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winternat's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
informative
reflective
slow-paced
4.0
alexandra_7's review against another edition
5.0
This book was fantastic - an amazing insight into the Victorian domestic life through the marriages of five famous authors. I thoroughly enjoyed reading about each one of them, they were all well-researched and entertaining, even though, as the author said - she chose more unhappy couples, rather than happy ones.
I was looking forward to reading about Charles Dickens's marriage since he is one of my favourite authors, but oh boy, I wasn't prepared for the disappointment. As they say: Never meet your heroes. It was really sad to see what a manipulative, egocentric jerk he was in real life. The way he treated his poor wife and blamed her for everything while painting himself as the "victim" made me angry. I feel very conflicted now between my love for Dickens's books and the hate for the man himself. :')
I was looking forward to reading about Charles Dickens's marriage since he is one of my favourite authors, but oh boy, I wasn't prepared for the disappointment. As they say: Never meet your heroes. It was really sad to see what a manipulative, egocentric jerk he was in real life. The way he treated his poor wife and blamed her for everything while painting himself as the "victim" made me angry. I feel very conflicted now between my love for Dickens's books and the hate for the man himself. :')
paperbacksandpines's review against another edition
4.0
Am I the only one that is surprised that this book was written in the 80s?
I can appreciate this book on multiple levels. I bought this book because I was interested in the biographies of 5 Victorian couples. I had mistakenly assumed that the marriages focused on in this book would be happy ones but rather, they were kind of a mixed bag. However, this didn't decrease my enjoyment of the book.
I think the author's main purpose in writing this book was to view these marriages through a feminist lens. One of these marriages was doomed from the start, one marriage wasn't an equal partnership by rather a willing slave/master partnership, another wasn't even a marriage in actuality but rather a common law marriage or "marriage of the hearts and mind." It was both enlightening and disheartening to read the stories of these marriages. It made me wonder how many regular, everyday marriages resembled one of the ones chronicled in this book. Women at this time weren't faced with a lot of options. They had to consider money and how they would be cared for (and by whom). They didn't usually have the option to remain single (if they wanted to ) or get married (if they weren't considered eligible enough). I was particularly affected by George Eliot's plight and the rock and the hard place she was put in when it came to choosing between love or her reputation.
I found Rose's mentions of Christianity and faith to be garbage, especially when she put things she disagreed with in quotes and then clearly veered off the path by inserting her unwanted opinion instead of sticking to the narrative.
An unintended consequence of reading this book has led me to being interested in watching Effie Gray again, perhaps this time without a more one sided view, as well as checking out all of George Eliot's books looking for themes that were most important to her. In addition, I still want to check out [b:The Carlyles at Home|2662175|The Carlyles at Home|Thea Holme|https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1348315963l/2662175._SX50_.jpg|2687401], although now with the knowledge that their marriage wasn't the happiest of unions.
I can appreciate this book on multiple levels. I bought this book because I was interested in the biographies of 5 Victorian couples. I had mistakenly assumed that the marriages focused on in this book would be happy ones but rather, they were kind of a mixed bag. However, this didn't decrease my enjoyment of the book.
I think the author's main purpose in writing this book was to view these marriages through a feminist lens. One of these marriages was doomed from the start, one marriage wasn't an equal partnership by rather a willing slave/master partnership, another wasn't even a marriage in actuality but rather a common law marriage or "marriage of the hearts and mind." It was both enlightening and disheartening to read the stories of these marriages. It made me wonder how many regular, everyday marriages resembled one of the ones chronicled in this book. Women at this time weren't faced with a lot of options. They had to consider money and how they would be cared for (and by whom). They didn't usually have the option to remain single (if they wanted to ) or get married (if they weren't considered eligible enough). I was particularly affected by George Eliot's plight and the rock and the hard place she was put in when it came to choosing between love or her reputation.
I found Rose's mentions of Christianity and faith to be garbage, especially when she put things she disagreed with in quotes and then clearly veered off the path by inserting her unwanted opinion instead of sticking to the narrative.
An unintended consequence of reading this book has led me to being interested in watching Effie Gray again, perhaps this time without a more one sided view, as well as checking out all of George Eliot's books looking for themes that were most important to her. In addition, I still want to check out [b:The Carlyles at Home|2662175|The Carlyles at Home|Thea Holme|https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1348315963l/2662175._SX50_.jpg|2687401], although now with the knowledge that their marriage wasn't the happiest of unions.
linaleigh's review against another edition
3.0
Interesting concept, and I enjoyed the stories, but I found the writing a bit dry, and wanted to read more about the marriages before we moved on to the next couple.
hellomei's review against another edition
funny
informative
reflective
medium-paced
5.0
SO MUCH FUN. i love gossip presented as academic literature, and i love the fuckedupness of the victorian era. i was so invested and entertained that i'd stop to tell friends and family what was going on and i didn't want to finish the book.
quick reviews:
jane & carlyle: jane's arc is a ride and i want to read her published letters/diaries now. love her guilt-tripping. i agree with the author that jane is the true heroine of this book of stories
effie and ruskin: I'M SO GLAD SHE GOT OUT!!! it felt like it was only a matter of time and i'm amazed she did that back when it was so hard to do. ruskin is a manchild. i kind of feel for millais...
taylor and mill: honestly the best one for me, even though george and george are right there. mill's "yes dear" energy is so funny to me. hand in unlovable hand
catherine and dickens: dickens sure is some guy. i feel vindicated that he didn't get the public redemption he wanted lol suck it
eliot and lewes: very sweet actually. i'm so happy eliot found love (and was even able to remarry after) and that they were such a good match. theirs was the healthiest relationship
the author dives into each couple's story in a more nuanced way than my reactionary take can capture, and brings up a lot of thought-provoking stuff about marriage and long-term companionship. this book should probably have convinced me that getting married is a waste of time, but phyllis rose does a good job of emphasizing the good in these narratives, or at least prompting you to ponder how else things could have played out. in the end each of the people in these stories is human, fallible to human emotions and what they drive them to do. rather than dissuading the reader from marriage, phyllis rose makes relationships feel like adventures. i feel more appreciative of my own existing relationships, in all their flawed fullness :)
quick reviews:
effie and ruskin: I'M SO GLAD SHE GOT OUT!!! it felt like it was only a matter of time and i'm amazed she did that back when it was so hard to do. ruskin is a manchild. i kind of feel for millais...
taylor and mill: honestly the best one for me, even though george and george are right there. mill's "yes dear" energy is so funny to me. hand in unlovable hand
catherine and dickens: dickens sure is some guy. i feel vindicated that he didn't get the public redemption he wanted lol suck it
eliot and lewes: very sweet actually. i'm so happy eliot found love (and was even able to remarry after) and that they were such a good match. theirs was the healthiest relationship
the author dives into each couple's story in a more nuanced way than my reactionary take can capture, and brings up a lot of thought-provoking stuff about marriage and long-term companionship. this book should probably have convinced me that getting married is a waste of time, but phyllis rose does a good job of emphasizing the good in these narratives, or at least prompting you to ponder how else things could have played out. in the end each of the people in these stories is human, fallible to human emotions and what they drive them to do. rather than dissuading the reader from marriage, phyllis rose makes relationships feel like adventures. i feel more appreciative of my own existing relationships, in all their flawed fullness :)
katums's review against another edition
challenging
informative
reflective
medium-paced
jrc2011's review against another edition
4.0
What a great social history of personal relationships - whether they were larger-than-life literary figures or not, these well documented couples present variations on a theme of women's role in Victorian England. Fantastic read - well written, very enjoyable.
Sadly, I loaned my copy to someone and it hasn't returned. It seems like a re-read is in order with all the celebratory fluff around Charles Dickens. The section on Charles Dickens relationship with his wife in this book merits more attention. Yes, he was a talented writer and overcame much but he was also an incredible dick! He philandered, he was controlling and abusive with his family, and more.
Sadly, I loaned my copy to someone and it hasn't returned. It seems like a re-read is in order with all the celebratory fluff around Charles Dickens. The section on Charles Dickens relationship with his wife in this book merits more attention. Yes, he was a talented writer and overcame much but he was also an incredible dick! He philandered, he was controlling and abusive with his family, and more.
thegrandnarrative's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
5.0