's review against another edition
5.0
Raw, real, emotional. This book gave me a better understanding of both mental illness and grief because Jeannie let us in. She was vulnerable in the best way.
jeannepathfinder's review against another edition
4.0
This memoir grabbed my attention and I read it one day. It was rather melancholy, but it had many themes that twisted around and kept it interesting.
sandra_goodson's review against another edition
2.0
I guess I have a problem with books written from the point of view of someone suffering from mental illness. They seem self indulgent. The parents probably did Jeannie Vanasco a disservice by naming her after a dead sister but by the same token I don't understand her obsession with the dead sister. Reading about someone suffering from mental illness can get tedious. It's like listening to someone tell you about a dream. The outsider doesn't always understand the significance of certain details.
whatever... hopefully the author was able to work through her problems while writing this book and more importantly, move on with her own life.
whatever... hopefully the author was able to work through her problems while writing this book and more importantly, move on with her own life.
hurleywink's review against another edition
5.0
I loved everything about the structure of this memoir, particularly the painstaking urgency of it. Kudos, Jeannie Vanasco. This is a beautiful book.
sashmcgash's review against another edition
3.0
2.75? I don’t know! She acknowledges this but there’s really not much of a plot here. Which is valid, it’s a memoir not a novel, but I’m not sure what I was supposed to get out of it. It was a pretty easy quick read and some parts were interesting. I like the idea of commenting on your writing as like a meta part of the memoir but I don’t think it really worked, it felt forced.