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Reviews
How to Survive a Horror Movie: All the Skills to Dodge the Kills by Wes Craven, Seth Grahame-Smith
anacmc's review against another edition
adventurous
funny
informative
lighthearted
relaxing
fast-paced
4.0
raynestorm's review against another edition
5.0
A Near-Perfect Guide
If you want to know how to survive the horror movie you currently find yourself in, this is the book for you!! Witty, user-friendly, and accompanied by some excellent illustrations, this is a text I highly recommend for even casual horror fans.
If you want to know how to survive the horror movie you currently find yourself in, this is the book for you!! Witty, user-friendly, and accompanied by some excellent illustrations, this is a text I highly recommend for even casual horror fans.
iamastraythought's review against another edition
funny
informative
lighthearted
fast-paced
4.0
Just a very good book. Made me laugh out loud more than once.
cyanide_latte's review against another edition
funny
fast-paced
5.0
Listen, if you know horror movie tropes fairly well, enjoy references and need a good laugh, I don't know if there's a better book to recommend. This puts me in a good mood, and it's worth the read at least once.
maha's review against another edition
3.0
Pop Sugar Reading Challenge - A book you picked because the title caught your attention
this was really funny but mostly just him making fun of clichés in horror movies. I had fun reading it but now I want a book that actually tells me how to survive in horror-movie-like situations.
this was really funny but mostly just him making fun of clichés in horror movies. I had fun reading it but now I want a book that actually tells me how to survive in horror-movie-like situations.
peterseanesq's review against another edition
4.0
How to Survive a Horror Movie by Seth Grahame-Smith
Please give my Amazon review a helpful vote - https://www.amazon.com/gp/customer-reviews/R34HFWLIK9JT6P?ref=pf_ov_at_pdctrvw_srp
The author of "Abraham Lincoln - Vampire Slayer" asks the question, "what if you suddenly find yourself in a horror movie? What should you do?"
If you find yourself at a summer camp which has a dodgy history or buying a house sitting on an Indian graveyard, you should pay close attention.
Grahame-Smith runs his premise through various horror sub-genres and horror tropes in a fairly straightforward way. Some of his observations are subversive; others are funny. I loved his "ejection seat" sections where he suggests how to "flip the script" on the horror director/writer. For example, Grahame-Smith suggests that you flee to a mall. Since horror film budgets are so low that they could not afford renting out the mall, you should be safe.
Or you could employ product placement:
"EJECTION SEAT #3 is the Awkward Product Placement. What’s the hero’s favorite beer? Chances are, the brand that’s just written a big check to the producers. Product placement is a much-loved means of padding a movie’s budget, but the filmmakers usually take great care to keep it subtle. After all, you can’t have your characters making obvious pitches. If you find yourself cornered by a horror villain, try buying precious time with the clumsiest, cheesiest advertisement you can imagine.
Doing so will confuse your attacker, and maybe—just maybe—allow you to escape.
YOU:You can crush my skull, but you can’t crush my thirst… (turn to imaginary camera) The way a refreshing Blue Bird Cola can!
YOU: There’s no need to clean out my bowels with that machete! Just use… (turn to imaginary camera) Gut Grease natural laxative—the brand trusted by more astronauts!"
It's worth a try.
Please give my Amazon review a helpful vote - https://www.amazon.com/gp/customer-reviews/R34HFWLIK9JT6P?ref=pf_ov_at_pdctrvw_srp
The author of "Abraham Lincoln - Vampire Slayer" asks the question, "what if you suddenly find yourself in a horror movie? What should you do?"
If you find yourself at a summer camp which has a dodgy history or buying a house sitting on an Indian graveyard, you should pay close attention.
Grahame-Smith runs his premise through various horror sub-genres and horror tropes in a fairly straightforward way. Some of his observations are subversive; others are funny. I loved his "ejection seat" sections where he suggests how to "flip the script" on the horror director/writer. For example, Grahame-Smith suggests that you flee to a mall. Since horror film budgets are so low that they could not afford renting out the mall, you should be safe.
Or you could employ product placement:
"EJECTION SEAT #3 is the Awkward Product Placement. What’s the hero’s favorite beer? Chances are, the brand that’s just written a big check to the producers. Product placement is a much-loved means of padding a movie’s budget, but the filmmakers usually take great care to keep it subtle. After all, you can’t have your characters making obvious pitches. If you find yourself cornered by a horror villain, try buying precious time with the clumsiest, cheesiest advertisement you can imagine.
Doing so will confuse your attacker, and maybe—just maybe—allow you to escape.
YOU:You can crush my skull, but you can’t crush my thirst… (turn to imaginary camera) The way a refreshing Blue Bird Cola can!
YOU: There’s no need to clean out my bowels with that machete! Just use… (turn to imaginary camera) Gut Grease natural laxative—the brand trusted by more astronauts!"
It's worth a try.
realbooks4ever's review against another edition
3.0
Some lines made me laugh but I was offended by Graham-Smith's objectification of women.
tightropetothesun's review against another edition
4.0
If you answer yes to three or more of these questions, we can conclude beyond any reasonable doubt that your house is haunted.
1. Do the faucets or shower-heads bleed?
2. Did the previous tenants die as the result of a murder or suicide?
3. Does furniture rearrange itself when you aren't looking?
4. When you reach into the refrigerator, does your arm appear in another part of the house?
5. Are there civil war era children playing in your attic?
6. Does the house issue verbal or written warnings?
7. Does the temperature suddenly plummet if you discuss remodeling?
8. Do you feel more compelled to murder your family with an axe than usual?
9. Are Native Americans constantly showing up to ask, "What happened to our cemetery?"
10. Does the house contain any candelabras?
This was a super fun read for a horror movie fan like myself. It was full of the "rules" (tropes/cliches) of horror films and how to avoid them if you ever find yourself stuck in one. There were a few things that didn't seem to fit as well with the bulk of the advice. Such as: realizing that you are in a horror movie and that the directors/producers/filmmakers cannot afford certain sets and that you should be safe if you just make your way to a sporting event/concert/mall ect. But, overall it flowed nicely.
I'm not sure this was super successful as an audiobook. I think the lack of formatting took away some of the coherence, SO, I would definitely recommend getting your hands on a physical copy or at least an e-copy and reading it, rather than listening. 4 stars
1. Do the faucets or shower-heads bleed?
2. Did the previous tenants die as the result of a murder or suicide?
3. Does furniture rearrange itself when you aren't looking?
4. When you reach into the refrigerator, does your arm appear in another part of the house?
5. Are there civil war era children playing in your attic?
6. Does the house issue verbal or written warnings?
7. Does the temperature suddenly plummet if you discuss remodeling?
8. Do you feel more compelled to murder your family with an axe than usual?
9. Are Native Americans constantly showing up to ask, "What happened to our cemetery?"
10. Does the house contain any candelabras?
This was a super fun read for a horror movie fan like myself. It was full of the "rules" (tropes/cliches) of horror films and how to avoid them if you ever find yourself stuck in one. There were a few things that didn't seem to fit as well with the bulk of the advice. Such as:
I'm not sure this was super successful as an audiobook. I think the lack of formatting took away some of the coherence, SO, I would definitely recommend getting your hands on a physical copy or at least an e-copy and reading it, rather than listening. 4 stars
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