Reviews tagging 'Emotional abuse'

The School for Good Mothers by Jessamine Chan

136 reviews

emmmillly's review

challenging dark emotional fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child abuse, Emotional abuse, and Abandonment

amanda_reads13's review against another edition

dark emotional sad slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? No
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

Frida's one very bad day results in her being sent to a one-year program to become a "better mother". 

The premise is a commentary on the very real control our patriarchal government has over our lives. The book was incredibly disturbing; I felt very uncomfortable and angry throughout the story. I had to take many breaks while listening. The author successfully illustrates the pressures put on mothers to be perfect and the unrealistic expectations society expects them to meet. It also sheds light on the racial prejudices towards mothers of colour as they endure even harsher punishments. 

Frida is a single mom struggling to find balance. She is overworked, stressed, and probably dealing with post-partum depression. On her worst day she makes the choice to leave her daughter home alone for two hours, which is reported by the neighbours. That day her daughter is taken from her and Frida ends up being sent to a Big Brother type institution. Here, the mothers endure harsh and strict rules and while being pushed to achieve unrealisticly high standards of perfection. 

My main issue with the book is our main character. She is not a sympathetic or likable character. She made a terrible choice that put her daughter in danger. If we really look at her, her concern is not for her child's welfare, it's for her own and her "need" to be with her baby. I was really waiting for that "ah-ha" moment when she realizes that her behaviour truly put her daughter at risk, but there wasn't. There was so much focus on her whining and lamenting her situation, which I get. Her daughter was taken from her, her husband left her for another woman, and the school is awful, BUT there is little to no growth in her character. Her pride stands in her way at every step.

Also, the plot is very, very slow. Since this was a dystop an society, I wanted more world building. Does society truly not know about these schools? How is this abuse allowed to occur? 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Mental illness, Abandonment, Grief, Gaslighting, Infidelity, Emotional abuse, Child abuse, Suicide, and Confinement

stellahadz's review

dark emotional sad fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

A gripping and haunting story about the way society judges mothers. It's dystopian but on a small scale; it imagines a world that's just like ours, but just one step further. Any woman judged to be a "bad" mother for any reason ranging from physical abuse to coddling, is sent to a "school," ostensibly to be rehabilitated. This book is simultaneously a commentary on the unfair treatment of women deemed to be "bad mothers" and on the carceral system. It is difficult to read at times because of how harshly these women are criticized by the "instructors" and how heartbroken they are to be separated from their children all while being told they are bad people whose children are better off without them. Although I don't have kids yet, I really felt for Frida; the author captures her feelings and thoughts in such a relatable way. It made me think of how easily this story could play out in the world we live in, and how it already does play out for a lot of people. We treat all people who have done "bad" things the same way - sentencing them to prison time and telling them they are irredeemably awful people - regardless of the severity of their offense or any explanation that might exist for their behavior. When it comes to parenting and other situations where women are expected to be loving and selfless and happy at all times, the judgment of other people can start to feel like a mental prison. The School for Good Mothers is excellent food for thought about what the world would look like if we were less judgmental and more supportive of people whose behavior we don't understand or approve of. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Confinement

Moderate: Emotional abuse, Suicide, and Sexual content

Minor: Medical content and Racism

rei_reads's review

challenging dark emotional sad medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Infidelity, Gaslighting, Grief, Mental illness, Emotional abuse, Bullying, Forced institutionalization, Misogyny, Confinement, Sexism, Suicide, Suicidal thoughts, and Sexual content

Moderate: Self harm, Abandonment, Racism, Medical content, Physical abuse, Body shaming, Lesbophobia, and Injury/Injury detail

Minor: Sexual assault and Pregnancy

crystalsparkles's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional mysterious reflective sad tense fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

Highly recommend checking out the trigger warnings first and only read if you can truly handle them.  This book is soooo good.  The story had me raging, and bawling, frustrated by injustice and hopeful… It is devastating. There were times when I didn’t know if I could finish the story, because it almost hits too hard. Especially in the global political climate, who’s to say this is too far of a stretch for North America sometime in the nearish future.  It will surely make you question your own parenting.  

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Self harm, Infidelity, Forced institutionalization, Confinement, Suicide, Emotional abuse, Domestic abuse, Child abuse, Suicidal thoughts, Abandonment, Racism, Suicide attempt, Mental illness, Grief, and Gaslighting

Moderate: Body shaming, Bullying, Drug abuse, Toxic relationship, Sexual content, Classism, Alcoholism, Violence, Pregnancy, Panic attacks/disorders, Addiction, Police brutality, Cultural appropriation, Colonisation, Drug use, Eating disorder, Homophobia, Alcohol, Car accident, Toxic friendship, Lesbophobia, Injury/Injury detail, Hate crime, and Blood

Minor: Pedophilia, Kidnapping, and Cancer

erica_reads_things's review

challenging dark emotional reflective sad slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.0

Heartwrenching and infuriating. The type of dystopian that doesn't really seem that dystopian compared to the realities under the surface of child protective services and the unrealistic expectations on mothers today. A great look into generational immigrant trauma, motherhood (especially compared to fatherhood), mistakes, and love. The midsection could have been tightened up a bit, but I still appreciated how the details of daily life highlighted just how long this felt to the mothers too. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Gaslighting, Suicidal thoughts, Bullying, Emotional abuse, and Forced institutionalization

Moderate: Pregnancy, Child abuse, Self harm, Classism, Injury/Injury detail, Racial slurs, Racism, Death, Kidnapping, Suicide, and Miscarriage

Minor: Body shaming, Physical abuse, and Sexual content

bookdragonkatie's review against another edition

challenging emotional sad tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

Infuriating. An extremely well-written and well-crafted novel, but absolutely infuriating and heart-wrenching. Check TW/CW before picking this one up; it is not a book I would recommend to just anyone, but I do think those who enjoy dystopian novels, particularly those novels that feel real or that they *could* see happening in the near future, will enjoy this read. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Grief, Emotional abuse, Forced institutionalization, Gaslighting, and Bullying

Moderate: Miscarriage, Racial slurs, Addiction, Cursing, Self harm, Physical abuse, Suicidal thoughts, Abandonment, Confinement, Racism, Eating disorder, Injury/Injury detail, Suicide, Child abuse, Death, Pregnancy, and Violence

natspat98's review against another edition

dark mysterious reflective sad medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Plot
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Abandonment, Body shaming, Child abuse, Child death, Forced institutionalization, and Emotional abuse

Moderate: Classism, Racism, Suicide, Suicidal thoughts, Religious bigotry, Addiction, Panic attacks/disorders, Misogyny, Confinement, Violence, and Toxic relationship

fuzzy_fairy's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional sad tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Plot
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Forced institutionalization, Child abuse, Physical abuse, and Emotional abuse

junglejelly's review against another edition

dark emotional sad fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Plot
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.75

I couldn't put this book down at times. It's so immersive and gripping.

The characters aren't loveable but they're incredibly relatable. They're not prefect but make a great comparison to how high expectations are held for mothers in this world.

I found the plot gripping but predictable in the way that I wasn't surprised at what came next. I've read a few reviews saying the events are not believable but I found them to be a little too believable (e.g.

the constant contradictory behaviour of the instructors and expectations of the school and the lower expectations for the fathers

).

As someone who is not a parent, I still felt the devastation come from the characters. It was hard not to relate to them all (yes even Gus and Susanna) under such awful circumstances.

Overall a very good but sad book with contrasting features making it a compelling read.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Sexual content, Suicidal thoughts, and Mental illness

Moderate: Kidnapping, Child abuse, Miscarriage, Misogyny, Suicide, Forced institutionalization, Abandonment, Grief, Physical abuse, Gaslighting, and Emotional abuse

Minor: Eating disorder, Sexism, Pregnancy, Racial slurs, Lesbophobia, Racism, and Self harm