Reviews tagging 'Infidelity'

You Exist Too Much by Zaina Arafat

68 reviews

sydnec's review against another edition

emotional funny inspiring reflective medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Infidelity, Alcohol, Homophobia, Eating disorder, Gaslighting, Emotional abuse, and Lesbophobia

Minor: Injury/Injury detail, Self harm, Pregnancy, Mental illness, and Sexism

jayisreading's review against another edition

challenging emotional reflective medium-paced

3.0

This novel didn’t quite work for me. I think there were a couple gems, such as the way Arafat explored her unnamed protagonist’s identity and its complexities. This isn’t just a novel about a messy bisexual who made a lot of poor choices; it’s also very much a novel about a Palestinian American who is trying to make sense of her cultural identity in relation to her sexuality. This is further complicated by the protagonist’s relationship with her mother and the tensions that come with not being “enough” while also being “too much.” I can see why Arafat felt that all of these things needed to be addressed in the novel, and I can’t really imagine it without all of these moving pieces. However, I felt that the author only scratched the surface as a result of having too much she wanted to write about, resulting in a somewhat superficial, not-fully-realized exploration of the protagonist’s understanding of the world. 

I think Arafat is a good writer, and while messy protagonists don’t always work for me, I was still compelled to follow the one she wrote. I just think the way she chose to organize this novel didn’t work for me.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Toxic relationship, Emotional abuse, Eating disorder, Addiction, and Infidelity

Moderate: Biphobia, Alcohol, Drug use, and Homophobia

Minor: Racism

brotestantethic's review against another edition

emotional funny reflective fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

The true definition of raw. Arafat achieved a stream of consciousness, across several years of plot, that will ring true with some part of the reader, no matter how small. The main character is selfish, traitorous, and destructive, and yet you root for her. Her huge personality is a major draw of this book.

This would have been five stars, but it is possible to be too raw, and this teeters the line. There is a lot going on, like in life, and it is hard to grasp what the meaning is of a particular chapter. I also found the treatment center confusing, with predictable characters and dialogue. Still I loved the unconventional structure and will be thinking about this book for a very long time. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Sexual content, Emotional abuse, and Infidelity

Moderate: Suicidal thoughts and Eating disorder

queergoth_reads's review against another edition

emotional reflective medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.75

I could not put this down. I picked it up when I was struggling to read anything else and I finished it in one sitting. 

It wasn't exatly an easy fun read. It was incredibly emotional and it was fantastic. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Infidelity, Toxic relationship, Eating disorder, and Emotional abuse

Moderate: Biphobia and Homophobia

errie's review against another edition

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? No
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.5

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Emotional abuse, Eating disorder, Infidelity, Mental illness, Toxic relationship, and Toxic friendship

Moderate: Suicidal thoughts, Addiction, Sexual content, Alcohol, Drug use, Homophobia, Domestic abuse, Islamophobia, Pedophilia, Self harm, and Biphobia

chunri's review against another edition

slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? No
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Infidelity, Eating disorder, and Sexual assault

sarahbearas's review against another edition

challenging emotional reflective tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

This book made me feel a lot of things - compassion, anxiety, sympathy, despair - but ultimately I felt a bit empty at the end. Maybe I just need to sit with this book for longer, synthesize the story more in order to come to a more complete understanding. And confession: I got about 200 pages in and then realized I was not reading a memoir. I don’t even know how to explain myself. But here’s what I will say: As a queer woman myself my God, some parts of the story just made me want to take a walk around the block (in a good way - Arafat is a very compelling author). I think the book does a good job in tackling the complexity of addiction, of our habits and defenses, and how it's rooted in our upbringing. How the cycle of self destruction is perpetuated and the effort it takes in order to break it. By the very nature of the topics at hand, the story is cyclical, and I will go as far as to say it's repetitive. The last hundred or so pages I was feeling like it was a slog. I just wish there was more urgency as it felt there was the first 80%. It felt too long and too quick all at once (the last 20% I mean). 

Again, having just finished this recently, I think my feelings will change a little bit the more I sit and digest this. I think even with my dissatisfaction with the last bit of the book, I think it's still a very good read. The narrator feels very close to the reader, and I was very invested in the journey she took. 

Solid 3 from me!

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Emotional abuse, Infidelity, Eating disorder, and Child abuse

Minor: Self harm

kathleenivy's review against another edition

emotional hopeful reflective medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.25

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Infidelity, Biphobia, Eating disorder, and Emotional abuse

Moderate: Racial slurs, Toxic relationship, Homophobia, Islamophobia, Sexual content, Lesbophobia, Panic attacks/disorders, Death, Colonisation, Adult/minor relationship, Alcohol, Mental illness, and Religious bigotry

Minor: Drug abuse, Genocide, Racism, Alcoholism, and Outing

dragongirl271's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional reflective fast-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Eating disorder, Biphobia, Homophobia, Infidelity, Emotional abuse, Sexism, and Racism

Minor: Drug use, Domestic abuse, Death, and Police brutality

jourdanicus's review against another edition

emotional reflective medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

I didn't expect this book to speak to my mommy issues so much buuuut... That's what resonated with me most from it.

As a white gal who grew up with a toxic mother, it has always interested me how women from other cultures (especially those where filial loyalty/community are more prioritized) approach relationships with their narcissistic mothers. I feel this novel gave me some insight into that, and fit into my current interest in reading from the Palestinian diaspora.

The characters here are deeply humanized; not always likeable or agreeable, but that gives them even more depth. Toward the end (80-90% in the audio) I found myself wondering where the story was going, but I think part of the point of a book like this is that it doesn't have to "go" anywhere. Life doesn't tie up in a neat bow and roll the credits, relationships are complicated and don't always come with tidy ends or easy answers, and Arafat illustrated that well with this book's direction and conclusion.

I think I'll be thinking about this one for a while.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Sexual content, Toxic relationship, and Infidelity

Moderate: Alcohol, Abandonment, Colonisation, Addiction, Biphobia, Homophobia, Eating disorder, and Emotional abuse

Minor: Death, Pregnancy, Police brutality, and Drug abuse