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sourbutchkid's review
emotional
funny
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
4.0
I love queer people
finalgirlfall's review
5.0
how magical that we spend our lives discovering ourselves. what is so clear to others escapes us until someone taps us on the shoulder and calls us by our hidden name.this anthology… jesus christ! made me think.
brassicarapa's review
emotional
hopeful
lighthearted
4.5
Content Warnings
Moderate: Alcoholism
Minor: Drug use, Violence, Racism, Transphobia, Homophobia, Sexual assault, Lesbophobia, Rape, and Religious bigotry
ltnightjar's review
fast-paced
4.5
read the foreword for a class, then ended up reading the whole thing.
favourite essays:
favourite essays:
- Forward! - Joan Nestle
- My First Lover Was Not a Lesbian - Kimberly Dark
- Never Be Hungry Again - Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha
- Femme Butch Feminist - Jewelle Gomez
- Home/Sickness: Self Diagnosis - romham padraig gallacher
- To All the Butches I Loved Between 1995 and 2005: An Open Letter about Selling Sex, Selling Out, and Soldiering On - Amber Dawn
- With Both Fists: Conscious Gender Building through the Butch and Femme Identities - Sinclair Sexsmith
- baby butch: a love letter from the future - Melissa Sky
- FEMME SHARK MANIFESTO! - Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha
Content Warnings
Moderate: Transphobia
The essay by Victoria A. Brownworth "No Butches, No Femmes: The Mainstreaming of Queer Sexuality" relies partially on the transphobic "butch flight" trope that butch lesbians and femme gay men are being pressured into identifying as transgender, contributing to the marginalization of butch/femme dynamics. To illustrate this point, Brownworth also fearmongers about butch lesbians coming to regret hormone replacement therapy and gender confirmation surgeries.lesbrary's review
4.0
If I could guarantee one thing, it's that at least one entry in this collection will piss you off. There are opinions all over the spectrum in this collection, and there is a lot to be debated. For example: do butch and femme constitute each other, or can you be a butch without a femme and vice versa? Are femmes more privileged by having "passing privilege", or are they invisibilized, or are people just not looking hard enough for femmes? Is the concept of "butch" too tied to whiteness to be used in an antiracist way? Can other sexualities and genders by butch or femme, or only lesbians? Where do butch and femme fit into the trans spectrum, or vice versa, or are they unconnected? It is the trans questions that are particularly divisive. But I think this range is the strength of the collection: it is a good attempt to encapsulate a broad-ranging community that is entirely in flux. And the voices are strong, so even the essays that were actively angering me were still compelling.
wndrbread's review
4.0
A great anthology. Laughed, cried, felt seen and was brought new perspectives. Would recommend.
corneliusmcstrawberry's review
informative
reflective
4.0
im a young transmasc person, wondering for a while whether if they are butch. this should be strongly recommended reading to anyone remotely like me — young queers (gen z), mascs, femmes, frankly anyone who does not have very much knowledge of butch/femme/lesbian experience. this not only gave me insight into myself but it gave me tremendous insight into lesbian identity, sexuality, relationships and dynamics. as queer folk we’re often lumped together as if we’re monolithic. we may unite together in the same fight — as we should — but we still know intrinsically that we are not the same; this is not the case. as such, i think it’s vital that we learn from each other and gain a greater awareness of the unique circumstances that cultivate and influence our identities and dynamics. for example, i did not know that (at least, when the book was written), there is/was specific etiquettes/codes/rules between butches and femmes. whether or not this etiquette is necessary or helpful in modern day, in 2024, is likely a debate that has been going on for some time and as someone who still is, admittedly, a bit ignorant, i want to say that it remains to be seen — however, it’s this inherent disconnect between young queer folk and queer histories, the lack of mentorship and orally transmitted traditions, that irks me. as such, i believe this book is a great resource and starting point for learning about the communities that have come before us, regardless of how we are situated, and i am ever so grateful for ivan coyote in particular.